The impact of the image on me was like being punched in the stomach so hard that I couldn’t breathe.
Chapter Sixteen
How could Sir Warwick appear so outwardly calm and composed while such anger raged inside him? Clearly he did not wish to cause a scene. I marveled at his restraint; were I that angry I would be screaming or crying. The hidden thoughts in the minds of those around me, thoughts that only I knew were there, reached out and wrapped their hands around my throat, suffocating me.
Was I becoming mad as I had in my dream? Was I was losing sight of where I ended and another’s thoughts began? My heart raced and I grew dizzy.
“Forgive me, but I just remembered something very important that I must attend to.” I hurried from the room without looking at anyone. By the time I reached my room, I’d yet to escape Sir Warwick’s thoughts regarding low-class upstarts, nor the vision of his wife writhing upon the stage.
I went to my bed, climbed in and pulled the covers over my head, completely overwhelmed by the events of the day. Tears escaped from the corners of my eyes. How could I live like this? How could I face a future of reading other’s private thoughts and emotions?
How could I stop battling the enemy I faced now? A killer was lurking, and I had to find him. Then there was Alex, wasting his life away, and I had to save him. I would never be able to walk away from a wrong without trying to make it right. Maybe there was no escape for me ever. Maybe, like my namesake, I was chained upon a rock in this seething sea of human thoughts, and I would die here as the monster slowly devoured me. And deep down inside me, there was another realization dawning. Not all of my anguish today had come from my gift, but from finally facing how deep my feelings for Alex really were. All of my life I’d known I was different and had resigned myself to the fact that I’d never know marriage. But now that I’d discovered love, that empty future cut me to the core. My gift had never been more of a curse.
Cassie appeared at the door, saving me from the throes of my dilemma.
“Andrie? What’s wrong?” She came and sat on the bed. “Did Sir Warwick and the earl upset you? They’ll live without the gruesome cards, and we’ll all be better off.”
“I know. It’s not that.” I forced a wan smile as I peeked out from the covers. There was no point in telling Cassie what Sir Warwick thought about our presence in the Killdarens’ lives or how painful his wife’s death had been.
“Then what is it?”
“Life is changing. We’re all changing, and nothing will ever be the way it was before. Sometimes that overwhelms me.”
“I know. I feel that way too. Especially when I realize that I will soon have children to care for, and what their life and future is going to be like with the Dragon’s Curse over their heads.”
I tossed back the covers, realizing that I was only wasting time that I didn’t have to lose. “Though I haven’t read every page, I’ve searched through the Dragon’s Curse book. It’s in my armoire.”
“You’ve got Sean’s book in here? Good Lord, Andrie, Sean will be livid. He’s never let me take it out of the study.”
I winced. “Sorry. The night you collapsed Alex showed it to me, and I just brought it back here, hoping to find a way to break the curse. Too bad it’s not as simple as making the macabre cards disappear.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, without the awful stories to remind people of what happened, the instruments will now just be instruments of music and beauty, and perhaps will have a happy memories attached to them to erase the bad ones.”
“Andrie!” Cassie squealed and hugged me hard. “That’s it! I can’t change the past but I can change what is said about it today and how people see things that happen now. And just what would happen to the legend of the Dragon’s Curse if the book disappeared? Keep it hidden for now, and we’ll see what Sean does when he discovers it missing.”
I immediately saw that she thought to dissolve the Dragon’s Curse by the power of spreading positive rumors.
“Think about it,” she said. “Instead of everyone remembering that Alex nearly killed Sean in a fight eight years ago, why can it not be said that Alex saved Sean’s life after a terrible accident?”
“I can’t argue with that. Because that is exactly what Alex claims happened.”
“I’m sure as close as the earl said Sean and Alex were growing up, that I can get him to tell a few stories about that over dinner tonight after we tell some of our childhood tales. Cassie Andrews is declaring war on the Dragon’s Curse. I’m going to go fish a few stories out of Mr. and Mrs. Murphy in case the earl’s still upset about the music room.”
