Her hand grazes down my arm as she sits next to me on the porch.
I steal a glance in her direction and see the welts that remain on her body. Shit. I should never have let her leave with Felix. Elizabeth, Lucinda, the lines are blurring, my strength is diminishing. I'm losing the fight for control.
I stand, careful to keep my back to her, ready to bolt at a moment’s notice. “You have nothing to thank me for.”
She stands and moves in front of me, but I can't bear to look at her. I can't handle seeing the marks left upon her body. Her hands reach for mine. My pulse begins to race, but at the same time, a tranquility wraps around me as our skin touches. It is a sensation I’ve never known. Strange.
I embrace her hands with my own, gently lifting them to my lips, and place a kiss on her knuckles.
“Lucinda, please forgive me. I told you I’d protect you and I failed,” I whisper, keeping my head hung low.
When I see the dried blood still upon my hands, I cringe and my mind races with of all the possibilities last night may have been.
“Hey.” Her soft voice carries through my dark thoughts. “It’s been a few days since I’ve shifted and run, are you up for it?”
“A few days?” My heart pounds at this new information.
“Yes, four and a half days to be exact, since Dylan and Gavin found me,” she says. Shit. The Beast has been loose for four days, running wild doing who knows what hellish activities.
“Yes,” I manage to say through my clenched jaw. The realization that it’s been more than just one night since I lost control hits me like a brick. I'm on the verge of losing it again.
Shifting, I dart into the woods without waiting for Lucinda. I need to be alone.
Chapter 21
Lucinda
Caiden's shift catches me off guard. And the look in his eyes is daunting, it's screaming help. Good thing my reaction time is quicker than most, so I shift and chase after him. I don't think he should be alone.
Catching up to him, I run alongside of his wolf, keeping pace with his long strides. He doesn't acknowledge, nor does he growl at my presence. I guess it's okay I followed.
Running through the woods, the thick forest opens up to a beautiful meadow covered in a blanket of wildflowers. I stop at the edges, staring in awe at the wondrous sight in front of us. Caiden stops a few feet in front of me and looks back in my direction. He turns around and stands next to me for a moment, and then darts out into the open. He's calmer, I think. He's chasing butterflies, or maybe trying to kill them. I shrug, snickering to myself and chase after him.
Caiden turns to me as I approach, and I notice he has a distant look in his eyes. It's almost as if he is watching a memory unfold. He shakes his head and stalks toward me with his tail twitching high in the air. I take off and pounce on his back. He tumbles and we both roll.
We rumble playfully the rest of the afternoon. As dusk approaches, he catches me off guard and I smash onto the hard ground. Having the wind knocked out of me, I shift upon impact. Caiden shifts immediately after and runs to my side.
“Are you okay?” he asks brushing my head with his fingertips. “I’m so sorry.” His blue eyes are full of concern.
“I’m okay,” I whisper. My eyes meet his and we hold our gaze. My heart thumps in my chest and I nibble on my lower lip. Something flickers and his sapphire eyes turn black with a tinge of red as they hungrily roam over my body. Meeting my gaze again, my breath catches as he traces my neckline with his fingertip.
What was it that Mia said? Elizabeth was the only one that was able to calm him. My heart pounds harder and my cheeks burn as he lowers his head, my lips throb in anticipation as he descends upon me.
Our lips touch in the softest kiss. His tongue gently traces my lower lip and I feel his cool breath on my burning lips. His hands skim the sides of my body, his thumbs graze my breasts, which send a frenzy of heat coursing through me from head to toe.
Soon our kiss turns deeper and I dig my fingernails into the soft flesh of his back. His hands move down to my hips, causing an involuntary shudder to course through me and a low moan escapes my lips.
Caiden growls in response and grabs my hips, pulling me closer. When his bare skin touches mine, small pockets of heat explode, which sends an unquenchable fire coursing through my limbs. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I run my hands through his hair.
