by Joanne Fluke
Barbara shook her head as if to say it wasn’t, but then she said, “Patrick was my dad’s name.”
“What else did Mother bring you?” Hannah asked. Except for the inappropriate head shake, Barbara was batting a thousand tonight.
“A purse. It’s over there on the chair. It’s one of my favorites. Nettie Grant gave it to me for Christmas one year.”
Hannah gave a deep sigh of relief. They’d gotten through the ten minutes Doc Knight had allotted to their visit and Barbara had been perfectly rational the whole time. “I’m leaving this for you, Barbara,” she said, placing the bakery box on Barbara’s bedside table. “It’s Monkey Bread.”
“I love Monkey Bread. My mother used to bake it. Does it have chocolate?”
“Yes. I got the recipe from Lisa’s oldest sister.”
“That’s wonderful, Hannah. It’s the same recipe that my mother used. She made it for a baby shower once and . . . and your partner’s sister asked her for the recipe.”
“We’d better go, Hannah.” Norman glanced out into the hallway. “Here comes Barbara’s nurse and she’s probably going to tell us our visiting time is up.”
“Jenny!” Hannah said, recognizing the nurse as she walked into the room.
“That’s it!” Barbara exclaimed. “It’s Jenny!” And then she turned to Jenny to explain, “The last time Hannah was here, I told her your name sounded like money. And it does. Jenny sounds like penny. I said that, didn’t I, Hannah?”
“Yes, you did.” Hannah turned toward Jenny. “You said you were working another shift. Are you Barbara’s nurse tonight?”
“Yes. I’m staying with Barbara in her room. They’re bringing in a cot in a couple of minutes.”
“You’re going to sleep in here?” Barbara asked her.
“That’s right.”
“Oh, good!” Barbara turned to Hannah. “Jenny can help in case the monster comes back.”
Uh-oh! Here we go again! Hannah’s mind formed the words that she wasn’t about to speak aloud.
“What monster is that?” Norman asked in a normal conversational tone of voice.
“The first time I saw it I thought it looked like a big white rat. That’s what I told you, isn’t it, Hannah?”
“Yes, that’s what you told me.”
“Well, I saw it again and this time it looked like a white hunchback seal. The way it moves scares me.”
“It won’t come in while I’m here,” Jenny said.
“I hope not.” Barbara turned to Hannah. “Will you bring . . . the big cat back, Hannah?”
“Of course I’ll bring Moishe back.”
“That makes me feel so much safer. I really don’t like that monster.”
There was silence for a moment. It seemed that none of them knew exactly the right thing to say.
“Of course my brother is a monster, too,” Barbara continued, “even if he doesn’t look like one. He’s a human monster.”
“Your . . . brother?” Hannah managed to ask.
Barbara nodded. “I think he still wants to kill me. He probably thought I’d die jumping off the roof, but I didn’t. If he comes back when there’s nobody here, I’m going to hit him with this!”
Barbara reached out and gripped the bowling trophy tightly. “Dad’s bowling trophy ought to take care of him. It’s heavy enough. The last time he came into my room, I hit him with the water pitcher. It’s too bad it’s made out of plastic. I don’t think it hurt him at all.”
Hannah exchanged glances with Norman. It was time for them to leave. “We’d better go now, Barbara,” she said, reaching out to touch Barbara’s hand. “Enjoy your Monkey Bread.”
“Oh, I will! Goodbye, Hannah. Thank you for baking the Monkey Bread. I’ll share it with . . . Jenny.” She turned to Norman. “Goodbye, my dentist. Thank you for the new teeth because now I can eat that Monkey Bread.”
They could hear Cuddles yowling with excitement as they led Moishe up to Norman’s front door. They’d decided that instead of driving back to Hannah’s condo to take Moishe home and then retracing their steps to go out to the Lake Eden Inn, they’d simply drop him off at Norman’s house so he could play with Cuddles while they dined.
“She knows Moishe’s out here,” Hannah said, greatly amused by the excited squeals that were coming from inside. “I think you’d better get ready to catch her when you open the door. She could run out.”
