Darkest Dreams

by Jennifer St Giles

  “I’ve heard Bridget rail about how blind men are, and I’m beginning to believe her.” I drew an exasperated breath, feeling very much like saying a word ladies weren’t supposed to use; a word Bridget, Cassie’s friend who made an unforgettable lady’s companion at Killdaren’s Castle, frequently uttered. “Lord Alexander didn’t kill Lady Helen, and he didn’t try to kill Sean either. I know it as surely as I know my own name.”

  Still, I felt strange making the declaration, for though I believed in Alexander’s innocence with every fiber of my being, I’d not been able to read his thoughts and emotions to know it was true.

  “Sean didn’t kill Lady Helen either, nor did he want his brother to die during their fight. But I don’t think Sean will let himself admit that. If he did, he’d have to forgive himself, and for some reason he can’t. It’s easier to blame the Dragon’s Curse for what happened eight years ago.”

  “The whole situation gives me a headache.” I sighed. “There has to be a way to manipulate both of them into admitting they are wrong.”

  “Not as long as the viscount stays locked in his castle and Sean in his,” Gemini added, having overhead the last of our conversation. “Oh look, there’s Lord Ashton and Mr. Drayson at the market with the Earl of Dartraven and Sir Warwick. Why, they’re nearly standing next to our carriage. I will wait for you two there,” she said, taking off before Cassie or I could say a word.

  As the carriage was only a short distance away, and the Earl of Dartraven, Sean and Alexander’s father, would be chaperone enough for Gemini, I turned my gaze back to Alexander. He stood surveying the wild horse on the deck of the ship, managing to look like an impregnable fortress.

  “How can we get past Sean and his brother’s defenses?” Cassie murmured.

  “Trojan Horse,” I whispered softly as an utterly intriguing idea flared inside me. Weeks ago, long before Cassie and Sean announced their intention to marry, Alexander had mentioned that the generations of artifacts at his castle needed to be catalogued. We’d even spoken at length over dinner the last time I’d seen him about possibly hiring me to do cataloguing.

  I was desperate to escape being in close quarters with Cassie and Sean. It wasn’t that I resented the happy couple, but more that I felt as though I were intruding on their privacy. Too often, when I inadvertently touched Cassie, I felt her private emotions or thoughts. Cataloguing would provide me with a way to spend time on my own, to regain the inner peace I’d lost over the last few months.

  The burden of being able to see so much from the minds of those around me grew larger despite my efforts to escape knowing.

  “Trojan Horse? Andrie, you’re not making sense.” Cassie peered at me as if I’d spoken Greek. “You’ve spent entirely too much time with antiquities.”

  I squeezed her hand. “We need a Trojan Horse to get inside Lord Alexander’s castle.”

  Cassie paused, then slowly nodded as realization dawned. “I see. And wherever are we going to find one?”

  I smiled. “You’re looking at it. Me. It’s time for the Killdaren family to catalogue their treasures, don’t you think?”

  “You’re a genius.” Cassie laughed, and a ray of hope lit her troubled gaze. Then her smile faltered. “I’m not so sure that it’s a good idea after all.”

  “Why? Surely you still don’t think he had anything to do with Lady Helen’s death?”

  “No. Not since you read Alexander’s thoughts on the matter. I’m worried about you.”

  I hadn’t read Alexander’s thoughts. Cassie had just assumed that I had when we’d argued about which brother could have been responsible for Lady Helen’s death. I’d yet to tell Cassie that I couldn’t read Alexander’s thoughts. I didn’t want her to doubt his innocence. “What do you mean?”

  “You developed feelings for him when we were searching for the truth about Mary. Am I wrong?”

  “Was it that obvious?”

  “Only to me. You usually go to great lengths to avoid contact with strangers. You didn’t with him. That he’s treated us like the plague since learning of my engagement and marriage to Sean has to have hurt your feelings. I know something has had you out of sorts lately.”

  “With so much time on my hands, I’ve been restless,” I said, hoping she wouldn’t press for more. “Cataloguing will be just the thing to set me back to rights. Come on.” I pulled her toward Alexander. “The viscount won’t be able to refuse to speak to us. Not in so public a place.”

