During dinner, Edward had examined the palms of his hands edging toward frailness and trembling. His words I could ask the same of you, concerning Anna’s change of heart, rang aloud in her mind. Why had she stopped plans of divorcing him? She had ordered Elise to take the house off the market. She had the men remove the rental pieces and return the furniture that had been in storage to their original positions around the house. Anna had in effect re established things back to the way they were, or could have been, before she chose to divorce Edward.
Why, she asked once more.
“Perhaps for the same reason you brought me back here. To let me die,” Edward had said.
To let me die. His words resounded into Anna’s sleep followed by her voice echoing, I love you.?
Chapter 11
The next morning, Anna awoke to the smell of breakfast cooking. She showered and got dressed. Following the aroma of eggs and bacon, she descended the stairs. From the sound of the voices below, she concluded Theo had arrived.
“Well, hello stranger,” said Linda.
“It’s good to see you.” That was Theo.
“It’s about time.” Brad teased Theo about arriving after every one else.
“We were wondering where you were,” said Linda.
Reaching the base of the steps, Anna crossed the foyer and stood by the kitchen door. Theo was at the stove hugging Serine as Edward looked on. David had yet to come downstairs.
“When did you get in?” Serine asked Theo.
“This morning.” Theo turned back to the range and flipped the pancakes on the griddle. Then, he walked to the sink and began whipping eggs in a bowl. Theo’s slow lope and careful ministrations reminded Anna of her father. Unlike Serine, the youngest, Theo had always been Anna’s unofficial baby, the truly naive one, who gave generously and from his heart without regard. Anna often thought Theo trusted others too much for his own good.
Anna entered the kitchen and walked to him. “Since when did you start making breakfast?”
“Since I realized that women weren’t put on this earth to simply cook and clean.” Theo ceased stirring the eggs, killed the flame under the pancakes, and embraced her.
“Sorry I’m late,” he whispered.
“I’m so glad you’re home,” she whispered back.
Theo served breakfast to Edward, Serine, Linda, and Brad at the kitchen table then said to Anna, “Let’s go into the dining room.” Hesitant and ashamed of her need for attention, she followed. Theo sat in Edward’s chair. “The food should keep them busy for half an hour or so.”
“You mean before they miss us.”
Theo smiled.
“Millicent didn’t come with you?” Anna handed Theo a napkin. Reminded of his manners, he laid it upon his thigh.
Theo had dated many women throughout college, yet he had settled on fellow student Millicent Regarde when nearing the end of earning his MBA. Anna had never liked Millicent. As the owner of a mortgage brokerage, she held too much in common with Ed ward. Anna found her to be quite aggressive, and she was quick to summon Daddy whenever the world presented its imperfections.
“She’s merging the brokerage with her father’s real estate firm,” Theo said. “They’re moving into his building this week.” Millicent’s parents, Thelonius and Henrietta Regarde, carried much distinction in black society of Chicago. Theo said little of Millicent when he called each Friday evening.
“I can’t believe you’ve been married for five years already. How are things with you and Millicent?”
“She’s busy finding new clients. With the recession, let’s just say things have been better for the mortgage business.” Theo wiped his mouth then let his napkin drop onto the plate. His love for Millicent reminded Anna too much of her loyalty and commitment to Edward.
“I mean between you and her.” Anna clarified her question.
“That’s another matter.” Theo’s lips appeared on the edge of trembling, or perhaps Anna misread them in her growing anxiety. She reached out and touched his hand. Theo patted hers, pulled away and then said, “So what’s this I hear about David confronting you last night about moving to France?”
“It was Serine who raised the issue. Funny thing is I can’t imagine how she learned I was moving.”
“That would be Aunt Elise. Serine called her when Dad told us about the divorce and you stopped returning our messages.”
“It was hard telling all of you that I wanted to leave your father, end the marriage. I needed room to think.”
“I understood. So did Linda and Brad.” Theo sipped his coffee. “Serine, on the other hand ... well ... she feels abandoned.”
“I wasn’t leaving her. Why didn’t you mention this to me sooner? Although, you did warn me. I shouldn’t have pulled away,” Anna confessed.
“You needed to take care of yourself.” Theo traced the rim of his plate with his forefinger. Unlike his siblings, he refused to accept Anna’s silence. When the other three stopped phoning and leaving messages, he persisted in calling.
She sank back into her chair. “Are you angry that I’m moving to France?”
“No. I hope you’re still going.” Theo glanced back at the doorway leading to the kitchen where Edward was still sitting at the kitchen table with Linda, Brad, and Serine.
“I can’t think about that now. Your father needs me.”
“This is what I don’t understand about you.” Theo hit his finger upon the table. Confusion flooded Anna. “It was obvious to me and Linda that you needed to live your life. Dad couldn’t support you doing that. In fact, I’m surprised you stayed this long.”
“And why is that?”
“The man cheated on you. He was a constant philanderer. He was never around.”
“He provided all of us a good life,” Anna said.
“And you were unhappy.”
“That was my choice.”
