The Drift

by Diane Dru Botsford

She shot upwards through the ceiling and disappeared.

  PLANET DESIGNATION: UNKNOWN

  STATUS: UNKNOWN

  TIME: UNKNOWN…UNKNOWN…UNKNOWN…

  He stumbled across darkness, through a rippling pool, and out into a pool of white light.

  Where the hell was he, for crying out loud?

  He squeezed his eyes shut. That begged a larger question.

  Who the hell was he? For the life of him, he couldn’t remember his name.

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  Eyes closed, he felt warmth. Clean air. Complete stillness. No sounds of animals or civilization, just lapping water. Directly behind him. He opened his eyes. It was too bright to see much of anything.

  He whirled around, coming face-to-face with a vertical stone ring at least three times his height. The ring loomed over him, its center filled with a bluish puddle of water.

  He found the massive thing familiar. Almost comforting in an odd sort of way.

  As if he and the ring were old friends.

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  He’d been here before.

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  He knew that sound.

  Thump.

  He knew his name. He remembered what had happened.

  Jack turned his back on the Stargate. Peered into the over-bright white world around him.

  The crystal. He’d pulled it and now…

  Thump. Thump-thump. Thump-thump.

  His heart pounded in his chest. He got it. Why did it have to be so frigging loud?

  He raised an arm, expecting to find the crystal in his hand. Instead, a glowing-white strand wavered into view. He raised his other arm. Another shimmering strand floated up.

  He glanced down at his body. No boots. No legs.

  Thump-thump.

  No nothing.

  “Crap.” Something must’ve gone wrong. When he’d pulled the crystal, he must’ve gotten himself killed.

  He groaned. “Please don’t tell me I’ve ascended.”

  Waving his hands in front of his face did squat. More strands slithered back and forth. Like a bunch of ribbons blowing in the breeze.

  Bright, shiny ribbons. Almost mesmerizing.

  Almost peaceful.

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  Would ascension be so bad?

  No more casualty reports. No more sending good men and women to their deaths. No more sitting back and feeling useless while those same men and women became nothing more than a line on a piece of paper.

  If he’d ascended, maybe he could finish what Daniel had set out to do. Maybe he could go kick some Goa’uld butt. Wipe them out before Oma and her gang caught up with him.

  Keep Earth safe.

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  Hell, maybe he’d give himself that peace of mind he always wanted.

  “Is this what you truly wish, O’Neill? To ascend?”

  Jack recognized the voice. “Skaara?”

  Another cluster of ribbony strands blossomed from out of nowhere. The strands darkened. Solidified.

  Skaara gazed at him, patiently. Calm. For all the kid’s youth before he’d taken a walk on the Oma-side, it was Jack who suddenly felt very young. And very foolish.

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  Skaara’s white robes flapped in a breeze Jack couldn’t feel.

  Wait a moment.

  Jack glanced down at where his body should’ve been. With relief, he took in the sight of his green BDUs, his black t-shirt, his black boots.

  “That’s funny,” he said. “I could’ve sworn I wore camo when I got here.”

  Skaara raised an eyebrow.

  Jack explained. “You know, beige and tan camouflage. Nice way to blend in with the sand and all that.”

  “Blend in.” Skaara gestured toward Jack’s green BDUs. “This is how you see yourself.”

  Jack shrugged. “I always said they’d bury me in my BDUs.”

  “You are not dead, O’Neill.”

  “Yeah, I didn’t think as much.” His eyes rested on the Stargate, its event horizon thwaping against the ring’s stony sides. “But this is it, right? I’m gonna ascend?”

  “If that is your wish. What about Earth?”

  That was the first thing he’d take care of. Quick jaunt to Antarctica. Shut down that device before it ripped his favorite planet in two, then onward and upward.

  Watch out, you slimy Goa’uld bastards, I’m coming.

  “How about an orientation tour?” he asked Skaara.

  “Ascended, you will see the universe, but, O’Neill,” Skaara stepped closer, “you cannot interfere. You can do nothing.” He tilted his head. “But that is not who you are.”

