Freefall (New Reality Series, Book Three) by Bella St. James

by St. James, Bella

  “Am I hurting you?”

  “No.” The word came out soft and breathy, and it took his full concentration to keep from stroking her soft skin.

  “Do you need something for pain?”

  “Huh-uh…ow!”

  Clancy pulled his hands away. “I’m sorry.”

  “Ignore me. I’m being a baby.”

  “I’m almost done.” He gave the incision one last swipe before dressing it with new gauze and tape. Running and traveling and carnival rides weren’t what he would have recommended for a speedy recovery; he hoped everything would go smoothly from now on.

  Whatever that turned out to be. He might have burned too many bridges. Running from the warehouse, departing from Mother’s without leaving an itinerary behind, destroying his cell phone, heading the opposite way from the hospital and expert medical care definitely had to be on the list of no-nos for an Underground operative, especially a geek like him. He didn’t have Nate’s lightning-fast reflexes or Vince’s cunning. He was an inside man, protected by others and not expected to do the protecting.

  He could handle a gun, of course, and had a few other survival skills due to his stint in the military. But it had been too many years since he’d had to fight for his life.

  “Let me get you something.” Clancy pulled her shirt back into place and dug through the small white bottles until he found a non-narcotic pain killer. It should take off the edge without drugging her too much. He waited while she picked up her coffee and swallowed the medication.

  The only noise in the room was the crackle of the fire. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d experienced such quiet. He was accustomed to the background noise of a city. Those reassuring sounds were missing here in the land of calm and quiet.

  It freaked him out.

  Nadine watched the dancing flames as she waited for the fire in her spine to calm. The last few miles of the drive had jarred her unmercifully, but she refused to complain. She could be in bed with yet another in a succession of flabby, middle-aged, important men who used her body without knowing she was using their minds. She didn’t understand most of the secrets she retrieved. She didn’t care about times, places or weapons. Her primary concern now was safety.

  If Clancy said they were okay here, she believed him. The sensors were reassuring but not as much as his presence. She’d taken her first tentative steps into the unknown, but he’d been crawling through this particular jungle for a long time. She had only seen a tiny, manipulated slice of the government’s paranoia while he’d been able to get a much wider view. How, she wondered, had he survived so long emotionally?

  She had realized in his flat recitation of his military history that the government’s intent had been to transform him into a killing machine just as she’d been transformed into a sex spy. She wondered what kind of things he’d been asked to do and if he’d obeyed as mindlessly as she had.

  The warmth of the fire and the drugs were lulling her. When Clancy sat on the other end of the sofa, she moved over to curl up beside him. She was so tired of being isolated, sick of feeling alone. She longed for human contact without an ulterior motive. She wanted to know, for the first time in her life, what it was like to kiss someone from sheer desire, to make love without medication.

  “About tomorrow…” Clancy began.

  Nadine put a finger against his lips. “Shh. Let’s pretend nothing exists but tonight.”

  She moved without waiting for an answer, sliding up against his chest and replacing her fingers with her lips. He accepted the kiss without hesitation, his arms wrapping around her and pulling her onto his lap. She settled against his muscular frame and slid her fingers down his arms, shivering as his mouth moved from hers to trace tiny kisses down her jaw and onto her throat. Her flesh warmed and tingled; a slow flush of heat filled her. She closed her eyes and shut out everything except what this man was making her feel.

  She leaned against Clancy’s arms as his hands slipped under the tee and unhooked the clasp of her bra. His fingers lingered, brushing the sides of her breasts. She gasped as his thumbs found her erect and sensitive nipples and sent a surge of pure desire arcing through her.

  “Bed,” his voice rasped in her ear.

  She answered by wiggling from his lap and sliding off her jeans and panties. When Clancy stood, she dropped to her knees, unbuckling his belt and easing down the zipper of his worn jeans. She slid her hands between the rough fabric and his hips, slowly disrobing him as well. With a wide smile, she kissed the tip of his cock before rising and reaching for his hand.

  Instead of taking it, Clancy swept her in his arms and carried her to the wide, turned-down bed. He placed her on the snowy white sheet and lay down to face her.

  “Where were we?”

  “Here.” Nadine placed her hands on the back of his head and brought it to her breast, curving toward him as he tormented first one nipple then the other with tiny nips. She draped a leg over his thigh, putting his erection against her soft, moist pussy. Desire pulsed through her as he teased her tender opening, pushing against her swelled flesh.

  Oh, dear heavens, was this what it felt like without the drugs? With a man she wanted to sleep with instead of one she was forced to be with?

  She breathed Clancy’s name as her hand slid down his hip and across the thatch of hair that curled around what she wanted, needed right now. Before she could close her hand around his thickness, Clancy fingers encased hers and pulled them away.

  “Don’t.” The word came out as a rough plea, and she knew he was close to the edge. The knowledge gave her an unexpected thrill of triumph. He wanted her as she was. No hormones. No mental encouragement. No sexy clothes and expensive perfume. And good lord, did she want him.

  “Let me take care of you.” The words came from Clancy as he flipped her onto her back and covered her with his body. “Just enjoy.”

