It's a Baby, Andy Russell

by David A. Adler

  Andy was standing close to the kitchen table, but Aunt Janet had moved her chair. She was almost against the wall.

  “Get it away!” Aunt Janet shouted.

  “You said to bring my friends to dinner. Well, this is my friend.”

  “Please, your gerbil looks just like a mouse and I’m afraid of mice. Ask your dad. I’ve always been afraid of mice.”

  Andy looked at the gerbil. He couldn’t understand why Aunt Janet didn’t think it was cute. And he didn’t understand how anyone could be afraid of anything so small. He was sure once she saw it she would let him keep the gerbils in the house.

  Andy looked back up at Aunt Janet. She had her hands up, in front of her face. Her eyes were open wide.

  “Please, get it away,” Aunt Janet pleaded.

  Andy stepped back.

  “Animals carry germs and disease,” she repeated.

  “Germs!” Andy cried. “Diseases! My animals are healthy.”

  “I clean and scrub to keep my patients and their hospital rooms clean.”

  “My friends are clean,” Andy said.

  “I gave Sparky lots of baths, sometimes three a day,” Aunt Janet said, “but I never brought Sparky to the hospital.”

  Andy looked past Aunt Janet at Rachel and Tamika. “Did you ever hear Slither, Sylvia, or one of the gerbils cough or sneeze?” he asked them.

  Both girls shook their heads.

  “You see?” Andy said in triumph. “They’re not germy.”

  “Please, put the animal back in its cage. Then come back and wash your hands with soap and water.”

  Andy whispered in the gerbil’s ear, “I’m taking you back to your friends.”

  “What did you say?” Aunt Janet asked. “You know I can’t hear you when you mumble.”

  “I said I’m going.”

  She told me to invite my friends. Well, she didn’t mean it! Andy thought as he left the kitchen. She just wants them out.

  When Andy reached the basement door, he stopped. He took a deep breath and whispered to the gerbil, “Don’t you worry. No one is getting rid of you.”

  Andy walked down the basement steps. He put the gerbil in its tank. Then he looked at Slither, Sylvia, and the three tanks filled with gerbils. He really meant what he said, that Aunt Janet would not get rid of them.

  Andy stood there for a moment and thought. He was only nine years old. Aunt Janet was an adult. He knew he couldn’t really stop Aunt Janet from doing anything. But if I can’t stop her, how will I keep her from getting rid of my pets. How?

  Andy looked in the gerbil tank again. He saw some of the gerbils. Others were hidden in the tunnels.

  Then Andy smiled. He knew just what he would do.

  Chapter 7

  Eggs, String Beans, Peas, and Soap

  “I’ll hide you,” Andy told the gerbils. “If she can’t find you, she can’t get rid of you. Even Aunt Janet can’t do that.”

  The gerbils weren’t listening. They were running through tunnels, eating from their food bowls, and drinking from their water tubes.

  “Now the big question is, where can I hide all of you?”

  Hmmm, Andy thought and looked around the basement. We have all these board games. I’ll take

  out the boards and cards and phony money and put all that stuff in the snake and gerbil tanks. Then I’ll poke holes in the boxes so the animals can breathe.

  But that was no good. It would be too dark inside and he couldn’t be sure the boxes would stay closed. The animals could get out.

  Andy opened the cellar door and looked in there. I could hide them behind the clothing boxes, he thought, but it’s so dark. And if Aunt Janet can find a few dirty plates, she can definitely find a snake, a goldfish, and twenty gerbils.

  Andy returned to the basement and looked at the three gerbil tanks and Slither’s tank. Why does the good news of having a baby have to be ruined by bad news? he wondered. Why are such big people afraid of such little animals?

  “Andy,” Rachel called. She was standing at the top of the basement stairs. “You should come up. Aunt Janet is waiting for you to eat the eggs.”

  “She is?”

  Rachel nodded.

  “She wants you to taste them, to see if you like them,” Rachel explained, “or if you think she should add orange slices and cranberries to the recipe.”

  “Oranges, cranberries, string beans, peas, and eggs,” Andy said. “She hates gerbils and loves strange food. Some aunt!”

  “And Andy,” Rachel added, “why did you bring the gerbil into the kitchen?”

