He stopped. "If you had killed Badru, the troops would already be on their way. Any other Daliph would've met with K'var the day he arrived and sent him away by the next morning leading five hundred men ready to kill every member of the tribes if they had to. No, Badru is your only hope."
"But you just said that he has no choice in this."
Sayel chewed on his lip. "I don't think he does. But if there's any way to avoid this action, Badru will find it. As you said, he loves you. But you must trust him, my dorana. You must."
She nodded, but she wasn't sure she agreed.
Chapter 89
Badru came to see her in the middle of the night, clearly exhausted, his shoulders slumped, dark circles under his eyes. She was just as tired. She'd worked herself into a frenzy wondering what she'd do if he couldn't save her people, practicing the hundred and five attacks until she could barely move.
"What did you decide?" she demanded as he pulled her close, burying his face against her neck.
He shook his head. "Can't we just forget that for now? Forget I'm the Daliph. Forget you're from the tribes. Can't we just be the man and woman I see in my dreams at night, dancing on the desert sands?"
He kissed her before she could answer and she lost herself in the sensation of his mouth against hers, the feel of his hands as they moved along the curves of her body. She ran her hand along the line at the base of his spine, shivering at the intensity of his touch.
But when he moved his kisses to her neck, she shoved him away, once more remembering who she was and what was at stake.
"I can't do this, Badru."
He stared at her, confused, angry.
"I need to know what you've decided."
He rubbed his face and turned away from her.
"Badru?"
"We need the trade, K'lrsa."
She came around in front of him, demanding that he look at her, but he turned away again. "What are you saying?"
He shook his head. "We can't go back. We can't…We need the trade."
It felt as if he'd ripped the heart from her chest. "You're going to do it? You'll let him slaughter everyone I know and love?"
He finally met her eyes. "I have no choice, K'lrsa."
"You always have a choice, Badru. You're just not willing to pay the price to do what's right."
"What's right? For whom? Your tribe or my people? Life isn't simple, K'lrsa. It isn't all right choices and wrong choices."
She clutched her arms against her chest, wondering how she could've been foolish enough to love him. "It is to me. You can deny K'var and save my family and friends. Or you can help him slaughter every single person that matters to me. Pretty simple choice. But I guess you'd rather have your silks and salt than protect the lives of my people. Do you honestly think that all of this is worth more than a single life?"
He clenched his fists. "Do you know what will happen if I deny K'var? They'll kill me. And you. And Herin. And Sayel. And anyone else they can think of.
"Because if the Black Horse Tribe stops trading with us, we're done. It's the end. We go back to begging for scraps from the other Daliphana. Without that trade route, we're nothing."
She stared at him for a long time, wishing he'd change his mind, but she knew he wouldn't no matter how much she cried or pleaded with him to do so. And she'd be damned if she was going to weep and wail at his feet.
She turned away. "Fine. Then let me leave. Tonight. Let me ride Fallion back home as fast as I can and warn my people. Give them a chance to defend themselves."
"You said you'd give me three days."
He tried to pull her close, but she jerked away from him. "That was before I knew you were a murderer."
"I'm not…" He shook his head, his face twisted with grief. "I love you, K'lrsa. I thought what we shared meant something, but I guess those dreams were more real to me than they were to you."
His words were like a dagger in her gut. "I could say the same of you, Badru."
He left, slamming the door behind him.
She collapsed to the floor and curled into a ball, angry as much as she was sad. She had to leave. She had to warn her people.
But how?
Chapter 90
When Sayel came for her the next morning, she shook her head and crossed her arms. "No. I'm not playing these games anymore. Badru freed me, he gave me Fallion back. I want to go home. Now."
Sayel glanced at Morlen, but Morlen just shrugged. Sayel walked towards her, hands held out to calm her like she was a skittish colt that had never been ridden. "My dorana…"
"Don't my dorana me."
When Sayel flinched, she relented, uncrossing her arms and taking his hands in hers. "Sayel, I need to help my people. I need to warn them."
He chewed on his lip, not quite meeting her eye.
"What?"
Sayel opened and closed his mouth with a small sigh. "My dorana. Think. If Badru does this, if he helps them, then he does so expecting to triumph. He can't let you warn your people. It will cost him troops and, if your tribe wins, trade."
She shook her head, denying his words even though they rang true.
A knock at the door pulled her attention away from Sayel; a young slave girl entered the room, a pile of soft baru hide in her arms, so creamy and rich it must've been worked by a master tanner.
The girl held the clothes away from her body, eyes focused on the ground. K'lrsa shook as she watched her.
This is what the Daliphate was. This is what it did to people—enslaved them, beat them down. This young girl should be running, laughing loudly as she chased her friends. Instead, she cowered in the doorway, ready to run away at the slightest harsh word.
This is what Badru wanted to protect.
She turned away, bile burning the back of her throat.
This is what the man she loved thought mattered more than the lives of her sister and her mother and her brother.
"What is this?" Sayel demanded.
The girl whispered, "From the Daliph, honored poradom."
When K'lrsa turned back, the girl was gone and Sayel and Morlen were inspecting the clothes. "What are these?" Sayel asked.
