“I was marrying her for her background,” he admitted with a sheepish look in her direction.
Her relief faded. “Then you will be disappointed in any union we make, no matter what pretty words you say to deny it.”
“No!”
She cut him off with a shake of her head. “Yes. Can you honestly tell me you aren’t desperate to create a certain image?”
Noah drew back in surprise. Here she’d touched on the very fact that had been plaguing him for months. Yet if he demanded honesty from her, there was no way he could be a hypocrite and give her less.
“You’re right.”
Her face fell with distress at his short answer. For a moment she didn’t speak, but finally raised her gaze back to his. Her face was full of sadness and loss and other things he couldn’t identify.
“Whose image are you trying to recreate, Noah?”
“My father’s.” He was surprised at how quickly he answered her. This wasn’t a subject he’d discussed even with his family, yet he easily revealed the truth to a woman he hadn’t even known a month before.
Marion’s face softened. “What was he like?”
A knot formed in Noah’s throat at her question. He tried not to think of his father in terms of a person, just a goal he had to reach. When he dared to think of the flesh and blood man, it invariably hurt him to his very core.
“His name was James. He was actually a second son, but when his older brother died, my father took over the title.” He glanced down at his fisted hands. “And did more with it than even he would have wagered in the beginning. He had studied shipping and trade and in two years time he doubled the wealth of Woodbury. He instituted changes in how business was done with our tenants and our servants. He made them partners in our successes as well as the shire’s woes. He even learned their names and found out at least one personal thing about them so he always had a connection.”
Marion tilted her head with a small smile. “But what was he like, Noah?”
“He was…” Noah shook his head as he searched for the right words. “Everything. He loved with all his heart. He worshipped my mother, did all he could to protect my sisters, no matter how misguided that protection might have been. He taught me to be a man, not just a lord of a manor.”
“You loved him.” Marion’s eyes grew distant and pained. “You’re lucky you were so close to him.”
For the first time since he’d come to sit beside her, Noah touched her. Heat rushed through him even though he only brushed her hand. She jumped at the caress, but didn’t move her fingertips from beneath his.
“I was lucky. But I took him and his lessons for granted.” His heart sank. “Though he never said it, in the end, I let him down.”
Marion looked at the man who now sat with his fingers laced with hers as if they’d been together for years, not weeks. His normally jovial exterior was gone, replaced by the true emotional pain of a man who craved to live up to a dead man. Yet, in her eyes, Noah was already everything anyone could possibly admire.
“Why would he ever have been disappointed in you as a son?” She squeezed his fingertips. “You worked to protect your country while he lived. And since he’s been gone, you’ve driven yourself to meet some expectation that perhaps he never had.”
His brow wrinkled in consideration, but he still didn’t look convinced. “I chose the path of a rake, Marion. A path he never looked down, let alone traveled.”
“Why did you?”
He shrugged one shoulder. “I was young. I liked the pleasures of the world.” His gaze came up to hers with heat. “Of the flesh.”
She drew in a short breath at the desire in his eyes, but kept herself focused on their conversation. Noah wouldn’t distract her from it with amorous diversions.
“Many men choose that path and eventually come back to one more admirable. But from what I’ve seen in you, Noah, you’ve never been dishonorable. If you played, it was for a purpose. You may have gleaned some pleasure from it, yes, but you also used that reputation to help your country.”
For the second time, Noah was stunned and touched by the observations of the woman beside him. How did she know what he needed to hear? How did she see exactly how to ease the ache in his heart?
He lifted her hand to his lips to place a soft kiss along her knuckles. A visible shiver moved through her at the action and some of his tenderness turned to lust at her responsiveness.
“I’m sure your father was proud of you, Noah.”
“Perhaps.” At the reminder of his father and his choices, his lust faded. “But when he died, I realized I’d have to give that life up in order to be a good Marquis. In order to be a good man, I must become more like him.”
She withdrew her hand from his to touch his face. “Noah, what’s wrong with just being you? Being who you are and leading your shire in your own way? No man can take another’s path.”
“You don’t understand what it’s like to live up to someone else’s image.” The oppressive weight of desperation pressed on his heart. “Especially someone who was so good.”
Her eyes saddened. “But you shouldn’t have to. You may believe you’re still some kind of rogue, but you aren’t. By the way you’ve treated me alone, I know you’ve never been anything but a good man. And you’ll never be anything else. Perhaps you aren’t an exact replica of your father, but you are… perfect.”
Marion looked up into the eyes of the man she loved and saw a vulnerability there she wouldn’t have believed existed even a few hours before. Not when he’d stared at her with the steely resolution of a man not to be questioned and told her he would marry her.
She never would have guessed how driven she would find herself to take his pain away. Inching closer, she flattened her palms against his chest, then slid them up to wrap around his neck. His breath came shorter, warming her face as she leaned up to press her lips against his.
For a moment the kiss was only giving, the gentle healing of a friend to another. But then giving turned to possessing as she parted her lips. Noah’s hands came around to grasp her waist and she found herself pressed against him, her blood rushing hot and fast in her veins as she tangled her fingers into his hair.