  Nadine closed her eyes and obeyed. Her hands clasped the top edge of the wooden headboard as Clancy began his exploration. The light touch of his kisses on her eyelids were like butterfly wings; the fierce passion with which he possessed her mouth made every inch of her tingle for more. She nearly exploded when he gripped her hips and tongued his way down to the vee of her thighs.

  “Please.” She forced the word through a tightened throat as she arced against his questing tongue. She wasn’t sure whether she wanted an end to the heavenly torment or for it to last forever. She only knew she had never imagined anything could exist like the new, incredible sensations flooding through her. How could she be twenty-eight, with all her experience, and not know what real lovemaking was?

  Her breaths became shallower as she quivered beneath him. He seemed to know when she reached the precise point where she could no longer hold back. One fast move and he was poised above her, entering her with hard, swift strokes that brought her to a screaming eruption. She felt Clancy come and wondered when he’d put on the condom.

  He held her as she came back to earth, his embrace warm and reassuring. She snuggled against his chest, breathing in his sweaty masculinity, wishing this moment would never end. That they could stay here forever in this unexpected hideaway.

  “Thank you.” Nadine whispered the words against his skin. “I never knew it could be like this.”

  “Neither did I.” Clancy’s response was soft and sincere. “I didn’t plan to do this, but God, I’m glad we did.”

  Sated and sleepy, Nadine smiled and raised her face to his for a goodnight kiss. His arms stayed around her as she drifted into the blankness, feeling safe for the first time in so many years.

  Chapter Five

  It took every bit of Clancy’s determination and sense of duty to leave Nadine alone in the bed. Moments like that, times when he was nothing but a man and not an Undergrounder, were rare. He forced himself to get up and take a quick shower, leaving the door open so he could watch Nadine as she slept and hear the sensors if they were tripped.

  Once dried off and dressed, he went back to the
living room and added wood to the fire. The quiet was bugging him; even the snap of the logs burning and settling were better than dead silence. After flames began to leap higher, he made another pot of coffee and pulled out a paperback book he’d brought from Mother’s. He would have preferred his own e-reader with its variety of mystery and suspense novels, but that was back at the warehouse, along with everything else he owned.

  He’d taken a book that he thought would keep him interested but not draw him in so intensely that he’d get lost in the story. Books had been his refuge since his days at the military school. Loneliness, grief, disappointment, all faded when he entered the world of imagination.

  He smiled wryly as he settled on the couch with his book and cup. Nothing he’d read could touch the life he’d been leading the last few years. Moving from city to city, patching up Undergrounders and the occasional refugee like Nadine had become his new normal. The heart-pumping thrillers he favored had nothing on real life.

  The night passed slowly. Clancy found it hard to concentrate on his reading, frequently putting down his book to look out the windows or check on Nadine. She slept soundly, a combination of exhaustion, drugs and fantastic sex he was certain. He dug into the bag of snacks and decided on the unlikely pairing of beef jerky and yogurt-covered pretzels when he couldn’t choose between them.

  He let the fire die down as dawn began to streak the sky. He watched the change, from pink-tinged darkness to full light, before going into the bedroom to awaken the sleeping woman. To soften the blow, he fixed a cup of fresh cream and sugar-doctored coffee that he took in with him.

  “Good morning, beautiful.” He set the cup on the bedside table and brushed Nadine’s hair from her eyes. “It’s time to get up.”

  She looked up at him through bleary eyes and said, “Go give them more money. I’m never leaving here.”

  Clancy chuckled. If only things were that easy.

  “Sooner or later, you’ll miss soap operas,” he said.

  “Reality shows.” Her voice was stronger; she sounded almost awake. “Wanna go to the island with me?”

  “Would if I was a little more photogenic.” He bent down, kissed her and said, “Coffee’s hot and so’s the water in the shower. If I don’t hear it going in five minutes, I’m dragging you in there myself.”

  “Ooh.” Nadine reached out and ran a hand down his arm. “Is that a promise?”

  “Drink your coffee.” The smile on his face belied the order. “Now that the sun’s out, we need to get moving.”

  She didn’t argue; he was grateful. With all those dark hours to think, he’d come up with a plan. It might not be the best one in the world, but it was better than driving around aimlessly. Despite his longing to stay here another twenty-four hours, even the little time they’d been here might be pushing their luck. If it hadn’t been for his military experience, he might have underestimated the attack at the warehouse. The underground ran a tight ship, though, and only a government agency with unlimited power could have found them and broken through the defense.

  The niggling hinky feeling that had made him abandon Charleston as a destination was even stronger. Most people took staying alive for granted. Since the age of twelve, he’d been trained to realize it was a privilege.

  “I feel so much better.”

  He turned from the coffee pot to see Nadine behind him in one of the outfits Mother had sent with them. Today, she wore soft, clingy pants and a pale blue tee.

  “Yoga pants.” Nadine ran her hand down the outside of her thigh. “They okay or should I put my jeans back on?”

  He knew what she was asking. She wondered if she needed the protection of the heavier denim as they headed into the unknown. They weren’t going to a hike, though. The biggest danger he feared was someone with a gun, and nothing but Kevlar could keep a bullet from piercing her.

