by Drew Hayes
“Oh, right, you haven’t been here for Pan-Asian cuisine night. Just be glad we all have our own bathrooms. Also, the point was that you fucking wrecked them.”
“I had the benefit of knowledge on my side. The others went in blind, but I got to know what they could and couldn’t do. That let me tackle them efficiently, without having to worry about them secretly being explosive or having enough firepower to bring me down. First response is always the hardest, most dangerous work,” Owen explained.
“Yeah, I get it, humility, politeness, and blah blah blah. Did they at least get all of those things?”
“They did.” When Owen had told Dispatch about bringing his down, she’d updated him on the rest of the threat. The second wave had been smaller and less organized than the first; by the time a crew was picking up the remains of his fight, the rest had already been terminated.
“What do you think they wanted, anyway? To rob the food court?”
“Honestly, I think they were a test run,” Owen replied.
“Wait, that was a fucking beta trial?”
“It’s my theory.” Owen glanced out the window, marveling at how quickly they’d gotten the messes cleaned up and traffic flowing. “Those things were strong, but they had some serious design flaws. Add in the lack of a clear objective, and it points to someone seeing how his first batch of bots stacked up against the town’s Heroes. You’d be surprised how many tech-genius Supers use the exact same opening gambit.”
“Oooh, or what if the robots sprang to life and got away from him? They surged out of the laboratory, hell-bent on destruction of the human world. Titan, you may have just helped stop the robot-apocalypse.” Hexcellent reached over and patted him on the head, stretching her long arms to their limit. “Good boy.”
“You just pretty much drift along in your own world, don’t you?”
“I’m a quasi-celebrity. I think we can both agree that’s my right.” Hexcellent stopped patting as the town car whispered up to a curb. Before she could reach the handle, the door swung open and a hand literally covered in tattoos reached in. It delicately took Hexcellent’s hand and helped pull her out of the vehicle as Owen emerged on his own side.
He surfaced to see Hexcellent lip-locked with a man whose bald head and face were nearly as tattooed as his hands. After a kiss long enough to register as uncomfortable for all bystanders, the two finally parted.
“What kept you?” The tattooed man had a slightly southern twang to his voice, the sort of lingering accent that belonged to people who tried to remove it from their voice. Owen might not have noticed it, but his time with his ex-wife, Sally, and her south Texas family had trained him to pick up on the vibrations.
“Robots causing traffic,” she replied. Hexcellent turned around and pointed at Owen. “This big bastard is Titan, our team’s new Hero Liaison. Titan, this is Spyda, my boyfriend.”
“Pleasure to meet you.” Spyda walked around the car and grabbed Owen’s vast hand in an enthusiastic shake. The Hero was a bit taken back at how friendly this man who looked like an advertisement for biker gangs was being.
Hexcellent seemed to read the expression on his face, even through the mask. She explained, “Spyda is a guitarist for a hardcore metal band. Don’t let the look fool you, he’s actually a fucking softy.”
“But let’s keep that between us. Image and all to consider, I’m sure you understand.” Spyda released Owen’s hand and turned back to Hexcellent. “Darling, I hate to rush you, but the photographer doesn’t have much time left and we’ll both catch heat if the shoot isn’t done.”
“Lucky for you, my hot ass is always camera ready,” Hexcellent replied. “Titan, you can hang out in the prep room if you want. We shouldn’t be more than an hour.”
“You two go on ahead, I’m going to take a walk,” he said. “I’ll be here when you get out.”
“See you then,” Hexcellent called as they head toward the front door of the large office building.
“It was wonderful meeting you,” Spyda added before they vanished behind the frosted glass door.
As soon as they were gone, Owen turned and headed up the street. He’d seen an internet café on their way over, and Hexcellent had piqued his interest to see whatever footage was already online. Back in his day they had to rely on the scrap footage put together from cameras sewn into the team member’s costumes. Now, with a whole world watching, it would be interesting to look at an attack from so many different angles.