Norman stuck his key in the lock. “That won’t be a problem. Just lead Moishe inside and she’ll stay right by him.”
Hannah had her doubts, but she did as Norman suggested and Cuddles stuck right by Moishe’s side. They walked in tandem down the hallway and when Hannah took Moishe off the leash, Cuddles immediately initiated a game of chase.
“Careful!” Norman warned, pulling Hannah over to the living room couch. “Sit! Quick! And if they jump, lean forward. Cuddles thinks the back of the couch is a speedway.”
Hannah sat just in time as the two cats raced into the room. She ducked and leaned forward as Cuddles jumped up and Moishe chased her the length of the couch and then down again.
“The coffee table’s next,” Norman informed her. “Good thing I put the glass I used last night in the dishwasher.”
Norman’s coffee table was huge and Hannah watched the two cats skid across its surface. “What’s next?” she asked him.
“The reverse. Watch for Cuddles to do a one-eighty against the far wall.”
Cuddles did precisely what Norman had described and Hannah laughed. “She pushed off like an Olympic swimmer.”
“Lean forward,” Norman warned an instant before the two cats skyrocketed along the back of the couch again.
“Is there more?” Hannah asked as the two cats sped out of the living room.
“Yes, in the den. They’ll go up and down the staircase at least six times. Then they’ll tear straight through here and hit the other staircase to go up to the bedrooms. Unless you’d like something cold to drink, we could leave now while they’re occupied.”
Hannah glanced at her watch. “Let’s leave now and get something to drink at the Inn. I need to talk to Sally anyway.”
“Are you planning to get some background information about Doctor Bev and Roger?”
“Yes. It’s the scattergun approach. I want to find out all I can about Doctor Bev’s daily life while she was staying there. It might not have anything to do with her murder, but you never know what might come to light if you can manage to ask the right questions.”
The daylight was beginning to fade as they walked out to Norman’s car. The air was filled with the rich perfume of the lilac bushes that grew close to the house, and a few lazy bumblebees droned among the purple, pink, and white blossoms. As night approached, the temperature was beginning to drop a bit, heat lightning flashed against the darkening sky, and the mosquitoes hadn’t found her yet. It was the perfect start to a summer evening in Minnesota.
Norman opened her car door and she slid into the passenger seat. “Why don’t they bite you?” she asked in her best non-sequitur fashion.
“I don’t know. They never have.”
Hannah smiled. Norman had known exactly what she was asking. “How about your mother?”
“They bite her.”
“Your father?”
“They bit him, too. It’s just me. When I was a kid I used to think I was adopted because I was the only one in the family they didn’t bother. Then, when I got older, I realized how silly that was.”
“That’s good.”
“Maybe not. That was when I began to believe that I was from another planet.”
Hannah laughed. She’d walked right into that one.
Norman started the car and they drove off. “Do you want the air on?” he asked her.
“No, let’s roll down the windows. I love the night air and as long as we’re moving, the mosquitoes won’t be able to draw a bead on me.”
Hannah leaned back and let the night air caress her face as Norman turned on
the road that ran around Eden Lake. If she were rich, she wouldn’t want an expensive sports car like Doctor Bev. She’d want a luxury sedan and a driver. That way she could lean back and relax as an expert drove her along scenic routes that led only to places she wanted to go. “If I ever get rich, I want a car and a driver,” she said, voicing her thoughts aloud.
“You don’t have to get rich for that. I’ve got a car and I drive. And you’ve got me.”
“Yes,” Hannah said, smiling softly into the darkness. She had Norman and life was good.
“Hey, you two!” a voice called out from the bar as Sally led Hannah and Norman into the dining room.
“Roger,” Sally told them, giving a little wave in Roger’s direction. “He’s been drinking here since mid-afternoon. Poor guy. He’s really upset and he keeps talking about what a great woman she was. I bit my tongue so many times it got sore, so I excused myself and left him with Dick. Every time he said how much he missed her, I wanted to tell him how lucky he . . .” Sally stopped and made a face. “Sorry, Norman.”
