We walk into the truck stop to wait and start cruising the cheap (yet incredibly expensive) “souvenir” aisles. I know none of the key chains will have Kiel’s name and they next to never have mine. So I only run my hands across them to hear the clink of cheap metal.
After the key chains quiet, I look up and see him heading straight for us. A few teen girls and an older lady eye him covetously up and down. Yeah, ladies, he's mine, I’m tempted to yell. That might be overkill. They can look but not touch. Never touch.
Mom surreptitiously disappears into the snack aisles. Kiel takes both my hands at my sides, stepping closer until only a foot separates us.
“Hi, Kiel,” I murmur.
“Hey, Ash,” he replies.
Our eyes are locked. He leans in and says, “This is going to sound strange.” Stranger than the phone call, I wonder. “But I just had a fight with my mom. Defending you after she found the pictures I kept from your locker.”
“You what?” she hisses at me.
“Not the focus, Ash. Focus.”
“Oh-K,” I drawl out.
He starts out quietly, “When I defended you, I found myself saying the exact words I have to say to you now. Yes, at first I didn’t want a girlfriend at all, especially from this town. Then you came along. I thought you and your bad reputation wouldn’t be good for me. Then it sunk in that I had no room to judge you, to think you didn’t deserve the chance, and I wasn’t going to give it to you. From me? That’s just a load of hypocritical bull. You should never have had to prove yourself.” He pauses before continuing. “Maybe I was more worried about what my parents would think. But that would make them hypocrites, too. They moved us here to give me the opportunity to escape my past! What I'm trying to say, with all that is that I'm sorry I ever said that to Reyna. Babe, I didn’t really know you and I was judging you, but—”
I squeal, stopping him from getting out any more of his speech. He doesn’t know whether to share my enthusiasm or step back. Right here in the truck stop gift shop, I throw myself at Kiel. He lifts me up and gives me a small spin (mindful of the eagle “sculptures” and shot glasses).
“You are so forgiven. I love you!” For good measure, I squeal again.
“I freaking love you, too. Now can we stop with the squealing?”
“Absolutely!” I say and proceed to kiss him senseless while my legs still dangle in the air. I see all the women, except my MIA mom, glaring at us like we’re indecent. Oh, I could show them indecent. Kiel’s neck is calling my name, but Mom pokes her head around the corner of the chip aisle. I press my lips to his one last time in a tiny, chaste kiss. He sets me down when he sees my mom.
He whispers, “Sorry I couldn’t wait again. With you, I have to get it out there. One of these days, you may reject me for some stupid crap I say, but until then, I’ll keep sneaking in and chasing you down.”
Oh my sweet aunt! That could be the single most romantic thing he's said to me so far. My lips part in awe. He reaches out and taps the bottom one with his index finger. “See you tonight, babe,” he murmurs and leaves. I am slack-jawed and bothered in the pleasant way. The very pleasant way.
Mom grabs a cheesy jackalope postcard to fan me and my flaming red cheeks, now with embarassment. “Thanks Mom. We can go now, I think.”
“Ash, honey. You have it so bad. What are we going to do with you?”
“Maybe I should just marry him…” I barely realize I'm saying it out loud until I hear Mom make a little choking noise.
“No one your age gets married unless they're stupid and pregnant,” she says conversationally. I don’t think she means the words. She's probably testing my own convictions against those of my peers.
“Or stupid crazy in love. Ugh, Mom. Forget I said it. I know it sounds idiotic.”
***
Later, Mom drives me and my girl-time baggage to Jenna’s house. It’s the first time I've been here, but I've passed it on many occasions. The Lasseter home is one of the newer, large houses outside of town that look like they belong in a suburban subdivision. Not out here, surrounded by cow patties and barbed wire.
The girls barrel outside helping me carry in my makeup kit, dress bag, and travel jewelry bag. Girly-time has always been my thing. I am always prepared to get prepared.
They hound me almost immediately about last night. The rumor mill has been in high gear. That must have been what Liliana had been up to. None of us was sworn to secrecy by the drunken Reyna. I tell them my version of the drive from hell.
