“Good evening, Miss Hall. I hope you enjoyed the festivities.” The sides of Greene’s lip rose in a smile. “The fireworks were a nice touch, if a bit…unexpected.”
“They were nice. I hadn’t seen any in a long time.”
He nodded. “Then I suppose I won’t bother asking if you saw who was responsible.”
“I didn’t.” And that was the truth. Mostly. I hadn’t actually seen the person do it, but I did remember seeing someone (the same someone who’d been talking with Tasha, I thought) with something suspiciously like a burn mark on their pants. But that wasn’t concrete proof.
“Very well. Do you mind if we talk in my office?”
Yes! “Nope.”
I thought I saw his lips twitch, but he’d been turning away from me, so I could’ve been wrong.
Wordlessly, he led me into the North Tower and to his office. He closed the door and then took a seat behind his desk. For a minute, we just stared at each other in silence. His eyes were calm. “Have you had enough time to think things over?”
“Yeah.” I bit my lip. “But I have a question first.”
“Please.” He inclined his head. “Ask away.”
“Are you going to keep, well, keeping stuff from me?”
He didn’t answer immediately. He sighed, then said, “I wish I could give you an honest answer. Or rather, the answer I know you’d like to hear. Unfortunately, I can’t. If I believe the situation calls for it, I’ll do what I feel is right—even if that means lying to you.”
“I see.” It was petty, but a small part of me liked giving his words back to him.
“Keeping information from you isn’t done out of spite or distrust. I think you know this, or you should. The New Orlando branch isn’t the only CGE in existence, which means our agents aren’t the only agents I have to think about. I have to do what I believe is best for us, but for the others as well. Sometimes, though I’m sure many would disagree, that does mean keeping some information from people, and I don’t mean just you or the younger Prospects. I have to look at the CGE as a whole, not just as parts. Each part can and does run separately, but they run better together. Smoother.”
“I understand. And thanks—for not just telling me what you think I want to hear.”
“Is that one of your…conditions to staying?”
“No, I guess not.” Linc’s words bounced around in my head. If you want to leave, then you can. If you want to stay, then you can do that too. Linc’d been right about that. And he’d been right about Greene, when he said Greene hadn’t kept the truth from me to hurt me. But I wasn’t telling Linc he was right. He’d just let it go to his head.
When Greene didn’t say anything else, I took that to mean the ball was still in my court. If I’d been playing basketball, I would’ve wanted to keep it that way, but right then, I wanted someone to steal the darn thing.
I sighed and struggled not to let my frown show. “I’m in,” I said, thinking of Linc’s words again. Being at the CGE wasn’t exactly a game, but you were in or you were out. Another thing Linc had right. He was sure racking them up today.
“And your trust in me?”
“I don’t know.”
“I understand. However, I’m glad you’ve decided to stay.”
“Thanks.”
“I’d like you to have something.”
“Are you trying to bribe me again?” The words escaped before I could stop them. I slapped a hand over my mouth, and when I lowered it to apologize, Greene just shook his head.
He’d been reaching down for something, but his hand froze, and all I could think was ‘crap.’ But then he laughed. “Had I been trying to bribe you, I would have offered it to you before you told me your decision. So no, this is not a bribe and there are no conditions with it. After our last talk, I had some things brought up from storage. I thought you’d like to have them.” Pushing back from his desk, he opened his top drawer and pulled out a small stack of slender books. He set them in front of me.
“What are they?”
“Your mother’s journals.”
CHAPTER 20
Wide-eyed, I looked at Greene, then the journals, then Greene again. “My mom’s?” I started to reach out but pulled my hand back and dropped it to my lap.
Greene nodded. “Yes. She left them here when she retired. I vaguely remembered her leaving a few things behind, so I asked a few staff members to look in storage. These are what they found. I’ve had them for a few days. I hope you’ll forgive me for not giving them to you sooner, but I thought they might have more importance today, for your graduation, even if it isn’t a real one.”
