by John Harding
“OK. You gotta stop getting involved with the posh bastard,” Robert Simmons demanded. “The Rees-Montague family are bad news. I said they would cause trouble.”
Paige screwed up her face. “I know you don't like the upper class, Dad, but he's fine.”
“He isn't. There is something wrong with that family.” Paige scoffed. “But I asked you, and now I am telling you, you will do as you are told,” her father shouted and Paige shook her head. “While you are under my roof …”
“I shall move out then,” Paige spat back and pulled out her mobile phone. “I shall go if I am not wanted at home.”
“Paige,” Hazel shouted, but Paige slammed the door as she departed and called Jack.
* * * * *
“Paige,” Andre demanded. The concert organisers have said you are not to go naked.”
“And what does Flee say? It is her concert.”
“I don't think it's relevant,” Andre told her. “Not relevant at all.”
“I think it is,” Paige told him, and the naked girl crossed her arms.
“And you are not to do the whole get on stage with clothes and take them off.”
Paige shrugged. “Would I do a thing like that?”
“They say they will cut you off if you start playing silly buggers, Paige. They've had complaints and legal letters. They don't want to lose their license, Paige. Just for once, please.”
“Sorry Andre, we told you that. I can't be clothed. It just doesn't feel right.”
“If you do strip, you could be arrested. All three of you.”
Paige sneered. “What again? You think they could come up with something a little more original.”
“How about jail,” Andre asked her. “Just for once, please, try and not get yourself on the news. Let's just do a gig and get home at a decent time, instead of phoning for a lawyer and then the Press Association.” Paige took a deep breath and groaned, grabbing her oversized T-shirt and putting it over her body. She shrugged and looked at Claire and Jack who reluctantly reached for their own garments. “Better,” Andre told them in a patronising voice. “And you got five minutes.”
Jack waited for Andre to leave their dressing room and looked at Paige. “How will you sing?”
“Naked,” Paige replied back. “But I got a few things to say first! And Flee's concert is going out live again, did you know that?”
“Yes, we did,” Claire told her, and they both glared at the grinning face of Paige. They didn't get any time to question their uncontrollable lead singer as she led them from their dressing room to the side of the stage and then onto the stage with a deafening roar, interspersed with a few boos.
“Hi,” Paige said into the microphone and looked over the audience. “Bet'cha all wondering why I'm clothed. Well the organisers have had some complaints and have said that unless I am covered up they will cut our session, and I will be arrested.” The few boos turned into a torrent of angry hisses and jeers, directed towards the concert organisers. “Of course, they are not the only people not to understand naturism. Christian Outrage, Peter Moran …” Paige waited for the animated booing and catcalling to die down before continuing. “My brother is in hospital at the moment because three guys beat him up. They are gay, and my brother said 'no' to them, but they thought he was gay as he went to naturist camp sites. This is stupid, but if any gay guy wants a piece of teenage arse, just ask for Leroy, Gavin or Dan in Croydon … and then maybe they will leave the rest of us alone.” Paige giggled as the crowd listened and she looked towards her two bandmates. “They are as bent as you can get. Right guys, start with Hot and Cold?”
They nodded, and she turned back to the audience. “Just one more thing …” Paige put the microphone on its stand and pulled her T-shirt from her waist and over her head, before throwing it into the audience. “To every concert organiser, policeman, talk show host and religious nutter out there: I DON'T SING CLOTHED.” She looked up at the sky and shrugged as the crowd whistled in delight and she waited for the intro for her first song as Jack and Claire disrobed behind her. “And I won't be told what to do by small-minded bigots,” she said firmly before launching into her first song.
Paige managed the first half of the song before the power to their instruments was cut, and a harassed man ran onto the stage. “Get dressed!” He ordered.
“No,” Paige shouted to cries of boos around them. “Listen to them. They came to see the Bare Necessities.”
“You've got to get dressed. Your agent promised.”
“Yeah well he lied. He's an agent. Get used to it.”
“I cannot let you continue.” Paige picked up the microphone and waved it in front of her.
“Paige,” Jack called. “Perhaps …”
“I can't sing,” the animated teenager shouted. “They came to see us sing. You want us to go home?”
He stumbled as the booing and jeering turned angry and he put his hands together. “Please.”
“No,” Paige shouted. “Turn our power back on or we go home.” He backed away as Paige advanced towards him and the crowd's jeers turned to cheers.
A few moments later the power was restored and Paige's shouting towards a man at the front of the crowd was broadcast through her microphone. “… nipples can get a bit hard, but it's fine really.” She stopped as the stadium erupted into laughter and Paige took the microphone again. “Shall we start again,” Paige asked and looked towards Andre in the wings. “Now the concert organisers have said we can sing naked.” Andre shook his head but Paige smiled. “A song for our agent I think, Don't Hate Us.”
