by Jane Charles
That sucks. “But you still attend the ballet?”
She smiles again, except it’s a little sad. “Every chance I get.” Ellen turns to look at me, a mischievous twinkle in her brown eyes. “I still can’t be believe they let an uncultured jock like you into a school like Baxter.” She pulls off the road into a parking lot of a country diner and turns off the engine.
Ellen
We slide into a booth beside the long windows facing the parking lot and a waitress puts glasses of water on the table and menus in front of us. This place looks like it hasn’t changed from the fifties, with the long counter with stools and the kitchen behind the wall with the opening to slide food through. There is a guy back there, white ticket orders hanging above his head and he’s placing plates in the opening for the waitresses to pick up. Steam rolls up and it sounds like he’s frying a burger. The stools and the booth seats are covered in red vinyl and I bet they have the best milkshakes around.
“If your grandparents bought you a car for your undergraduate, what did they get you when you earned your masters?’
My heart squeezes tight and painfully. “Nothing. They died before I graduated.”
He sobers and sympathy flashes in his eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“I wasn’t lying about issues arising from the estate.” I still feel their loss. They are the only ones who stood by and supported me when I did what I felt I had to do. “They’re the reason.” I finally whisper.
Gabe leans forward. “For what?”
“Why I didn’t go into…” I trail off, hoping he get it.
He’s frowning and then a light dawns in his eyes. “Why?” he asks quietly.
“I would have never seen them again.”
He just nods and I’m pretty sure he gets it.
“Look, let’s talk about something else.” I glance around. The diner is full of people. I know I’m being paranoid, and irrational, but I can’t be too careful right now.
The waitress comes over to take our order. I glance at Gabe. “Mind if we get it to go.”
He smiles at me. “No problem.”
As soon as our order arrives, we leave and take to the road again. I’m pretty sure there’s a park around here somewhere.
“Are you close to the rest of your family?”
It’s a legitimate question. “They don’t speak to me.” He might as well know everything. “My sister, brother and mother blame me for ruining their lives. Mom couldn’t go to her country club anymore and she wasn’t invited anywhere, ever, and lost all of her dearest friends.” I snort. “If they were truly friends, they would have stuck by her, but that wasn’t the case. They all used each other to be seen with the right people, at the right events, and all that.” It was rather disgusting. I don’t think my mother ever had a true friend. Just people she could use to be more accepted. “My sister, who is six years older than me, was engaged at the time. Her fiancé broke it off.”
“That sucks,” Gabe says.
“She doesn’t deserve your sympathy,” I point out. “Her fiancé said it was because she was more upset about me destroying the family than she ever was about Father’s immoral and illegal activities. She wasn’t the person he thought she was and he couldn’t be with someone like that.” I still shake my head over what she thought the real problem was, but I shouldn’t be surprised. I’ve known her my entire life and if anyone took after mom in everything, it was my sister. “Candice simply blames me causing her to lose the love of her life. I think she was more interested in his bank account and that she wouldn’t have to marry down, more than she ever was in George.”
“What about your brother?”
“He was being groomed to take over when father retired. He ended up testifying to save his own ass and no other reason.” I grab the chocolate milkshake sitting in my cup holder. It’s so damn good. “He’s lucky he isn’t in prison too. He knew what Father was doing and didn’t see anything wrong, though he claimed on the stand that he didn’t have a choice and was afraid to speak out.”
I take a sip and the coolness slides down my throat. Perfection.
“I can’t believe we are the same blood. If I didn’t have proof, I’d insist I was adopted.”
“Where are they now, really?”
“Don’t know. For their testimony they were also offered witness protection. They went in to start over. I didn’t.”
“You were close to your grandparents, though,” he reminds me. “Your mom’s parents or your dad’s?”
“Mom’s,” I answer. “Father’s died when I was little.” I grin. “Mom’s parents hated my dad from the moment Mom brought him home. They did everything they could to discourage the marriage until the two up and eloped to Las Vegas and never came back except to visit.”
“Did your grandparents live in Nevada?”
They lived in heaven. Or in my mind it was at least close to it. “Napa. They owned two vineyards.”
Gabe turns toward me and I look at him out of the corner of my eye. I know what he’s wondering. “Do you like wine?”
“You own vineyards?”
“No. They were sold to couples who helped manage them for the past thirty years. I like wine, but have no clue how to run a vineyard.” I glance at him, his mouth is partially open in disbelief. “It’s only right that they take over after all the years they dedicated to my grandparents and, it’s not like I can visit.” I really shouldn’t be telling him any of this. Scott told me I couldn’t tell him. But, Gabe figured it out on his own so he might as well know all of it. “You aren’t going to tell anyone, are you?”
“They’re your secrets to tell. Not mine.” He sighs and leans back. “So, how did you end up in New York?” he asks, changing the subject.
“I had to get out of Nevada. And, I really want four specific seasons, you know with the trees changing, snow on the ground, flowers blooming.”
He laughs. “Did you ever go back?”
“Nope, and I never will.”