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  “I don’t know, Skaara. Maybe…” He sighed. “Maybe I — ”

  Thwap.

  A human strode through the gate. It was Huang —  Sorta. The old man looked younger, more like when Jack first met him. His black hair had grown back in. His beard was neat, trimmed. Barely gray. He wore classic Jaffa armor, a gray cloak hanging from his left shoulder. A jade pin shaped like a dragon held the cloak in place.

  And on his forehead was Lord Yu’s sigil etched in gold. Just like a First Prime.

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  Huang glanced at Skaara. “You. I recognize you.”

  Skaara dipped his head in greeting. “It is good to see you again, Huang Sun Tzu.”

  Sun Tzu? It took a moment for Jack to remember this guy was a clone. A copy. A several thousand year-old Xerox of the real McCoy.

  Huang peered into the void. He inhaled deeply. “There is a tranquility here. A solace I have not felt for many years. Not since…”

  “Antarctica?” Skaara stepped up beside Jack.

  Huang turned to face them. As he did, the lines on his face smoothed out. Within moments, Jack realized he was looking at a younger, maybe twenty year-old version of Huang.

  “I was not happy in Antarctica, but, I came to understand its power. Nature unbridled. Free from expectation. Hope. The land’s nature was relentless. Unforgiving, and yet, it was honest. Truthful.”

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  Huang ran a finger along the gold brand on his forehead. “At the time, I did not recognize that truth.”

  Jack scowled. “What would you know about truth? Your lies almost got my people killed — ”

  “O’Neill,” warned Skaara. “To ascend requires giving up one’s burdens. Make peace with your past. Let it go.”

  Let it go. Jack dropped his head. Could he do that? For the first time in a long while, he didn’t know what to do. Usually, he’d just go by his gut. Do the right thing. But now? Could he let Daniel, Carter, and Teal’c just die? Let Earth suffer?

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  A hand squeezed his shoulder. Huang. “’Great is the hero who would die for their country, but would much rather live.’”

  Jack sighed. He was tired of all the quotes, all the brouhaha of burdens. Of letting go.

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  He was worn out, period.

  “Can we bypass the speeches and just move things along?” He needed to get to Earth. Try and stop that device before things got any worse.

  “Sun Tzu’s quote was meant for you, O’Neill.” Huang dropped his hand from Jack’s shoulder. “It is you who must promise to heed his words. You must live. Lead. If not for yourself, then for others.

  “I was never meant to do so.” Huang bowed toward the waiting Skaara. “I was never really meant to be.”

  Calm settled over the man’s face. A calm Jack envied.

  “So that’s it,” Jack said, surprised at how bitter his words sounded. “I’m supposed to go back there, grab the crystal and then just leave you behind? Well, what if I want to be the one left behind? What if — ?” He turned away, disgusted. Not with them. With himself. He was so tired. Tired of losing. Tired of winning.

  Tired of fighting.

  Clink. Snap. Clink. Snap.

  �
��Still playing with the Zippo, Skaara?”

  “Do you want it back, O’Neill?”

  “No.” Jack kept his gaze on the void ahead of him. “I told you years ago, keep it. It’s yours.”

  “And yet, you were drawn to retrieve the lighter when I left.” Clink. Snap.

  “I don’t know, Skaara. Maybe… Maybe I just hated to see it go to waste.”

  “Do you know why?”

  Jack turned back around to face his old friend. Huang was gone. “Because I couldn’t let go.”

  Skaara held out the lighter. “Hold on to your life, O’Neill. I promise, it will be worth living. For you, and the many you will touch.”

  “If you say so.” Jack had heard the same rhetoric from Skaara before, mere hours after Abydos and everyone on it had ascended.

  “You do not believe me?” Skaara held out the lighter.

  Thump. Thump-thump.

  “Then believe in yourself.”

  Jack took the lighter. In the white light of the void, it felt solid. Real. A bit of metal and flint that had become an anchor in his upside-down life.

  He wrapped his fingers around the metal casing.

  The void went black.