My throbbing lips leave the warmth of his as I lift my chin to the night sky. He leaves a trail of kisses on my jawline and gently nips on my earlobe before leaving love bites on my exposed neck. I pull his head closer, burying it into my neckline. Every part of my body explodes with a passion I've never felt before.
Continuing his trail of kisses down my collarbone, his fingertips trace the curves of my breasts and I arch my back in anticipation. His tongue flicks my nipple to a hardened peak. He looks up to me with a sultry gaze and teases me again. A yearning from deep within overpowers my senses. I need him.
Sitting up, I roll him over so he's lying on his back. As I straddle him with desire, I gaze into his eyes and stumble backward, falling off his lap. He rises and crouches over me, examining my naked body lying frozen in front of him. His eyes are a deep crimson red and I fear it isn't Caiden in control anymore.
"Caiden?" My voice is barely a whisper traveling on the cool breeze in the night air.
He stares into my eyes and pushes himself off me, falling onto his back. He lays still and silent. After several minutes, I curl up next to him for warmth and rest my head on his chest.
The spicy scent of bergamot washes over me, though there is no calming sense of protection. His arm doesn't wrap around me as it has before, providing the warmth of security. Instead, it hangs limp on the ground at his side. Caiden, where have you gone?
I wish I could relax and fall asleep under the moonlit sky, but my senses are on overload, listening to every small noise carried on the breeze. I watch over the Alpha as he lays motionless under my touch.
Sometime during the night I must have given in to sleep because I wake with my stomach twisting in knots from nervousness mixed with happiness as I peer at Caiden sitting a few feet from me. His elbows rest on his knees and his head hangs low in his lap.
“Is everything okay?” I ask, touching his shoulder. He flinches. Crawling around to look at him, I sit back when I notice a glaze in his eyes. My breath catches in my throat as I remember his state last night. But then I take a closer look. Tears.
“Caiden, what’s wrong?” I ask, my heart now frozen with worry.
“I’m sorry, Lucinda.” I grab his face, making him look at me.
“Sorry for what?” I ask, already knowing the answer. Last night was a mistake.
“Last night—”.
I cut him off before he can finish. “I know. Don’t worry about it, it’s no big deal.” He looks to me with wide, questioning eyes.
“I know you miss her, Elizabeth. I’m glad—" I bite my lip and continue, "You’ve already given me so much comfort, I’m glad I was finally able to reciprocate.” He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.
“I’m an Alpha, I shouldn’t have done that. I took advantage of you in the most feral way possible. If things would have escalated—" He runs his hands through his hair. "I don't know if I could live with myself."
"Well, you didn't get far," I say with a small shrug.
"How far is far?" He asks. Does he not remember?
"Second base. Like I said, not far." He nods, but I still can't tell what he remembers.
"I'm sorry, it’ll never happen again. You have a fated mate. That is a rare gift that shouldn't be thrown away or ignored.”
Crossing my arms over my chest, I smirk. “True. I have a mate who denies me every damn day."
“We should head back,” he says and I nod, unable to form words because of the lump in my throat. I knew there was something different about him last night, the look in his eyes. Hell, even his eye color ch
anged. But I still hoped a little part of him was there. Sigh. I waste no time shifting into my wolf and Caiden follows.
The run home was different. No playfulness, no racing, just running. He did not spare me a single look the entire run. I thought Dylan broke my heart years ago. Now the few parts that are still alive, just shattered.
Arriving back at the Pack House, Caiden heads in through the front door, straight to his room, I assume.
I decide to enter through the back door, this will give Caiden enough space away from me to sort things out. Standing in the doorway of the mudroom, I look around for something to wear. I reach for the robes they keep hanging by the back door just for this purpose, but no, that will not do. I'm not ready to go upstairs yet.
Instead, I find my tote bag, that I brought back from Felix's, right where I left it. Rummaging through it, I find a pair of black lace undies, a scoop neck gray tunic that hits me mid-thigh and a pair of black over-the-knee leg warmers. Interesting outfit, but it'll work in a pinch. I throw on the ensemble and head for the kitchen. I laugh to myself as I knowingly hear Mia's words echo in my mind. The vulgar things she's sure to say when she sees me.
