‘Yes. My name’s Alison.’
‘Okay, Alison, can I get you to move a bit so I can reach John? There are some tests I have to do.’ She noted the smell of alcohol on John’s breath as she pushed up his jersey and undid his shirt. How could anyone even think about clambering onto a slippery roof after having had alcohol? But all she said was, ‘John, I’m going to take your pulse and heart rate.’
‘Pulse is weak, Glasgow coma scale is ten,’ Nikki soon told Fraser, meaning that John was responding moderately well to their questions with speech and eye contact, and was reacting to pain by withdrawing from any stimuli. ‘Mild hypothermia, too.’
‘Not surprising. It’s freezing out here,’ Fraser acknowledged. ‘Fractured lower leg. Possibly tib and fib.’
As Fraser gently worked his hands down John’s left leg his patient cried out and then swore. ‘Sorry,’ John muttered a minute later. ‘I didn’t mean to curse you. It’s just that it’s bloody painful.’
Nikki unzipped her drugs bag. ‘Let’s give you some morphine for starters. That’ll help ease the pain.’ The defibrillator printed out some figures. ‘Blood pressure mildly elevated. Oxygen saturation still at eighty-five per cent.’
When they’d got the plastic collar around John’s neck Fraser hunkered down where he could be seen by John without him having to move at all. ‘We’re going splint your lower leg to prevent movement when we slide you onto a board. Even with the morphine it’s going to hurt a bit, I’m afraid. If the pain’s too bad tell us and we’ll give you a suck on the Entonox.’
‘What’s Entonox?’ Mary asked.
‘Laughing gas.’ Fraser was handling the situation perfectly.
Nikki’s mouth dried. He was so good at anything he set his mind to. Even at shutting her out. That hurt. A lot. Now that she’d got past the shock of him having cancer, other emotions were taking over.
Disbelief that she hadn’t sensed something was so wrong, hadn’t noticed he hadn’t been well. Could all the excitement and preparations of the wedding have dominated her mind so much she hadn’t been taking any notice of the man she was supposed to marry?
Resentment and anger at not being trusted with Fraser’s own fear, at not being allowed to support him or make decisions with him about their future.
‘On the count of three.’ Fraser nudged her attention back to their patient.
With John sucking gas, they carefully rolled him onto his right side and slid the board as far under him as possible, then rolled him onto his back and gently but firmly tugged him into the centre.
Fraser placed everyone at a corner of the board. ‘On the count of three we’ll lift and move John to the stretcher. One, two, three.’
Alison stumbled as she took the weight of her corner. John squealed with agony, and his wife looked ready to cry. ‘Oh, John, I’m so sorry. This is awful. I can’t do it.’
‘You’re doing fine,’ Fraser placated her. ‘Keep coming this way, small, steady steps. That’s it. Okay, everyone, put the board on the stretcher.’
Quickly, Nikki attached the straps to keep John stable while Fraser placed the defibrillator at the end of the stretcher. When he began wheeling the stretcher towards the back of the ambulance, Nikki collected up the pack and drugs bag.
‘Can I go with John in the ambulance?’ Alison asked hesitantly. ‘I don’t want him to be on his own.’
‘Of course you can.’ Nikki touched the worried woman lightly on her shoulder. ‘You’ll have to sit up the front with me so Fraser’s got room to move as he keeps monitoring John on the way.’
‘Think I’d prefer that. Seeing those machines and cords and things makes me queasy.’ Alison climbed aboard and snapped her seat belt in place.
Nikki shut the back doors and squeezed through the middle, pushing past Fraser as she headed for the front. Through gritted teeth she asked, ‘Are you ready to go?’
‘As John’s not critical I’ll do another set of obs first.’ Fraser glanced at her, a query in his eyes.
‘Easier while we’re stationary,’ Nikki agreed. ‘I’ll call ED to let them know our ETA and what we’ve got.’
Waiting for ED to come back to her, she again contemplated Fraser as he worked hard to keep his patient comfortable and his condition from deteriorating. He knew his stuff. He’d have been a brilliant doctor. It came through in everything he did with their patients. He had an almost instinctive feel for their needs, emotionally and physically. He should never have quit his training.