“Did they say more about it after I left? Sir Warwick was…”
“What?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t think he likes us very much.”
Cassie shook her head. “He doesn’t like anyone very much. Not even the earl.”
“Then why are they always together?”
“Unfortunately, I think they use each other to keep from being bored. With Sir Warwick around the earl doesn’t have to face the emptiness of his own life.”
“Alex won’t even let the earl inside Dragon’s Cove.”
“Good,” Cassie replied with a smile.
“Have you a fever? How can something like that be good?”
“Because if the earl has to stay here, he won’t be able to escape from seeing Prudence every day, and now that Prudence is changing how she sees her life, I think things are going to get very interesting. Did you see his face when she said she was thinking about starting a new life?”
“He did appear a bit upset by the idea.”
“I hope she does. Sometimes people don’t realize how much they really do love someone until they are gone.”
“Do you think the earl loves Prudence?”
“What matters is that she loves him. But, in an odd way, I think he does love her. Not like Sean loves me, mind you. Sean would have beaten the bedroom door down in eight days, and it’s been eight years.”
Cassie clamped her hand over her mouth. “I shouldn’t have said that,” she mumbled.
I laughed. “Yes, you should. And I understand.” My cheeks flushed hotly as images of Alex and me flashed through my mind. Alex would most likely obliterate the door in eight hours. No, make that eight seconds.
Cassie narrowed her eyes and peered closer at me, setting her hand on my forehead. “Andrie, is everything all right?”
“Certainly,” I said, shooing her to the door. “Go get your stories from Mrs. Murphy, and I’ll see you shortly for dinner. And it’s not just Cassie Andrews who’s declaring war on the Dragon’s Curse; we both are doing so.”
Besides putting the Killdaren family’s antiquities in order, the one thing I could do for Alex would be to free him from the bonds of the past. If there was a real curse, I wasn’t sure Cassie and I could ever find a way to break it, but we could do its reputation some serious damage. Enough to make Sean and Alex doubt that the curse ruled over them, and that was all that mattered right now. While I couldn’t remain in Alex’s life, I would see to it that he could truly live again.
I had the strangest feeling that if Sean and Alex’s mother had lived, what happened eight years ago to put them at odds with each other might not have occurred, and maybe having twins live their lives without giving in to the curse would break it. A mother would have done anything to save her sons, because love…
It suddenly occurred to me that the only way to end a curse born of scorn would be to cure it with love. But how?
At dinner Sean oozed tension and Cassie’s smile was over-bright, making me wonder if this whole situation between them would end in tragedy. Cassie was determined to prove to Sean that he was wrong, and Sean was determined to have Cassie do exactly what he wanted, regardless of what she thought or felt. They needed to compromise, but neither seemed willing to give an inch.
Besides Cassie, Sean, Gemini, Prudence and me, the Earl of Dartraven,
Sir Warwick, Lord Ashton and Mr. Drayson joined us for the meal. Thus far the conversation centered on the weather, news from Penzance and the continued success of Gilbert and Sullivan’s play, H.M.S. Pinafore.
“Have you the opportunity to see the play, gentlemen?” Cassie asked Lord Ashton and Mr. Drayson. “I was just telling Sean about it today, having found the premise of the story extremely interesting.”
“Actually, I did see it at the Opera Comique in London when it opened in May of last year,” said Mr. Drayson. With an intricately tied cravat and his brown hair, which was usually mussed, perfectly groomed, he seemed especially attentive to Gemini tonight. A situation I wasn’t sure Gemini welcomed, even though she didn’t seem as enamored with Lord Ashton as she’d been just a short time ago.
“Oh, I remember that night.” Lord Ashton shook his head sadly as his blue eyes glanced toward heaven. He was dressed in a cutaway jacket and an elaborate gold-embroidered waistcoat that made him as glittery as a cache of gold. “It was the one and only night in my life that I wished I’d been languishing away at a performance rather than playing cards. I lost a thousand pounds to that dastardly Handerland, and I’ve yet to win it all back.”
