by Linda Ford
There wasn’t a doubt in her mind that He had carried them safely on the journey from Rocky Creek, Montana, through a snowstorm and bitter cold. God had protected Louise and baby Chloe from Vic, who’d thought he owned them and Missy. She shivered at the memory of how Vic had treated her, trying to get her alone, and when he did, pressing against her in corners. Then he’d moved into the Porter house and both Missy and Louise knew he’d be taking advantage of the situation. So they’d fled to Eden Valley Ranch.
Never again would Missy allow herself to be made to feel she was an unwelcome burden. No more having others tell her what to do and what not to do, where to go and when and how. No, she had plans that would prevent that.
Before her, the newcomer named Wade tipped his head, breaking into her thoughts. “Nice to make your acquaintance, miss.”
She knew she wasn’t mistaken in hearing a mocking tone in his words. Hopefully, the others didn’t notice. She tipped her head in response. “Likewise, I’m sure.”
A flicker of his eyelids informed her he understood her silent message that she was as thrilled as he to be forced to spend Christmas together. Which was not at all.
She turned her attention to the children, wanting to let them know she understood how alone and afraid they were at the moment. “I, too, lost my mama and papa when I was a child.”
“What happened to them?” Annie asked, her eyes big with curiosity.
“There was an accident.”
The children nodded solemnly.
Joey released a long sigh that ended in a shudder. “Our mama and papa got sick and died.” He studied her. “When did yours die?”
“Four years ago.” Four and a half and a bit. She used to count the months and weeks and days, but had stopped doing that. Nothing would make her forget them but she had to face the future.
Missy rested her hand over the pocket that contained a piece of paper. She did not need to see it to know what it said.
Miss Evans offers young ladies the opportunity to become self-sufficient and earn twice the salary of a public schoolteacher. You’ll learn how to operate a typewriter. Become a secretary and you will be able to get a job anywhere.
Missy had sent in a deposit from the coins she’d been saving for her future. The next class was to begin in March in Toronto, which left her three months to earn the rest of the cost of tuition.
She allowed the tiniest smile to curve her mouth. She’d soon be independent. Her future would be in her hands, not in the hands of others. A shiver trickled down her spine. Like these children, she knew how it felt to lose important people in her life. It was best to be on her own. That way she wouldn’t have to deal with the pain of losing anyone else.
“Ours died a little time ago.” Tears rushed to Joey’s eyes.
These children needed so much care and tenderness at the moment. Turning her gaze back to Wade, Missy felt her smile flatten, her lips curl downward. He had made it clear he didn’t want these children. Perhaps he was sending them to relatives—kinder, more loving people. She certainly hoped so.
Annie rocked forward, seeking her attention.
“What is it, child?” Missy asked.
“Did you have Christmas without your mama and papa?”
Missy knew what the child meant. “I missed them terribly. I still do. But I know they would want me to be happy, especially at Christmas.”
Annie nodded, satisfied with the answer. “I think so, too.”
Wade took his niece’s hand. “Come along, Annie. You shouldn’t bother the lady.”
Missy’s insides curled at the way Wade made it sound as if she didn’t welcome Annie’s questions. Ignoring his warning glance, she brushed her hand over the girl’s shoulder. “You’re not a bother to me.”
Right then and there, she promised herself she would do everything in her power to make this a Christmas Day these children would remember with joy.
* * *
The only place left for Wade to sit was next to Missy. He almost refused Linette’s invitation to be seated, but he had asked to be included in their Christmas. Seemed it meant enduring Missy’s narrow-eyed looks. He plunked onto the chair and pulled Annie to his lap. Joey sat on the floor in front of him, watching the other children playing.
Annie turned to regard Missy. “You live here?”
“I’m only visiting. Louise is my sister-in-law.” She pointed out a young woman with a tiny baby in her arms and a man hovering adoringly at her side. “She and Nate are going to live at his ranch as soon as he fixes the cabin.”
Wade fleetingly wondered if Missy would be living with them.
Annie reached out and fingered the fabric of Missy’s dress. “I like your gown. It feels nice.”
“It’s satin. Royal blue was my mama’s favorite color. I like to wear it and remember her.”
Annie leaned forward. “Mama’s favorite color was pink. I like pink, too. Maybe I’ll get a pink dress when I get big. I gots a pink sweater she knitted me. It’s my favorite thing.”
It was the most Annie had talked since her parents died. Before that she had been a regular chatterbox.
She turned to Wade. “Where’s my pink sweater?”
He had no idea. The neighboring women had helped him pack up the children’s things. “I expect it’s in one of your bags.”
“In the wagon?”
“Yes. Everything is under a tarp.” He wanted to reassure her that her belongings were safe.
“Oh.” The one syllable was both a question and a demand.
“We’ll find it later.”
“Oh.” Disappointment and reluctant patience colored her voice. How could a little girl pack so much meaning into one small word? But Annie had always been good at letting her feelings be known.
She turned back to Missy. “If you don’t live here, where do you live?”