It was blindingly obvious now why he had. Because of the cancer. But why hadn’t he returned to university after his treatment? They’d have given him leave for that, even for a whole year, if he’d wanted it. More questions. Would she ever have all the answers?
Fraser filled the kettle. ‘Want a coffee, Nikki?’
No reply.
He glanced around the staffroom and sighed. Not here. Again. Nikki would be upstairs in one of the bedrooms allocated for night crews. Giving him the cold shoulder.
Yep, that’s exactly what she was doing, had been doing since he’d been round to her flat to explain and apologise two days ago. Last night and so far tonight all she’d talked to him about had been work and then only when he’d asked her something.
Had he expected anything else? He’d hurt her so much, why should she roll over the moment he explained his actions? She believed he should’ve told her everything five years ago. He still hadn’t told her everything. Hell. He’d been protecting her from having to make impossible decisions. He’d been looking out for himself as well, not wanting her to stay with him out of pity. Not when he’d loved her so much. He’d done a brilliant job of turning her against him, and there was no way of undoing the damage.
What if he told her the rest? Would she go easy on him then?
The kettle clicked off, the small sound loud in the empty room. Reaching for a mug, he shovelled in coffee granules and two spoonfuls of sugar. His sweet tooth had got sweeter over the years.
‘Hey, Fraser, make a couple more of those while you’re at it, will you?’ Chloe bounced into the room, bringing with her a blast of cold outside air. ‘It’s freezing out there. There’ll be ice on the bridges tonight.’
‘We’ve already picked up a woman who skidded near the river.’
Chloe grinned. ‘At least our call was an inside job, a wee kiddie having an asthma attack.’
Chloe’s crew partner, Ryan, strolled in, rubbing his hands. ‘Good, I can smell coffee.’ He glanced around. ‘Where’s Nikki?’
‘Upstairs, I guess.’ Fraser stirred the drinks ferociously. Last night whenever they hadn’t been out in the ambulance Nikki had been holed up in a bedroom, the door firmly shut.
‘Again?’ Ryan frowned. ‘Is she working on her university papers?’
How would he know? ‘I didn’t know she was studying anything.’ Fraser handed around the drinks. He didn’t know much at all about Nikki these days. And whose fault was that?
‘She’s doing a commerce degree.’ Ryan flicked the TV on. ‘Seems a waste to me when she can make food like this.’ He held up a piece of lemon coconut slice he’d taken from a cake tin on the table. Damn it. Fraser punched the switch on the kettle and grabbed another mug. He couldn’t stand this silence from her. They owed each other more than that.
Nikki clicked on her email folder. Hopefully there’d be something from her tutor at the extramural university regarding her last submission.
Knock, knock. ‘Nikki, I’ve got you a coffee.’
Fraser. Didn’t he get it? She didn’t want to talk to him.
‘Nikki, can I come in?’
No. Go away. Leave me to digest my emotions without taking them out on you. But he wouldn’t. He could be the most stubborn person when he wanted something. Best get it over with. Pushing off the bed, she opened the door wide enough to take the mug Fraser held out to her. ‘Thanks.’
He put his foot in the opening. ‘Nik, talk to me. Please.’
‘Talk to you?’ She
stared at him. The anger she’d been trying to suppress welled up, making her voice rise, her hand shake so that coffee spilled over her fingers. ‘Talk to you. That’s rich.’
Fraser stepped forward, effectively forcing her back into the room. As she sat down on the only chair available he closed the door and leaned back against it. ‘You’re right. I’ve got a hell of a nerve asking you to share your feelings with me. But we have to get on. It’s a bizarre twist of fate that we’re both here working side by side, but I’m not leaving. This is what I do, just like you.’
Not what she’d expected. But her anger didn’t lessen. ‘I’m trying to get my head around it all.’
‘I can understand that. It took me weeks.’
‘I’m not talking about the cancer, though …’ She paused, calmed down a notch, put her mug on the floor. ‘That’s bad enough. No, what really gets me is that you didn’t tell me a thing. Not even when you phoned and told me to call off the wedding. You gave no reason why you didn’t want me any more.’
‘I always wanted you, Nik.’
