“Ilana,” Theo said.
“He knows what it’s really like out here. He knows the way,” Ilana said.
She was right. I didn’t want to admit it, but she was. Tommy, Amnah, and Mouse were our best bet.
“They don’t know you, though,” Theo said, his voice cracking. “They’re outsiders.”
“So am I,” Ilana said.
But only I heard her, because Amnah kicked her foot into the ground hard, sending pebbles scattering like shattered glass. “And that’s all we will ever be to you, right?” she asked.
“That’s not what he meant,” I said.
“We have to go,” Theo said to me. “Now. We’re wasting time.”
I started to walk, and so Ilana came, too. But Tommy stepped in our path. “I can’t let you do this. Listen, I know you hardly know me, but walking, that’s like suicide. Sincerely. You need to listen to me.”
Theo strode over. His breath came in sharp puffs. “We’re going,” he said to Ilana and me. “We had a plan, and we need to stick to it.”
“How well has that plan gone so far?” Tommy asked. His voice was soft and he continued to hold up both hands like Theo was some sort of wild animal and he wanted to show that he meant no harm. Maybe that’s how Theo seemed to Tommy and the others.
“Out of our way,” Theo said.
“I’m really not trying to be a jerk here, but I think you guys are over your head. I can get you a car. I can drive you there. We’ll be there in a couple of hours. No big deal. Okay?”
“We can’t steal,” I said.
Mouse put her hand on my arm. “It’s his uncle’s car lot.”
“What?” I asked.
“Yeah,” Tommy said.
“Why didn’t you just say so?” Ilana asked.
Tommy shrugged a little sheepishly.
“And his uncle can be a little lenient,” Amnah explained. She was sweating, too: little beads of it that gathered on her face like the red dots.
“Meaning?” Theo asked.
“Meaning we’re allowed to drive the cars from time to time,” Tommy said. “I mean, I’m supposed to stay on the lot, and I am supposed to ask first, but I think this is a special dispensation type of situation. Right? I mean, honestly, he’s already at the pub telling the story of the time these kids broke out of Old Harmonie and took a joy ride in one of his cars. And our Tommy helped them! Ain’t that the salt of it?” He spoke the last bit in a deep voice that I supposed was meant to be his uncle.
“I still don’t like it,” Theo said.
I turned so I was facing right at him. He was almost a head taller than me now, and I had to lean way back to see him. “We need to get there as soon as we can. We’re already so far away.”
“Taking without permission is still stealing.” He glanced past me to Tommy, Mouse, and Amnah. “We don’t know them, Mori. Not really.”
“They helped us. They helped Julia.”
Theo rubbed his head. His eyes had dark circles under them.
“We’re all exhausted, Theo. How are we going to make it all the way there on foot?”
I could see him giving in. He rubbed his head again, then looked over toward the cars. “All right. Fine.”
Tommy clapped his hands together. “All right! I knew you’d come around.” He grinned at Theo, but Theo didn’t smile back.
“Over here, Mouse!” Amnah called. “I think I found one.”
We had all spread out to look for possible cars. Tommy told us to look in the back part of the lot because these were the beaters—beat-ahs was how he said it—the cars that his uncle sometimes scavenged for parts. He’d be less likely to notice one was missing. I didn’t know what made a good candidate, so mostly I had trotted along behind Ilana, who peered into windows and under the hoods and eventually said, “I thought Theo was really going to lose it.”
“Maybe,” I said.
“He does have a temper,” she said.
“He wanted his mom to dampen it, but I guess it would’ve messed with his puzzle latency, so they wouldn’t do it.”
“Really?” she asked.
I didn’t get a chance to answer because that was when Amnah called and Ilana started jogging over to the car Amnah had found. I hurried to keep up.
“It needs a new camshaft, and that timing belt doesn’t look so hot, either,” Mouse said into the hood of a red car whose back was covered in stickers.
“You can tell all that just by looking?” I asked Mouse.
Mouse shoved her hands into her pockets. Her curls were matted down a little by sweat. “It’s a classic. They’re easier to fix.”