K'lrsa took the pants and admired the fine stitching along the inside of each leg. She ran her hand over the smooth baru hide. They were finer than anything she'd ever owned. This, at last, was a true Rider's outfit.
Did Badru really want her to wear it? Or was this some trick played by his enemies?
K'lrsa stripped off her robe and put on the pants and vest, running her hands along her thighs, lost in memories of riding Fallion, her hair streaming behind her in the breeze, and the pure joy of freedom.
"My dorana…I…"
She ignored him as she stepped to the mirror and braided her hair into a single, simple plait down her back.
Before her stood a Rider, not a life-sized doll or some man's lustful fantasy of a Rider or even some seamstress's idea of a Desert Princess.
It was just her. K'lrsa dan V'na of the White Horse Tribe. Rider. Hunter. Protector.
This was who she was.
She smiled, finally comfortable with what she saw.
The woman who smiled back at her was different from the girl who'd arrived in the palace. That girl hadn't known who she was or what she really wanted. She was beautiful, but generic, a piece of clay to be molded by whosoever cared to do so.
But this woman, this woman knew herself. She knew what she wanted and what mattered to her. She was willing to sacrifice her dream of personal happiness to help those she loved. She was strong enough to stand up for what was right.
This woman had a fire inside that had nothing to do with anyone's perceptions of her. She knew that they could call her whatever they wanted and dress her in whatever they wanted, but she'd always be true to herself.
She wasn't trying to prove herself to her mother or please a man—not even the man of her dreams. She was herself, flawed but powerful, weak but strong enough to succeed.
There
was another knock at the door. It opened as she turned around.
Badru stood there, resplendent in his court attire, the blue of his vest matching the blue of his eyes.
She longed to touch him, kiss him, lose herself in him.
But she couldn't.
She met his gaze, her chin held high, not caring what the four guards behind him thought.
She wasn't some possession to be ordered about. Not anymore.
He stepped into the room, smiling. "I'm glad to see they fit. I had them made especially for you. The seamstresses worked all night."
She forced herself not to match his smile. "So you're going to let me go."
He nodded.
When the smile broke across her face, he held up his hand. "On one condition."
K'lrsa closed her eyes. She was tired of conditions and constraints. She just wanted to be free, to go home.
"K'lrsa…Please?"
She looked at him again, sighing deeply. "What condition?"
"You spend one more day by my side." He held his hand out to her, clearly expecting her to take it.
She didn't. "Why?"
He met her eyes, secretly begging her, but she wasn't going to do that again. She wasn't going to let his pretty blue eyes and sweet smiles turn her aside.
"I want you there when I speak to K'var again."
She crossed her arms. "Are you going to deny him?"
He glanced at the guards and Sayel and Morlen. "I don't know yet. But if you're going back to your people, don't you want to be able to tell them as much as you can about the threat they face?"
The threat they faced. Him. He was the threat.
She should kill him, but she knew she wouldn't. She loved him.
She wanted to refuse—she didn't want to spend another moment of her life surrounded by men who hated her just for who she was—but then she'd just be locked in this room for who knows how long, wondering what was happening.
"Fine. I'll come with you." She took his hand.
Chapter 91
As they walked down the halls to the audience chamber, everyone stopped what they were doing and stared, whispering to one another in hushed tones after they'd passed.
K'lrsa walked side-by-side with Badru—his equal. He ignored everyone; so did she. This was how it should've been all along, not her dressed and bound, escorted like a prisoner to sit one step below him. But her, there, walking next to him, her hand in his.
When they reached the audience chamber and the giant double doors opened, the room fell silent as always. But there was a note to the silence, a hidden vibration that threatened to shatter the windows and break the walls. It was the sound of hundreds of men who wanted to speak, but didn't dare breathe.
Badru placed K'lrsa's hand on his arm—her fingers clearly free of the meza—and led her to the top of the dais where she sat on the couch while he stood before everyone, turning slowly so they could all see him.
"I, Badru Palero, Daliph of the Toreem Daliphate, call on all of you to witness that this woman, K'lrsa dan V'na of the White Horse Tribe, who was brought to me as a slave and who I chose as my dorana, is a slave no more. Nor is she my dorana."
The sound in the room exploded, so powerful it shook loose a small tile from the ceiling that shattered into dust as it hit the floor at Badru's feet.
Badru held up a hand and the room settled once more into silence, but it was a restive thing, like a horse ready to spook. "K'lrsa dan V'na comes to us as a Rider, hunter and protector of her tribe. She is under my protection while here or in any part of the Toreem Daliphate. Any who harm her while she is under my protection will die."
A whisper of rage passed around the room and was gone.
Badru turned to Nesbit as if he hadn't just made an earth-shattering announcement. "Nesbit. Call forth the supplicant."
"Yes, most honored leader." Nesbit cleared his throat while Badru seated himself. "I call forth K'var of the Black Horse Tribe."
K'var walked forward from the back of the room, his expression stony, his eyes darting back and forth between Badru and K'lrsa. K'lrsa met his gaze and he flinched. She smiled.