‘How was I to know that? I’m not psychic.’ The words gathered, spewed out. Selfish words coloured with the hurt, bewilderment and humiliation she’d carried for a long time after he’d gone. And she’d thought she’d got past most of this. Who had she been fooling?
‘Did it ever occur to you that by telling me about the cancer you’d have saved me years of grief, of wondering if you’d found someone else better-looking, or more exciting in the sack or on your level of intelligence? Did you even have the tiniest clue how I might cope with your shock withdrawal from what I believed to be a mutual relationship?’
Fraser reached for her hand.
She swatted him away, picked up the mug again to wrap her shaking hands around it. Tears streamed down her face. ‘The truth would’ve hurt but at least I’d have known. You made decisions for both of us, and that’s the hardest part to understand. Why couldn’t you tell me something so important? Not even the possibility of never having children excuses that.’
Fraser crossed to the bed, sat down. Placed a box of tissues beside her. Picked at the cuff of his jersey. Opened his mouth, closed it again.
She watched him closely, trying to read on his face, in his eyes what he obviously couldn’t say to her. Then told him, ‘I don’t know that I’ll ever again trust anyone not to do that to me.’
Fraser again reached for her hands, and this time she didn’t pull away, hoping the contact would help him tell her what was on his mind.
But he moved his head from side to side. ‘I’m just so damned sorry I hurt you. I really am.’ He tugged free and stood up. ‘I’d better let you get back to whatever you were doing when I barged in.’
Nikki stared at him, disappointment squeezing her. ‘You’re still doing it. Keeping things from me.’ Suddenly she wanted him to know a little more about what she’d been doing in the years they’d been apart. It might help bring them back on an even keel so that at least they could work together smoothly. It might eventually help Fraser talk to her.
‘I’m doing a commerce degree. I’ve got this idea of having my own baking business some time so thought I might as well be prepared for that eventuality.’ She gave him a small smile. ‘Actually, it’s kind of fun, studying. And keeps me off the streets and out of the shops, where I tend to spend too much.’
‘I don’t remember you being keen on shopping.’ He stood near the door, looking genuinely puzzled.
For the first time since he’d arrived back in her life Nikki laughed. ‘Oh, boy. You have no idea. Ever since I lost weight I’ve discovered clothes. And shoes.’
‘Guess we didn’t have a lot of spare cash when we were living together.’
No, she’d been the breadwinner once she’d completed her chef course. And bread had been about it some days, her wages having been minimal. At least now, since her inheritance from her grandmother, she had more than enough money to indulge her passions. Passions. Cooking still ranked number one, and there was money set aside for the shop she dreamed about.
‘So you do want to go back to being a chef one day?’
‘When scraping people off roads or picking them up from floors gets too much for me I’ll think about it. Some nights after particularly ghastly jobs I want out, but I usually manage to work through that. One day, though, I’ll know it’s time to move on.’ Hesitating, she nibbled her top lip, then dived in. ‘Was your decision to quit medicine tied up with having cancer?’
Surprisingly the tension in his shoulders disappeared and he answered easily. ‘Yes. Suddenly faced with the knowledge I mightn’t live for ever, I couldn’t see the point in spending the next years tied down studying.’
She lifted her eyebrows in acknowledgment. ‘That’s understandable. But going into the ambulance service instead must’ve been difficult after giving up your ambition. You must think you could do so much more as a doctor.’
‘Sometimes.’ He looked wistful.
‘Did you join immediately after your treatment?’
‘No. I went travelling with a couple of mates. Do you remember Kevin and Nigel? They always dropped in as you were making dinner.’ When she nodded, he continued, ‘The three of us went to Europe, Asia, South America. Had a blast for nearly two years. Worked when the cash ran out, then carried on travelling. I joined the service when I got back to Dunedin. Having done four years’ medical study I was fast-tracked through the system and given a permanent job straight away.’
His face was animated, the stress lines ironed out for a few moments. His usually tight mouth lifted in a smile. Those missing years obviously held some great memories for him as well as the bad ones.
‘You don’t ever think about going back and completing your degree?’
Snap. The smile was gone, the lines were back. ‘No.’