It didn’t matter how new or old the car was, I would not have been able to tell what was supposed to be there and what wasn’t.
“We’re gonna need gas. Probably,” Tommy said. “I can sneak up and nab some of that from my uncle’s tank out back.”
“Gas?” Theo asked. “These cars run on gas?”
“What do you expect them to run on? Rainbows and sunshine?” Amnah asked.
“Well, sunshine, yes,” Theo replied.
“Didn’t you hear her say these were classic cars?” Amnah asked. When she got angry, the red dots on her face flashed even brighter and angrier.
“Gasoline-powered vehicles were outlawed seventeen years ago,” Ilana said.
“For good reason, too. Do you know what that exhaust does to the atmosphere?” I asked. “I don’t think we can travel in a fossil fuel–powered vehicle.” As far as I was concerned, that was as bad as smoking or throwing an apple core into the garbage instead of the compost.
“No stealing, no fossil fuels, it’s like the Goody Two-Shoes Brigade around here,” Amnah said. “But whatever, suit yourself. Now Mouse and I can get going. We’ll be home in time for River Loves Zane.”
“Mori’s just exaggerating,” Theo said. He ran his hand across the top of the car and then looked down at his palm. I half expected the car to fall to dust. “Right, Mori?”
I stayed silent.
Ilana pulled open the front door of the car and slipped onto the front seat. The dashboard was full of measurement devices, and most of the left-hand side was covered by a big wheel. “What is all that stuff?” I asked.
Amnah looked at me across the hood of the car. “For real?”
“It’s a steering wheel,” Ilana said. “Steering wheel, odometer, speedometer.” She pointed at each as she named them.
“Wait,” I said. “Is one of us actually going to have to drive this car? Like operate it?”
“I cannot tripping believe this,” Amnah said, shaking her head.
“She’s never seen an old car before, give her a break,” Theo said. “None of us have, actually.”
Tommy put his hand on my shoulder. “Things are a little different out here, I guess. But, seriously, you won’t believe it—the power, the freedom of the open road. Killer.”
Theo said, “But Ilana is right. If we’re driving an illegal vehicle, won’t we be stopped immediately?”
“The regulations are a little softer than you might expect,” Tommy said. He tightened the pack he wore around his waist. “Anyway, I’m off to get some gas while you all salvage some parts and Mouse gets this wrecker rolling. You wanna come with me, Ilana?”
“No,” I answered for her at the same time that Theo stepped between Tommy and Ilana.
“I’ll be fine, Mori,” Ilana said. She looked Tommy up and down. “How’s he even going to try anything on me?”
Tommy held up his hands. “Not trying anything. Just thought you’d be able to help carry a can or two.”
“I’ll go,” Theo said.
“I’ll search for parts,” Amnah said. “Since I’m guessing you won’t be much help in that regard.”
That left Ilana, me, and Mouse back at the car. Mouse opened up her backpack and pulled out a wrench. She stood by the open hood of the car. It cast a shadow across her face and pulled her features into stark relief—the gentle slant of her nose and her
high cheekbones. It also made the scar across her cheek shine an eerie white. She looked down into the engine before she spoke. “I know Amnah can be a little rude.”
I leaned in closer to hear her soft voice.
“She’s just looking out for me. She has to speak for me a lot of the time. I get nervous and …” Mouse stopped talking and just shrugged.
“You talk to us okay,” I told her.
“You’re not too scary, Mori,” she said. “And it’s easier if I don’t have to look at you.” She bit her lip. “Sorry. Sometimes when I get going, I say too much. It’s like a seesaw, up to full tilt or down to nothing.” Her brown cheeks glowed redder and redder as she spoke, and finally she bit her lower lip as if to keep the words inside of her.
“I’m sorry we got you into this. If you want, you can go back. I mean, if you could get the car going first, that would be great, but after that we can make it on our own,” I told her.
She started tightening the bolts on the engine. Ilana watched over her shoulder. Her gaze flicked from part to part and I could tell that she was taking it all in. Her mind was putting the pieces together and in moments she would understand it as well as Mouse did—or almost, anyway. But not me. I sighed and looked down at the sandy ground. There was a small patch of clover and even a wilted dandelion.
