by Lynda Chance
His eyes narrowed on her while she took deep breaths, trying to calm herself down. She hadn't ever planned on telling him any of that. But he'd given her no time to think up a suitable excuse with his demand for an immediate answer.
While she tried to get herself under control, she felt him watching her from across the table. She felt like an insect under a microscope, he was watching her so intently.
The waiter came up and deposited their food and this time, Jessica very meticulously kept her eyes away from the young man until he'd finished delivering the meals and left. She picked up her fork and began moving her food around on her plate.
"You passed."
Jessica exhaled a pent up breath and looked across the table at Connor.
"Where do you go to school?" he asked.
The coiled rope in her stomach loosened a tiny bit. "UTD," she answered him. An expression crossed his face that she couldn't identify, and thinking he didn't recognize the acronym, she elaborated, "The University of Texas at Dallas."
After a prolonged moment, he answered her tersely, "Yeah, I know what UTD stands for." His eyes released hers and he picked up his napkin and looked down at his plate, still with a frown on his face.
The knot in her stomach tightened again. "Okay. Now what?" she managed to ask.
There was a long silence until finally he answered her, "Now we eat. Then you prove your claim of no tattoos. Then we negotiate."
Her eyes flared. "How do I prove I don't have any tattoos?"
"You show me your body."
The oxygen snarled in Jessica's lungs as panic infiltrated her. "Why won't you just believe me? Why would I lie when you're going to find out anyway?"
"You'd be surprised at the depth that some people will go to in this world."
"You've done this before? This isn't your first time?"
He picked up his fork and began eating. He swallowed, and answered her. "I haven't done this before, not completely, anyway. You're the fourth woman I've met, but the only one I've decided to go further with. I'm just saying that I've come across a lot of people in my life who wouldn't hesitate to lie about anything if it brought them financial gain or made things easier for them."
"I'm not showing you my body tonight."
"Yes, you are."
She shook her head as her eyes clung to the plate in front of her.
"Yes," he said unequivocally as he continued to eat.
Her head lifted. "No. Where would we do it, anyway? I can't just strip right here and now."
"We'll go to the hotel across the street."
Jessica sucked in an alarmed breath. "No effing way."
His stare was intent, hot on hers. "Jessica, calm down and eat your food."
Jessica moved the food around on her plate and managed to eat maybe three bites before she gave up altogether.
Before she knew it and long before she could get her nerves under control, he paid the bill and hustled her across the street until they were sitting in the hotel bar in a darkened corner. He ordered another round of drinks and the closer it came to becoming a reality in her life, the more she began to tremble.
"You need to get a grip. Have a few sips of my drink and we'll talk some more." He pushed his drink toward her and she was just nervous enough to lift it to her mouth. She took a large gulp and almost immediately began choking. It tasted like crap, but there was no doubt the alcohol induced a slow-growing warmth that spread through her veins and made her feel better. She took another drink before he slid it away from her.
"You need to understand what I require from this deal, okay?" he asked.
"Okay."
"All I want is sex." When he made that statement, her eyes cut away from his, but he reached out and pulled her chin back toward him until her eyes were focused on his again. His fingers were rough and callused and she wondered what he did for a living. "All I want is sex," he reiterated. "I'll never want anything more. I want a female body, a vessel. And I'm willing to pay for it. That's it."
"I understand." She almost said 'okay' again, but caught herself because it sounded too much like an agreement.
"If you're willing to do this, I have to make sure, upfront, that you do understand. There won't be anything deviant, I'd never hurt you, but this won't be making love. It's going to be fucking, you understand?"
She steeled her spine and focused on her goal and not on what he was telling her. She was going to be a geologist. She was going to get her degree. She was. "Yes."
He continued to spell it out for her in descriptive terms that she couldn't fail to understand. "It's not going to be pretty, no flowers and no jewelry. I'm not going to seduce you. You're going to take my money, and in return, I get to fuck you. If you think you can handle it so far, we'll slip upstairs to a room and make sure you're telling the truth about the tats. Then we'll start the negotiations."
"I swear to God, I'm telling you the truth. Can we negotiate, first, please?"
He watched her steadily, his frown becoming more pronounced. "All right. Against my better judgment, and because you're young, I'm going to let you have this one."
Her shoulders sagged in relief. And then stiffened again just as quickly as he spoke.
"Lift up your shirt."
"What?"
"It's dark in here, for now, just lift up your shirt and let me see your torso."
Jessica looked around at the darkened interior of the room. A few people sat at the bar, but he was right, no one else was around and no one was paying any attention to them. She reached down and lifted her shirt until it was scrunched around her bra. Her jeans were very low-rise and her white skin was on full display. His eyes left hers and slowly slid down, past where her arms held the bunched up material over her breasts, and then down until he was seeing her naked skin.
He cleared his throat. "That's fine for now."
She dropped the shirt and defiantly, reached across the table and lifted his drink and took a huge gulp. She slammed it back down in front of him and raised her eyes to his. Great. Now she was becoming an alcoholic.