After more questioning and laughing, we get down to beautification. Jenna plays some girl-power rock ranging from Pat Benatar to Lady Gaga. I give the girls makeovers. This is sort of a specialty of mine, having done the squads makeup often enough and attending cheer clinics.
“Hey, there's a career idea I think I can handle. Cosmetology won’t make me rich, but that’ll be my husband’s job,” I tell them
Then they attempt to give me a makeover. Only they're fighting each other over the color selection and D'Nae pokes my eye while laughing when I tell them about the truck stop. We eventually get ready for real. I can’t wait for this night. My dress fits perfectly and my new silver, strappy heels are killer. I check the clock. I squeal the time to the girls and bounce absurdly.
***
Kiel
When I had gotten back from the truck stop, Mom was waiting for me. She was far from finished with me especially since I had decided to leave abruptly after giving her a piece of my mind. Mom picked up where she’d left off. The only thing I could think to do was shrug and zone her out. Disparaging Ash wouldn’t get her anywhere with me.
She finally relented and read me the riot act about trust and honesty; nothing I hadn’t heard already. Also not new to me was the speech on a man’s responsibility. Trust me, I've had my fair share of these in my checkered past. The texts about Reyna have Mom worried about teenage pregnancy…and Ashlyn. Zoned out on her again because my past is obviously playing a role in her anxiety.
At least after talking to Ashlyn I’m calmed somewhat. That’s what’s so special about her. She’s so rarely angry.
I sit quietly and hope she’ll get to know Ash in the future and realize this was just judgmental nonsense.
***
I pace my bedroom that evening, dressed and ready to go. It’s not formal, for the guys anyway, so I picked out a gray, long-sleeve button-up along with black, flat-front slacks. I borrowed a skinny tie that has emerald green flecks from my dad, turns out he has quite the collection. Dad also offers to lend me some shoes. I decide, in the end, to stick with my gray Converse. They’ve never failed me before.
On lap 40 or so, I glance at the clock that now reads 7:30. I head to the living room, where my family is sitting. Dad hadn’t bothered with any speeches. I only got the “look” of disappointment. He never had to use words to convey those sort of emotions anymore. He did, however, have the distinct privilege of delivering the punishment. No Jeep for two weeks. It truly was more punishing to them since they’d have to do pick ups and drop offs.
I jingle my keys in my pocket (for one of the last times for fourteen days), not sure if I should bother bringing Ashlyn by here to show her off. If Mom was going to be rude, there was no point.
“Why does he still get to go?” Liliana whined. I am so freaking glad I don’t have to hear that all night.
“Because it’s his last homecoming, Lili,” Dad tells her rationally. Not that rational has ever worked with Lili.
“I’d rather have something else taken away! Like Ki-el.” There she goes again…
Ignoring her, I say, “Moving on. Mom, should I even bother bringing Ash by here first?” I'm not pulling punches. Either she accepts her or she doesn’t. Mom’s expression changes to hurt.
Dad clears his throat, like he’s reminding her to say something. She only reaches over to tap her camera on the coffee table. Dad sighs and says, “Of course we want to see you two before you head out. Not too many of these opportunit
ies left with our son.”
So much in so few words. I've missed a lot of opportunities. What I have left is relatively important in that respect, despite any other feelings they’re harboring. I nod, turn, and leave. In the Jeep, I crank the music up blaringly loud trying to forget why this was so important to them.
This could conceivably be considered the second date for Ash and me. It’s a little messed up, I admit. But what about my life hasn’t been? At least this kind of messed up was amazingly without side effects, unless I count the withdrawal I feel when I'm away from her.
Keeping proper date format, I go up to the Lasseter’s door and knock. I don’t know who I expected to answer, maybe a parental figure. But it’s her. I stand in openmouthed awe, looking her up and down. Ashlyn in that dress is a knockout. She's naturally a 10, but tonight she's an 11. Her heels bring her up to my shoulders. Her hair is in some elaborately messy side braid.
Eventually, I find my voice. Softly, I say “Hi. You are amazing in that dress.” What I don’t say is I’d like to be there when she takes it off. I'm certain that falls under the ‘No’ category after the trust speeches we received today.
