I wiped a tear off my face. I felt movement behind me, and I looked to see Alice’s black eyes watching me. I’d told her a lot, but I hadn’t told her this part of the story.
“So I got out of prison. I didn’t yet know about Juliette and Ricky. He was gone. Sam was dead. I got released. It all happened so fast. I started working for one of my old man’s buddies, who had an industrial HVAC repair biz. But I could tell, I suspected something was off with Juliette. Anyone whose ever been cheated on will tell you the same thing afterwards. Maybe they didn’t know know. But deep inside, there was that feeling, that sixth sense. That little voice that told you something wasn’t right.
“So we started to drift, Juliette and me. And that made me scared. If we divorced or separated, then I’d never get to see Molly again. She was my kid. She was five now, pushing six. So I told Juliette I wanted to adopt her. Officially adopt her. And that’s when Juliette told me. She broke down in tears and told me everything.”
Alice made her purring noise, and I leaned back against her, still wrapped up in Gretchen’s arms.
“I told her it didn’t matter. I loved her, and I loved Molly. I wanted to go through with it, and she said okay. But here’s the thing with adoptions. You can’t just adopt a kid if she has another, living dad on the birth certificate. You need his consent. We needed to find Ricky and get him to sign away his parental rights. I figured this would be easy, right? He’d been ducking out on child support for six years now. Through his mom we found him in Boston, had him served with papers asking him to give up his rights in exchange for nullifying all the back child support. He’d have been free.”
I felt myself tense up, the anger rising. “You know what that fucker did? He came back to Pittsburgh, and he got himself a lawyer, and he sued for custody of Molly. Bam, out of nowhere. Said in his papers that his daughter’s mom was married to a felon and that it wasn’t safe for his child to be around someone like me.”
“Oh, Popper. What did you do?” Gretchen asked.
“I found him, and I beat the fuck out of him. I beat him within an inch of his damn life. I busted both of his eye sockets, all the fingers on his right hand, and he fucked-up his elbow, too. I did it at his parent’s house, and I did it in front of his mom.” I felt my fists clenching at the memory. My fingers ached with phantom pain. I’d never been violent in my life, and it had burst out, all at once. The Hobgoblin Riot was free. It was only because of the crying of Ricky’s mom had I stopped.
“So I was arrested again, and this time I was facing an attempted manslaughter charge. The adoption was out the window. But funny enough, Ricky dropped the suit. He went back to Boston or wherever. I’d fucked him up pretty bad. They said I’d used a pipe wrench on him, but I don’t remember that part. I ended up pleading guilty to first degree aggravated assault and was given 15 years in prison.”
“And that’s when they recruited you?”
I nodded. “A few years later. They plucked me right out of prison. I have no idea why. But anyway, you said I was a jerk to send Jonah away like that. I was. But that’s my thing. I do stupid shit when I’m trying to protect those who I love.”
Gretchen leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek. “I understand. But if you ever try to banish me, I’ll be the one breaking someone’s eye sockets and fingers.”
I grinned. “And don’t forget the elbow. Oh yeah, his front two teeth, too.”
She laughed. I laughed, but it was a fake one. I felt it there, awakened deep inside of me, like I summoned it. That rage. My own personal Hobgoblin Riot living inside of me.
Fucking Ricky, I thought.
Popper Note 25
The moment the sun crested over the city, we popped open all the cages of the Menagerie. We had 13 hours until wave five.
The pong flies were a loss. We had plenty of them in backup traps and didn’t bother trying to recapture them. I had a young fire mage, a nervous moon auric named Shin smash the interior of their cage with a fireball the moment it opened, incinerating them. A few survived, but they were only dangerous when they swarmed. We ignored them as we grappled with the rest.
In order to Pokémon the other beasts back into their traps, they had to be injured first. That was a problem. With the tormented dwarves, the moles, and the peluda, the strategy was the same. We had multiple traps set up around the exit of their cages, each set to open in sequence so there was always an open trap, and we didn’t have to worry too much about timing. We’d pump arrows or spells into them until they were injured enough to get sucked into the traps.