Noah smiled against her lips, and she felt the tension ease from his body. “Do you remember how good I made you feel last night? Before your father burst in?”
Blood rushed to Marion’s face at his reminder of their intimate moments together. She’d been able to think of little else since her whole world had exploded in a dazzling, pleasurable flame. He’d kissed her in the most intimate way possible, had brought her to the edge of a place she’d never dreamed existed, then promptly taken her over the edge. And she craved more.
“Ye-yes,” she whispered, darting her tongue along his lower lip and reveling in the taste of his skin.
“If we were married, I’d make you feel that good every night. Better,” he promised in a low growl that warmed her blood.
“Better?”
His answer was to deepen the kiss, drawing her closer to him until she could feel every inch of him against her. He feathered kisses along her jaw, down her throat until she burned and every nerve crackled with awareness and desire. Yet there was still a niggling doubt in her mind. He’d obviously shared these kinds of pleasures with many other women. Eventually he’d tired of every one of them. If this were all they shared, he would tire of her, too.
With desire still pulsing through her, she whispered, “I have no choice, do I?”
His mouth stilled on her throat and she felt the tension return to the muscles in his shoulders. With a frown, he pulled back.
“No.”
Noah watched her face closely, waiting for her anger. Waiting for her to return to arguing with him about the need for such a drastic step. Instead, the desire in her eyes was replaced by defeat. Her shoulders rolled forward as she slowly shook her head.
“I’ll do this without fighting you any longer. But I’d like for you to do someth
ing for me as well.”
Disappointment coursed hard through his veins. She still felt she had to bargain with him. That would be the first thing he’d teach her as his wife. She didn’t need to trade to get what she wanted. If she asked, he’d do his best to give her whatever she requested.
His eyes drifted over the curves that had been pressed against him so intimately not a few moments before. Well, perhaps not the first thing he’d teach her.
The corner of his mouth quirked into a smile. “Yes?”
“I want to retain Sally as my maid. She did her best to assist me while I was at Toppleton Square and asked that I help her get out of Lucas’s employ in return.”
He narrowed his eyes. Though Marion viewed Sally as a friend, he had to wonder if the woman’s motives were so pure. Obviously she was using Marion, if only to get away from Lucas. It was something he couldn’t completely blame her for. But he still had to wonder at the maid’s swift surrender of information.
“I’ll do that for you, if it’s what you desire,” he said slowly. There would be time for investigation and argument later. For now, giving her what she wanted seemed best. “We’ll make a happy life, Marion.”
Her expression was incredulous. “Happy or not, Noah, a prison is still a prison.”
Again, pain shot through him with a power that was frightening. “And that’s what you see life with me as being.”
Marion could sense his anger, but pressed on. He’d already said he wanted honesty. Even if it hurt, or made him furious, she could do no less. Especially if they were to be married.
“As much as I…” Was she going to admit she loved him? No. Not now. Not when he had an angry fire in his eyes that told her how frustrated he was with her continued resistance. “As much as I care for you, this isn’t what either of us wants. Not this way. Eventually I fear you’ll resent me.”
His eyes met hers with a spark of denial and fury. She continued speaking to prevent the interruption she knew was coming.
“You’ll resent me for what’s happened,” she said with her voice trembling. “You’ll begin to reinvent our history until you’ll remember me, a country chit, trapping you, a Marquis, into marriage.”
He opened his mouth with an outraged growl. “I’m sorry you feel that way, Marion. Unfortunately circumstances have left neither of us with a choice. Resentful or not, you will marry me. Get used to it.”
With that, he abruptly stood and walked away, leaving Marion to stare at his rigid back as he crossed the lawn toward the house.
Chapter Twenty-One
Noah heard Marion call his name as he strode away from her across the lawn, but didn’t stop. He didn’t even glance over his shoulder, though his heart and body screamed at him to look at her. He already knew what he’d see. Not a woman happy to be his forever, but one torn apart by her lack of choices.
It infuriated him. But why was he so damn angry? Her analysis was perfectly correct. This wasn’t what either of them had planned for or wanted, but having her put those feelings so plainly hurt.
What did he want anyway? A blushing bride totally in love with him? He had never planned on that when he intended to offer for Charlotte.
But he hadn’t wanted love with Charlotte.
“Damn it,” he barked to no one in particular.
“Sir?” Basil looked up as Noah stormed into the house and slammed the door behind him.
“Ready the household to depart for London tomorrow,” he called over his shoulder as he continued down the hall in long, purposeful strides.
At least in London he wouldn’t have to share a roof with Marion. Perhaps that distance would clear his head and make him remember his place, not the need for her that coursed through him like a constant drumbeat.
***
Marion twisted her gloves in her hand as she returned to the house and closed the door behind her. Her head was spinning from the encounter with Noah nearly an hour ago. He had aroused her, angered her and confused her with his reaction to her reticence to marry. Along with the fact that he’d refused to turn back when she called his name.
That had stung the worst. How she’d wanted him to return and allow her to explain that her feelings confused her, but that she would try her hardest to make a marriage between them work because she loved him and wanted to make him proud. But he’d not turned back, and she’d been too much of a coward to follow him.