  “I’m not so sure about that,” Cassie muttered.

  I wasn’t sure how Alexander would greet us, either. My nerves fluttered more than his dark hair did in the sea breeze. Seeing him coatless and daring in public made me readily believe many of the rumors about him. The Killdaren family was noted for flouting traditions and living well outside society’s strictures, and the gossip I’d heard about Lord Alexander Killdaren indicated he was the boldest of the lot.

  He stood at the end of the loading ramp with his back to us, apparently watching the spirited horse prancing on the deck of the ship. The magnificence of the beast had captured almost everyone’s attention, and would have had mine as well were it not for the man before me and the way the cloth of his shirt stretched tautly across his broad shoulders, barely masking the supple grace and power of his body beneath. The tailored fit of his breeches followed the line of his body along his trim hips and down the sinewy length of his legs, leaving little to the imagination.

  My cheeks flamed more hotly than the sun, a condition that worsened when Lord Alexander turned my way. His gaze slid slowly over me, and all thought left my mind.

  “A beautiful day, my lord.” Cassie smiled brightly.

  “Ladies.” He nodded his head at my sister, his manner cordial and respectful, if reserved. “I hear you’re Mrs. Killdaren now.”

  “Happily so, and please call me Cassie,” Cassie replied, notably relieved he didn’t publicly ignore us. “After all, we are family now.”

  “Yes, we are.” He frowned and fell silent, as if either at a loss over what to say, or perhaps hoping we’d continue on our way. After an awkward moment, he added. “The sea air appears to agree with you both. You’re looking well since I last saw you.”

  My voice was tangled up with my pounding heart, but I forced myself to speak, fearing this opportunity would be lost before any significant connection could be made. “Thank you, my lord. Oxford can get intolerably hot this time of the year, and we’ve found the climate here at Dartmoor’s End refreshing.” The horse on the ship let out a shrill whinny, and I glanced at the commotion it caused as the beast reared up from those trying to gentle it. “Unfortunately the sea doesn’t seem to have agreed with that one. Is she yours?”

  “Yes, and very special. You’re looking at my legacy. She’s from the Netherlands and carries the seed of the last living Friesian stallion within her. They’re a dying breed that I hope to save from extinction.” His voice deepened with a haunting emotion as he spoke, vibrating a chord within me so strongly that I almost missed that he’d said my legacy as opposed to a legacy. The nuance seemed significant to me, but his expression remained casual, revealing little. “I’m about to go on board to meet her.”

  “She’s so beautiful,” Cassie said.

  “She’s exquisite,” I murmured. I’d never seen a more beautiful horse, sleek and black with an impossibly long mane and tail. Tufts of glistening hair covered each of her hooves to give her a majestic appearance worthy of any legend. She appeared as if she were made of the greatest elements of earth imbued with the spirit of the heavens. It was also clear to me that Alexander was about to depart from our company. I motioned to the ship and boldly stepped past any rules of manners or propriety I’d been taught. “We’d love to go aboard to join you in welcoming her to her new home.”

  I barely bit back my groan as Cassie shook her head. “I don’t think I care to venture over the gangplank. But why don’t you go with the viscount, Andrie, then meet Gemini and me at the shops near the c
arriage.”

  Lord Alexander frowned. “The gangplank can be a bit unsteady with the wind as gusty as it is today.”

  “I’ve remarkable balance, and would love to meet your legacy, my lord.”

  “Enjoy yourself then,” Cassie said, with a smile and a wink, before she turned for the carriage where I could see Gemini in conversation with Lord Ashton and Mr. Drayson, mutual friends of Sean and Lord Alexander.

  Having little choice, Alexander offered me his arm, and I set my gloved hand on him. Once again, I could discern none of his emotions or feelings. His mind was like a gray mist where I could see nothing beyond dark shadows, no thoughts and no images, just strong nebulous emotions. Being next to him sent little jolts of fire through me though, wreaking havoc on all of my senses. It was no wonder my sight was rendered useless with him.