“There’s nothing to be sorry about, Sally. It’s the pure unvarnished truth. Roger’s much better off without her. I know I am.”
“Norman! Come over here and have a drink!” Roger called out.
“Be right there,” Norman replied, and then he turned to Hannah. “You want to talk to Sally, don’t you?”
“Well, yes, but . . .”
“Go ahead,” Norman interrupted any objection she might make. “Your mother and Doc Knight aren’t here yet, and I wanted to talk to Roger anyway.”
“Okay,” Hannah said, catching on at last. Norman wanted to pump Roger for information and he thought it would be easier done as a guy-to-guy thing.
“How about coming back to my office?” Sally asked. “Dot’s the hostess tonight and I’ll tell her to buzz me when your mother and Doc Knight come in.”
“That’s fine with me,” Hannah agreed. She loved to go to Sally’s office with its picture window overlooking the kitchen.
Once they’d stopped at the hostess station to give Dot instructions, and Hannah had asked about her husband and baby, Jamie, Sally led her down the hallway to her office.
“Sit here,” she said, gesturing to the chair opposite her desk. “I want to show you my new dessert. It’s called Snappy Turtle Pie and I’m putting it on the menu for the first time tonight.”
Hannah watched as Sally picked up the phone and dialed a number. Then she turned toward the window and saw a woman in the kitchen pick up the phone.
“Hi, Mary,” Sally greeted the woman. “Could you please find out if anyone’s ordered the Snappy Turtle Pie yet?”
Hannah watched as Mary made her way to a man in a chef’s toque. A moment later, she was back on the phone again.
“Excellent,” Sally said. “And you’re on the second pie?” She listened for a moment and then she spoke again. “Ask him if he’ll prepare a piece for you to bring in here. And I could use two mugs of black coffee, too. Thank you, Mary.”
“What’s Snappy Turtle Pie?” Hannah asked when Sally had hung up the phone. She hoped it wasn’t real snapping turtle.
“You’ll see. I don’t want to spoil the surprise. Norman said you wanted to talk to me. Is it about Doctor Bev?”
“Yes. Mike sent down a diver and they recovered a thermos from her new car. Doc Knight’s testing the contents right now to see if they contain the tranquilizers that killed her. I really need to know if anyone here filled that thermos for her before she left yesterday morning.”
“Let me check with room service. And if no one delivered coffee to their suite, I’ll ask the busboys who were working at breakfast. It’s possible one of them filled the thermos.”
“Thanks, Sally. It’s important. I really need to know.”
“Because it could get you off the hook?”
Obviously, the Lake Eden gossip hotline was working. “You’re right, but only if the coffee in the thermos tests positive for tranquilizers.”
“Let me know as soon as you know. I’ve been worried about you. I’ll find out where that coffee came from. Was it black?”
“No. Doc Knight said she had coffee, cream, sweetener, and my cupcakes in her stomach.”
“There was sparkling water too. That’s all she had at lunch. I waited on them myself.”
“Did Norman look uncomfortable at lunch?”
“Like a sheep about to be shorn. He wanted out in the worst way possible, but you know Norman. He wasn’t about to make a scene that might hurt my lunch business.”
Hannah knew she was asking questions that had nothing to do with her investigation, but she couldn’t seem to stop. “How about Doctor Bev? Did she look happy to be with Norman?”
Sally threw up her hands. “Who could tell with her? All I know is that she kept trying to put her hand over his, and he kept pulling his hand away. I wasn’t close enough to hear their conversation, but it was clear that Norman wanted to be almost anywhere but here with her.” Sally paused and smiled. “That question wasn’t part of your investigation, was it?”
“No, it was personal,” Hannah admitted.
There was a knock on the door and Sally shouted for whoever it was to come in. The woman Hannah had seen on the phone in the kitchen entered the room with a tray.