One side of his mouth quirked at her actions as his eyes ran up and down her torso with a heated gaze. "How much do you want from this deal, Jessica?"
"Money-wise?"
"Yes."
She licked her lips. "I thought I'd take this a semester at a time. Tuition, room and board."
He studied her intently for a moment before stating unequivocally, "Your negotiating skills suck."
"What?"
"You're cutting yourself short. It wasn't all that long ago that I was going to school. I know how much it costs. Tuition, books, living expenses, you're looking at what, ten, twelve a semester?"
"Yes."
"Cutting yourself short. You even know what the going rate is for this kind of arrangement?"
She shook her head.
"Three grand a month. Half a year, right there you're looking at eighteen grand."
"I don't want more."
"Taking more won't make this any worse than it already is."
"Yes, it will."
"No, I promise you, it won't. Half a year is probably about the time limit on the deal anyway. You plan right, you save your money, you could have the spring semester paid without having to do something like this again."
He had a point there. "How much then? Three grand a month? I need at least enough for tuition and books up front--well, I need it by August."
"That's not a problem."
Jessica took a moment to think. Three grand a month was the going rate? If she multiplied that by the six months he had mentioned, it would pay basically one and a half semesters of school. She had four more semesters to go. If she could get all this unpleasantness over in six months but make enough to pay two semesters, that would be beyond amazing. It would also give her time to figure out her final year of school. She could improve her GPA, and maybe get enough in private scholarship money to pay for her fourth year.
Twenty-four thousand divided
by six months equaled four grand a month. He'd already intimated he was willing to pay the going rate, so maybe she could get him to go four grand a month. Jessica focused on all these things, the business side of the arrangement, and not on the actuality of it. Going over the numbers in her mind, she went for it. "Four grand a month, that will put a roof over my head and let me save enough over the summer to pay tuition in the fall and then again in the spring."
"Done."
His voice was strong and adamant and astonishment that he'd agreed so quickly surprised her. "Really?" Crap, crap, crap. This was moving forward and she didn't know if she wanted to go forward. She did, but she didn't.
"As long as you agree to what I want," he said.
Her lips tightened. "I know what you want . . . sex."
"There's a little more to it than that. You have to have a complete health check-up, which I'll pay for. That will include a drug test as well. I won't tolerate drugs of any kind, so I'm talking about a hair follicle test, not a simple urine test. If you know you're guilty of drug use already, save us both the time and effort this will take and admit it now." He watched her closely and she shook her head softly. At her denial, he continued, "I'm going to have a background check done on you as well. In addition to those requirements, you'll also have to agree to live where I want you to live, but I'll be reasonable and make it close to campus."
She let the background check and health-screening pass over her. That was practically a given. "I can't live on campus?"
"No."
"Why?"
His face became even more remote as he retaliated immediately. "Where would I fuck you, Jessica? We need a private place."
Before she could stop herself, she closed her eyes tightly against his bluntness and the truth of what she was contemplating. He obviously didn't care for her reaction because his hand reached out and he grabbed her chin. "Open your eyes."
She did as he said and found him staring straight at her.
"We're going to fuck, Jessica." His words were short and clipped and his eyes held hers captive. "Say it."
She swallowed and tried her best. "Yes, we are."
His fingers pinched angrily into her chin. "I don't think you get it yet."
She took a shuddering breath. "I do."
"Then say it," he demanded.
She closed her eyes in distress again, and when she did it, he released her chin and stood to his feet. "We're done here. Nice meeting you."
Before she could let herself think, she reached out and grabbed his hand. He stalled and stood looking down at her, waiting, a tic beating heavily in his cheek.
She took a slow, deep breath, and let it out again. She was going to be a geologist. "We're going to fuck."
As she looked up at him, his cheeks reddened and his nostrils flared as his eyes detailed her face. "And you're not going to fuck anybody else," he demanded at once.
Jessica was a quick learner and didn't make the same mistake twice. He very obviously didn't care for it when she flinched. She held his eyes and repeated, "I'm not going to fuck anybody else." She made her voice strong as she said it, but she didn't think about what she was saying. She thought about a framed diploma, she thought about getting to travel to Antarctica, she thought about rocks and minerals and the formation of the Earth through billions of years of galactic history.
His hand clenched under hers, but he turned and sat back down. "You understand what I mean when I say you won't fuck anyone else?"
"Yes, I think it's self-explanatory."
"It means you won't have a boyfriend. Do you have one now?" His teeth gritted as he asked that question.
"No, I don't."
"Good. You can't have one. No boyfriends, no dates, no platonic relationships with men that can be misconstrued. If I'm paying you, then I own your sex life. All of it."
"Okay."
"I'll set you up in an apartment. I'm guessing you have no furniture?"
Was her state of poverty so apparent then? "No, I don't."
"Fine. I'll arrange for a furnished apartment. It will be easier that way."
"It will be on the bus route? I don't have a vehicle, I need it to be close to campus." He'd already said he'd allow that, but she needed to make sure.
"Not a problem."
Jessica steeled her nerves and asked another question, "How often?"
"How often, what?"