A thousand pounds. Heavens, I nearly fell from my chair. Lord Ashton had to be extremely well off to wager so much in just one night.
“The play was the most amusing bit I’d ever seen,” said Mr. Drayson. “And the women’s parts most decorous, considering the risqué situations portrayed in public these days. It’s scandalous.”
“It was very well done.” Cassie gave me the “eye”. “I thought the premise was extremely interesting,” she repeated.
My mind scrambled for what she wanted. “That a nurse accidentally switched two babies at birth, one low born and one high born?”
Cassie nodded. “Yes. That two men can grow up believing in something because that’s what they’ve been told all their lives, only to find out that what they believed wasn’t really true.”
“It was delightful,” said Gemini. “Here the captain’s daughter, who is supposed to marry an admiral, falls in love with a lowly sailor, but the lowly sailor turns out to be high born and the captain himself low born. The now high born sailor becomes the captain and marries the captain’s daughter, and the low born captain marries Buttercup, the nurse. Love supposedly levels all ranks.”
“Without question,” Sean said.
“Only for a time,” said Sir Warwick. “Love doesn’t last forever, and eventually class will show and divide by its very nature.”
Winter, I thought. Sir Warwick’s gray hair, gray eyes, black outlook and harsh and barren opinions made him like winter. Had he always been this way? Or had losing his wife so tragically made him so bitter? Just like the earl in some ways, grief must have changed him. When he was younger, I had to wonder if he’d been as dynamic as Alex and Sean. It didn’t seem possible.
“I think you’re wrong, Sir Warwick,” Prudence said, surprisingly entering into the fray. “I believe you should have said heart. Eventually the heart of a person will show, and by its nature it will bind or divide.”
“Very well said,” I added, refusing to believe in Sir Warwick’s cynicism. “Class doesn’t determine good or evil; heart does.”
“Class does divide though. There’s no question about it,” Lord Ashton said, his nose angling higher. I hadn’t realized before how disapproving he was of those less fortunate than himself. “And I fear we are going to see a nasty division right here in Dartmoor’s End soon. Drayson and I had to leave the inn and move to Dragon’s Cove this evening.”
“Did you receive another note demanding you make restitution for compromising someone?” Sean asked, leaning forward interestedly.
Mr. Drayson laughed. “Oddly enough the chap must have realized his mistake. We received two notes delivered to Dragon’s Cove just before we left to come here. The man apologized for his erroneous accusation and hoped he didn’t cause us any undue discomfort.”
Compromise? Make restitution? My cheeks began to burn as I realized that Lord Ashton and Mr. Drayson received their notes after I had gone to Alex asking for employment. Then, the very day Alex discovered he’d wrongly assumed the reasons for my need of a position, notes of apology were delivered to the gentlemen whose company I had enjoyed sporadically over the summer. I didn’t think the events were coincidental. I tried to focus on what Lord Ashton was saying, but the buzzing of my thoughts made my ears ring.
“The notes have left me more than curious,” he said. “I’ve instructed my attorney to keep investigating where they came from. As for why we left the village, I wanted to be able to sleep at night without worrying about being attacked. Ever since word about the symbols carved…well the connection between Lady Helen and Mary’s death, if you know what I mean, I’ve noted a growing unrest among those in the village. Today I heard one chap ask another if he thought there was witchcraft going on in the castles and if the men, meaning Drayson, me, you and Alex, weren’t warlocks or vampires.”
“Surely nobody really gives credence to those idiotic rumors,” Sean said.
Cassie coughed. “I, uh, don’t think you should dismiss this as total nonsense, Sean. Your nocturnal lifestyle has foddered these people’s superstitions for years, and you don’t do anything to dispel their notions. You know that no mob is rational. Prudence told me what almost happened to her. If you and Stuart hadn’t shown up when you did—”
“What almost happened?” the earl demanded, looking from Sean to Prudence.
“Nothing,” Prudence said. “I’ve finished the embroidered chessboard for Rebecca—”
“No, don’t change the subject,” said Sean. “He should know, and I’ve kept my promise of silence too long. What happened is that the villagers almost stoned Prudence when they learned she was with child.”