Besides, his experience told him that this wouldn’t be the last rampage of robots from whatever low-rent techie had cobbled them together. Best to see as much as he could and be ready for next time. If these things had really brought other Heroes down, Owen had a feeling he would be called in a lot sooner when they resurfaced.
20.
When Hexcellent emerged from her photo shoot, Owen was already waiting by the town car. Despite his best efforts at the internet café, he hadn’t been able to pull up much more than he’d learned from Dispatch. The civilian videos and pictures seemed to capture a few interesting moments of the robots fighting Heroes, but nothing that gave him information on their abilities beyond what he’d experienced personally. Of course, that didn’t mean such video didn’t exist, only that it wasn’t easily discoverable. Despite the advances in technology since he left the life, he suspected the DVA’s attitude on showing the public confidential information hadn’t changed.
“Sorry we ran over,” Hexcellent said, sliding into her seat. “That photographer was a shitshow. Had me changing outfits every five minutes and getting into impossible positions. If she weren’t so damn good I’d have told her to fuck off like twenty times.”
“Don’t worry about it, I found a way to kill time.”
“Let me take a shot in the dark: you spent it trying to learn more about those bots you fought.” Hexcellent flashed him a cocky grin as the town car began the drive back to the Mordent Holdings office.
“Am I that obvious?”
“Obvious seems like a mean way to put it. How about we say dedicated?” Hexcellent pulled her phone out and began checking mail and messages. “You’ve been with us for a few days now, and I’ve only seen you really light up two times: when you were pulling that fire-girl from the building, and when you were tearing those scrapheaps new metal assholes. After you darted off as soon as we left the car, it didn’t take a lot to figure out what was up.”
“You’re pretty observant,” Owen replied, glancing at her out of the side of his eye. Smart, determined, not shy about confrontation, and with an ability that showed strong potential. The more time he spent with Hexcellent, the more she seemed like a candidate for the HCP. It was certainly possible she’d rejected that sort of life, preferring the more pacifistic work of being on a PEERS team, but he had trouble buying such an idea. The girl had a streak of grit and violence running through her; a trait like that usually led to a job where it could be expressed.
“Let’s not get heavy on the compliments; like I said, you didn’t really make it hard.” Hexcellent’s eyes widened a touch as she stared into the depths of her phone’s screen. “Say, when you were researching, did you notice anything interesting about the fight at the mall?”
“I didn’t look it up,” Owen said. “Since I was there for all of it, there wasn’t anything I needed to know. I figured the time was better spent reading up on the first wave of attacks.”
“Ahhh. That explains it.” Hexcellent put her phone away and tried to keep a straight face, though a defiant smirk keep worming its way across her mouth.
“Going to tell me what’s so funny?”
“Hell fucking no. You can wait until we get back to the penthouse. This is too good to spoil.”
Owen considered pressing the subject, but thought better of it. Hexcellent was willful and stubborn; she’d demonstrated that since he first arrived. If she thought it was more fun to wait, then that is exactly what she would do. Besides, the day had gone pretty well. May as well let it
end on whatever positive note she had in mind.
Hours later, he would look back on that naivety with the clarity of hindsight and wonder when in his absence he’d allowed himself to get so stupid.
* * *
Lenny popped an antacid as he watched Gale walk over to him. Though her costume wasn’t especially sexualized, the woman had a certain appeal that no amount of clothing could bury. In his younger years, when libido was able to fight with bottom-lines and ethics, Lenny had tried to woo a few female Heroes. He’d even pulled it off a couple of times, but it never ended well. He was as married to his job as any of them, and when that was the case, the pressure got to be too much for a romantic relationship to bear. Still, seeing Gale stride across the conference room in Elemental Fury’s headquarters made him wish, just a little, that he was still young and dumb enough to swing for the fences.
“Gale, you look lovely, as always.” Lenny rose from the serviceable chair he’d been sitting in, taking her hand and shaking it firmly. While some female Heroes liked a warm welcome and perhaps a kiss to the cheek, Gale was all business.
