Perfect Contradiction

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Perfect Contradiction Page 8

by Peggy Martinez


  “Thank you,” she said again. “I’ll be here tomorrow then?”

  I nodded. “Can’t wait,” I said honestly. She slung her messenger bag across her back and left with a small wave over her shoulder as she pushed through the swingin’ door. I heard her tell someone where they could find “the owner” just before the front door squeaked shut. I need to get those hinges oiled, I thought, adding it to my mental to-do list. I had a lot of things to get done. Christmas was right around the corner. I was gearing up for several different holiday catering gigs, and I hadn’t even had time to put up a tree in the front room of the inn.

  “You need the hinges on your front door oiled,” a deep, masculine voice said.

  “I was just thinking that…” I murmured without looking up from my notebook. I was scribbling as fast as I could. I had just thought of a new recipe and wanted to write down what I’d thought before I forgot. “I’ll be with you in just one sec, hun,” I said to the male voice in the room.

  “Take your time, ma’am,” he said, his deep voice hinting at a grin.

  I finished writing down the inspiration I’d had for a brand-new dump cake, snapping my notebook shut and slipping it into the pocket of my apron before turning a smile up to my guest.

  “I’m sorry about that….” I started. The rest of my words stuck in my throat. A pair of the sexiest eyes I’d ever seen stared twinkling back at me. Blue eyes, the color of a crystal-clear sky set in a tan face with tiny laugh lines at the corner of full lips. The man’s hair was a bit shaggier than I was normally attracted to, but the dark brown waves looked… right on him. He held a black cowboy hat in his hand. I looked him up and down. A cowboy through and through it seemed. Tight fittin’ Levis, a button-up shirt you couldn’t find anywhere but in a western store, and a well-worn pair of black boots. Yee-haw!

  “Can I help you?” I finally blurted out. His smile was slow, sensuous, and just a little crooked. Oh my.

  “I’m hopin’ you can,” he said, his deep voice thrumming through the entire room. “I was told you might have a room available.”

  I nodded and quickly looked away. What was wrong with me? Danged extra hormones flowing through my body. “I do. Would you like to take a look to see if it’s to your likin’?” I asked, meeting his gaze once again. I moved out from behind the case, and his eyes traveled over me from head to foot. A blush had begun. I looked like a house in my maternity jean skirt and plaid, long-sleeved blouse.

  “I’m sure if it’s even half as charmin’ as everything else I’ve seen up to this point, it’ll do me just fine,” he said with a wicked gleam in his eye.

  I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was blushing bright red by then. I decided to blame it on the pregnancy. “Just the same, I’d like to take you up real quick like. I don’t want you to be disappointed.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” he said, following me out of the room.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t get your name,” I said as we stepped onto the second floor.

  “Jackson Sharp,” he said as I opened the door that led into my biggest guest room. Jackson was a big man, and I figured he’d need all the room he could get. He walked into the room and looked around.

  “This is the largest room I have,” I explained as he walked over to touch the homemade blue quilt on the bed. He glanced over at the small shelf and picked up a picture there.

  “This room would suit me well,” he murmured. “Plenty of room and very homey,” he said, setting the picture down. “Family?” he asked, referring to the black-and-white photograph he’d been looking at.

  I walked over and picked it up gently. It was a picture of a woman smiling and kneading dough on a floured tabletop. It was an old picture, but not that old. I just loved it in black and white.

  “That was my mother,” I said softly. She looked so happy in the picture, so carefree and peaceful. No one would’ve known how much she had gone through. She was my hero.

  “I see where you got your beautiful smile,” Jackson said from beside me, pulling me out of my thoughts.

  I laughed lightly. “Why, thank you, Mr. Sharp,” I said with a wink. “She was a beautiful woman inside and out.” I put a hand on my stomach as I walked to the door with a smile on my face.

  “When is the little one due?” he asked casually.

  “March,” I answered over my shoulder. “Not too much longer now.” Jackson smiled and followed me out into the hallway. He sure did take up a lot of room. I glanced over at the bassinet I’d pulled out into the hallway an hour ago, meaning to get someone to carry it down for me. I’d forgotten all about it. I didn’t have anyone else staying in the inn that week. Jackson Sharp would be the only one.