I stop mid-stride as I enter the room. Dylan, shit. His jaw is set tight and his eyes are jet black.
“Where have you been?” he asks.
“Out running,” I say.
“You didn’t come home last night.” His eyes travel down my body.
I begin to fidget under his scrutinizing gaze, but then my inner wolf stops me. Things escalated fast last night and then stopped cold turkey. My wolf yearns with a burning desire I can't quench.
“Yeah, what’s your point?” Flipping my hair over my shoulder, I turn toward the fridge. From the corner of my eye, I see him sniff the air.
“Who were you with?” His eyes are as solid black as onyx.
“It’s of no concern to you,” I state matter-of-factly.
“I know you were with someone. I can smell your arousal!” He says through gritted teeth.
“Well, you see…the beauty of being rogue is that I’ve learned to take care of myself.” I smirk as I stalk toward him, licking my index and middle fingers for added effect. When I’m close enough to him I run my two wet fingers against his lips. I know what this will do to him. He is a kinky bastard in the bedroom and I like to push all his buttons. I know it's wrong to toy with his wolf like this. But I need a release and Dylan is the best target.
He grabs my hips, pulling me forward, nuzzling his head in the small of my neck, grazing his fangs over the sweet spot. My heart pounds, my stomach rolls, and my hands tremble under his touch.
“Mine,” he whispers against my skin. I moan with anticipation and my wolf yearns for his touch.
But he pulls back at the last moment and I startle at his eyes. Just a few moments ago they were solid black and now they are his luscious green.
“No. I’m sorry Lux. No.” He pushes me away. I raise my eyebrows and creases form on my forehead. He sniffs the air again and the muscles in his face tense.
“Caiden?” He asks. I freeze and feel a rush of heat travel up my neck and my lady parts begin to throb remembering the things Caiden did to me last night.
“What about me?” Caiden asks as he walks into the kitchen.
The heated look in his eyes as he takes in my appearance makes my insides quiver. My blush deepens as our eyes meet and lock into a stare. He looks refreshed and calm, but there is something different about him I can't pinpoint.
His lips turn up in the corners giving me a small, shy grin. He walks behind me, brushing his fingertips ever so lightly against my lower back as he passes. My breath catches as little shocks of electricity spread through my body at his touch.
Turning to look at him, his eyes are wide with surprise. He felt it too.
“Nothing,” Dylan growls looking between me and Caiden.
Chapter 22
Lucinda
My eyes narrow as I glare at Dylan. What does he have to be upset about? Letting out an audible sigh, I roll my eyes. I have caught him staring at me when he thinks I will not notice. Flaring my nostrils, I take a deep breath. He watches me with soft eyes and a boyish grin. Thinking of Sabrina, my lips pucker as I smirk, knowing he only looks at me that way.
Actually, I don't think he has given her much time since I've arrived. I know he's made up his mind about us, for whatever reason. I just wish he'd tell me why. Then maybe my wolf would settle down and accept his decision like I have. I realize I have been watching Dylan while lost in thought. Thank goodness he did not notice, as he is too busy grimacing at Caiden.
Following his intense stare, I watch Caiden as he makes breakfast. He's already pulled out several things from the cupboard and fridge. My tummy growls and two sets of eyes look at me. I quickly divert my gaze down to the ground.
"Sorry, I guess I'm a little hungry," I say. My eyes drift up and I see a smirk rise to Caiden's face. A low growl escapes Dylan as he watches Caiden whisk together the ingredients.
"Cinda! There you are, I've been looking for you." Mia rounds the corner into the kitchen. "Mmm, that smells delicious!" Her eyes widen and her lips curl in the corners.
"French toast," Caiden says, shrugging his shoulders. Mia's eyes sparkle.
"It's your specialty," she whispers. "You haven't made it since Eliza..."
"Yeah, well I felt like French toast this morning," Caiden says, successfully cutting her off.
"How are you?" She asks, walking across the room toward him. "Where have you been? I've been so worried. The whole pack's been worried."