“Lenny, a pleasure to see you.” Gale took her own seat, and Lenny followed suit. “I apologize for making you wait; the construct attack caused our whole team to be delayed.”
Lenny waved a hand through the air like he was trying to smack an invisible fly. “Please, it’s nothing. When you work with Heroes, you learn to write your appointments in pencil. There are far more important things out there than me; I’m just thankful you were willing to take this meeting at all.”
“Birdsman and Granite hold you in high esteem,” Gale said. The barest traces of a smile crested her lips. “Though I must admit, my own agent cursed you from here to the heavens when I told him I was taking a meeting with you.”
“Mick’s a solid guy, but he knows how to hold a grudge. Ever since a few of his A-listers decided to come over to my camp, he’s been convinced I’m out to steal every client he’s got.”
“And is that what brings you here today?” Gale asked.
“If I thought I had a shot at pulling it off, you’d better believe I’d try and woo you,” Lenny admitted. “But I do my research, and that means I know you’re the loyal type. So long as Mick does right by you, you’re going to stay with him. Of course, if he ever fails in that regard, expect to get some very nice wine with my card attached.”
“At least you’re honest about your intentions. Shall we get down to the business of why you’ve come here, then?”
“Gladly.” Lenny shifted slightly in his seat. The chairs were made for tall, powerful people and didn’t accommodate his small and round frame as adequately. “I’m here about you requesting to do an ability assessment with one of my clients.”
“I haven’t asked any. . . wait, you rep Titan?” The shock on her face was easily visible even through her mask.
“Always have, from the day he first stepped out of the Sizemore Tech HCP. Even sent him birthday cards during what I’ve chosen to think of as his ‘hiatus.’ I’d tell you he’s a good man and is out here trying to make right by the world, but I doubt you’d really take my word for it.”
“Agents aren’t exactly renowned for their truthfulness,” Gale said. “I take it you’re here to try and talk me out of the assessment, to tell me that I should just leave Titan alone and forget about him.”
“Talk you out of it? Why in the nine hells would I want to talk you out of it?” Lenny reached for the briefcase at his side, pulling it up and slapping it on the table. “Elemental Fury, the current top team in Brewster, testing out Titan, a living legend come forth from the past. People would sell their kids to see that kind of show. And not the black sheep, either, kids they really like.”
Gale felt herself grow suddenly uncomfortable. Despite being bigger, stronger, and overall more powerful than the bald man sitting before her, Gale had the unmistakable sensation that he was trying to make a play for control of the situation.
“Hero assessments are generally held in private,” she said.
“Oh sure, when they’re real assessments that makes total sense. But this isn’t a real assessment, is it? This is a pissing match you set up so that you could try and intimidate Titan into toeing the line.”
“I wouldn’t-”
“You don’t need to deny it or defend yourself to me. Honestly, I love the idea. The only problem is that you didn’t think big enough. If we’re going to do this, we’re going to make it profitable.” Lenny pulled out a stack of papers and shoved them over to Gale. “Basic contracts regarding filming and distribution rights of the event. Show them to Mick, but even he’ll admit I gave you a damn fair shake. Once you’ve signed we’ll get the scheduling worked out.”
Gale flipped through the pages, scanning paragraph after paragraph of small type and large words. Finally, she set it down and looked the short man dead in the eyes.
“Why are you doing this?”
“Because you created an unfair situation,” Lenny replied, snapping his briefcase shut. “If the assessment is private and you make Titan look like shit, then you get what you wanted: the old dog will feel like he’s not up to the life anymore. If it’s private and he stomps you all, however, nothing really bad happens to you. A little wound licking and maybe some humbled egos, but nothing horrid. To me, that seems like bullshit. Putting pride on the line is only a good way to gamble when both go in at equal stakes. Now, with an audience, if Titan handles that assessment like a pro, you get to look like start-ups who can’t hold a candle to the old guard. You can still call it off if you want, of course, but if you go forward with it then it will be under my terms.”