  “It’s my friend.”

  “I know. I like the gerbils, too, but Aunt Janet doesn’t,” Rachel sighed.

  When Andy and Rachel walked in through the kitchen door Aunt Janet said, “Please, wash your hands and try my Vege-Eggs.”

  Andy walked to the sink. He turned the faucet and put his hands under the water.

  “Use soap,” Aunt Janet told him. “In the hospital we always wash our hands with soap. It’s a rule.”

  Andy squirted liquid dishwashing soap onto his hands. He rubbed his hands together until there was lots of lather. He spread the lather up to his elbow. Then he washed it off and started again. This time he put the stopper in the sink.

  The sink quickly filled with water. Andy covered his hands and arms with soap and dipped them in. Water from the faucet hit his arms and spilled onto the floor.

  “SHUT THE WATER OFF!” Aunt Janet and Rachel shouted.

  Andy turned the faucet. He took out the stopper and watched the water go down the drain. Then he dried his hands, went to the table, and sat down. Aunt Janet loaded a plate with eggs, put it in front of Andy, and said, “You’ll like it. You really will.”

  Andy stuck his fork into the eggs. He poked around, looking for some egg without string beans or peas.

  “It’s one of my best dishes,” Aunt Janet said.

  Andy put a little on his fork and tasted it.

  “Yuck!” Andy mumbled.

  “What? What did you say?” Aunt Janet asked. “Did you say ‘Yum?’ It is good, isn’t it?”

  Andy looked at his plate. There was so much Vege-Egg on it. He couldn’t eat it all.

  He pushed his fork in and brought up some more egg. This time there was a string bean in the egg. He nibbled it.

  Yuck! Andy thought, but he didn’t say it this time. It tastes like you used soap, too, like you cooked with soap.

  “Eat it quickly,” Tamika whispered. “Before your taste buds taste it.”

  “Tasty? Did you say it’s tasty?” Aunt Janet asked Tamika. “Do you want more?”

  “No! No, thank you,” Tamika quickly replied.

  Aunt Janet looked at Rachel.

  Rachel shook her head, patted her stomach, and declared, “I’m full.”

  “Well,” Aunt Janet said to Andy. “That leaves plenty for you.”

  She smiled at him and asked, “Do you have the sign upstairs because of the gerbils?”

  “What sign?”

  “The NO SWIMMING sign in the bathroom. Is it for the gerbils, to tell them not to swim in the toilets?” She smiled. “You know, gerbils can’t read.”

  Oh no! Andy thought. She saw the signs!

  “Um,” he stammered. “It’s not for anyone. The sign is a joke.”

  “I know,” Aunt Janet said. “And when I asked if they were for the gerbils, I was joking, too.”

  “You were joking?”

  Aunt Janet smiled.

  Maybe that’s what these are, Andy thought. Maybe these eggs are a joke.

  “Go on,” Aunt Janet said. “Eat your dinner.”

  Andy nibbled a little more egg. He knew he should do what Tamika said, eat it real quickly, so the taste torture would be over, but he just couldn’t do it.

  Aunt Janet watched Andy nibble. She smiled.

  Andy wanted to scream, to tell her the Vege-Eggs tasted terrible, but he didn’t. He nibbled some more egg. And while he ate he thought about his pets.


  Hey, she doesn’t want my pets in this house. That’s the answer. I’ll just take them to another house. I’ll take them to the Perlmans’.

  Dr. and Mrs. Perlman lived next door to the Russells. Andy knew he could get into the Perlmans’ house because Tamika had a key. Mrs. Perlman had asked her to watch the house.

  I’ll bring all the tanks to the Perlmans’ and when Aunt Janet leaves, I’ll bring them back.

  Andy was happy. Now he just had to find a way to sneak his snake and gerbils and goldfish out of the house so they would be safe.

  He nibbled some more egg. Yuck! He thought again. He had found a way to save his animals, but it seemed nothing would save him from Aunt Janet’s egg disaster.

  He nibbled some peas.

  RRRRing!

  It was the telephone. Rachel hurried from her seat to the counter to grab it. Tamika and Aunt Janet turned.

  I’m saved! Andy thought. While Aunt Janet was looking at Rachel, he quickly took a handful of egg, put it in his pants pocket, then wiped his hand on the back of his shirt.