  “I’m sorry about that; the inn is usually pretty clutter free. I meant to drag that downstairs to work on this weekend,” I said with a frown.

  “You’re not going to lift that yourself though, are you?” he asked with a frown. “Your husband will do it surely,” he said.

  I stiffened and looked away from his searching and concerned gaze. “I’m not married, Mr. Sharp,” I said shortly.

  The poor man shuffled next to me, moving his hat from one hand to the other.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you. I’m a big idiot and tend to stick my very large, booted foot down my throat on occasion,” he said gruffly. “Please accept my apology.”

  I waved my hand in his direction. “Don’t worry about it at all. I’m just a little touchy lately,” I offered up weakly. “I know you didn’t mean anything. Would you like to book the room then?” I asked with a smile. Jackson grinned and stuck a hand out. I put my much smaller one in his and shook it.

  “I’d love the room,” he said.

  “Good,” I said with a release of breath. “I’ve got homemade chili for dinner and some cobbler for dessert tonight. Sound good?” I asked from the second stair down. I turned back and found Jackson with his arms full of the baby’s bassinet.

  “Sounds delicious, ma’am,” he said with a grin.

  “Mr. Sharp…”

  He shook his head. “It weighs nothin’ and I won’t rest easy thinking you’ll be lifting it down these stairs, so might as well not argue.” His eyes never left mine. There was no argument to be made there.

  “Alrighty then, but you can stop calling me ma’am and start calling me Jen,” I said in a huff as I kept moving down the stairs. “And you be sure to knock your boots off before you enter the house,” I threw in for good measure.

  “Yes ma’… will do, Jen,” he said. “I’d appreciate it if you’d call me Jackson as well,” he countered.

  I nodded my agreement. “That only seems fair,” I said. Jackson took the bassinet out to the back porch for me and then paid for his room. I got him a key and a fresh set of towels for his room.

  “Dinner will be at six. I didn’t make anything fancy seeing as how the inn is mostly empty this week, but if you need anything, feel free to ask or leave me a note downstairs. I’m usually here, though, so I doubt you’ll have a hard time findin’ me if ya need anything.”

  “Thank you, Jen. I’ll see you at dinner,” he said before heading out of the bakery with a smile playing on his lips.

  I used a bill on the counter to fan my face. It must have been a little warm in the house.

  Jackson Sharp had been stayin’ at the inn for almost a week when I realized how much I was enjoying his company. It was nice to have a guy around. We ate breakfast with each other each morning and dinner with each other each night. Each afternoon, he’d show up just about the time my second wave of bakin’ was finished and carry all my trays out to the bakery case for me. It was useless for me to argue with him. He would just grab a cherry hand pie when he was finished and say the fringe benefits are well worth it with a cocky grin and a wink.

  “I don’t know,” I said as I rubbed my hands together to keep them warm.

  “It’s pretty big,” Rachael said.

  I nodded. It was huge.

  “You
said to get a nice tree.” Jackson waved a hand to the ginormous tree with a grin. “So, I got a nice tree.”

  “I don’t think it’ll fit,” I said seriously.

  Jackson scoffed and motioned for Rachael and me to get out of the way.

  “Watch and learn, darlin’,” he answered. I shook my head. Men were so stubborn. Jackson got the tree inside, situating near the piano and the front window. Rachael helped him hold it steady as he got it secured in place. Both of them wouldn’t let me even think about helping. I rolled my eyes and stood back, itching to do something.

  Once the tree was just perfect, according to Jackson and Rachael, we all went over to the other side of the room to see how it looked. I turned my head just enough to catch a glimpse of Jackson’s smile. Oh lordy, I was going to have to say it. I sighed and crossed my arms over my stomach.

  “Alright. You were right, Jackson Sharp. It’s perfect,” I admitted. Rachael was giggling, and Jackson had the good sense not to rub it in.