She noted that he wasn't wearing the multi-colored cloth of the Daliph's favor today, but didn't dare ask what that meant.
"K'var."
K'var bowed, tilting his head just enough that the gesture was almost mocking. "Your Excellency."
"Before I tell you my decision, I'd like to ask you a few more questions."
K'var almost laughed, but stopped himself with just a slight snort. He glanced around the room as if looking for the men to witness the weakness of their Daliph.
K'lrsa tilted her head to the side as she imagined what it would feel like to poke his eyes out with Cutting Cat. He flinched away from her, focusing his attention on Badru instead.
"Of course, Your Excellency. What would you like to know?"
Badru leaned back, appearing to lounge in his chair, but he sat with the deadly calm of a desert cat ready to attack. "You mentioned yesterday small skirmishes with the other tribes."
"I did."
"Who started these conflicts?"
"Your Excellency?"
"Who attacked first, K'var?"
K'var shrugged. "It's hard to tell, Your Excellency."
Badru leaned forward, all lithe grace and danger. "I don't think so, K'var. See, I've been researching a certain skirmish for some time now."
K'var straightened up, his eyes darting towards K'lrsa.
"Before K'lrsa came to us, her tribe was attacked." Badru stood and paced, looking at the men in the room as he continued. "She, and others, believed that the attack was by my men. At my order."
K'var watched Badru closely, but he didn't speak. Badru continued to address the room, ignoring K'var. "It seems the men who attacked and killed her father wore my colors. And carried swords.
"But I didn't order my men to attack the tribes."
He turned to K'var at last, glaring down at him, his face a mask of controlled fury. "As a matter of fact, K'var, I discovered just last night that you led that attack."
K'lrsa clenched her hands into fists, her fingernails digging into the palms of her hands in half-moons of agony.
She struggled to breathe. That meant K'var was the one responsible for her father's death. Her father's killer was just ten steps away from her.
"What say you, K'var?"
K'var shrugged and addressed his answer to the crowd. "I told you, the other tribes are jealous. They want what we have. Most are harmless. They want but they don't act. But one man—B'nin of the White Horse Tribe—spoke against us. He wanted us expelled. He would have taken everything from us. So we killed him."
Sayel grabbed K'lrsa to keep her from running down the steps and attacking K'var right then and there. Badru continued to watch K'var, not looking back at her. "How?"
K'var glared past Badru and met K'lrsa's eyes with a slight sneer. "He was an arrogant, trusting fool. We had an ally in the tribe. He led him into an ambush and we killed him."
An ally?
"What became of this ally?"
K'var glared at K'lrsa once more. "He had a change of heart. He tried to save the man. So we killed him, too."
L'ral? L'ral had betrayed her father? She gasped, the pain in her chest squeezing all the air out of her lungs.
"So you killed this man, your enemy, and you made it look like my men were responsible. That should've ended it."
K'var sneered. "The man's son has rallied the tribes against us."
Badru nodded. "I see. So you need my help because you failed to control your enemy and then botched killing him and, as a result, turned all of the tribes against you?"
K'var glared up at him, but didn't respond.
Badru paced back and forth, every eye in the room on him. "It's true that we need the trade across the desert. But I'm not so sure that we need you, K'var."
Badru glanced back at K'lrsa.
She stiffened.
No. She wou
ld not lead men from the Daliphate across the desert. She would not participate in the ruin of everything she knew and loved.
But it didn't matter whether she would or not, it just mattered what people thought. Isn't that what Herin had told her before?
An excited murmur ran through the crowd as men whispered to their neighbors.
K'var shook his head. "No. You need us. You have no choice. No other tribes will agree to what we have."
Badru smiled. "Oh, there's always a choice, K'var. A very wise woman told me that just yesterday." He glanced back at K'lrsa once more and she felt a rush of affection for him. "Tell me something else, K'var. Did you approach any of the other Daliphana for assistance?"
K'var shifted his weight back and forth as a surge of anger ran through the room.
"Answer me."
K'var held his chin high and glared at Badru. "Yes, Your Excellency. I did."
He met Badru's eyes, defiant, but with glimmers of fear flashing in his eyes.
"What did you offer them in exchange for their help?"
K'var's lips twitched. "We don't have an exclusive agreement to trade with you."
"No?" Badru let that question hang in the air before he continued. "That isn't what I asked you. What did you offer them?"
K'var shifted his weight again, glancing towards the back of the room. "We had to protect ourselves. We couldn't leave the fate of the tribe to…"
"To me? To an untried, young Daliph? A weak man? One who might act based on love or conscience instead of greed?" Badru's lips quirked upward into a half-smile.
K'lrsa glanced around the room—too many men were agreeing with that assessment. Not in obvious ways, but in slight glances at their neighbors or the slightest nodding of a head here or there.
Badru should stop. He didn't realize how thin the earth under his feet really was. One misstep and K'var would win this confrontation.
Badru stepped down one level. "What did you promise the other Daliphana, K'var?" His voice hardened as he continued. "Better yet, what did you promise my enemies here in the Toreem Daliphate?"
Rider's Revenge (The Rider's Revenge Trilogy Book 1) Page 31