  P3Y-702/KUNLUN/ELYSIUM PEDION

  19 AUG 04/0720 HRS MCMURDO STATION

  19 AUG 04/1420 HRS STARGATE COMMAND

  There was no sound. No movement. No change.

  The platform’s translucent panels stayed fixed in a constant blue. If it wasn’t for the breeze blowing across Sam’s neck, she’d swear she was looking at a photograph. General O’Neill and Huang appeared frozen, their hands wrapped around the control crystal, their knuckles white as if in some sort of death grip.

  In the past five minutes, neither man had moved. From where she stood by the doorway, it didn’t even look like they were breathing. In between their hands, she could see the control crystal emit a steady red glow.

  That could be a good or bad. She had no way of knowing. Her scanner wasn’t of any use, the needle unmoving from its basically neutral position.

  The breeze picked up. Hot air blew through the chamber, sending sand and dirt in a swirl across the silver and marble floor. She checked her watch again. Ten minutes.

  “Sir?”

  General O’Neill didn’t even blink.

  “General!”

  Nothing.

  The crystal was active. Their job was done.

  Why wasn’t there any seismic activity, and more importantly, why weren’t they moving?

  She waved a hand in front of the general’s face. He didn’t flinch.

  The needle wobbled.

  “General?”

  The needle pinged. Hard and to the right.

  “Huang?”

  Beneath Sam’s boots, she felt a low rumble. Getting louder and stronger by the moment.

  A column crashed behind the platform.

  The men remained frozen. Almost as if they were in the grips of some sort of stasis.

  Another column crashed. Pulverized stone and a millennium of dust sprayed across the chamber.

  Should she pull them off the crystal? Shake them awake?

  Sam hesitated, knowing she had to do something and do it fast, but the question was what? The wrong move could crack the ground open, swallow the gate, and leave them stranded.

  And Earth still in trouble.

  The tremor grew stronger. Debris and stone dust rained down from the ceiling.

  She could leave now, bug out before the gate was lost. Maybe find another way to stop the terra-forming device in Antarctica. She looked at General O’Neill and wondered, could she do that? Could she leave him behind?

  “You said to trust my gut.” She grabbed his arm and pulled.

  Nothing.

  “Jack!”

  His elbow jerked. She stumbled backwards from the sudden movement.

  “Carter?” He turned toward her, the crystal in his hands.

  “Sir! The bracket.” She climbed to her feet and ran around the platform to face him.

  Huang shoved the general aside. “Hurry, O’Neill.” He plunged his left hand into the bracket.

  The shaking subsided. While she could still feel it beneath her, the earlier roar had lessened to a sound like distant thunder.

  “I don’t understand,” she told the general. “I thought — ”

  “Leave!” Huang insisted.

  “Sir?”

  General O’Neill kept his gaze on Huang. “It’s what he wants.”

  “Do not lie, O’Neill. It is what we both want.” He bent over the platform, his face twisted in pain.

  A thin stream of light erupted from his back. Huang shot back up and Sam gasped.

  The man’s face was covered in dozens of light particles swimming across his skin. The particles expanded. Moved down through his arms, his chest, his legs.

  “His body’s de-molecularizing,” she said in awe. “Breaking down to the quantum level right before our eyes.”

  “We have to go, Carter.” General O’Neill grabbed his pack from the ground and stuffed the crystal inside.

  Sam looked again at Huang —  or what was left of him. Most of his body was covered in agitated light particles, swarming around each other in a state of flux. All she could see was his left arm shoved down in the bracket, a corner of his mouth, a bit of forehead still covered in dirt. His brown eyes widened, not in fear, but in astonishment.

  The general slung the pack over his shoulder and swooped up his P90. He ran for the doorway. “Now, Carter!”

  Sam broke eye contact and raced after the general.

  “O’Neill!” Huang shouted.

  He stopped at the doorway.

  “Do not break your promise!”

  Sam whirled toward General O’Neill, his haggard face giving her no clue as to what Huang meant. He glanced at Huang and then back at Sam.

  “Sir?”

  “Come on, Carter. Let’s go home.”