Even though they didn’t touch and he didn’t look directly at her, Wade felt the young woman stiffen. Why did such an ordinary question cause such a reaction?
“I’m staying here for now. And then...well, I’ll find something else.” Beneath the cheerful words ran a river of uncertainty that made Wade tighten his arms around Annie lest she feel it, too.
But he couldn’t prevent the child’s understanding. “That’s like us. We’re going someplace but I don’t know where. Only that Uncle Wade is leaving us and going...” She lifted her hands in a dramatic show of I-don’t-know.
The gesture made him ache. As did her words. If only he could give them specifics as to their future, but at this point, he had none to give. Please, God. Make their adoption work out. Sooner would be better than later.
Missy shifted slightly so she could give him an accusing look. He ignored her, gazing down at the floor. She needn’t think he acted selfishly. He had to do what was best.
Linette broke the tension as she announced her departure. “I need to go finish the meal preparations.” She put baby Jonathan in his cradle and headed for the kitchen. Immediately, the other ladies, including Missy, exited the room. Wade drew in a deep breath. The delicious aromas that had assaulted him as he entered the house now drew saliva from his mouth and growls from his stomach. The smells made it difficult to focus on anything else, until he felt Annie get up and start to follow Missy. Wade roped in his attention. “Stay here,” he said.
Missy turned, favored him with another of her accusing looks and continued on her way. Wade let her go without comment, deeming this a battle not worth fighting. Right or wrong, the woman was entitled to her opinion.
For the first time since he’d seen Missy in the room he sat back and tried to relax. But the smells of turkey and stuffing, ham and mincemeat made him miss Susan so badly he felt a sting of tears. Thankfully, all the other men had their attention on Eddie as he regaled them with a story about findin
g stranded cows in a snowstorm.
Wade’s stomach was kissing his backbone by the time Linette invited them into the dining room. “Children, you have a table in the kitchen. Daisy’s in charge. Be sure you mind her.”
The older girl, Daisy, who looked to be about thirteen, had a toddler perched on one hip and reached out her free hand to Annie. “Come on. It’s fun to sit at the children’s table.”
“Daisy is very good at minding the younger ones,” Linette assured Wade. “She’s Cassie and Roper’s oldest. With two brothers and a sister, she gets a lot of practice.”
The little boy named Grady signaled to Joey. “You wanna sit with me?”
And as easy as that, the two clinging children left Wade.
He wanted to call them back, but Linette waved everyone to chairs.
Somehow Wade ended up beside Missy. A glance around the table revealed they were the only single adults present, so he supposed it made sense to his hostess.
He forced himself to sit calmly as Eddie said grace, even though having Missy so close made his nerves tingle. He tried to cover it up by squirming about in an attempt to see or at least hear the children.
“Relax,” Missy said. “If Linette says it’s okay it’s okay.”
He nodded, though he wasn’t sure he agreed.
Linette spoke from the end of the table. “You couldn’t know it, but Daisy and her brothers and sister were orphans. Roper and Cassie adopted them. In fact—” she glanced about the table “—all these people have children who lost at least one parent.” She guided the passing of the food as she spoke.
Louise sat on the other side of Missy and leaned around her to speak to Wade. “Even little Chloe. Her father never had a chance to meet her. Now Nate is her father.”
The couples around the table smiled lovingly at each other, obviously content with their new relationships.
Wade filled his plate with turkey and stuffing, ham and green tomato chutney, mashed potatoes and gravy, carrots and turnips. He realized all eyes were on him. Had he taken too much food? But a glance about the table revealed every plate held a generous amount.
“Did I miss something?” he asked, silently acknowledging he had been interested only in the food.
Everyone slid their gaze to Missy and back to him.
“It seems like marriage would be the perfect solution for you, as well,” Linette said. “Both of you.”
He shook his head. “Oh, no. Marriage isn’t for me.”
Missy held up her hands. “Nor me.”
“Why not?” Louise demanded of her sister-in-law. “What’s wrong with marriage?”
“I didn’t say there was anything wrong with it. It’s fine if that’s what you want. I have other plans.” She dug into the pocket of her blue satin gown and pulled out a piece of paper. She unfolded it and showed it to Louise, who read it aloud, then stared at her.
“A secretary?”
“Using a typewriter.” Missy made it sound as if that made a world of difference.
“Where will you get the money to take this class?”
“I’ll earn it.” Her voice rang with determination.
“But—”
Before Louise could finish, Missy returned the paper to her pocket. “That’s what I’m going to do.”
Wade released pent-up air. Thankfully, there’d be no more matchmaking.
Every pair of eyes returned to him.
“I’m sure there are other prospects,” Linette began. “I heard a family moved in this fall with an almost grown daughter. I haven’t met her yet but by all accounts she is pleasant and hardworking.”
This must be the family Lane had gone to visit. Wade rolled his head back and forth. Even if he had any interest in marriage, the last thing he needed was a young woman barely old enough to leave her parents. Besides, Lane had his sights set on the young lady and Wade had no intention of being competition. “Marriage isn’t for everyone. And to provide for a family, a man needs a home. I have none. I’m a cowboy.”