My gaze landed on the journals again. There were…five of them.
“They’re yours, Miss Hall.” He sent me a soft smile. “And before you ask, I had planned on giving them to you whether you stayed or not.” He eyed me. “Do you not want them?”
“No, I do…”
He pushed them toward me. “I’m sure your mother would have wanted you to have them.”
Leaning forward, I picked them up one by one. They were a matching set. Leather, with the initials FJD embroidered–or maybe it was embossed?—on them. Fiona Jo Donovan. My mom’s initials. I pulled them against me, held them tight. “Thanks,” I whispered.
“You’re welcome.” He pointed to the books. “There were more, I believe, though I’m afraid these were the only ones found. Maybe she took them with her, or maybe they were thrown away. It’s been over ten years, so there’s no way to be certain.”
I nodded.
After a minute, when I hadn’t moved or said anything else, he raised an eyebrow. “Was there something else you needed?”
“What? Sorry, no.” I rose and went to the door. When I had it open, I turned back, said, “Thanks,” then left.
As soon as I was back in my room, I dropped to the bed and flipped through a few pages of each journal to find the oldest. When I found it, I set the others aside and started to read.
Day Seven
I can’t believe I’m sharing my feelings with a stupid book. The Assistant Director figured it would help me gather my thoughts or something. I’m not sure I believe him but whatev. It can’t hurt, right? I’ve been here a week though and he seems nice enough. But he knows too much. Like, everything. It’s kind of weirding me out.
He thinks I’ll like it at the CGE, if I get there and give it a real shot. Considering he found me on the streets about to have to my head bashed in by a—what’d he call it?—some demon or another, I’d say that was pretty much guaranteed. I owed him, didn’t I? So I said I’d give it a try.
Right now, ADG (Assistant Director Greene) has me and the others reading about the place. The Consortium for Genetic Engineering. Weird name, but whatev. They seem to do a lot of good stuff besides demon hunting, like research for diseases and stuff like that. And they took me off the streets, so they can’t be all that bad.
Apparently I can’t join Phase One until I have my GED, so I’ve been studying for that too. I hated school when I went (which wasn’t often before I dropped out), but the Director says to give it a few more months and then I can study demons.
Maybe I shouldn’t complain too much. I get a bed, food, and clothes. That’s enough to keep me here for now. I have enough for a train ticket, so if things go South, I can always leave. Not sure where I’d go, but I’ve always wanted to see New York.
Pressing my fingers to the page, I gently ran them over the words. These were my mom’s thoughts and feelings and…they didn’t seem like the person I knew. I never knew she’d been homeless.
I almost didn’t believe they were hers, but I recognized her signature. Surprisingly, it hadn’t changed all that much over the years.
The first dozen or so pages of entries were her thoughts on the probationary period. I skimmed through most of them until I got to her entries of her time at the CGE.
Day one of Phase One
ADG put me in room 427 when I first got here, so I might just make it my lucky nu
mber—even if it is three digits. Do people even have three-digit lucky numbers? Oh well. They do now. Maybe I’ll start a trend.
I’m not sure what I think about the place. It’s too big and too crowded. Demonology is different. Not what I expected. I mean, the whole thing, being here, training to hunt demons (demons!) seems weird. It almost seems fairytaleish, except in a creepy stuck-in-a-movie kind of way. I’m trying to keep an open mind, but I don’t know. I’m no Cinderella and I don’t really believe in fairytales.
We had the same room. Had Greene done that intentionally, or had it been a coincidence? I rolled my eyes. Of course he’d known. Greene didn’t do anything by accident. He’d known exactly where he was putting me.
Our opinions on the CGE seemed so…different. For me, by the time the first week had rolled around, I’d been in love with the place and never wanted to leave. Heck, within an hour I’d been convinced. But she hadn’t been so sure.
Well, to be fair, I’d only read her thoughts on the probationary period and only one day of her actual stay at the CGE. Maybe her opinion changed.