  He stiffly led the way to the ship, taking care that we didn’t step to close to the edge of the rocking gangplank, and my heart sank at his reserved manner. It was so different than before. When we first met this summer, I had felt such intense interest from him, so much so that were he a pirate I had no doubt he would have kidnapped me and taken me captive aboard his ship.

  “What’s her name? It must be something special, I should think.”

  “I don’t know her name yet,” he replied. “What would you name her, Miss Andrews?”

  I didn’t hesitate to answer. “A name is very important and must have a great history behind it. Which of the world’s legends or myths do you find heart in? The Druids, the Norse, the Greeks from ages past, or the more recent tales of King Arthur and his knights?”

  “Since I’m in the company of Andromeda, I’ll be the gentleman and say Greek since Andromeda was a Greek princess.”

  His choice secretly pleased me, despite his diplomatic reasoning. “Iris,” I said softly as the name for the dark horse came quickly to me. “The goddess of the rainbow, a symbol of the union of earth and sky, for the horse looks as if she could fly when she runs.”

  “Interesting.” We’d reached the top of the gangplank. He moved to the starboard deck first, then, surprisingly, reached for me, placing both hands at my sides to help lift me over the rail and cargo. I was aware of every sizzling inch of his fingers and palms pressed so firmly against my waist. Heat flashed through me as he set me on my feet, much closer to his person than I should be in public or private. “And according to some the mother of Eros as well.” He gazed directly into my eyes before releasing me. The heat burning there left no question that he was still attracted to me. I gasped at the connection and the sensations sliding through me as I realized his reserved manner was but an act. “Excellent choice, Miss Andrews. Iris it is, and I’ll hope to name the foal Eros.”

  The seductive tone of his voice went straight to my head with dizzying force. I wasn’t sure how I navigated my way across the deck.

  Suddenly, before we had quite reached her, the mare reared up again and broke free of her handlers, charging right at us.

  “Damn,” Alexander said as he scooped me up. In that moment, I saw into his mind as he jumped onto the bags of rice waiting on the deck. The image of a naked blonde woman, bound in his bed, flashed before my eyes. My breath caught then flew away with the vision as he deposited me out of harm’s way and grabbed one of the ropes trailing behind the mare. She instantly reared up, pawing the air, but he held on, tugging gently on the rope and whispering soothing words to the frightened animal. She pranced nervously in place before butting him with her head. When she appeared to be quieting, Alexander grasped her halter, continuing to gentle her with his voice. I had no idea what he whispered in her ear, but I did know one thing.

  The bound woman in his bed had been me.

  Chapter Two

  The image Alexander had of me in his mind dazed me. Surely it was his thought I’d seen and not mine, for though I’d had the pirate with his captive notion on the gangplank, I’d never imagined myself bound and naked before. I stared up at him, watching him calm the frightened mare with a velvet but iron hand, wondering what to make of the situation.

  I couldn’t go into an outrage, for I didn’t want him to know I had read his mind. Yet how could I ignore something so…so…outrageous? And why wasn’t I running from the ship screaming as if the devil were at my heels?

  Shutting my eyes, I recalled the image again, realizing that I had been smiling in it, as if welcoming the situation! Impossible. I popped my eyes open and slowly moved closer to his side. He’d calmed the mare adeptly. That the horse hadn’t suffered any injury I counted as much a testimony to the man’s persuasive skills as a miracle.

  My response to him was thankfully delayed by the arrival of several sailors who’d been in charge of the horse. They approached slowly, taking great care to keep from frightening the horse again. One ruddy sailor with legs as bowed as his girth had an awed look on his face; he clearly worshiped Alexander. The mare nuzzled Alexander as if he were sugar, or a sweet apple of temptation. She clearly welcomed her captor and his control. The whole incident had been mesmerizing to watch. His deep-toned voice was so soothing, his movements so slow, so patient, his touch so tender and caressing that one would have to be made out of stone to stand against him.

  Both the horse and I were made of flesh and blood, but unlike the horse, I’d found Alexander’s touch inflaming rather than calming. I had a difficult time reconciling the man before me with the naked image he’d had of me, so much so that I truly began to wonder if I had imagined it myself.