“You are too, Kiel,” she responds.
“Yeah? In that dress?” I tease.
“Ha ha. I mean you look amazing too, crazy.” She reaches out and smooths my tie.
“Let’s go…before we don’t.” As in, we find us a that “where.” Yeah, I need to be around other people to cool off. It’s that dress, on that body. I offer her my arm which she takes, tucking her hand in the crook of my elbow.
I notice Jenna and D'Nae have been intently watching our interaction. Awkward. We wave to them as I lift up and situate Ash and her dress. I'm getting in as Miller pulls up, seeming flustered, beside us in the driveway.
“Hang on for a minute, babe,” I tell her, as I climb back out, concerned for Miller. I walk over to his truck and get in the passenger side. He's emotionally swerving between angry and confused. I have a conversation with him that I hope helps, but I get out of his truck feeling the same emotions for his situation. His parents’ attitudes make me glad for mine. My mom may be judgmental, but at least she comes by it honestly.
When I get back in my Jeep, Miller’s heading for the front door in control of his features at least.
“Everything OK?” Ashlyn asks. Miller has grown on her too in the past few weeks.
“Nope. But I hope it will be. His parents are jerks. Ready?”
***
We make our appearance at my house first. The tension in the air is palpable and Mom is acting frosty. I see Dad surreptitiously elbow her, none too gently. In case she’s forgotten how Dad’s family treats her, I figure. That nudge forces her to fix a somewhat less fake smile on her face.
Despite the disapproval of Ashlyn Mom’s still clinging haplessly to, several pictures are taken. Ashlyn acts like nothing is off, hugging them both before we leave.
“I'll talk to her,” Dad says under his breath when he throws his arm over my shoulders to wish us a good evening. I'm confident that he will…and he might even succeed.
Safely in the Jeep again, Ash mumbles, “That was rather uncomfortable.”
“Yeah. Sorry about that. You weren’t on her hit list until she found the pictures and had them to compare to Lili’s. Talk about disaster. If it makes you feel any better, Dad is annoyed at her for taking it out on you.”
We are near her house when she whips around and asks, “Um, why did you keep those pictures?”
I shrug. There's really no single, sensible answer to that question. “I have no idea. One never made it to your purse, one I took off your locker, and the third and worst one I took from you. I guess I didn’t know where to throw them away. Or they were some kind of sick reminder at first of why to steer clear of you. I seriously have no idea. Once they were in the book, I never pulled them back out.”
She smirks and refuses to explain why.
“Here we are! The next stop on the awkward tour,” Ashlyn says, clapping once in false cheer.
“What should I expect here at Casa del Ramos? Shotguns? Hounds?”
“Hounds? Really Kiel? Maybe pitbulls…” I laugh and she continues. “I'm not exactly sure what my mom has shared with Dad, especially after our truck stop detour.”
“Ha. I didn’t think about that. I've got to start thinking these things through.” I exit the Jeep to who-knows-what welcome awaits.
***
Ashlyn
Enthralled does not completely describe how I felt when I opened the door at Jenna’s house. I blame it on Kiel’s tie. Hormones were acting up again as I imagined tugging him toward me with it. Instead, I caged the beast and opted for giving the tie a loving stroke, making sure it laid flat.
At his house, there’s a weird vibe. Kiel informed me of the reason, but that doesn’t make it peachy or easier. I don’t miss the elbow Kiel’s dad serves to his mom. It makes her defrost a little and she attempts hospitality.
Cameras click and we’re done. Thank God.
Kiel is forewarned as well, only there’s really no way to predict their attitude toward him. My mom was downright composed this morning. And she even drove me to Abilene with no further discussion. When we get inside, there are warm welcomes and hugs.
Pictures are taken inside and out, with digital cameras and phone cameras. Brisa blasts us with messages with attachments and we all begin dinging as she tags us on social media. Brisa’s going too, so Mom pulls us girls to the side for pictures together while Dad drags Kiel off to the side yard, arm stretched amicably across his shoulders.