“Dandelions grow up in the arctic,” I said. “When the ice is down. That’s how sturdy they are. Which is good, because they are the bee’s best friend.”
Mouse looked down at the dandelion. “A camshaft opens and closes the intake and outtake valves. Without it, you wouldn’t get the fuel where it needs to be in the right amount, and then the pistons won’t go and then the crankshaft won’t turn and your car won’t go anywhere.” As Mouse spoke she pointed at each part of the car. “It’s like any machine. All the parts have to work together. It’s kind of like a three-dimensional puzzle.”
“Theo would get it, then,” I said. “He’s good at puzzles.”
Mouse reached into the engine and pulled out two multi-toothed gears that were caked with rust and grime. Then she sat right down on the ground and picked up a flat rock and began chipping away at the crust.
“Need help?” Ilana asked.
“Sure,” Mouse said. She handed a gear over to Ilana, who began cleaning it. All I could do was stand there uncertain what to do with my hands.
“Where’d you learn to do all this?” Ilana asked as she chipped reddish black dust off the gear.
Mouse shrugged. She shrugged a lot. I guess it was easier than talking.
“That whole engine just looks like a mess of metal to me,” I said.
“It really isn’t so hard,” Mouse told us. “It’s like anything else: once you understand the general principles, you can apply them across disciplines.”
Mouse chewed on her lip and looked back down at the engine piece. She kept chipping away at the gunk on it. Ilana started cleaning hers again, too. I went back to feeling useless.
“I’m guessing Mouse isn’t your given name,” Ilana said.
Mouse shook her head. “Mercy Isabella.”
“That’s a big name for a small girl,” Ilana said.
“Yes.”
“Mercy is a pretty name, though,” Ilana went on.
“It is,” I agreed, because I didn’t want to sit there mute.
Mouse said, “My mom named me before she left.”
“Left?” I asked. “Where’d she go?”
Mouse looked past us, out over the field of cars.
“Did she get sick?” Ilana asked, her voice softer now.
Mouse shook her head. “She had to take a job down south after our dad passed.”
Ilana stared intently at Mouse. Maybe she was thinking about how they were both orphans of a sort. Mouse might have family she could live with, but they weren’t her real parents. Just like Ilana. And me, maybe I couldn’t forgive my parents or understand the choices they’d made, but at least I had them with me every night. Or I did until I left.
13
“Ladies, your gas is served,” Tommy said. And then he let out a huge, loud, impossibly long fart. This set him laughing so hard that he doubled over and held his stomach for a full minute before he said, “Good one, right? I was holding that in for hours, I think.”
“Hilarious,” Amnah said, her voice flat. She looked over at Mouse. “You okay?”
I didn’t have a sister, of course, but I suppose if I did, and if my parents weren’t around, I’d be protective of her the way Amnah was of Mouse. Ilana finished cleaning her gear and stood up. The palms of her hands had turned red from the effort, like she had been sorting wet berries.
“We also found a camshaft,” Theo said, holding out a slab of metal to Mouse.
This made her grin, ear to ear. Her teeth were crooked and not such a bright white as I was used to. She would get braces if she lived in Old Harmonie. “You like puzzles, I hear,” she said. “You think you know where this goes?”
“Mouse, come on, it’s not like we have all day,” Amnah told her.
But Theo leaned under the hood of the car. His face tightened and then he closed his eyes for a minute. I remembered what he had told me about it feeling like his brain was being pulled in a direction he couldn’t control. Was that happening now? “There,” he said, extending his long arm and pointing at the engine.
“Yes!” Mouse said. Then she turned to Amnah and stuck out her tongue.
Theo stood up and put his hands on his hips, but he didn’t say anything. Mouse leaned over. There was some clanging and banging, and then she said, “That’ll have to hold, I guess.”
“Then I’ll fill her up and we’ll let her rip. If you’ll pardon my reference to the previous gas attack.”
