Heart of a Vampire, Book Bundle (Books 1-3)

by Amber Kallyn

  He wanted her love again.

  He froze, holding himself perfectly still as the truth of his thoughts washed through him.

  Her love.

  To be part of her life, and their son’s.

  They could be a family. Something he’d not dreamed of having since before the attack on their clan. And still, this woman was the only one he could picture himself loving.

  Now, they could have eternity together.

  If she’d accept him, after being such an ass.

  He sat back on the couch, glancing at the flickering flames. “Ashlyn?” he said softly, hesitant.

  She stayed turned from him. “Why are you even in my room?”

  He swallowed the pain in his throat. “I wanted to talk to you.”

  “We’ve done that. Now, you should leave. I’m... I’m tired.”

  “And if I don’t want to leave yet?”

  She slowly faced him, meeting his gaze. “Why not?”

  He took a deep breath and said simply, “I’ve missed you.”

  Her eyes widened and she blinked. “You’ve been a jerk since you got here.”

  Shrugging, he replied, “I know.”

  “Why?”

  “I’m an idiot?”

  Her lips twitched.

  “Maybe you’ll give me a chance to show you I’m not a complete ass?”

  “Perhaps.”

  He nodded, then leaned over and took her hand from her lap. He pressed a light, lingering kiss on the back, then glanced up and winked.

  “Get some sleep. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

  “Perhaps,” she repeated, but her eyes shone with amusement.

  And something else which gave him great pleasure.

  Softness. Toward him.

  * * *

  The next evening, as the sun sank behind the horizon, Ashlyn stepped outside, into the fragrant garden. She’d slept the day away, her dreams a mix of nightmares of the past and desires for the man who was turning her inside out.

  She wasn’t quite sure what Connor wanted from her. She didn’t know what she wanted from him.

  Sean sat at the fountain, leaning back on a bench and staring up into the sky.

  Ashlyn approached, then froze when Connor strode into the clearing and took a seat on the bench next to her son.

  She tensed.

  Connor scuffed his foot over the ground, rubbing his knuckles together, while Sean continued to ignore him.

  “So,” Connor mumbled.

  Sean slowly sat up, but still didn’t look at Connor. “Yeah?”

  Connor’s lips tightened. “Tell me about Laroche.”

  “Why?”

  “So I can help you and your mother.”

  “Why?”

  Connor shot him a glare. “Why do you think?”

  “Don’t know. It’s why I asked.”

  “Because I’m a Judge and it’s my damn job.”

  “Ah.”

  Connor bristled impatiently.

  Ashlyn inwardly laughed.

  “Look, kid. I can help the two of you be free from him for good.”

  Sean finally looked at Connor. “What do you care?”

  Connor shrugged, rubbing his knuckles together harder, faster. “I just do.”

  “Even though I’m a freak you’re supposed to kill?”

  Ashlyn cringed at the word, ready to step forward and defend her son, to himself and to Connor.

  But the man surprised her. “Freak? Aye, I suppose some would think so.”

  Sean’s eyes widened.

  “Some think I’m an asshole.”

  “Really?” Sean drawled sarcastically.

  “Really. But who cares what other people think.”

  Something inside Ashlyn melted at Connor’s words to her son.

  She didn’t understand the change in him—could he really look past the fact Sean was half demon, just because it had been his sperm? Biology was a strange thing, but this seemed too much to accept.

  And if it wasn’t for that reason, why?

  Connor continued, “So, will you let me help you or not?”

  “I don’t know,” Sean replied slowly.

  “You could at least accept it for your mom’s safety.”

  Sean’s eyes blazed, green flashing red. “My mom’s safety? That’s a laugh. Who do you think has been protecting her? Not you.”

  Connor nodded. “Aye, lad. It should have been my duty, and I failed. A regret which will sting my heart forever.”

  Ashlyn blinked a few times. When had Connor become so poetic?

  The door to the castle swung open and the sheriff came outside, the dark haired vampire, Niki, right behind him.