Nikki watched Fraser turn and leave the room, his shoulders taut again, his tread heavy on the stairs. Why did she get the impression he was being untruthful?
CHAPTER FIVE
‘AHH,’ sixty-five-year-old Jeremy Day moaned, kicking out at the bottom of the bed. His elbow connected with Nikki’s arm just as she was about to stab his thumb with a sharp.
Ouch. ‘Mr Day, please lie still so I can get a drop of blood.’ She held back her exasperation, knowing that the man probably couldn’t help his attitude right now. A known diabetic, his behaviour suggested his glucose level would be very low, which could be confirmed if they could get a blood sample to test it.
‘Hey, Jeremy.’ Fraser put a restraining hand on the man’s shoulder. ‘Take it easy, mate. We’re trying to help you.’
The woman in the doorway cried, ‘Jeremy, do what they say.’
Nikki asked her, ‘How long’s your husband been like this?’
‘I don’t know. He was asleep when I left to do the shopping at nine this morning. When I got home half an hour ago I found him acting funny.’
A three-hour gap. ‘Do you know if he had any breakfast? Or lunch?’
‘I left food on the bench but he hasn’t touched it.’ Mrs Day stared at her husband, despair and love all mixed up on her expression. ‘He’s so stubborn at times.’
Snap. The sharp pressed into the ball of Jeremy’s thumb and a drop of blood oozed out. Nikki quickly used the filter paper to suck up the sample and sighed with relief as she waited for the glucometer to read the blood-sugar level. ‘Has this happened before?’ she asked Mrs Day.
‘Three times. He’s not very good about taking his readings. Says if he feels all right then he’s fine. The doctor tells him it’s very serious not to do everything properly but he won’t listen.’ Mrs Day looked close to tears.
Beep. The meter showed a glucose reading of two point three. ‘Far too low.’ Nikki nodded to Fraser, who already had an oral dose of glucose ready.
‘Here, Jeremy, let’s get this into you then you’ll soon start to feel better.’ Fraser held the tiny plastic cup to their patient’s lips.
Jeremy jerked
his head aside, knocking the liquid down his shirtfront. ‘Don’t want it.’ He rolled onto his side and drew his knees up to his chest.
Calmly, Fraser reached into the medical pack for a second dose. ‘Yeah, you do,’ he drawled, ‘otherwise we take you to hospital for the doctors to sort this out.’
‘No. Not going to hospital.’
Nikki sighed. ‘We might have to sedate him.’
‘Jeremy, here, drink this.’ Fraser held the sample cup firmly this time. ‘Or we’ll put a needle in the back of your hand.’
Slowly, the man opened his eyes and glared at Jeremy. ‘I don’t want it.’
‘I know, but you’ll feel so much better when you do. Swallow this then your wife can get you some food.’ Fraser pressed the cup gently against Jeremy’s lips. ‘Please.’
The room was quiet for a moment then Mr Day opened his mouth and Fraser quickly tipped the liquid in.
The tension in Nikki’s shoulders relaxed. Very soon Jeremy would start behaving rationally and they’d be able to discuss what to do next.
‘Let’s see how you cope walking to the kitchen,’
Fraser told the man once he was sitting up and looking more alert.
‘I’ll be right as rain, you watch.’ Jeremy’s legs wobbled as he pushed up off the bed but became stronger as he shuffled out of the room.
‘Never have figured out that saying,’ Fraser muttered he followed their patient, suddenly grabbing the man by his arm. ‘Whoops, steady on. You’re not in a race, Jeremy.’
‘Young man, are you challenging me?’ Jeremy looked ten years younger when he smiled.
Nikki grinned. She hadn’t found a patient yet that didn’t adore Fraser. They were eating out of his hand most of the time, especially once the medication or painkillers started doing their job. He had a way that everyone related to. Even her. No matter how hard she tried to keep him at a distance, he was slowly getting under her skin.
As they drove away Fraser ran his knuckles down his cheek. ‘I felt like a bully back there, trying to get Jeremy to take his meds.’
‘You? A bully?’ Nikki rolled her eyes. ‘As if.’
Medical Duo - Dr Chandler's Sleeping Beauty & Christmas with Dr Delicious Page 21