  Within the darkness sparked a single flame. A candle’s light never meant to shine upon the shores of man.

  Between one moment and the next, another current winnowed across the ever-present stream. He had returned, his youthful energy sending ripples across dimensions she’d yet to share.

  And share she would. She knew now that his yearning for companionship had nearly caused yet another tear in the fabric.

  An unanchored boat will only drift.

  His return meant yet another repair accomplished beyond the Others’ view. If they discovered what had been done, she would be banished, having broken their highest law. Interference in the lower planes was forbidden.

  Even if much of what occurred had been their doing.

  Or lack thereof.

  “Are things as they should be?” she asked.

  “See for yourself,” Skaara answered.

  Galaxies were born. Suns imploded. Black holes plunged into nothing.

  A new flame burst into being. “Weiyan?”

  And then another. “Father?”

  Joy. Rapture. Twin comets streaked beyond a nebula. They became one. Broke apart and spiraled beyond a moon.

  Soon she must teach them both what it meant to be ascended, but for now… For now she would allow father and daughter this moment of reunion.

  “And the device?” she asked Skaara. “You are certain?”

  “He will do the right thing, Oma. He always does.”

  MARBLE POINT AIRSTRIP, ANTARCTICA

  19 AUG 04/1130 HRS MCMURDO STATION

  Daniel sat in the rear of the chopper with Jack and Sam, fighting back a yawn. They took off from Marble Point and headed for the outpost. A golden-yellow smudge appeared on the horizon, the first signs of sunrise’s imminent approach. Jack and Sam looked equally worn out. Especially Jack. He kept his eyes front, his mouth shut, the pack containing the crystal secured to his lap.

  Whatever had happened on P3Y-702, Jack wasn’t talking about it. Not even to Sam. Once they’d returned through the gate, and ridden to Peterse
n, Daniel had offered to fly back with Jack so he’d have someone to talk to. Someone to help him work through why Huang had stayed behind instead.

  Jack had insisted Daniel fly with Sam. As the F-302 flew south, she’d explained to Daniel what she’d seen, but even she had no idea why Huang had stayed. And while her description of Huang’s de-molecularization sounded extraordinary, Daniel had no way to know what it meant.

  The smudge on the horizon spread, becoming a thin line of yellow against the gray predawn. He checked his watch. Thirty-five minutes till sunrise. “We’re sure this is going to work?”

  “If Skaara says it will,” Jack said, “then it will.”

  “Okay.” Daniel knew Jack could be blunt when the need arose. “I’d like to stay for a few weeks, see if there are any inscriptions around the device.”

  Sam grinned. “I’d like to as well, sir. The technology might come in handy in — ”

  “Will it help us fight the Goa’uld?”

  “I don’t how, sir, but I’d like to think we could figure out a way to harness its abilities for use on Earth.”

  “Can you copy the Ancients’ doohickeys on your own?”

  Sam’s eyes widened. “No, sir. That would require a level of skill that — ”

  “Daniel, don’t you have a treaty to sort out?”

  “Paul Davis can work that out.” Daniel gestured toward the bag in Jack’s lap. “What you’re carrying there, and how that platform fits into what happened to the Ancients, don’t you think it’s worth — ?”

  “I’m tired of thinking.” Jack closed his eyes.

  ANCIENT OUTPOST, ANTARCTICA

  19 AUG 04/1140 HRS MCMURDO STATION

  Daniel groaned when he heard they’d have to take the emergency stairs down to the outpost. It made sense, given the on-going tremors, but still…

  Halfway down the spiral staircase, Daniel quit complaining. Another tremor hit. The steps shook, chunks of ice plummeting down on their heads. He stopped, gripped the railing, and prayed it would be over soon.

  Jack didn’t say a word, he just kept going. Jumping over fallen ice, taking two steps at a time. One hand on the railing, Daniel followed with Sam bringing up the rear. Jack’s single-mindedness had its advantages, Daniel knew that, but it had gotten them into as much trouble as out of it in the past. He wasn’t sure his friend’s determination would be enough to command the SGC for the long haul. Especially if Jack seemed so miserable doing it.