The entrance of the park is just up ahead and I pull in and find a parking spot. For it being such a nice day hardly anyone is here. Gabe grabs the sack and I get the drinks and walk to a close picnic table and open the wrappers to our food. Gabe tears open little packets of ketchup and squeezes it out.
“It was hard being so far away from my grandparents though. They visited, but it wasn’t the same after I moved out. I used to spend weeks at the vineyard until I moved in with them.”
“You lived with them?” He seems kind of surprised.
“Well I couldn’t stay with my family after what I did.”
“Exactly, what was that?”
Gabe – 27
She goes silent and bites into her burger and I assume she’s not going to tell me the how. I get that. Ellen’s probably not supposed to be telling me any of this. Or, maybe she doesn’t want to talk about it anymore. I can’t really blame her. It must bring up a lot of shitty memories.
But, I want to know. I want to know everything there is to know about Caroline Elizabeth Elaine Westbrook, now known as, Ellen West.
“I’m sorry.”
She blinks up at me. “For what.”
“For being an ass in New York.”
She shakes her head. “You didn’t have the facts.”
“I shouldn’t have accused you have having Scott on the side. I just got so fucking jealous. That’s never happened to me before.”
She giggles. “You were jealous of Scott?”
“He’s a nice looking guy,” I answer defensively.
“And old enough to be my father.” She bites into a fry.
Maybe it isn’t all lost. I’d like a do-over with Ellen. I really would. Those feelings that were building a few days ago are still there. Maybe when we get back, we can go to her apartment, stretch out on her bed and see what happens. That’d be nice. Real fucking nice.
“So, do you read between the lines a lot?” There’s a twinkle in her eyes and I suspect she’s done a bit of it herself.
�
�The truth is always in what isn’t said,” I say. “The news went to great lengths discussing the various testimony of the witnesses, except you were an enigma, testifying in private. They discussed how the story was broken, but nobody had an answer. Half of the reporters are convinced it was you. The other half dismissed the possibility on account of your age and relationship to the defendant.”
She’s nodding. “They all thought I was so innocent and trusting. More interested in ballet than anything else. It worked, for some at least.”
“Well, it was obvious to me.”
“I don’t think anyone, my family included, ever gave me enough credit. Even after what had happened. I made everything worse for my family. Not enough common sense to keep my mouth shut. Yet, they never once blamed my father.”
“Except for your grandparents,” I remind her
A sad smile pulls at her lips. “Yeah, my grandparents.” She looks up and into my eyes. “You’re really not going to tell me anything about Baxter are you? I’m going to have to work for it?”
“Just read between the lines, Ellen. That’s all you have to do.”
Ellen
I’ve tried but there are none. At least not what I’ve seen.
“Did you research Mag and her family?”
“Yeah.” I tell him what I learned last night.
He’s nodding.
“Is the connection between the suicide and the school, or just a coincidence?”
Gabe just shrugs.
Damn him. Why won’t he just answer a straight question? “Between the lines, huh?”
Again he nods.
“Okay, why aren’t you really at work today? I know you’re needed, you’re not sick and I don’t think you’d call in sick if you weren’t.” Not that I know that for sure.
Gabe just smiles before biting into his burger.
“Fine!” I hiss. “We’ll do this your way.”
He takes a sip of his Coke not saying a word.
“I saw you in your fourth hour class. I kind of think that was okay, except there was arguing before I got there.”
He straightens. “What did you hear?”
“Just raised voices. I couldn’t make out what was being said.”
He relaxes again.
“A counselor stays behind and then the two of you come into lunch.”
He takes another bite of his burger, not adding anything.
“You were still pissed at me, didn’t want to talk and left a half-eaten lunch and stormed out.”
“I didn’t storm out.”
“Yes you did.” I wink at him.
He just takes another bite, shaking his head.
“Then, I saw you during your last class – for the newspaper.”
He crumples up the hamburger paper and tosses it in the sack.
“Then that kid, Isaac, comes in and things got strange.”
“It was just a surprise to see him.”
I stare at Gabe. Between the lines he said. Every single person in the room, except me, even the kids, got tense and silent when Isaac and Gabe knew each other. I still don’t get why it’s a big deal. But that is one key. “You’re not at school because of Isaac.”
His eyes shift away from me, but Gabe says nothing.
“You didn’t get fired did you?”
“Nope.”
“Laid off.”
“No.”
“Paid leave?” I’m fishing and guessing.
He says nothing but looks me directly in the eye.
Now we’re getting somewhere. “Why?”
Gabe just shakes his head.
“Is he the same Isaac who was in a coma after the lightning strike?”
Gabe’s jaw tenses and his nostrils flare, but he says absolutely nothing. Of course, he doesn’t have to. His answer is in the hard planes of his sculpted face.
“Will you get fired if you tell me?”
“Most definitely.”
Well, that sucks. I’m dying of curiosity. It’s the journalist in me, but I’m not going to put his job in jeopardy.
“When you have time, just think back over your observances yesterday.” He grabs the sack with our garbage and tosses it in a can. “Don’t think about it now, let’s just try and have fun.”
I look up at him. “You still want to have fun with me.”
There’s a softening in his blue eyes. “If you can forgive me for being such an ass?”