  “You look great.”

  She did. The pants hugged her perfect butt, and the tee smoothed across her equally perfect, and as he’d discovered last night, non-surgically enhanced breasts. He forced his mind from how much he’d like to take those clothes right back off her and began to remove the sensors as Nadine grabbed a banana and stood in the kitchen doorway watching him.

  She didn’t want this to end. Tears prickled in Nadine’s eyes as she realized within hours all this could be over. Someone else would take over creating her new life and Clancy would disappear. All she’d ever have of him would be these few days together.

  And last night. Heat flushed through her at the memory of everything they’d done to and with each other. He’d given her the greatest gift she could have received, an affirmation that despite what she’d done over the last decade, she didn’t have to be defined by it.

  “Well, let’s hit the road.”

  She started at Clancy’s voice. He stood by the door, ready to go, while she was daydreaming. She blinked hard to clear her eyes, forced a smile and said, “Let’s go.”

  They walked into a bright, warm morning. A slight breeze moved the leaves, and the scent of fresh-turned dirt drifted on it. Nadine took a long last look at the cottage. She wanted to remember it forever.

  She didn’t question Clancy as they drove back down the narrow driveway and onto the paved road. What did it matter where they went?

  Although she expected him to head back toward the Interstate, he chose a back route instead. The needle stayed right on speed limit as if they were on a leisurely drive. She decided to pretend they were.

  They were rolling through pretty country. More accustomed to cities than open spaces, she liked the hills and valleys of West Virginia. Her eyes widened as they rolled between two walls of solid rock; small trees grew from the hard surface.

  “How did they make the road through here?” she asked.

  “Explosives.” Clancy leaned forward and peered through the windshield at the tall landscape. “It’s not an easy process but cutting highways opened up this whole state.”

  “You sound like a tour guide.”

  Clancy laughed. “My folks loved driving through the south when I was a kid. Almost every summer vacation brought us through places like this, and I pestered my dad until he did all but blast a way through to show me how it’s done.”

  Nadine wondered if he realized this was the first time he’d talked about his past without a hard note in his voice. They’d both been taken from their families, but she’d been given a life of luxury. Clancy hadn’t. Military life was hard, she was certain, but what they’d done with him was horrible. Devising a way to deprive human beings of the need for sleep was inhumane. It was as if those scientists were trying to create living, breathing robots.

  She studied his profile. He said he’d jumped at the chance to fire guns, but she wondered what else he’d wanted to do as a kid. Look at how careful and tender he’d been with her. He would have made a great nurse or even a doctor.

  His instincts and quick reflexes were traits people like police officers and firefighters needed. She could imagine Clancy running into a burning building to save someone trapped inside. That dovetailed perfectly with his sense of duty.

  “Hungry?” His voice interrupted her musing.

  “A little.”

  “We should be coming to a town soon. Maybe we’ll find the right place there.”

  “Sure.”

  See, there was another great thing about Clancy. He’d make an excellent husband. He was thoughtful, he was patient, and he was fantastic in bed. Those were right at the top of her list for Mr. Perfect.

  Nadine followed an impulse and brushed a finger across the scar marring Clancy's left eyebrow.

  "Tell me about this," she said.

  "Fourth grade, monkey bars," he answered.

  "And this?" She touched the barely-visible scar at the bottom of his jaw.

  "Metal bunk bed when I was sixteen. I got stitches and a lecture on horseplay."

  "And the others?"

  His hands tightened on the steering wheel.

 
"I felt them last night," she pressed. "Each one has a story. I know they do."

  "And so do yours." Clancy glanced over at her. "Except they're on the inside and easier to hide."

  She closed her eyes. He was right. She had no business prying. He was entitled to his secrets.

  "The one low on my back is from a knife in a location I'm not supposed to disclose."

  She opened her eyes to see Clancy staring straight ahead.

  "We weren't supposed to be there."

  "I'll never forget my first 'encounter' as an agent." She stared at the passing trees. "I knew perfectly well what I had to do, but the diplomat was old and fat and looked at me like a piece of meat. I walled off the part of me that cared and did what I'd been taught."

  "The hole in my shoulder came from what they call friendly fire." Clancy's voice held bitterness. "Or in my case, not so friendly fire. We'd been ordered to leave no survivors, but I couldn't bring myself to shoot a kid. I took a bullet, then I heard the one that took him out."

  "I traded rewards for self-respect. The more information I got, the better my lifestyle. Best restaurants, high-priced wardrobe, the full spa treatment… I became blind in a way."

  "All that's over." Clancy laid his hand on her thigh. "You're moving into a new life, remember."

  How could she forget, especially with the heat of his touch burning through the thin fabric separating her flesh from his? Last night had been her first time with a man emotionally, the only time she'd trusted a bed partner enough to let go and be herself. Doubt curled into her thoughts, driving her to wonder if she could ever be as free with a man again as she had been with Clancy.

  When his fingers patted her leg reassuringly, she wondered if he was listening in on her thoughts. Sure, he said he was judicious in how he used his military-installed ability, but he wouldn't be the first man to lie to her. She had a long record of believing men who lied to her, including the police officers who had gravely informed her of her parents' death.