  “We’re right sorry, Captain Black,” one of the sailors muttered, poking his hat back onto the last tuft of hair growing atop his balding head. “She’s a tightly strung one for sure.”

  I glanced about, wondering to whom the man thought he was speaking. Alexander surprisingly answered.

  “You’d be high strung as well, Davey, if someone set you asea with a babe in your belly. But you’ll settle, won’t you girl?” Alexander said, running his palm down the mare’s neck. She snorted and flicked her tail, a mild protest that had very little bite behind it. “You can all go back to your docking duties. I’ll take charge of her. And tell Captain Jansen there’s to be an extra round of rum for you all tonight.”

  The men let out a rowdy cheer before dispersing on the deck.

  “Captain Black?” I blurted out the question with very little finesse the moment we were relatively alone. I think my mouth even hung open a bit, for the name sounded so…so…pirate like?

  “It’s my ship,” he said. “On occasion I take her for a sail. There’s nothing like the sea and the stars to fill a lonely n—horizon.”

  There’s nothing like the sea and the stars to fill a lonely night, was what he’d been about to say. I was sure of it.

  What about a lonely life? I found myself wondering, then shook off the thought. Considering the misery that many less fortunate than my family suffered, I’d no right to this morning’s grumblings. I straightened my shoulders and smoothed the skirt of my striped satin day dress only to feel my finger catch on the pocket. Glancing down, I found Aphrodite’s ring caught upon the material. The serpent’s emerald eyes winked up at me as I freed it, reminding me of exactly what my purpose was in seeking out Alexander today—Trojan Horse.

  He brought his horse a few steps closer to me. “Iris, meet Miss Andrews and thank her for your name.”

  “Hello, beauty.” I moved to the now docile horse, slipped off my lace glove, and brushed my fingertips along her soft mane. “Welcome to your new home. My name is Andromeda, but you and your master can call me Andrie.”

  “I’m not sure how wise that would be,” Alexander said.

  Looking up, I found he’d moved in closer, to the point that my skirts brushed his thigh and his heat touched my skin despite the cloth and the space separating us. A sharp tingle took that heat deeper inside me to places that made my cheeks burn. He was so close that were I to turn his way, my breasts would press…I shook my head.

  Whatever was wrong with me? My th
oughts kept running down wildly improper paths.

  “And why would that not be wise, my lord?” I shifted enough to meet his gaze, noting that the shadows lurking beneath the vibrant green depths of his eyes had grown darker than they’d been earlier this summer.

  His focus dropped to my lips for a long moment before he stepped away, taking my breath with him as he looked out over the sea.

  “Blackmoor! You devil! You didn’t say a word about buying a Friesian! Mrs. Killdaren just told us. The beauty must have cost you a king’s fortune.” Shouting up from the docks was Lord Ashton with Mr. Drayson, friends from the Killdaren brothers’ university days who spent their summers in Dartmoor’s End. Lord Ashton, pale of complexion with golden hair and lively blue eyes, embraced fashion in the same manner that Alexander thwarted it. Mr. Drayson, more subdued, had a strong jaw and serious features that were softened by his curly brown hair and warm brown eyes. Behind them came the entourage of my sisters, the Earl of Dartraven (a watered-down version of his son), and Sir Warwick, a gray-haired, gray-eyed gentleman with a barbed wit, who lived on a neighboring estate. He used a monocle and walked with a cane, but only for decoration. Unlike Sean, whose injury required a cane for balance and mobility.

  Alexander waved back. “Stay there. We’ll be down in a minute, and you’ll see just how much of a beauty she is.” Our time of relative privacy had ended, and the expression of relief on his face was far from flattering.

  He had no intention of explaining his remark, and my opportunity to speak to him about cataloguing artifacts had passed. Once we reached the docks, the hustling activity was too disruptive for Iris, and Alexander immediately suggested that everyone move to a quieter spot, just past the town, on the road to Killdaren’s Castle and Dragon’s Cove.