That worked for the tormented, the moles, and the fire peluda. The lizard-like lightning peluda blasted the traps with their electrical discharge skill, causing the traps to scatter. One trap rolled wide while it was open, knocking a white jacket and his mount over. It had startled the horse so much it fell onto its leg. Screaming, the horse was promptly sucked into the trap.
Meanwhile, Gretchen was on ogre duty, and I’d somehow ended up on team capture the pazuzu. There were five of the pissed-off demons. I stood on the ground, Alice to my left. I was to whack them with Battlefield Surgeon if they got too close, and Alice would slam them back toward the traps. They flew at us the moment the cages opened, screaming and clawing and scary as fuck. I had arrows going at their leathery, bat-like wings, and three of the five were stopped in seconds. Two broke past the traps and were on us.
Alice took a scorpion tail hit to the shoulder, and she immediately fell over, convulsing while I screamed for a healer. I sliced with my axe, nicking the foot of a pazuzu as it screeched and flew into the air. Alice was hit with an antidote and a healing spell. The spells came soon enough, but it still felt like it’d taken too long. I’d gotten used to Tiatha’s rapid-fire healing. I missed her.
Alice whimpered as she got back to her feet. “That hurt,” she said. “I don’t like being poisoned.”
One of the pazuzu was down, skewered by arrows. It was dead. Damnit. The last flew to the ceiling of the Menagerie, screaming at us. It scrabbled at the ceiling with its claws, but it wouldn’t be able to get away.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Gretchen jabbing at a massive ogre with her spear. “Get in there!” she cried as she poked at it. It roared and grabbed the haft of her spear, causing her eyes to go wide. She growled and pressed forward, skewering the monster in the stomach. It cried and fell to its knees. Blood started coming from the ogre’s mouth. Another loss.
On the other side, Colonel Holder and Oliver the beastmaster tried to box in the oblivion Walrus, who shouted and honked at them, slamming its bulk up and down on the ground like someone slamming a shoe.
The pazuzu swept down, snatching up one of the white jackets trying to corral the lightning peluda. The demon tore the white jacket in half, spraying blood everywhere. Jesus.
I growled. “Take it out,” I said to the mage to my right. The air mage hit it with a Shred spell, and the beast fell from the air. It cracked and crumpled as it hit the ground.
The others managed to get the remaining peluda trapped. I quickly looked around. The monsters were either all recaptured or dead. Too many dead, including an ogre and two pazuzu. Damn.
The oblivion walrus was also going to be a loss. The only way in was to be swallowed. The only way out was to be vomited. For all we knew there was another world the size of Texas inside the walrus, and we didn’t have time for that bullshit. So we opted for the quicker, alternative method of walrus extraction. A cut down the center of the belly.
Gretchen had wanted to capture the monster and to move it back to Castle Four for the extraction, but we didn’t have time. Plus, Castle Four had a giant hole in it. We hadn’t had time or the inclination to get it fixed.
“Granger,” I said, pointing at the walrus, who still fought the white jackets.
Thwang! The arrow shot from over my shoulder, burying itself shaft-deep into the walrus’s eye. It bellowed in rage. Granger shot again. He’d aimed for the other eye, but he missed. The arrow explod
ed against the tough skull. The walrus screamed and turned to face us, looking over the white jackets. Its one good eye focused on me, and it bellowed. It flew at us, rising up like a massive hand. It swept three white jackets away as it charged, ready to slap me into a damn pancake.
Its head snapped back as the third arrow slammed into its good eye.
The walrus shuddered, and it flopped over, crashing with the sound of a water-filled sack. I stood next to Granger, my heart pounding. I eyed the massive, dead walrus. Its stomach vibrated ominously. Colonel Holder ordered the corpse surrounded, as a white jacket hesitantly strode forward, knife in hand. The soldier would cut down the center, and according to Gretchen, all the living creatures in the Walrus’s stomach would come out at once. I hoped we weren’t about to unleash another hundred pazuzu on us or some crazy shit like that.
“Such a shame,” Granger said. “About Bingo, I mean. I’d never known a better warrior.”