“Don’t you mean Titan’s terms?” Gale asked.
“That big lug has no idea I’m doing this. He’ll probably shit a chicken when he finds out. This is me, all me, doing my job and protecting my client’s interests.” Lenny hopped out of his chair, briefcase clutched firmly in hand. “Tell Mick to fax those over when they’re ready. He knows the number.”
“You may be the most ruthless agent I’ve ever spoken to, let alone dealt with,” Gale said, still a bit dumbfounded by Lenny’s surprise strategy.
“It’s also why I’m the best.” Lenny pulled out a business card and set it on the table. “Just in case you want to shop around for a new rep once this is over.”
“I thought you said there’d be wine, too.”
“Give me a little credit here,” Lenny said. “It’s already been delivered to your room.”
21.
As soon as he stepped through the door from the elevator hallway to the living room, Owen realized something was up. Granted, Hexcellent’s inability to stop smirking and snickering throughout the entire drive back had clued him in that he was in for some sort of surprise, but seeing Mr. Greene standing there, with Galvanize nearby, drove the point the rest of the way home.
“Oh shit, did I screw something up?” Owen held the door for Hexcellent, who scampered through and immediately made a beeline for the large television on the other side of the room. She snatched up the remote from Zone, who was sitting next to Bubble Bubble as she surfed the web on a slim tablet.
“Not at all,” Galvanize quickly assured him. “This is something that we knew would happen eventually. “It was part of the package when we chose you to fill the role of our Hero Liaison.”
“While that is true, we also had planned a nice, well-framed release of the information specially designed to cast you in a positive, crowd-tested, sentiment,” Mr. Greene added. He wasn’t angry; men like him were too proper to ever get angry. Instead, he was “putout” : a careful combination of annoyance, discontent, and resolve. Owen had known a lot of people like Greene in his life, and he’d prefer someone who called him a fucker and took a swing at him far above people who got put-out.
“Could someone at least tell me what I’m in trouble for?”
“You’re not in trouble, dumbass. You’re just not our little secret anymore.” Hexcellent made this an
nouncement just before she drilled her finger into the television’s volume button, filling the room with crystal clear sound from expensive surround-sound speakers.
“-which were cleaned up less than an hour later. Neither Elemental Fury nor Shifter’s Assembly were able to be reached for comment.
“If you’re just joining us, today in downtown Brewster several automated robots attempted to carve a path of destruction before being thwarted by several of our local Hero teams. Later tonight our team will tell you what this most recent uptick in violence will mean for your weekend.
“In related news, the most surprising part of today’s attack was not the robots themselves, but who appeared to help stop them.”
The picture on the television switched from the anchor with perfectly-sprayed hair and unnervingly white teeth to shaky footage clearly taken by someone with a cell phone. It only took Owen a glance to recognize what was happening on the film. It wasn’t hard to remember; after all, he’d been there only a couple of hours ago.
“Sources have confirmed that the man in the picture is in fact Titan, a Hero formerly associated with the Chicago area and known for both his strength and the scandal that drove him out of the public eye over a decade ago. Already people are having powerful reactions to his reappearance;, let’s go to Janice-”
Hexcellent hit mute, then turned to Owen. “Seems you still look enough like yourself to get recognized.”
Owen allowed himself a brief moment’s chuckle. “I bet that kid from the store opening is pissed he didn’t grab an autograph.”
“I’m glad you two find this so amusing, because your little escapade has torched our entire plan for announcing your new position and controlling the spin of the story,” Mr. Greene snapped. “Dozens of carefully planned, focus-group-tested events and promotions all rendered useless because you couldn’t stop yourself from punching some robots.”
“Hang on now, are you trying to give me shit for doing my job? Hero Liaisons are still Heroes, we have responsibilities to the public. I’ll say I’m sorry that this made controlling your precious image harder, but if you’re waiting for me to apologize for stopping threats to innocent people and property then you better have a toilet and a novel handy, cause it’ll be a while.”