“It affected us.” Theo knitted his brows. “Do you know what it’s like to see your mother never happy, always working, never smiling? It doesn’t matter that the house you live in is large and beautiful and filled with toys you never play with, or that your father wears two-thousand-dollar suits and is respected, envied, or both for the work he does.” Theo drew closer. “It doesn’t even matter that your mother acts like everything is fine, and never complains about her husband. You know.” Again Theo touched his forefinger to the table.
Anna’s eyes burned with a truth too large to encompass and with a boldness she could not ignore.
David entered the dining room. “Hey, bro!” Theo stood, David reached out, and the two embraced. “When’d you get in?”
“Early this morning. Around seven,” Theo said. “I rented a car at the airport and called Linda and Brad to let me in.”
“I didn’t hear the phone ring,” Anna said.
“I called their cell.” Theo glanced back. Anna reminisced upon the days when there were no cell phones and she could decipher her children’s lives by the calls they made and received.
Theo pointed to David’s bag. “Leaving so soon?”
“Heather’s dad just died.” David looked past Theo’s shoulder to Anna. His body held restrained sadness. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
“Take your time.” Anna went to him. “Tell Heather I’m praying for her. If she needs anything—”
“I’ll do that.” David lifted his bag. Anna stretched up and kissed his forehead. The memory of accusations hurled the prior evening was a far-gone blur. David left.
Anna and Theo were back at the table when Serine entered the dining room. “So why are you two hiding in here,” she said. Serine sat. “We’re not hiding.” Theo smiled.
Serine threw Anna a cautious smile. “Everyone knows that you’re Mom’s favorite.”
“I doubt that.” Theo tapped his plate. “If memory serves me correctly, I received my share of banishments to my room and was grounded just as much as anyone. Now you on the other hand—”
“You have no i
dea what it was like for me here with Mom when you and Linda were away at college.”
“I know enough.” Theo smirked. “You got away with pretty much all you wanted.”
“I beg to differ. But, being that you’re so much in-the-know, has Mom given you the heads-up on her plans to move to Paris?”
“We discussed this last evening,” Anna intervened. “And your father informed me he had spoken to you.”
“He informed me that I was rude to you.” Serine arched her back against the web of haughtiness spun by her words. “I’m speaking nicely this morning.”
“What Mom does with her life is her business,” Theo said. “If she wants to move to France, then—”
“So you knew about this?”
“Maybe if you bothered to call her, you would, too,” Theo shot back.
“I wasn’t the one who stopped calling.” Serine’s shoulders slumped. “What’s your point, Serine?”
“It’s not just my point. David agrees, too.”
“Well right now he’s got other things on his mind,” Theo said, “Heather’s father just died. He’s on his way up to Santa Rosa for the funeral.”
“Heather,” Serine murmured then slumped down onto the chair. “She can be a pain in the neck. Then again, what can you expect from a white woman?”
“What’s that?” Anna snapped.
Theo rolled his eyes. “Here we go again.”
When David announced his engagement eight years ago, it had taken the family a moment to adjust to the notion of his wife being white. Anna, Theo, and Linda had come to embrace Heather during the first year of her and David’s marriage. While Edward maintained a cordial and cool exterior, Anna suspected he approved of Heather’s devotion. He had visited David and Heather many times in the last two years. Edward always returned singing Heather’s praises. That troubled Anna. Like Edward, David could be headlong and stubborn. Anna worried that Heather was seeking to please David at the expense of her own needs.
“Heather is so unhappy,” Serine retorted. “With her father dead, I doubt she’ll be with David much longer.”
“And how do you know this?” Anna asked.
“He told me,” Serine said.
“When?”
Theo shifted to Anna. “They’ve been having problems for a while,” he said.
“What kind of problems?”
“Well you know, David’s busy at the firm. He comes home late,” Theo explained. “Heather’s not in the greatest of moods after being home with the children all day.”
“I can certainly relate to that.” Anna chuckled.
Theo continued. “Then with Heather’s father getting sick and her traveling back and forth...”
“She’s high maintenance,” Serine blurted. She pursed her lips. “Always whining. Nothing like Millicent.”
“Now wait a minute.” Theo flashed his hand. “Raising two kids is hard. Heather—”
“Like you would know,” Serine snapped. “Then again, Millicent isn’t as eager to be barefoot and pregnant as Heather—”
“That’s enough.” Anna felt like a referee.
Linda burst into the dining room, “Daddy’s fallen and bumped his head!”
Anna rushed upstairs. Theo, Serine, and Linda raced behind.
“Edward. What happened?” She entered the bedroom and joined Brad who was kneeling beside Edward.
“I was dizzy. I’ll be all right—” Edward moved to sit up.
“Let us help you.” Brad supported his back. Theo bent over to assist. Edward batted away their hands. “I told you I’m fine.”
Edward fell back upon Anna’s lap. Theo and Brad exchanged glances then looked to Anna.
“Perhaps we need to clear the room.” Linda said. She and Serine left. Theo and Brad helped Edward to the bed.
“I need to speak to David as soon as he reaches Santa Rosa,” Edwards murmured.
Theo nodded.
“We’ll be downstairs,” Brad said. He and Theo moved to leave.
Edward lay down. Anna drew the covers onto him. “Yesterday was tiring. You were up late last night.” Edward groaned.