“Here’s your coffee, Sally,” she said, setting the tray on the table. “And here’s the pie.”
“Just put the pie in front of Hannah,” Sally said, gesturing toward Hannah. “Thanks, Mary. Just leave the tray and I’ll carry it in the kitchen when we’re through.”
Hannah glanced down at the pie and began to smile. “It’s darling!” she said, noticing the cookie shaped like a turtle on top. “Where did you get those cookies?”
“We bake them here. It’s a recipe from Lisa’s Aunt Nancy and she gave it to me. Her aunt sent her three cookie recipes and she said this one was too labor intensive for The Cookie Jar, but it was so cute, she thought I’d like it. It’s not too labor intensive for us. Mary loves to fuss with garnishes and things and she really enjoys baking these.”
“You’re going to spoil my dinner,” Hannah said.
“No, I’m not. When your mother called in for the reservation she told me you hadn’t eaten for hours.”
“That’s true.” Hannah cut off the tip of the pie and popped it into her mouth. “Mmmmmm!”
Sally smiled. “It’s just like a turtle sundae in a chocolate cookie crust. Try the cookie.”
Hannah didn’t need a second invitation. She bit into the turtle cookie and smiled with enjoyment. “Tell Mary the cookies are absolutely perfect. This is going to be a huge hit, Sally.”
“I think so, too. And since the pie is an ice cream pie, it’s great for the summer.”
Hannah made short work of both pie and cookie. When she was finished, she laughed.
“What’s so funny?” Sally asked.
“I was just thinking of something my Great-Grandma Elsa used to say. It was, Life is risky. Eat dessert first!”
SNAPPY TURTLE PIE
1 chocolate cookie crumb pie shell (chocolate is
best, but shortbread or graham cracker will also
work just fine)
1 pint vanilla ice cream
4 ounces ( of a 6-ounce jar) caramel ice cream
topping (I used Smucker’s)
½ cup salted pecan pieces
4 ounces ( of an 6-ounce jar) chocolate fudge ice
cream topping (I used Smucker’s)
1 small container frozen Cool Whip (original, not
low-fat, or real whipped cream)
Hannah’s Note: If you can’t find salted pecans, buy plain pecans. Measure out ½ cup of pieces, heat them in the microwave or the oven until they’re hot and then toss them with 2 Tablespoons of melted, salted butter. Sprinkle on a ¼ teaspoon of salt, toss again, and you have salted pecan pieces.
Set your cookie crumb pie shell on the counter along with your ice cream carton. Let the ice cream soft
en for 5 to 10 minutes. You want it approximately the consistency of soft-serve.
Using a rubber spatula, spread out your ice cream in the bottom of the chocolate cookie crumb crust. Smooth the top with the spatula.
Working quickly, pour the caramel topping over the ice cream. You can drizzle it, pour it, whatever. Just try to get it as evenly distributed as you can.
Sprinkle the salted pecan pieces on top of the caramel layer.
Pour or drizzle the chocolate fudge topping over the pecans.
Cover the top of your pie with wax paper (don’t push it down—you don’t want it to stick) and put your Snappy Turtle Pie in the freezer overnight.
Put your container of Cool Whip in the refrigerator overnight. Then it’ll be spreadable in the morning.
In the morning, remove your pie from the freezer and spread Cool Whip over the top. Cover it with wax paper again and stick it back into the freezer for at least 6 hours.
If you’re not planning to serve your pie for dinner that night, wait until the 6 hours are up and then put it into a freezer bag and return it to the freezer for storage. It will be fine for about a month.
Take your Snappy Turtle Pie out of the freezer and place it on the countertop about 15 minutes before you’re ready to serve it. When it’s time for dessert, cut it into 6 pieces as you would a regular pie, put each piece on a dessert plate, and place one Snappy Turtle Cookie (recipe follows) on the center of each piece, the head of the turtle facing the tip of the pie.
Yield: 6 slices of yummy ice cream pie that all of your guests will ooh and ahh over.
SNAPPY TURTLE COOKIES