* * * * *
Jack pushed the newspapers towards her, but Paige was busy reading the tabloid newspaper to notice. “Are Jack and Paige the Bare Ne-kiss-ities?” Paige called out. “Oh my God. They think we are going out.” She glared at Lucinda who sank into her seat.
“Yeah I said I'm sorry. It just sort of came out.”
“Yeah well, that's got us on page four and five. I must say, Jack, I think they've done you a favour on the size of the star that covers your … ahem … little man. That star is unreasonably massive.” Jack glanced over and looked at the picture where everything from his bellybutton to his knees was covered with a yellow star. “The things over my assets are, unfortunately, a bit smaller.”
Jack laughed. “Well according to the story I am very fond of your assets,” he replied. Lucinda peered over the top of the story and giggled.
“Well it's all very well having love stories, but look what they've written about me. That slimy Peter Moran.” Paige took the cheap tabloid from their guitarist and scanned the page until she reached the bottom story on their nemesis's column. “Is Claire Baynes still anorexic?” Paige read. “What is that man smoking?”
“They've digitally altered the two photos,” Claire moaned. The first was taken from their first video and the second taken a couple of days ago in concert, and it was clear Claire had lost some weight, but the effect had been magnified by the newspaper's editing suite. “I was never that fat in the first video. And I am not on a lettuce diet at all, I hate the stuff.”
“Hey,” Lucinda simpered. “Don't worry about it. Nobody believes what they read in the papers anyway.”
“But it's not right. This is a lie and an invasion.”
“We could go and see them,” Jack offered. “Go in and give the editor a bollocking. I mean, Paige's had some experience with that.”
“Or Peter Moran. I did say I would come after him if he touched Claire again,” Paige replied. “This is just him trying to poke me.”
“They just want a reaction,” Lucinda told the three of them. “Don't rise to it. Get your agent to put out a statement that they will have to cover, or put a measured response on your website.”
Claire snorted and picked up two more papers. “I see Christian Outrage have said they have filed a complaint with the Police,” Jack announced. “Said that when we stripped at Flee's concert that we broke the law and that they will bring a
private prosecution if the Police fail to prosecute.”
“Oh for Christ's sake,” Paige moaned. “Surely there is a way to stop these bastards. I mean, what is their problem?”
“You,” Claire muttered. “You antagonise them.”
“And why do all the pictures in the papers make us look like escaped criminals?”
“Oh look, we are in the Herald as well,” Jack muttered. “And that's a far lovelier picture, apart from the small one there … you look so angry in that one!”
Paige turned to have a look. “I'd just had a row with my Dad at the 'ospital,” she said with an aggressive lilt to her voice. “He had a bit of a go about something, and I, sort of, lost it.”
“You never told me what was said. You just said you'd had a bit of a row and wanted to move in for a few days.”
Paige sighed. “He hates your family, but I don't know why. Do you know why my Dad hates your family so much? Other than you being posh bastards.”
Jack laughed at her expression, but he looked up as Lucinda gave a nervous cough. “You’ll find out eventually,” she supposed and looked down at the floor.
“Find out what?”
“Your Dad, Paige, was my first husband,” she admitted. “The naturist, I told you about. And he didn't like my brother much.”
Chapter XXI
“What do you mean, your first husband?” Jack asked loudly, and Lucinda shrugged.
“Well I sort of hoped it wouldn't come out,” the woman muttered. “You know I said I had a husband who was a naturist. I did mention it.”
“Yeah, but not my dad!”
“OK,” she blustered. “OK, I'll be back in a minute,” she promised and walked out of the room, coming back with a photograph album as Jack and Paige looked at each other. “Look.” The pale blue album was tatty, and Lucinda passed it to her nephew. Jack looked up, and she shrugged. “I should have told you before, but I wasn't sure if you wanted to know.”
Paige gulped. “I didn't even know my dad was married before mum.”
Lucinda nodded. “It didn't end too well.” She pulled out a glass from the cupboard and filled it full of alcoholic spirit, before sitting down at the table.
“Isn't that a bit much?” Claire asked, but Lucinda shook her head.
“I need it,” she replied and watched as Paige opened the album of wedding pictures. Staring back at her was an extremely young Lucinda in a beautiful white dress standing next to her father. Young Robert Simmons had considerably more hair than Paige was used to seeing him with and he beamed at the camera.
“That's mum,” Paige told her, pointing at one of the bridesmaids. “Isn't it?”
“Yes, she was a family friend of your father's family. He had no sisters, and … ummm … well I got shunned by my friends and family, so it was natural really. Funny that his future wife attended his first marriage.” She gulped and watched as they turned page after page, gulping her fiery drink and squinting. The album contained many naturist photographs of the married couple, always beaming at the camera.
“So what happened?”