  “It’s Dad!” Rachel said.

  She listened for a moment. Then she screamed, “YES!”

  Chapter 8

  What’s Up?

  “Mom had the baby,” Rachel announced. “It’s a boy!”

  “Hooray!” Andy and Tamika screamed.

  “That’s wonderful,” Aunt Janet said. “Please, let me speak to him.”

  Rachel gave her the telephone.

  Aunt Janet asked Mr. Russell lots of questions about the baby, how much he weighed, how long he was, and if he was healthy. She also asked about Andy’s mom.

  “Yes, yes,” she said. “I made them dinner. I created something new: Vege-Eggs.”

  She looked at Andy’s plate.

  “The children ate it all, even Andy,” Aunt Janet said proudly.

  Rachel and Tamika looked at Andy’s plate, too. They were surprised to see it was empty.

  “Can I talk to Dad?” Andy asked.

  Aunt Janet gave Andy the telephone.

  “Hey, Dad, how’s the baby?”

  “Your little brother is so cute,” Mr. Russell said. “He looks just like you did when you were a baby.”

  “What color hair does he have? Is he a righty or a lefty?”

  “Righty or lefty! What kind of question is that?” Rachel laughed. She grabbed the telephone. “What do you think the baby is doing now, writing a letter?”

  “When can we see Mom and the baby?” Rachel asked. She listened for a moment and then told the others, “We can visit tonight, at eight.”

  Tamika spoke to Mr. Russell next. Then she gave the telephone to Aunt Janet.

  “Congratulations again. We’ll see you very soon,” she said and hung up the telephone.

  “That’s wonderful news!” Aunt Janet exclaimed. “Now we have to hurry. We have to get ourselves ready to visit the hospital. And we have to get the house ready for the baby.”

  “Are you still hungry?” she asked Andy. “Do you want more Vege-Eggs?”

  “No!” Andy said. “I mean, no, thank you.”

  “Then let’s clean up. Someone has to scrub the frying pan and wash the dishes. And one of you has to sweep.”

  Andy began to clear the table.

  “Why don’t you make the signs,” Aunt Janet said to Andy. “It would be nice if we had them up when your mother and brother come home.”

  “Yes. The signs,” Andy said.

  This is my chance to rescue my pets, he thought.

  “I’ll make them on the computer. It’s in the basement.”

  Andy hurried downstairs.

  “The signs will have to wait,” Andy told Slither, Sylvia, and the gerbils. “I’ve come to rescue you. I’m taking you to the Perlmans’.”

  Andy reached around one of the gerbil tanks. He carefully took it off the shelf. It was big and heavy. As soon as the tank moved, the gerbils went wild.

  “Don’t be scared,” Andy told them.

  But they were scared.

  Andy couldn’t see where he was going so he took one small step at a time. He walked toward the stairs. He felt the first step with his foot. He slowly walked up.

  “I’ve got to put you down,” he told the gerbils. “I’ve got to see if Aunt Janet is still in the kitchen.”

  Andy put the tank on the floor, right outside the basement door. He quietly walked toward the kitchen. He heard Aunt Janet’s voice and could see her back. She was standing by the stove. Andy opened the front door just a little and hurried back to the gerbils.

  “She’s busy,” he told them. “Now’s our chance.”

  Andy picked up the tank and quietly carried it to the front door. He used his foot and opened it wide enough to get out. He carried the tank across his front yard and onto the Perlmans’ porch. He put the tank down and turned the doorknob. It was locked, of course.

  “I forgot to get the key from Tamika,” Andy told the gerbils. “Don’t worry. I’ll be right back and I’ll bring your friends.”

  Andy hurried home. He went to the kitchen. Tamika was washing dishes and Rachel was drying them. He didn’t see Aunt Janet.

  “Tamika,” Andy whispered, “I have to talk to you.”

  Tamika put the dish she was washing back in the sink. She followed Andy out of the kitchen. “What’s up?” Tamika asked.

  “Where’s Aunt Janet?”

  “She’s sitting down,” Tamika said. “She still hurts from her fall.”

  “She blames me for that, I bet. She’s always blaming me for something.”