  “So, can we start decorating it?” Rachael asked. I smiled over at her and nodded. She squealed and ran to get the boxes we’d brought out of storage earlier in the day.

  “She is very excited to decorate that tree,” Jackson commented.

  I snorted.

  He glanced over with a questioning look. “What?” he asked. “What did I miss?”

  I smiled and walked over to sit down on the sofa where we’d put a huge container of popcorn to be strung for the tree. Jackson followed me and sat down. I shrugged.

  “If you think Rachael is excited about stringin’ popcorn and decorating that tree, you’ve got no clue,” I said as I began pushing popcorn kernels onto my needle and thread. Jackson picked up his own threaded needle and set to work as well. Stringing popcorn for that big a tree was going to take some time.

  “So, clue me in,” Jackson said near my shoulder. I stiffened just a little at his nearness. Jackson Sharp was all man and completely overwhelming sometimes. Sad truth was that he had no idea.

  “You,” I answered with a tiny shrug, not meeting his eyes.

  “Me?” he asked. “You gotta give me more than that, darlin’,” he said gruffly.

  I sighed. “She’s got a crush on you,” I said plainly. Jackson didn’t say anything for a few seconds. I stopped what I was doing and glanced over at him. He looked astonished. I laughed and slapped his knee.

  “She’s a kid,” he said in horror.

  I rolled my eyes. Truly clueless. She’s a teenager. Too young for you, but just old enough to wish she wasn’t,” I said softly. “And don’t you dare act weird around her. She’s a good kid and she’ll be a good woman one day, best not to crush her hopes,” I said seriously, but with a hint of mischief. Jackson had made himself an easy target.

  “Oh, I wouldn’t dare,” he said quickly. “I wouldn’t want to fall out of favor with the lady of the inn,” he added softly.

  Heat rose to my cheeks but I batted his words away. He was playing around. No one could be serious about a woman huge and pregnant with another man’s baby. At least, I didn’t think they could. Rachael came bouncing back into the room before I could give it much more thought. For that, I was grateful.

  “So, how about we watch a Christmas movie while we decorate the tree?” I suggested. “I have a stack of movies we can choose from.” Jackson and Rachael both seemed to think it was a great idea, so I got out my holiday movie collection and sat it on the table for them to choose from. I kept stringing popcorn while they laughed over each other’s choices and reenacted scenes from the ones they each had dubbed the “best Christmas movie ever”. I brought out egg nog and the special Christmas cookies I’d made for everyone, and we all settled on A Christmas Story as the movie of the night.

  After a lovely evening of decorating, movies, and good conversation with friends, I sat back with a mug of hot cocoa and another gingerbread cookie. I sighed happily as I looked at the tree. It was trimmed in colored lights, silver bells with bows, strung with popcorn, and had a variety of bulbs and ornaments my mother had gathered over a lot of years. Tons of that messy, silver tinsel hung from the tree as well. A tree wasn’t complete without that stuff. A pretty, twinkling white star topped it. I smiled when I remembered Rachael trying to tell Jackson where to move it to make it “perfect”. I’d laughed so hard I’d almost wet myself. It had been a wonderful time. Now Rachael had gone home, Jackson went to pick up some stuff he needed in town, and I was there just enjoying the view of my Christmas tree.

  Rachael was going to be an amazing young woman when she realized how beautiful and smart she was and how much she had to offer the world.

  Jackson was going to make some woman very lucky one day.

  And I… I was content.

  It only took about three weeks after I showed up at church in my most baby bump-revealing maternity dress before something I’d been dreading actually happened. I knew it was just a matter of time, but once nothing happened after the first two weeks, I kinda got my hopes up. But sure enough, after three weeks post-church reveal and about ten days after Jackson Sharp had been stayin’ at the inn… it happened.

  “I hope I’m not upsetting you,” McKenna said, biting her lip. The picture of innocence. “I just thought you should know. I’d want to know if it pertained to me,” she added in for good measure. I clenched my jaw and then took a second before I answered. I was putting away all my classroom supplies right after Sunday school class. The kids had been making macaroni art to take home with them. Ironically enough, they covered a large “P” for patience.