"I'm fine. Better now." He glances my way before turning around to work on the stove. My heart flutters as our eyes briefly meet. His face was emotionless, giving nothing away. But I felt his wolf surge through the room to me. Dylan must've felt it too because a low growl erupts from his direction...again. I refuse to acknowledge him. He's been too much to deal with since the night of my rescue and our little heart-to-heart.
"Hey Mia, what are you doing today?" I ask, trying to change the subject. A day hanging out with my best friend is exactly what I need right now.
"Funny that you ask!" She says a little too high-pitched. "That's something I wanted to talk to Caiden and Dylan about."
As I listen to her, I stand up and get out plates, forks and knives, while she gets the syrup, butter, and powdered sugar. Caiden carries a platter of French toast to the table and we all sit down.
"Well, since we haven't had that cookout I wanted to have," she says, shoveling in a forkful of dripping wet French toast into her mouth. I furrow my brows at her.
"You know, so you can meet everyone and see if your mate's here," she says between bites. I almost drop the fork as my fingers falter. I wish I never told her that stupid story.
"Don't worry, Cinda," Mia says, giving me a wink and small smile, "I know you won't find him there." She glares at Dylan. Great, so she knows. My chest rises and I let out an audible sigh of relief.
"But I still think it would be good for everyone to meet you, and to see that their Alpha is alive and well," she adds along with another forkful.
"Yes," Caiden's voice breaks the awkward silence that's crept into the room. "It would be good." He looks to me and his face falters. Worry lines show at the corner of his eyes. What does he have to worry about?
"Hey, sugar!" Sabrina's silky voice enters the room. My eyes lift to Dylan, his shoulders straighten as he sits up taller.
"Hey Babe." He curves his arm around her waist, pulling her onto his lap.
"Sorry I'm late, did I miss breakfast?" Sabrina says, licking maple syrup from Dylan's lips.
"Mia, do you mind cleaning up? Dylan and I have some business to discuss." Caiden abruptly stands from the table and looks to me before leaving the room. Dylan follows him, only after giving Sabrina a juicy wet kiss, just for my benefit I'm sure.
Sabrina sits at his seat and grabs a piece of French toast from the platte
r. Picking it up with her hand, she eats it plain.
"So, what are you girls doing today?" she asks, waving the toast around in her hand as she speaks.
"Not much. Just grocery shopping for the cookout tonight," Mia says as she clears the table.
"Oh, right. I got the message," Sabrina says rolling her eyes. "It came through the mindlink loud and clear."
I stand and begin putting away the sugar, syrup, and butter. I feel a burning on my back and glance over my shoulder to find Sabrina shooting dagger eyes at me.
"You should shower. You reek," Sabrina says, almost in a snarl. My heart starts to pound. Is Caiden's scent on me that obvious?
"Sabrina, stop it." Mia walks toward the table with her hands on her hips. "You're jealous, just leave it alone."
"Me? Jealous?" Sabrina snarks, through fits of fake laughter.
"Yes, you," Mia says coolly as she lounges on the table with one hip. I remain where I am, standing behind the counter on the opposite side of the room.
"No, little girl. I have no reason to be jealous," Sabrina quips while standing up and leaning across the table—only inches from Mia's face.
"It's no secret you've always wanted my brother," Mia says, holding her stare.
"But now I've got Dylan and he's more of an Alpha than Caiden's turned out to be," Sabrina says in a hushed tone. "Everyone knows Dylan's the only reason our Pack is still alive. On occasion, Caiden loses touch with reality, and then disappears with no warning—"
"Wait! What?" I can't help but interject. Sabrina glares at me as I walk across the room.
"Do you really think Dylan will challenge Caiden for the Alpha title?" Mia's head snaps to me, her eyes wide with surprise.
"He'd be stupid not to." Sabrina shrugs. I sit down and lay my forehead against the oak table. Focusing my attention, I take a deep breath to combat the dizzy spell that threatens. My vision narrows, with the edges blurry and gray.
The Rogue's Fate Page 11