“Dad!” I say uselessly. “Mom?” I plead, hoping for an explanation. She only shrugs, like they hadn’t planned this. Those two never acted alone. The Parental United Front. Kiel better come back in one piece.
After peering around Mom during the photo session and annoying Brisa, I see them finally come back around. The pair appear totally at ease in each other’s company, chatting pleasantly in Spanish.
Kiel reaches for me and leads me to the Jeep, all smiles. We’ve made all our obligatory stops, smiling through flash after flash. The rest of tonight’s smiles are for Kiel only.
***
Arriving, Kiel lifts me down slowly, careful for the dress, but also to so he can hold me longer. He presses sweet kisses to the back of my hands.
“I want to keep you here all to myself as long as I can. I'll bet you wanna dance though,” Kiel whispers.
“It’s why we’re here, right? Otherwise, I’d take another field of stars,” I say.
“Don’t tempt me. An empty field, the night sky, and our choice of music playing. This dance is going to be pathetic in comparison.”
“True. However,” I contradict, “I think we both probably heard the same speeches today about honesty, trust, and our virtue.”
“Get your gorgeous butt in that building right now before I purposefully forget,” he grumbles.
I laugh but start walking with him, our arms linked. I can already hear the music blaring. Miller, D'Nae, and Jenna are waiting for us inside. We switch up—girls in front, arms linked, guys trailing behind us—and dive into the small sea of fellow students.
The first few songs are upbeat keeping the five of us together. It’s rap, country, and Top 40 fare, but that’s the best for dancing anyway. Miller is average white guy. The girls and I—well, let’s just say we have white chick swag.
Kiel’s a pretty alright dancer, even when it involves country music. Like me, he’s probably been to his share of quinceañeras and Hispanic weddings where the party goes until the venue shuts them down. He’s had to master all the typical styles and then some.
As a slow song starts, Jenna waves as she leaves to hunt down Lucas. I move to stand close to Kiel, as close as the chaperones will allow. The voice of Justin Timberlake begins to serenade all the couples dancing. Kiel links his hands with mine bringing them up between us. Our eyes are locked. The moment is perfect. He releases my hands, letting me g
et close again.
***
The next couple of hours are spent group dancing, line dancing, goofy dancing, and everything in between. The only breather we allow ourselves is for hydration. It is extremely easy to set aside all the drama and stupidity that has marred my life recently. Maybe it’s that way for everyone else also. That’s why it’s so imperative to be at this dance tonight, I guess.
Even those who had caused so much trouble are spinning, swaying, and waving their arms in the air with abandon. Everyone except Reyna, who is noticeably absent. Brisa had gone on a reconnaissance mission and brought back limited information. There was random chatter, and apparently no one had heard from her since the fateful party. We avoid those conversations at several turns, since it was Kiel’s sister who had posted, tagged, and shared all the incriminating media.
As the night wound down, the DJ called last slow dance. Jenna found herself a new dance partner and made her way out to us. The song starts and it’s country music, and as the night has proven, I won’t have to worry about my toes getting stomped by Kiel, and I know he can lead.
He moves one hand to my back and the fingers of our two hands together intertwine. We could be under the stars truly if I closed my eyes. My eyes stay open, however, and I keep my gaze trained on his as we start floating across the floor, caught up. Everyone else fades into the background, creating a romantic atmosphere where our breaths mingle and the air is electrically charged.
I rest my head on his chest to hear his heartbeat. “I love you,” I murmur into his chest, sure he’ll hear.
“I love you, too, Ash,” he whispers.
I allow the remaining three minutes of the song to consume me, cherishing each second. I breathe in his cologne; he rains kisses down on the top of my head. I cannot imagine this night ending, that it could possibly be over soon. How can we separate, wind up in different places tonight? Inconceivable.
Chapter 24
Kiel
I keep thinking about her dad’s speech to me. Ashlyn is dying to know, but what would be the point in telling her. There weren’t any actual shotguns… Her parents are quite astute in terms of our relationship. At least her parents and I are on the same page. That much was evident.
Absolutely (Larson) Page 24