  They spotted her hunched behind a rose bush like some peeping tom, and Niki smirked.

  Ashlyn rose as the sheriff strode toward her.

  His voice was smooth, if impatient. “I need to speak with you.”

  With a longing glance toward her son and his father talking for the first time, she turned and followed the sheriff into the castle. He led her to Jordan’s receiving chamber, where her cousin and Dalia already waited.

  Ashlyn didn’t like being led about with no explanation. She settled stiffly in one of the chairs.

  Jordan nodded to the sheriff. “Shane has some news.”

  “My sister came to me, worried.” His eyes darkened as he stared at Ashlyn. “Our town has been plagued with problems between the vampires and shifters for months now.”

  His magic finally clicked. “You’re a Peace Keeper here,” she said in admiration.

  “I am,” he replied. “And I’ve been doing my damn best to keep that peace. It hasn’t been easy, with some rogue vampires coming in and kidnapping both Arcaine, killing them off as well. The tension is high.”

  “What does this have to do with me?” she asked.

  “Your demon is starting things back up,” Niki stated.

  Ashlyn glanced at the woman, tensing at the deep anger in her red-circled eyes. They blamed her, and rightly so. She’d led Laroche here.

  “We couldn’t find him last night,” Dalia said softly, her voice sympathetic. “And Amy, the demon we captured, has some sort of block on her I can’t quite get past. I will, with time.”

  “But we don’t have time,” Shane stated. “The wolves are clamoring for justice, and the townspeople are in danger. It’s my duty to protect everyone. This demon could easily push things over the edge.”

  “If it comes to war, we’ll be ready,” Jordan growled.

  Shane sighed. “The last thing I want is war, you idiot.”

  “Aye, I know. But my clan won’t lay down for the wolves, either.”

  “They know you’re harboring the vampire the demon wants,” Niki replied. “They want her gone.”

  Jordan sprung to his feet. “They have no right—”

  “No, they don’t.” Shane drew his arms behind his back, standing straight and tall. “I had four disappearances reported during the last twenty-four hours, one shifter, three humans. This can’t go on.”

  Ashlyn took a shaky breath. “I can leave. Laroche will follow me.” And perhaps Sean could stay here. He’d be safe, while she dealt with Laroche.

  Her heart thumped, heavy and sore, at the thought of facing the demon on her own.

  “You’re not going anywhere.” Dalia rose and crossed the room to perch on the side of Ashlyn’s chair. The woman took her hand, squeezing it tightly.

  Surprised, Ashlyn met her gaze. Her eyes were mesmerizing, just like the first time she’d looked into them. The room spun, and a warmth encased her, as she was taken into a different, worry-free place.

  Dalia glanced away. “Sorry,” she said.

  “So what are we going to do about this demon?” Shane demanded. “Whatever it is, needs to be quick.”

  The door opened and Connor strode in, his eyes narrow. Disgruntled, he said archly, “Shouldn’t I have been included in this meeting?”

  Jordan raised a brow. “You were otherwise occ
upied.”

  Connor glanced around the room, taking everything in, his gaze lingering on Ashlyn so long she fought the urge not to fidget.

  “Why not use me as bait?” she said.

  “No way,” Connor stated flatly.

  At the same time, Shane stared at her, scratching his chin. “It could work.”

  “We’re not putting her in danger,” Connor replied.

  “Nay.” Jordan stared at her too.

  She stiffened, beginning to feel as if she were on display.

  Dalia’s grip on her hand tightened. “We have Amy. If we let the girl go, wouldn’t she lead us straight to this Laroche?”

  “Possibly,” Shane replied. “But demons are sneaky. We could lose her, and be left with nothing.”

  Ashlyn nodded. “Let her go, and I’ll follow. Alone. Between the lure of us both, Laroche should be enticed out of hiding.”

  Connor leaned against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest stiffly, and glaring at them all.

  Jordan sat back down, still watching her closely. “I have enough people to ferret away within the city as well as the outskirts. We could watch you at all times.”