I kept reading.
By the time I made it to the last entry of the first book, my eyes were watering from non-stop yawning.
Day: Graduation
So, today I graduate Phase One. So much has changed from the probationary period to here, and yet…it’s all pretty similar. Wake, eat, study, homework and/or study more, shower, sleep. Repeat as necessary.
We have two months off after this, between classes, for summer vacation. What the heck am I supposed to do for two months? I asked Greene, who took over as Director a while back. I shouldn’t have been surprised when he suggested studying. He says Phase Two is harder, so I’m a bit worried there. It means more studying and harder work. But at the same time, I’m excited. P2s get to try the weapons. They have a sword in the weapons room that I’ve been wanting to try since the second week, but Mr. Elliot refused to let me play with it. I think my choice of words might have something to do with it.
Okay, going to make this short, since nothing’s really happened yet. Just wanted to write something before tonight, since me and the other P1s are going to celebrate by…honestly, I’m not sure. Becca hasn’t told me anything yet which kinda worries me.
Tomorrow, when I write, I’ll officially (or almost officially) be a P2.
I just hope Becca and Roger won’t have gotten me suspended first.
Laughing, I closed the journal and set it aside. I sat up and looked around. I’d been exhausted ten minutes ago and now I was wide awake. I probably should’ve just gone to bed, but I was too wired.
My mom had written about walking around outside in the early mornings, because everything was so dewy and quiet. She ended up liking the bustle of the North Tower too, but she liked watching it come to life.
I jumped up from the bed and tucked the journals in the bottom drawer of my dresser. I know I didn’t have to hide them from anyone—like Greene, since he’d given them to me—but they were private. Personal.
With the journals safely tucked away, I grabbed my ID and headed outside.
It was still shy of six. The sun hadn’t risen yet, so the sky was still midnight blue and I could see Venus—or was it Jupiter? I could never remember which—shining bright in the horizon.
I headed toward the track and then took my time as I circled around.
My mom was right. It really was peaceful, though I still liked being on the catwalk more. An owl hooted somewhere in the distance, making me smile.
The sky had just a hint of pink peeking over the trees as I finished my last lap around the track. By the time I reached the end, I spotted Greene standing near the bleachers.
His eyes met mine and he smiled. “Good morning, Miss Hall.”
Did I have a GPS tracker implanted or something? “Morning.”
“Or is it evening for you still?” When I didn’t answer, he shook his head. “Please tell me you at least got a few hours of sleep.”
I didn’t want to lie, so I kept my mouth shut.
He was still shaking his head. “You stayed up reading your mother’s journals, I take it?”
“Only the first one,” I said with a sheepish smile.
“And what do you think? Did you read about any of her…exploits here?”
“Yeah.” I nodded. “She seemed like a trouble maker.” Between her and her friends—Becca and Roger—it seemed like they were always in trouble. Kind of like me.
Except I wasn’t exactly like them, because I really didn’t try to find trouble. It just found me.
“She was. She was also one of my favorite Prospects. Always in trouble, yet somehow managing to stay on my good side. Of course,” he said, a wry smile crossing his face, “that was when I caught her. She was very skilled at hiding her tracks. I knew she did at least half of the things I accused her of, but I never had any proof.” He gestured to the track. “Care to have a seat with me?”
“Sure.”
“When I learned what happened to her,” he continued, speaking softly as we walked, “I was very saddened. She was no longer working for us, but I had hoped she would return. The day I heard of the attacks, I thought you had all been killed. I didn’t learn differently for almost a week, and when I did…I admit I was hoping you would some day join us. When I found you, I figured if you had half the talent or skill your mother possessed, that I couldn’t be displeased.” He took a seat on the bleachers. “Instead, you’ve surpassed my expectations. You had a bit of a rough start and some trouble, but even so, you rose to the challenge.”