“Look around the table,” Eddie said. “These fellows were homeless cowboys, too, until they found a reason to settle down.”
The conversation was thankfully dropped as people turned their attention to the bountiful food. Wade savored every mouthful even though the meal carried sorrowful memories of similar occasions spent with Susan and her family. But as Missy had said to Annie, his sister would want him to enjoy the day.
Beneath the rumble of a discussion about the new church, Missy murmured, “One would think two orphaned children would be enough reason to settle down.”
So much for thinking the topic had been abandoned.
Wade’s enjoyment of the meal turned sour.
Linette lowered her fork to the table. “Tell me, Wade, what are your plans for the children?”
He, too, lowered his fork, knowing his answer would bring more criticism from Missy. Not that it was any of her business. “Ma’am, I’ve been in contact with a Mr. and Mrs. Bauer from Fort Macleod regarding adoption.”
A collective gasp came from others at the table.
“I had hoped to hear from them by now because I have to leave almost immediately. I’ve agreed to look after a friend’s ranch while he takes a trip.”
A beat of silence passed before anyone responded.
It was Missy who spoke. “I guess you’ll have to take the children with you.” Obviously she knew that wasn’t his plan, but she meant to force him to reconsider.
“That’s not possible. I can’t take care of them and the ranch, too.” Before Missy could voice any more disapproval, before any of them could, he spoke again. “I need someplace safe to leave them until the couple comes. I hope...hoped they could stay here.”
Linette and Eddie looked at each other for a moment. Eddie answered Wade’s request. “We’ll discuss it later.”
With those words, he had to be content, though he could not relax with Missy’s heavy disapproval coming off her like a wave.
The main part of the meal ended, the dishes were cleared away and mincemeat pie served. Wade hoped the children were enjoying the dessert more than he was. Every mouthful was full of regret from his own heart and silent accusations from Missy.
Finally the meal was over.
“Everyone return to the sitting room. There are gifts for all the children,” Linette said.
Wade had begun to rise, but at that he sank back in his chair. He must find a way to draw Joey and Annie away so they wouldn’t be disappointed when they received no gifts.
Linette waved a hand to indicate he should join them. “There’s something for Annie and Joey, too.”
Missy waited at her chair as if to make certain he didn’t skip out.
He had no such intention and rose to follow her back to the other room. In a flash he saw that everyone had resumed their previous positions, which left him sitting at Missy’s side. He would have avoided the seat, but the room was crowded and he had no other option.
The children raced in and sat in a circle before the decorated evergreen tree next to the window.
One by one, Eddie handed gifts to the young ones. When it was his turn, Joey opened his package. “A ball for playing catch. Papa taught me to throw and catch.” He gazed at it, his lips quivering.
Wade would have gone to him, but wondered if the boy would find it embarrassing to be needing comfort.
Annie opened her gift, a sock doll with black button eyes, brown yarn hair and a pink cotton dress.
She stared at it and burst into tears.
Wade sat motionless, his heart shredding with shared sorrow. Before he could move, Missy sprang forward, sat beside the child and pulled her to her lap. “Shh, shh.” She rocked Annie in a tight embrace.
Finally the tears stopped. Missy returned to he
r chair, with Annie clinging to her like a sweater.
“I’ll take her.” Wade reached for his niece, but Missy shook her head.
“She’s fine here on my lap.” Missy’s eyes, too, were awash with tears.
Wade closed his eyes against a rush of wild emotions—a burning desire to comfort them both, a burst of fresh pain at his own sorrow and beneath it all, his unending sense of failure in not being able to give these children what they needed. And in not having seen how sad and desperate his late wife had been. The accusations hurled at him by Tomasina’s parents that it was his duty to see to her needs were no stronger than those from his own heart.
He never again wanted to experience such failure.
* * *
Missy held Annie as tightly as Annie held her. How well she remembered the first Christmas after her parents had died. The aching feeling that nothing would ever be the same, that no one would ever understand and love her the way Mama and Papa had. She and Gordie had gotten presents for each other—she’d bought him a new pocketknife she’d seen him admire in the store and he’d bought her a set of ivory hair combs. She hadn’t noticed them in any of the stores and wondered where he’d gotten them. It was much later that she realized he’d probably stolen them, and she’d never again used them.
She shook off the memories and flicked her gaze to the man beside her. She noted that his hands were curled so tightly the knuckles were white. From under her lashes Missy studied him. His expression revealed a mixture of emotions—uncertainty and sorrow.
He’d lost his sister. Of course he felt sorrow.
In her judgment of him she’d forgotten to take that into account. At the first opportunity she would correct the matter.
Annie cuddled close as the other children played with their new toys. After a bit, Joey left the others and scooted over to sit with his back against Wade’s legs. Wade rested his hands on the boy’s shoulders.
Missy smiled as uncle and nephew released tiny sighs and sank toward each other, giving comfort and consolation.