“Yeah,” I said. He’d saved my ass. I didn’t know if I was ever going back to Harmony. If I was, I knew I’d have to visit him in the coliseum if he was still there and thank him.
Gretchen came to stand next to us. “Be ready,” she said.
The soldier cut lengthwise down the center of the giant walrus. Skin and muscle separated, unzipped by the knife. White, pulsating light emanated from the wound. The soldier jumped back as three forms oozed out, like they were being born.
We waited for more, but that’s all there was.
“Really?” Gretchen said, looking at the three figures as they stood up. She sounded disgusted. The two taller figures shook their hands, whipping the goo away. The third, smaller form was more hesitant to stand. He did finally stand, however, on uncertain, wobbly legs.
Chief Musa of the Hobgoblin Riot. He had no guards, just two, very young, very female hobgoblin companions. The women hobgoblins looked terrified. The chief appeared to be oblivious to his surroundings.
“What?” I asked Gretchen.
She indicated the two women hobgoblins. “After all these years of progress, after all the work they put into this game, after all the meticulous attention to detail and realism they put into everything, why is that they still make the female versions of monsters like that?”
“Like what?” I asked. I looked at the hobgoblins and didn’t see a problem. Each one was young and kinda sexy in a weird way. They were still green, though not as hairy and way thinner than the male hobgoblins. They looked a lot more human than the men did. “Their world was ending, and the hobgoblin king went into hiding with two young hotties. I don’t see what the problem is.”
Gretchen shook her head and made an exasperated sound as the white jackets moved forward. They quickly took custody of the three hobgoblins, who offered no resistance.
“Want me to stick these two back into a cage?” Oliver asked, indicating the companion hobgoblins.
“No,” I said. “Set them free. We don’t need them.”
I didn’t have to say it twice. The two women ran off, disappearing into the city.
“Oliver, get the Menagerie back in order as fast as you can,” I said. “We don’t have any time to waste. I don’t want any empty cages. In fact, why don’t you put that mean-ass scorpion mount in here since nobody is using it.”
Alice gasped, and Oliver looked at me like I’d just asked out his grandmother.
“You can’t stick Rita in a cage!” Alice cried, aghast.
The last time I’d been down to the stables, “Rita” had practically ripped the paddock apart to get at me, hissing and snapping.
“Don’t worry,” Oliver said. “I got something from my personal stock we can throw in there.”
“What is it?” Gretchen asked.
“A pair of adnoartina from my homeland. Breeding pair. I got some good eggs, so I guess I can sacrifice mum and dad for the war effort. They’re a surly pair.”
“What the hell are they?” I asked.
“Reptilians,” Gretchen said. “But bigger and more Australian.”
They wouldn’t be as good as the walrus, but that would have to do. When wave five happened, we’d still have an empty cage or two, but we simply didn’t have the time to get more.
“Where is my son?” Chief Musa asked. The ancient, emaciated hobgoblin appeared to be older than even the withered thing that lived in the church. He was in no condition to walk, and we put him on the back of a white jacket’s horse.
“Kankan is dead,” Gretchen said, looking up at the horse. “Maghan is across the ocean. He’s currently besieging Harmony. He’s going to fail. We’re taking you to the queen of the wark-ee.”
“Kankan,” the man said, his voice full of wonder. “That’s what Frinda wanted to name our son. I told her only if we had two.”
“Great,” I said. “He’s gone bonkers.”
“Come on,” Gretchen said. “It doesn’t matter. We need to get to the Artisan Guild.”
We hurried down the winding streets toward Castle Six. The frail hobgoblin babbled the entire time, making very little sense. Some of his words, however, had a disconcerting ring of self-awareness.
“I killed her. Smashed her head against the kiln, and the blood went everywhere. Frinda. I don’t know why I did it. I remember doing it. But I remember something else. I remember not doing it. I remember loving her. I killed my own father. Chief Ichichi. He wanted to kill us all, to attack. Sometimes we’d feast, when the warriors came. That was my favorite. Those were always good days.”
“It’s like he’s been hit with Insanity,” I said. I was starting to feel bad about handing him over to the bird lady. What was she going to do with him?