I sat down a few feet away, and silently, I wondered which trouble he was referring to: me getting in trouble with Felecia (multiple times), or my not not-dying-dying-vampirism thing.
“What do you think of her? Your mother as a teenager.”
“We’re not as similar as I thought we’d be, as people said we were.”
“You’re two very different people. It’s not a bad thing.”
“I know.” I looked down at my hands. “I just thought we’d have more in common, maybe. I never thought about her as a teenager. Before you gave me the journals, I mean. But then when you did, I thought we’d think alike.”
“And you don’t believe you are?”
I shook my head, then shrugged. “On some things, yeah, but complete opposite on others.” We both thought Greene knew too much, but where I’d liked the CGE from day one, she hadn’t. “Thanks again for giving them to me.”
“You’re welcome.” He stayed silent for a moment. “You’ve done very well for yourself here, Jade. I hope you realize and believe that. You’re one of the best Prospects the CGE has seen in a long time, as your mother was before you. I know how I feel about your time here, but I want to know how you feel about it.”
“I think you ask that question a lot,” I said before I could stop myself. I winced. “Sorry.”
He smiled. “It’s fine. And you’re right, I do. Nevertheless, I’ve taken a personal interest in your training, and I ask because I’m curious of your answer.”
I didn’t give my answer immediately, or even try to. Sitting quietly, I thought about everything that had happened since I’d joined—the people I’d met, my classes. It wasn’t just a place to stay. It wasn’t just the CGE or somewhere away from Mrs. Gill and the others.
It was…home.
From what I’d heard, some of the other P1s didn’t seem to particularly enjoy living here all that much, but I didn’t mind.
So much had happened in the last few months that, at times, it was hard to believe it’d only been a few months and not a few years. I’d been in fights, almost died, almost been expelled, almost died again, then had an I’m-turning-into-a-vampire scare. And the last few things on that list had been in the same week.
Things here moved…fast, I decided. Like, faster than the speed of light fast.
I met Linc.
My family had moved around a lot, so I’d never really had a best friend before hi
m. I’d never had someone outside of my family that knew me as well as he did. And I wasn’t counting Greene. He cheated at that, somehow. I just hadn’t quite figured out how.
I let out a deep breath. “I still haven’t accomplished what I set out to accomplish.”
“The demon?”
I nodded. “Yeah. That was the main reason I joined.”
“And now? Have your feelings changed any?”
I started to shake my head, to deny that it had, but then I stopped. “Kind of, I guess. I mean, finding the demon is why I’m here, why I joined. But I guess it isn’t the only thing keeping me anymore, if that makes sense.” I thought of Celina and frowned. “I wish I would have been more help to Celina.”
“Jade.” Greene’s voice was soft. “You did help her. She would have died in those streets if you hadn’t acted in her interest. She would have died painfully. Instead, she didn’t die alone, and we were able to make her passing as comfortable as possible.” I wasn’t convinced. He saw right through me and knew it. “Let me ask you this. When you were bitten by the vampire, if, given the choice—even knowing you still might die—would you have wanted something for the pain? Would you have preferred dying alone?”
“No,” I answered immediately. I would have given anything for the pain to stop sooner. I wouldn’t have wanted to be alone, either.
“Then, in my humble opinion, your help was enormous, and I know it was appreciated. You didn’t get to talk to her after the attack, but she was very grateful for what you did. As was her family.”
I scrunched my eyebrows together. “Her family? You said you never found any.”
“I know. We finally managed to track down a sister and a niece. I asked if they would like to meet you, but I’m afraid it would have been too painful for them.” He smiled at me softly. “You did a good thing. You helped. And I believe you can continue to help here—if you want to.”
“I do. I said I do, and I meant it.”
I didn’t want to be anywhere else, even if I had somewhere else to go. The CGE was my home. Learning my mother had been an agent here, and finding her journals, had only cemented those feelings. Before, Greene had said I’d been made for this. Maybe he was right.
Breed of Innocence (The Breed Chronicles, #01) Page 28