“And you forgive me for slapping you?”
“Forgive me for being secretive about Baxter, and don’t press?”
“Forgive me for not be honest about who I am?”
He places his hands against my cheeks, caressing them with his thumbs, looking into my eyes before he lowers his mouth. My heart melts and everything calms the moment his lips touch mine. Once again, everything is how it should be. How I need and want it to be. I let him linger, tasting him as he tastes me, and tears spring to the back of my eyes as I pull away.
“What’s wrong?”
“We can’t be together.” He deserves the truth.
“Why the hell not?”
Taking his hand, we walk, and I explain the reason Scott needed to see me. How they will use anyone I care about if they can, to hurt me, or make me recant my story. “My family took the offer to disappear. Nobody can find them, but they could find you.” By the time he’s finished, Gabe is stiff and a bit angry, but I don’t think it’s at me.
“I’ll decide what is safe for me and what’s not.” He kisses me again. “This, whatever it is, is not going to be ruined by a criminal. I want to be with you, Ellen.”
“Even if you could get hurt?”
He laughs. “If lightning doesn’t kill me, nothing will.”
“So, was that the second injury? The articles didn’t exactly say how you were injured.”
“Knocked me right off of my feet and I came down on my knee.”
“You’re lucky that’s all that happened.”
He sobers. “Yeah, I was the lucky one.”
Gabe – 28
I take her hand and we start to stroll with no particular destination in mind. It’s easy to forgive the lies and the slap, knowing what I know now. Though, I may not be so forgiving if Ellen strikes me again. I’ll have to see if she has a tendency to strike. That is one thing I most definitely do not want to experience again. But, I get why she did it, kind of. I was an ass, she was upset, Scott had just turned her world upside down and put her in a state of fear. Under normal circumstances or a regular argument, I’m pretty sure she isn’t the type to strike out.
But, how can I really know for sure?
I glance down at her. “Do you make it a habit of slapping guys who piss you off?”
Her face turns beet red. “I’ve never struck anyone in my life. I have no idea what came over me.”
I give her hand a squeeze. “I forgive you.” Leaning in, I kiss her on the cheek.
“Shouldn’t I be the one who should be kissing you?” Ellen turns and puts her fingers against my cheek, caressing gently. “It was here, right?”
“Yeah.” My voice is gruff and my cock gets hard. I want her, but not here. A public park isn’t exactly private and I don’t need an arrest for indecent exposure on my record. Not that I’ve ever been arrested, but I’m not ready to start a rap sheet either.
Ellen goes up on her toes slightly, and places her warm lips against the spot she had slapped less than a week ago. I turn my head, catching her lips with mine. She leans in, wrapping her arms around my neck. I deepen the kiss, our tongues tangling. Grabbing her about the waist, I lift Ellen and she wraps her legs around my hips. She’s rocking her pussy against my hard cock.
A car pulls into the park and she jumps away from me, her cheeks turning pink. I grab her hand and we continue walking.
What is it about Ellen that I can’t keep my hands off of her?
I blow out a breath, trying to relax. “In light of how quickly things moved before, perhaps we should take this slo
w.” I can’t believe I’m suggesting this, but I don’t want a repeat of a great night only to crash when I find out other secrets that are equally destructive. Maybe there aren’t any secrets, but I can’t afford to risk it. Especially since she’s still set on nosing around Baxter.
I’m confident that even if she did learn the truth, it would never be reported in her blog. But, that isn’t my call. I signed a confidentiality agreement and my job is already on the line.
But, what do I tell Mag?
If it was up to me, I’d make sure Ellen’s secrets were locked up tight. It’s because she was allowed on campus in the first place, Mag needs to know that somebody has fucked up in the main office, and that could be very dangerous. Of course, Mag already figured that out with Isaac, but she needs to know that the people coming on the campus are not being vetted as they should. Hell, anyone could walk on. It wouldn’t be the first time a parent, other relation, gang leader or even a pimp hadn’t tried to get a kid back and that cannot happen under any circumstance.
I can’t tell Ellen why I need to talk to Mag, or what I need to tell her. She’ll just question me further, of that I have no doubt. And, I’m still not sure how much I’m going to tell Mag about Ellen.
I’ve been put in a fucking impossible situation. I know both their secrets and if I could tell the other, the mess would be cleared up. But, I can’t. They are not my secrets to tell.
But what’s more important are the students. They far outweigh losing Ellen’s trust and ruining what could be a fantastic relationship. I just hope she doesn’t hate me when she finds out.
I glance back down at her. We’re just strolling through the park, hand in hand, and not really saying anything. I like it. A lot. Being with Ellen is so damn easy. I connected with her the moment we met, as if something in me recognized what I needed in her. Maybe that’s why I was so out of character with jealousy in New York. Sure, she lied, which is something I hate more than anything, but she has good reason.
At least she’s forgiven me. I have nothing to forgive her for. I get her secrets and feel kind of special that she told me. It couldn’t have been easy. I just hope this isn’t the last pleasant day we spend together, and why we won’t sleep together again. At least not until after I talk to Mag, after I determine what exactly to tell her, and Ellen forgives me. If she ever does.