  “Of course, McKenna,” I said after a moment. “Thanks for telling me. I appreciate it.” Pasting a huge smile on my face, I continued cleaning up the room. I glanced back over to where I left her standing. She hadn’t gone anywhere. She was hoping I had something to say out of anger or spite or whatever, but I wasn’t about to give her more gossip and hatefulness to spread around.

  “You should head on over to the main building,” I said sweetly. “I’d hate for you to be late. I still have some cleaning up to do here before I can join you.” Without waiting for a reply, I strode off into the supply closet with my elbow macaroni, glitter, and glue bottles. When I came back out, McKenna was gone. Thank God.

  I sank down into a kiddie chair and took my time getting a hold of my emotions. So, some of the mothers were talking about how they didn’t think it was right or moral that an unmarried, pregnant woman was teaching their children’s Sunday school class? That someone who was a godly and good example for their children should be doing the job. Ouch. It hurt a little more than I expected it to, even though I had expected it. I wasn’t sure even Beth had thought something like this would happen… but I had. I’d prepared for it even. Still… it stung.

  I heaved myself out of the kiddie chair—that had been a mistake—and grabbed my bag and purse off the desk near the door. Turning out the lights, I turned to look over the classroom. I loved my time with the class twice a month, but I’d already planned how I’d react weeks back. Walking slowly back to the main building, I sat in the back pew of the church. The mom of one of my kids sat two rows ahead of me. She saw me sit down and turned around quickly to whisper something in her sister’s ear. Both of them had kids in my class. I snorted under my breath. As if. Shelly Yancey had her little boy five months after her own shotgun wedding, but you didn’t see me refusing to teach her kid or gossiping about that during services. I had no doubt they were some of the pot-stirrers, but it didn’t matter one bit. If parents at the church didn’t think I was fit to teach their kids, then that was that. Who was I to argue?

  The services seemed to drag by intolerably slow. When they were over, I hung around until most of the church had emptied out before asking to speak with Pastor Wright.

  “What can I do for you, Jennifer?” Pastor Wright asked from behind his large desk. I smiled at him. He was a good man and a great pastor.

  “I’m afraid I’m going to have to give up my Sunday school class,”
I said.

  Pastor Wright sat forward, seemingly shocked. His eyes widened though, and I knew what he was thinking immediately. He would have let me step down if he thought I was being bullied or because people were gossiping. He was a very good man. I didn’t give him a chance to ask me any questions though.

  “It’s just that with the inn, I’ve got a lot on my plate,” I started. “I’ve been working almost every day, including Sunday evenings, just to keep caught up. Even with hiring part-time help, I’ve got a lot going on.”

  Pastor Wright sat back in his chair. “Are you sure that’s it?” he asked, watching me closely. “I know you love teaching those kids, and I must say… you’re one of our best teachers. The kids adore you, and they learn a lot when they love a teacher like that.”

  I smiled. I did love those little terrors. “I’m sure… well, besides the obvious, I mean,” I said, patting my stomach.

  “Yes, I imagine that keeps you even more tired,” he said carefully. “You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

  I nodded. I actually did know that.

  “And if it’s something you don’t feel comfortable talking to me about, Mrs. Wright is always available. Night or day.”

  I nodded again, feeling a little more emotional than I was comfortable with right then. “Thank you, Pastor,” I mumbled softly.

  “We feel as though you’re a member of our family, Jen,” he said gently. “Take advantage whenever you feel the need, just like all our other kids,” he said with a smile.

  I snorted. “I’ll remember that,” I said with a sniffle as I stood.

  “See that you do,” he answered.

  I left the church sad that I wouldn’t be teaching twice a month any longer, but kind of glad to get it over with. There was nothing else anyone could take from me, nothing else anyone could do or say to make me feel bad about who I was or my baby. I kind of felt… relief. It didn’t last long though.

  By the time I got home, I was seething again.

  Freaking jerks had no right to judge me! I thought. Where was their Christmas spirit? Evidently nowhere in sight even with Christmas only ten days away. I hoped they all got coal in their stockings.

 

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