She caught herself just before she closed her eyes against what she was about to have to say. "How often do you think you'll want to have sex?"
Long seconds ticked by as he stared into her eyes and Jessica had the sinking feeling that he wasn't going to let her get away with the question without using more graphic terminology. She held her breath, preparing to say that word he kept forcing her to use. But finally, he exhaled and answered, "A lot. You'll be earning your money. Often and whenever I want it."
"Except when I have to be in class."
"Yes. I realize that you have a life, just as I have my own life. This relationship is meant to make both of our lives easier, not more difficult."
She studied him while a horrible thought crossed her mind. His profile said he was single, but men had been known to lie. "You're not married, are you?"
His expression blackened and his eyes became obdurate as a chill came over his features. "No."
Thank God for that. And then another niggling concern began poking at her so much she had to know. "I need to ask--I need to tell you something else."
"What is it?"
"I won't be passed around like a . . . " She tried to think of a comparison in male language. " . . . like a power tool. You're buying . . . the pleasure of my company, but I won't be shared with your friends."
He watched her steadily for several seconds. Just long enough to send panic bleeding through her. Finally he answered her, slowly and succinctly. "What was it about not fucking anybody else that you didn't understand?"
His impatient question sent a ribbon of relief sliding through her. "So, you agree?"
"I agree."
She spelled it out further for him. "No threesomes. No orgies."
"Agreed."
Connor stared at her steadily from across the table. It sent a trickle of molten heat through her when she thought about what he wanted to do to her. Panic and heat. He was incredibly handsome, staring at her like that, thinking about having sex with her. Very handsome, very scary.
His silence continued.
A blush stole over her face, she could feel her cheeks getting hot as the picture of their naked bodies entwined wrapped around her brain and wouldn't let go. She could feel his scorching sexual magnetism blasting her from across the table as he looked her over. She began drawing oxygen in so quickly that she was almost hyperventilating.
"Calm down, Jessica. The deal we're making won't hurt, I promise. No force, no pain of any kind."
The deal they were making. Not the deal they were trying to make. And instead of comforting her, the word force almost knocked the breath from her. "Are you planning on trying to force me to do anything?" She took three rapid breaths, trying to calm her nerves.
"No, not the way you're thinking, not the way that has you so panicked."
"What--what other way is there?"
His eyes lowered to her lips and then to her throat where his gaze stalled briefly before sliding down to her chest. He raised his eyes back to hers. "Haven't you ever . . . played before?"
Played before? What the hell did that mean? "I don't think so."
"I think you'd know if you had."
"Okay, I haven't."
"But you're not opposed to giving it a try?"
She breathed out a deep sigh as they found themselves back in a big circle. "As long as you don't expect me to do anything with anyone else, and as long as you don't force me to do something, I'll consider anything."
His hands landed on the table as if to shove himself to his feet. "Let's get a room."
Her heart began to hammer triple ti
me. "Just to see my lack of ink, right?"
"Yes. We're not fucking until you get a clean bill of health."
"I don't have any tattoos. Please don't make me do this."
"It's not up for debate. Upstairs."
She stood slowly to her feet and followed him out of the entrance of the bar and over to the front desk. She hung back while he secured a room.
Within minutes, she was riding the elevator up beside him and standing back while he slipped the key card into a door and stood holding it open for her.
The room was nice but basic. As she walked in, there was a bathroom on the right. The room contained two queen-sized beds and a desk with a writing chair and a bureau adjacent to the desk. There was a flat screen television mounted above it. In the far corner of the room sat a comfortable looking armchair with a small side table next to it.
That's where he headed after securing the lock on the door and tossing the room card on the desk. Jessica heard the sibilant hiss of the bolt hitting home as the sound echoed in her ears. She stood completely still as he crossed the room and sprawled in the chair, crossing one booted foot over his knee, and made himself comfortable.
Jessica stood awkwardly between the desk and the foot of the bed closest to the door and farthest away from him. Her insides quaked as she attempted to blank her mind of all thought.
She looked around the room, at the hotel-like artwork on the walls, the air-conditioning unit on the floor in front of the shaded windows. She looked anywhere but at him.
He let out a deep sigh and gave her a verbal nudge. "Now would be a good time."
Her eyes flew to his. "I'm not comfortable with this. I've already shown you my stomach." She turned around and presented him with her back. She lifted her shirt above her bra strap and faced in the opposite direction, her eyes clinging to the door. "There. Not one tattoo. Where else would I have any?" She shoved her shirt back down and turned back to face him.
He stood up and pulled his wallet from his back pocket and flipped it open. "I suppose we should establish how this relationship will be from the very first moment. I want something from you, I pay for it and you supply it." He glanced over at her. "How much will your books cost in the fall?"
"Around seven hundred," she answered softly, hesitantly. It was seven hundred she hadn't had last semester and an added handicap for her. Every time she'd needed a book, she'd had to beg, borrow, or steal one. She hadn't really thought about stealing a book, though. Stealing someone else's book would have hurt them. But more often than not, borrowing had only worked out about half the time.