“His mind is lost,” Granger said. “I’ve seen it before. It happens a lot to those who fight in the arena. Dying every day, waking up, knowing it’s going to happen again. Sometimes they start to babble like this. Usually when they do, they just disappear. The next morning, a new monster has appeared in their place.”
I shared an uncertain look with Gretchen. The last thing we needed was Chief Musa disappearing.
We didn’t need to go all the way to the Artisan Guild. The queen and her male consort waited for us in the marble pavilion in front of Castle Six.
“Here he is,” Gretchen said as the white jackets bodily pulled him off his horse and threw him down at the feet of the wark-ee. Despite his smallness, he was still larger than the bird-like humanoid.
The queen made a sound that was something like a sigh.
“Very well,” she said. She turned away and started hopping back toward the entrance of the castle. Her male companion cocked his head to the side, made a burbling noise and then hopped off toward the queen.
“Wait,” Gretchen called. “Where are you going? What’s happening?”
“Leave him there,” the queen said. “I have not forgotten our deal. Meet me back here as the sun sets, and I will cast my spell for you.”
“Wait,” I said. “When the sun sets? We need you now.”
“My spell won’t work in the sunlight,” she called. “It’s a psionicist spell. It requires moon magic to work.”
“Well, fuck,” I said, looking at Gretchen. We should’ve done this last night. The wave would start just after sunset, and Jonah’s plan required us to get to Sandra as soon as possible.
“What about Chief Musa!” Gretchen called to the queen, who was about to disappear into the castle.
“They’ll take care of it,” she called, waving over her shoulder.
“Who is she talking about?” I asked, looking around.
“Look,” Granger said, pointing at the alley one street over. Several pairs of red eyes stared back at us. As I looked around, I realized belatedly we were surrounded by hobgoblins, all hiding and lurking in the shadows.
“Oh fuck,” I said, pulling my axe out.
“Their dots are white on the map,” Gretchen said.
Chief Musa’s dot had been red this whole time. It remained that way.
“What does that mea
n?” I asked. I took a step toward Alice. How many were there? It seemed like thousands. “Are they here to rescue their king?”
“I… I don’t think so,” Gretchen said, backing away from Chief Musa.
“If you see Kankan,” Musa muttered, “tell him I’m proud of what he’s become. He thinks I prefer his brother. That is not true. I wanted them both to be strong, but they are so different.”
“Hey buddy,” I said. “It looks like your people have come to talk to you.”
“They starve,” Musa said. “It is a rule. If the people starve, then they are to feed upon their chief.”
“Boss, I’m thinking we best go back to home base,” Granger said.
“I’m thinking you’re right,” I said. I hopped up onto Alice. I waved my arms for everyone to move out.
We set forth back toward Fort Bloodgasm. It didn’t take long for the notification to come.
System Message> Chief Musa of the Hobgoblin Riot has fallen, having been deposed by his own people. Prince Maghan of the Hobgoblin Riot is now Chief Maghan of the Hobgoblin Riot.
His Royal Majesty Jonah: The bird lady didn’t kill him?
Gretchen: No. But you said it wouldn’t matter who killed him as long as he was dead.
Poppy: Jonah, you still underwater? Man, I’m so jealous of that waterbreathing skill.
His Royal Majesty Jonah: Yeah, it’s not that great. I’m still wet, and I’m still cold, despite the Warmth potion. Triple Fang does not like being underwater, either. These things complain more than Alice does.
Poppy: Don’t care. Still jealous.
His Royal Majesty Jonah: Okay guys. Now you just gotta get to Sandra the Learnt, or all of us are fucked. Try to do it as soon as possible.
Poppy: Yeah, about that…
Popper Note 26
I waited outside of Castle Six as the sun set against the western horizon, bathing the city in orange light. The colors reflected off the gargoyle statues of the Gardens, turning them into shadow figures bathed in prismatic halos.
Of Chief Musa, there was no sign except a few wisps of tattered clothing on the marble ground. The hobgoblins had returned to their rooftops, content to wait this out. Their king was dead, and the new dude in charge was a world away.
The Hobgoblin Riot: Dominion of Blades Book 2: A LitRPG Adventure Page 42