  “If there are too many vampires, Laroche will know something’s up,” Ashlyn replied.

  Shane stepped forward. “I have people as well, non-Arcaine.”

  “I’ll be the one watching Ashlyn.” Connor continued to glare at everyone in the room.

  She flinched at the fury in his voice.

  * * *

  Connor couldn’t believe what he was hearing. They all wanted to sit back and let Ashlyn be bait? He didn’t know if he could stand it.

  But by the stubborn look in her green eyes, he knew any argument would be useless. Following her, making sure she stayed safe, was the least he could do. Inwardly, he cursed a blue streak, while he stared at the traitorous sheriff, and even his own kin.

  Jordan glanced at him, and nodded. “Fine. You’ll be right behind her.”

  “And if I want someone else?” Ashlyn asked, her cheeks bright pink with anger.

  “I’m the best, darling,” Connor replied.

  She stiffened. “I can keep myself safe, thank you very much.”

  Ignoring her, he replied, “So when do we want to do this?”

  “Tomorrow night. Most of us here will be at our strongest once the sun goes down. So will Laroche, but we’ll have to deal with that,” Jordan said.

  Shane replied, “I don’t like waiting that long, but you’re right. We need time to plan and the sun will soon be up.”

  “Fine.” Connor watched Ashlyn, running through scenarios, trying to figure out a way to change her mind.

  Shane’s radio crackled and a voice said, “Sheriff?”

  He left the room to answer it, though he had to know full well they could all hear him in the hall. Someone had broken into the bank. A minute later he was back. “I have to go.”

  Niki strode to his side. “I’ll help make the plans, and fill you in when I get home.”

  The sheriff nodded, kissing her cheek before striding out, his shoulders tense.

  “So let’s get to it,” Niki said.

  Jordan crossed to the large table with the map of the city, and began strategizing.

  An hour later, Connor followed Ashlyn up the stairs. She was still ignoring him, but he could deal with it.

  On the third floor, she passed her room and knocked on Sean’s door. No one answered. She peaked in, and from his vantage point, he caught the softening of her eyes, the curling up of her lips.

  Motherhood looked damn fine on her.

  She softly closed the door and turned back to her own room. “What are you doing, following me everywhere?”

  He nodded.

  Shaking her head, she went into her room, trying to close the door on him. He slapped his palm against the wood.

  “We need to talk.”

  “There’s nothing to talk about,” she replied in a hoarse whisper.

  “I think there is. Will you sit in the garden with me for a bit?”

  She blinked. “The sun’s almost up.”

  “Aye.”

  With an exaggerated sigh, she headed back downstairs. He followed, grabbing some food from the kitchen along with a couple bags of blood, before meeting her in the open area near the fountain.

  He handed her one of the bags, then reclined on a bench, watching her pace.

  She moved, jerky, stiff, as if in the most uncomfortable place in the world. He tried to hide a grin at knowing he affected her, at least in some way. Not exactly how he wanted, but he’d take what he could get. For now.

  “Are you sure you want to put yourself out there like this?” he finally asked.

  She spun, glaring at him. “You’re not going to stop me.”

  “I wasn’t trying to.” He had no remorse over the lie.

  Lifting the blood to her lips, she took a healthy drink, continuing to pace. “Look, I’m tired. We have a big night ahead. What do you want from me?”

  His emotions rose, nearly choking him at her question. Oh, he could answer in so many ways. Most of which would send her running away as fast as she could.

  “To talk.”

  She arched a brow. “You certainly seem to want that a lot lately. You’re forgetting we have nothing to talk about.”

  “Do you remember when we were younger?”

  She jerked, shoulders stiffening further. “Aye.”

  “Do you miss those times?”

  “Aye. But the past can’t come back.”

  “I suppose not. What would have happened, do you think, if they’d never attacked our clan?”

  She drifted to the bench and sat on the far end. “I would have born you at least a few sons before dying in childbirth,” was her tart reply.