  Tamika shook her head. “She didn’t say it was your fault. She just said it hurt.”

  Andy told Tamika about his plan to hide Slither and the gerbils. He asked her for the key to the Perlmans’ house.

  “I think you’re making a mistake,” Tamika said. “Aunt Janet never said you have to give away your pets. She said she had to give away her dog.”

  “Didn’t she say animals aren’t allowed in a hospital?”

  Tamika nodded.

  “And didn’t she say this house has to be as clean as a hospital?”

  Tamika nodded again.

  “You see,” Andy said. “I’m one step ahead of her. I’m a whole staircase ahead of her. There’s one thing I know and that is you have to keep ahead of Aunt Janet. Now, will you please help me save my pets?”

  “OK.”

  Tamika went upstairs. When she came down she gave Andy the key to the Perlmans’ house. She asked him if he needed help carrying the animals next door.

  “What I really need is for you to keep Aunt Janet in the kitchen looking the other way, away from the front door.”

  “I can do that,” Tamika said.

  Tamika went back to the kitchen and Andy went to the basement. He took the second gerbil tank and quietly carried it out of the house.

  “You'll be visiting the Perlmans for a while,” he told the gerbils. “They’re not home, but you would like them. They’re nice.”

  Andy put this tank next to the other one. He unlocked the front door and went inside. At first he thought he would put the animals on the kitchen table. But then he remembered what Aunt Janet said about gerbils and food and thought Mrs. Perlman might not like having them in the kitchen. She might not like it if he put them in the living or dining rooms, either. He decided to put them in Dr. Perlman’s office. That was Andy’s favorite room. He loved the old brass and wood barber’s chair, the mechanical bank, and the menorah with all the flowers.

  Andy put the tanks on Dr. Perlman’s desk.

  “I’ll visit you every day,” Andy told the gerbils. “I’ll bring you food and water.”

  Then he hurried home. He opened the door...and there was Aunt Janet.

  “Did you hang the signs outside?” she asked.

  “Not yet,” Andy answered. “I didn’t finish making them. I’ll do that now.”

  “Good,” Aunt Janet said. Then she turned and went upstairs.

  Andy hurried to the edg
e of the stairs and watched Aunt Janet go into the bathroom.

  Chapter 9

  I Know! The Garage!

  Andy went downstairs.

  “Evan was born,” he told Sylvia the goldfish, “and Dad said he’s cute, just like I was as a baby.” Then he turned to Slither and the remaining gerbils and said, “I’ll get you to the Perlmans’, just as soon as I make a few signs for my brother.”

  Andy sat at the computer. He typed WELCOME! and added a picture of two babies, a boy and a girl, in diapers. He set the computer to print four copies of the sign.

  Evan, Andy thought. He’ll be just like me and love animals.

  He got up and reached around the last gerbil tank. “We’re going to the Perlmans’,” he informed the gerbils and took the tank off the shelf. “But as soon as Aunt Janet is gone, you’ll come back and you’ll get to meet Evan.”

  Andy slowly walked up the basement steps. When he got to the top, he listened. He didn’t hear anyone nearby. He started toward the front door and then he saw her. Aunt Janet was standing with her back to Andy and looking out the long, narrow window in the door.

  I’ve got to get out of here, Andy thought. And fast!

  Andy turned. Then, in his hurry to get downstairs, his legs got tangled. He fell. He landed first on his knees, then on his elbows. The tank fell from his hands and landed on its side. Luckily, it didn’t break, but the screen on top came off. Andy quickly got up. He grabbed the screen and held it in place before any of the frightened gerbils could get out.

  Aunt Janet ran to Andy. “What happened?” she asked.

  “I saved the gerbils,” Andy told her.

  “Oh my, are you hurt?” Aunt Janet put on her worried beagle face.

  “No, they don’t hurt me. They don’t bite and they don’t have germs.”

  “But I thought they were already downstairs...Oh, just hurry,” Aunt Janet said. “We’re going to the hospital soon.”

  Andy picked up the tank. “Don’t worry,” he whispered. “I’ll save you.” Then he told Aunt Janet, “I’m taking them to the basement.”

  “Hurry,” Aunt Janet repeated. “We’re going to the hospital soon.”