“You need to rest,” she said.
“I’ll be fine.” Edward tried to sit up.
Anna noticed the frailness of his neck and arms. Silent worry coursed through her. It was happening. Edward was beginning to slip away.
“I’m calling Dr. Grimes.”
“And what is he going to do?” Edward caught her stare.
A slow burning sensation spread throughout Anna. “I’m calling him, and that’s that.” She hurried across the hall to Theo’s room and dialed the oncologist.
“I’ve been waiting for your call,” Dr. Grimes said when greeting her.
“He fell and hit his head. He was dizzy. It’s only been three weeks,” she said.
“How’s he now?”
“Fine, but he’s weak and tired. He’s lost a lot of weight.”
“That’s to be expected.”
“I thought you said we had three to six months.”
“Each case is different.”
“Is that how you see Edward, as another case?” Anna then recalled Grimes’ concern about her re-entering Edward’s life and caring for him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way.”
“None necessary,” Grimes said. “I can readmit him, but it sounds like you might need a hospice nurse.”
“He’s not bedridden. And, the kids are here.”
“The first sign of the disease taking over is exhibited by stumbling and falling. My guess is that Edward has been feeling weaker than he’s been letting on. While he hasn’t taken to sleeping a lot, he’s probably wanting to lay down more than he feels comfortable saying.”
“And what is the hospice nurse going to do? Make him take naps? Sit around and wait for him to keel over?”
“First off, she’s going to assess his energy level. Whether you know it or not, it’s easier for him to tell the nurse how he’s feeling than you. Edward doesn’t want to let you or the children down. He’s accustomed to you and them seeing him strong and independent. He’s shedding that demeanor.” Anna cringed at the word shedding. It made her think of a snake losing its skin.
“Anna, things are going to get messy. The Edward you know is changing.”
“And whose side are you on?”
“Edward’s ... and yours. It’s good that you’ve taken him home. Very few patients get that. But you and your children need to be prepared. My sense is that you are a large part of their preparation. Don’t squander your time freaking out when things start happening. Instead, be available to him.”
“Thanks, for the advice. I’ll call you if anything changes.” Anna wasn’t ready for hospice.?
Chapter 12
Anna left Edward’s room. Theo met her on the second floor landing. “What did the doctor say?”
“Your father’s sleeping,” Anna ignored his words. “Get everybody and let’s gather in the dining room.”
They all filed into the dining room and took their usual places. Anna sat at the end of the oblong table in the chair she had occupied the prior evening. She placed her palms upon the table and glanced at the empty seat on the other end where Edward always sat.
“Your father’s resting.” Those seated around the table remained somber. “I thought this was as good a time as any for us to talk.” As a way of grounding herself, Anna then repeated what she had said when she had called them about Edward’s illness. “Your father has cancer of the gallbladder. He was diagnosed last November. He underwent surgery then eight months of chemotherapy. The chemo failed. Now he’s dying. The doctor told me he had three to six months to live. Now this morning—” Anna felt herself about to break. Theo stood and caressed her shoulders. She reached back and patted his hand.
“I just want to ask,” Serine started, “did anyone know about this before Mom called? Or was that the first time you knew about Dad’s illness?” She looked to Anna then surveyed the faces around th
e table.
Brad lifted Linda’s hand then said, “Linda and I knew nothing until Anna called.” Linda nodded in agreement.
Serine aimed her attention to Theo who stood behind Anna.
“I knew nothing until Mom called.” His hands remained still on Anna’s shoulders.
“I find that hard to believe,” Serine said. “Everyone knows you and Mom talk all the time.” Serine threw Anna a sterner glance. “And what’s that got to do with Dad and his cancer?” Theo said. “You haven’t answered my question,” Serine fired again. “I didn’t give you the answer you wanted,” Theo said.
“I can tell when people are lying.”
“What is your point?” Anna asked.
Serine turned to Anna. “When did you find out Daddy was sick?”
“A few days before I called you.”
Serine hit her with another piercing stare. “And just how did you find out?”
“We’ve had about enough of this,” Theo intervened.
“No, let us finish.” Anna waved him back. “I learned your father was dying of cancer the day he agreed to the divorce.”
“And you didn’t know until then?” Serine asked.
“No. I didn’t,” Anna said. “He had the surgery last January. Bryce said he would be away for two months, that it was for business.” Anna had thought it was another stall tactic.
“And you never noticed him exhibiting any weakness from the chemo? Or were you so engaged in the battle of wanting to leave him that you never once noticed that he wasn’t looking well?” Anguished fury seared in Serine’s eyes, the same shade of light brown verging on amber like Edward’s. “Maybe your plans for moving to France obscured your vision.”
“What’s your point?” Theo started toward her. Again Anna flashed her palm. But Theo continued. “This is not some courtroom with hoodlums off the street and you the prosecutor putting them in jail. This is Mom, our mother, in case you’ve forgotten. When she found out about Dad’s illness has nothing to do with the situation at hand.”
“And that situation being?” Serine smirked.
“That you seem intent on taking out your frustrations on Mom because things aren’t going the way you want.”
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