  It hit him that her words were probably true. The mortality rate in the eleventh century hadn’t been exactly hopeful. Yet, he’d never really thought about it before.

  It scared him on levels so deep he refused to name the feeling, for fear of freezing up and perhaps letting her down again.

  Instead, trying to keep the conversation light, he said, “And strapping fine lads they would have been.”

  “Like Sean.” She stared at him, as if daring him to argue.

  He replied softly, “Aye. Like Sean.”

  She jumped to her feet, rubbing her temple. “You damn man. You’re so confusing.”

  He followed her, taking her hand and forcing her to still. “Why?”

  “I ask again, what do you want from me?”

  Taking a deep breath, he replied, “I don’t know. All I can think about is you. What we used to have. I dream of you. Of loving you. Planning for our future together. Every fucking night. Do you know what torture it is, to wake every damn time, remembering your scent, your touch—your body and your kiss?”

  She inhaled shakily, trying to tug her hand away.

  He gripped it tighter. “Seeing you, being around you, is killing me. I want to drag you to the ground and make love. I want my dreams to be real.”

  “I-I...” She swallowed, her gaze darting everywhere but his face.

  “So, I don’t know what the hell I want from you. All I know is if I lose you again, it will suck the soul out of me.”

  She finally met his gaze. Her eyes were light, shining with wetness, from an emotion he couldn’t read.

  “What do you want me to say? We can’t go back and make everything the way it was before.”

  He growled, “You think I don’t know that?” His heart beat in a rush, sending blood hotly through his veins.

  Taking a shaky breath, she said, “So, what do we do?”

  He let her hand go, though it was one of the hardest things he’d ever done in his long life. Then, drawing closer, so slowly she had the chance to run if she wanted, he kissed her lips softly. Pulling back, he was pleased at her flushed cheeks, and quickened breathing. “We find Laroche and deal with him. Permanently.”

  She nodded mut
ely.

  “Just promise me, when that’s done, you won’t go running off before we can figure some of this out.”

  Her eyes darkened and she twisted her hands in front of her. “I... I can’t do that.”

  She turned and headed back for the castle, leaving him with a gaping hole in his chest.

  Chapter Twelve

  Ashlyn curled up on her bed, hugging a pillow, trying to stop the slow tears dripping down her cheeks. What was Connor doing to her?

  She hadn’t thought of love, or longing, for so long. But ever since he’d shown up, it was constantly on her mind.

  For him to say, now, he wanted to explore a future?

  And yet, she couldn’t. Knowing the guilt he felt at her and Sean being imprisoned was more than she could bear. If she told him all the rest, it would kill some part of him. And it would disgust him.

  He’d been her first lover. He’d expected to be, back then. And oh, how they’d loved. Both of them had been bold, insatiable with the bloom of youth.

  But hundreds of years imprisoned in a demon’s torture chamber had changed all that. Not that she remember much, Laroche had always given her some sort of mind-numbing drug beforehand.

  Demons still talked.

  She’d heard second-hand how, with the help of a few drugs, she’d become a wild woman, the belle of the party as one demon put it. The stories of orgies they’d told... she shuddered, remembering those tales.

  And she thanked God, yet again, that Laroche had drugged her. She didn’t know if she could stand remembering it all. And if she couldn’t face it, neither would the man who claimed he still loved her.

  Inside, a cold ball of ice formed, drowning out the oppressing pain. She had to harden herself. Stop thinking about him. Stop caring.

  Otherwise, the pain would be unbearable when she left.

  And leave she must. Just as soon as Laroche was taken care of, she and Sean would leave for the last time. Find their own place to call home.

  And never look back.

  She sniffled, punching her pillow. Control the emotions, block them out.

  But the tears didn’t listen, just continued to fall.

  A hand fell on her shoulder and she nearly screamed as she jerked around. Connor crouched by the side of the bed, his eyes full of the same agony she felt.

  “Honey,” he whispered hoarsely.

  The pain spread through her heart. She sobbed again, the tears blurring the vision of his perfect face.