The sun had passed over its zenith. Amnah was right: we didn’t have all day. “Come on, then,” I said. “Let’s get this vehicle on the road.”
“Seriously, Mori. You have no idea what a joy you are in for,” Tommy said.
He was right. I had no idea.
Gasoline-powered cars are louder than the fans that power the wind generators at KritaCorp headquarters and louder than the sound of all the treadmills going during the fitness test. The rumble as the car started up shocked me. We were sitting in the back, four of us wedged into the back seat. I was half on Ilana’s lap and leaning against the window. Amnah and Mouse had the other half of the seat, but the sound didn’t seem to bother them at all.
The inside of the car was reddish brown. I think maybe it had been fully red at one time, but no longer. The front seats were deep burgundy and the back of the passenger one had a deep slice through it out of which gray foam padding sprouted. The roof of the car was fabric of that same burgundy color. It sagged in places and was covered with pills. If fabric could be sad, then this fabric certainly was.
I thought: I will be deaf when I get home and they won’t fix me because I don’t have enough of my percentage left.
Ilana put her arm around me.
And then we started moving. Which was even worse. We bounced and jerked and all I could see was the blue sky and the occasional cloud, so it felt like we were rocketing through the air.
I felt it in my bones from my toes to my skull. My jaw bore the brunt of it, vibrating at such a rate I wondered if I could knock my own tooth out.
I thought: this must be what it is like inside the old rock tumbler in the science lab at school.
Theo, who was sitting in the front passenger seat, turned around. “You okay?” he asked.
It seemed a wonder that I could hear him. “No,” I replied. I leaned my head against Ilana’s shoulder and pressed my molars together.
A drone flew through the field of blue that I could see, and even though I knew they were normal out here, my heart still beat hard and fast against my chest.
But then we hit the smooth road. We didn’t bounce so much. Ilana pressed a button that made the window go down and fresh air pressed against my face. This felt like going on the merry-
go-round back at the playground. The wind whipped my face and tangled my hair.
“We’re flying,” I whispered. All the KritaCars were sealed up with tinted windows to keep the inside environment pristine, the temperature consistent. Driving with the wind swirling through the car was a totally different experience. It made my stomach drop and soar at the same time. Terrifying and exhilarating.
I squeezed Ilana’s hand like that would let me hold on to the feeling. She squeezed my hand back and tucked her chin on my shoulder so she could feel the wind on her face, too.
“Pretty different from your wimpy KritaCars, huh?” Tommy asked. He tapped the dashboard. All I could see were his chubby fingers.
I tried to sit up a little higher so I could get a better view out the window. I saw a lot of trees at first. And poles with wires hanging between them. There were big signs, with pictures of people eating huge sandwiches or talking on their phones or riding strange-looking bicycles inside of bubbles. The pictures went by so quickly it was like watching a broken movie.
Faster, I wanted to tell Tommy. Go even faster. It felt like if we sped up we could spin right off the globe, like jumping off the merry-go-round or off the swings and flying, flying, flying before tumbling to the ground. Only in the car, we didn’t have to land. We could just keep soaring.
Then the trees and the signs gave way to nothing. Empty parking lots, an old baseball field, boarded-up businesses.
“The wasteland. Twenty years ago there was a big chemical spill,” Tommy explained from the driver’s seat.
“A Krita chemical spill,” Amnah added.
My soaring heart plummeted. I winced. First the reservoir and now this. How much land was Krita taking? Destroying?
“My uncle still owns property there,” Tommy said. “He says the ground will be clean in another fifty years. It’s my inheritance.”
“Land baron of the wasteland,” Amnah muttered.
Ilana shifted in the seat below me.
“Sorry,” I said.
“You’ve got a bony butt is all.”
My mom always said that on those few occasions when I still tried to climb into her lap. Usually when I was really tired or really sad. Bony butt girl. She wasn’t saying it to be mean. It always came with a snuggle. I wonder why they hadn’t changed that about me? Made me a little bit stronger. That could have protected me, too. But then, that was a physical change, and most of my 30 percent was already used up, gone into fixing my eyes.
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