Lucinda gulped. “In truth, I was weak. He worked at the factory that Paul eventually took over from our dad. And I met him on the Christmas do. I was sixteen, and he was a couple of years older.” She took a few more swigs of her drink and wiped her eyes. “He was great. But Dad was against the marriage, and that meant Paul was. We got married, and Dad boycotted the wedding. Our friends shunned us, and … and,” she gulped and squeezed her hands together. “After a year, Dad withdrew his support. He told Robert that unless we divorce, he would lose his job, and I would lose my inheritance.”
Paige rubbed Lucinda's hand and the woman squeezed it. “That's … awful.”
“Yeah. And we had a few rows. I told him that I didn't care about my inheritance, but Robert said he couldn't do that to me, and within a few days Paul came to see us and Robert was gone. I mean, I cried for days. Weeks. Dad said he thought he knew best and set me up with some junior doctor.”
“And that lasted how long?”
“Not very, Dad died shortly afterwards. But by the time I found Robert again, he was with your mother, Paige. And that was that. I spoke to him and he just lost it, telling me that my family were evil and he never wanted to see me again.”
“That's terrible,” Jack told her, and Lucinda nodded.
“It was. I just wished we'd both been stronger, but we were too young.”
“So that's why Dad hates your family,” Paige told Jack. “Well I hope he realises that I am not going to be like him, and you aren't like your grandfather.”
“It was Paul as well. He turned into his father and as the supervisor he was always on Robert's case. He was itching to sack Robert. And after we got divorced, Robert was thrown out of the factory. He was a union leader as well, so they truly hated him.” Paige took a deep breath and wiped her face.
“So I get it. But that was a long time ago.”
“They did their best to ruin him,” Lucinda said in a low voice. “You forget that the factory was the biggest employer in the area. If he was sacked from the factory, then he would struggle to get another job. Which is what happened and why you had to move away. He had to move a few miles away.”
Paige gulped. “But that's evil.”
“It was,” Lucinda admitted. “And I saw it happening and tried to say something, but no-one would listen. And I just gave up once he left our little house.”
Paige sighed and rubbed her eyes. “I guess I better go and see my Dad.”
* * * * *
“I'm sorry,” Claire's mother told her. “But it is just causing too many problems. And we don't want you to stop but …” Her voice trailed off and she cleared her throat. “It's Paul. He says that unless you and Jack stop I can't have my job back and …” She wiped her eyes. “I'm so sorry, but he's made an allegation that I stole some stuff from him.”
Claire gulped. “You can't be … why would he do that?”
“Because he's nasty,” Teri snapped, and tears flowed down her cheek. “He wants me to make you stop.”
“But it's Jack's choice. I can't make him stop.”
“He says that he wants you and Paige to throw him out the band. Replace him. And then he'll go back home. And he will withdraw the allegation's he’s made. But until then …” Claire's eyes fell on a letter Teri has holding.
“What's that?” Claire asked and saw the “FINAL DEMAND” written in bright red ink across the top of the paper. “What's happening?”
“Oh, it's nothing. And I know you and Jack are friends, and you like his company,” her mother started.
“I am not throwing him out the band. I am not doing that.”
“Claire. I've never asked you for anything before. So please, I'm begging you. Help me. I need you to do this one thing for me. I know you don't want to stop, and that Paige is a delightful girl, but …”
“But we are good,” Claire told her mother. She wavered, and Claire crossed her arms. “We are good. We get lots of radio airplay. People say we are just a novelty act but we are loved by the radio stations so it's not. You can't expect us to walk away from that.”
Teri wiped her eyes. “Claire. Think about George and …”
“Is it money?” Claire asked. “We got money for doing the gig at Wembley and sales on iTunes and all sorts. It's all in a bank account at the moment, but we can get at it. If it's the money …”
“It's not just the money,” Teri replied. “I am not a charity case. I just need you to stop antagonising my employer. Or I could go to prison.” Teri's face contorted. “If he makes a complaint to the Police, who are they going to believe? I'm proud of you, and I hate myself for asking, but please, please Claire, just think about it.”
Claire shook her head. “Sorry Mum,” she said slowly and closed her eyes waiting for the reaction. When nothing was said, she looked up to see her mother sobbing in the armchair. “But we will help financially,” she told her. “That's not a problem.”<
br />
“I’m not a charity case,” Teri shouted at her daughter. “I don’t want your money.” Claire said nothing and Teri threw the letter on the floor and took a few deep breaths. “Go on, go back to your band,” she yelled.
Claire didn't waste the opportunity and dialled Jack as she left. “Jack, is there any chance I could stay with your Lucinda? Just for a few days?”
* * * * *
Paige stopped outside her family flat and hesitated. She wasn't sure what sort of reaction she would get, but slowly put her key in the lock and opened the door. She could hear the television from the front room and gently walked up the stairs. Her heart was pounding in her chest, but the young singer was in dire need of additional clothes and had returned to take a few more of her belongings.