“No,” Prudence cried. “He didn’t have to know.” Pressing her hand to her mouth to keep back her cries, she ran from the room.
The earl turned pasty white. “When? Where was I? Why wasn’t I told?”
“You and Warwick had gone to London,’ Sean said. “Prudence left, having decided she’d rather not live here considering the circumstances. When Stuart and I arrived, the villagers had already caused her bodily harm, and that may be why Rebecca is blind. You weren’t told because Prudence doesn’t want your pity. I don’t think she realized the alternative was having eight years of your indifference. That is all I am going to say on the subject. You will have to get the rest of the story out of her. I apologize to everyone for the serious lapse in our dinner etiquette, but sometimes it is more important that what needs to be said gets said.”
“I agree with my husband,” said Cassie. “So he won’t mind me bringing up the subject of his relationship with Alex.”
Sean’s jaw dropped. Sir Warwick laughed. Lord Ashton choked on his wine. Mr. Drayson dropped his fork into his plate and Gemini giggled. I bit my lip, wondering if Sean would explode or if he would toss Cassie over his shoulder and cart her from the dining room.
“Now history would have us look at their relationship and conclude they were doomed to repeat the past.”
“Cassie,” Sean said sharply.
She ignored him. “In speaking to Mr. Murphy just before dinner an interesting fact came to light. Apparently, when they were just seven years old, they escaped their governess, and took a boat out in the sea—”
“Cassie!” Sean stood up.
“Do you know what happened? A huge wave came up and flipped the boat.”
“That’s it!” Sean thundered. He pulled back Cassie’s chair and scooped her up, then marched with his hitched gait for the door.
“Alex hit his head and was knocked unconscious,” Cassie shouted. “And Sean—”
Whatever she was going to say was silenced by Sean kissing her. Since she wrapped her arms around his neck just as they disappeared through the doorway, she didn’t appear to be in distress.
“I could use a drink,” said
the earl, still looking stunned.
“I’ll join you,” replied Sir Warwick.
Gemini settled her gaze on Lord Ashton. “Shall we play cards in the drawing room? I’ll wager I can win.”
What was my innocent little sister going to wager, I wondered as she retrieved a cloak to keep her warm. The outcome of my little bet with Alex had had some earth-shattering results. Not that I regretted them, but Gemini was a great deal younger than me and nothing marred her prospects of having a wonderful marriage. I shut my eyes, hoping I’d fallen asleep in my bed, and this entire evening was nothing more than my imagination. The world had gone completely mad.
I discovered the situation wasn’t as bad as I imagined. Gemini was not betting funds we couldn’t afford to lose, but frivolous things like the marzipan Mrs. Murphy had made for dessert. It was perfectly harmless. Besides, Gemini was showing herself to be quite an adept card player. During the start of their gaming, I’d gone upstairs to check on Prudence but didn’t get to see her. Bridget said that she’d given Prudence calming tea and that she had already fallen asleep. Two hours after starting their play, the men left for Dragon’s Cove looking rather dazed. Gemini had won every hand.
“Where did you learn to play cards so expertly?” I asked as we left the drawing room for our quarters.
Gemini pulled her cloak closer. “I’ve only played once before. Remember the night that Lord Alexander had the dinner party at the Seafarer’s Inn? We learned how then.”
“Either you are a genius at cards or Lord Ashton and Mr. Drayson need to sharpen their skills a bit. Let’s hope Lord Ashton doesn’t wager more than he can afford to lose. Can you imagine betting a thousand pounds? It makes me shudder to even think of it.”
“I didn’t know people bet money like that playing cards. Why, a woman could win an entire fortune in a single night if she were lucky.”
Something in Gemini’s voice sent warning signals through me. “What are you thinking?” I said, reaching for her hand.
She skittered back, laughing happily. “Nothing of note. I’ll see you in the morning. Tomorrow is going to be even more interesting than today.”
Darkest Dreams Page 20