No, she sat like a ninny and watched. And contemplated how ridiculous the entire situation had become.
“Would you like some tea, miss?”
Marion cleared her thoughts with a shake of her head and smiled at Mrs. York who had appeared from the dining room with a gentle smile for her guest.
“No, Mrs. York. I think I’m going to go up to my room to rest for a little while. My arm is still quite tender and I’m tired.” Through her sadness she found a weak smile for the housekeeper.
“To your chambers, miss?” Mrs. York’s eyes widened a fraction.
“Yes. I’ll be down in time for supper though.”
With a nod for the older woman, she climbed the stairs to her room. To her surprise, her chamber door was open and two maids were inside going through the closet where Audrey’s old gowns still hung.
“These two will do for a while,” whispered the blonde to the red head. “She’ll have more made when she arrives, so it won’t make no difference anyway.”
“Excuse me.” Marion took two steps into the room.
The pair spun around to look at her with polite smiles. “Oh, hello Miss.” The blonde draped the gown in her hand over one arm. “Did you need to use the room, then? Lord Woodbury told us to finish up in the other rooms if you needed the chamber.”
“Finish up what?” Marion surveyed a small trunk on the floor beside the armoire. Certainly Audrey Berenger wouldn’t have asked for her out-of-date gowns now that she was a countess.
The redhead gave her a patient smile. “The packing, miss. You and the master and Lady Woodbury will be leaving for London tomorrow morning at first light.”
Marion’s mouth dropped open. Noah hadn’t mentioned anything about a move to London. “I beg your pardon?”
“Very last minute arrangements miss.” The redhead nodded, but her eyes widened with interest as she realized Marion hadn’t been informed of the plans. “But we can scurry away if you’d like to rest.”
Marion’s eyes narrowed. “No. But can you tell me where his lordship is? I have a few things to discuss with him.”
“His lordship has gone for a long ride, at my order.”
Marion spun around. Lady Woodbury stood in the doorway with her arms crossed, staring at her. “And I think you’d better calm your nerves, as well, before you speak to him again.”
“My lady…” Marion’s embarrassment filled her and she trailed off in utter misery.
“Come with me. If you aren’t too tired, perhaps we can share a cup of tea in my private salon down the hall.”
The older woman beckoned to Marion as she strolled from the doorway and down the hall. At her cloaked order, Marion hurried to keep up.
Tea was already laid out on a service in the salon. It was a small room but elegant and befitting the woman before her. The interior was done in soft shades of blue and green with comfortable furniture spread about.
“Sit.” Lady Woodbury motioned to the chair opposite her as she sat down in the other. “I’ll pour.”
With a nod, Marion did as she was asked and stared with trepidation at the woman who would soon be her mother-in-law. Though Tabitha Jordan’s eyes were kind when they met hers, it was also obvious the older woman had much to say on the subject of Marion’s upcoming wedding, and her conduct so far. She had a feeling not all of those sentiments would be joyful or approving.
Once the tea had been poured and scones put on plates, Tabitha leaned back in her chair and gave Marion a long, appraising glance.
“You are very upset about this entire arrangement, aren’t you?” Tabitha ask
ed before she took a long sip from her cup.
Marion hesitated. The last thing she wanted to do was offend Lady Woodbury, but she didn’t want to lie, either. “My reticence isn’t a slight on your family, I assure you. I simply never intended to marry… not this way.”
“Of course you didn’t. What woman would?” Tabitha’s understanding smile fell. “But this choice is what you and Noah created for yourselves. I’d hate to see you destroy any chance you have at happiness before you even start.”
“You must allow me some period of adjustment.” Marion set her teacup down.
“Of course. But you must also admit that you had a hand in creating this situation.” Tabitha’s eyes narrowed. “After all, you made a bargain with my son that wasn’t appropriate. That it didn’t go as you planned is as much your own fault as it is his. I do place added blame on him as the more experienced of the two of you.”
Marion threw her hands in the air. “You don’t understand my situation. What I would have been forced to… do if I didn’t find an alternative.”
Tabitha arched an eyebrow. “Of course I understand. You were facing a life with Josiah Lucas, and worse, a very uncouth entry into the physical aspects of marriage. And now I’ve found out Mr. Lucas may even be suspect in his late wife’s death, so I can see why you were desperate.” She leaned closer. “But none of those things make you any less responsible for your own actions.”
“Of course not.” Marion shook her head. She was willing to take some of the blame for what had happened. “But I still believe there must be another way for us to resolve this situation beyond dragging me to London for a forced marriage.”
One of Tabitha’s eyebrows arched up in warning. “No. You’ve compromised yourself, and you’ll continue to be until you are no longer under Noah’s roof.”
“But you’re my chaperone here.”
“The damage is already done.” Tabitha shook her head at Marion’s continued arguments. “Noah is right to take you to London. There you can stay with Lord and Lady Berenger, my daughter Audrey and her husband Griffin. Audrey and I can introduce you into Society for a month or so until the scandal begins to fades. Your marriage to Noah will erase it completely.”
The Temptation of a Gentleman (The Jordans) Page 19