by Vi Keeland
Bianca looked down and noticed what I was seeing. “You don’t like my nipples?”
“I like them very much. Too fucking much. I can’t concentrate while they’re taunting me.”
She laughed as though she thought I was amusing but then went to grab her bathrobe. I chugged my full glass of wine in the two minutes that she was gone. When she came back out wearing a sexy, red silk robe that was hanging open, I grabbed her glass and finished it off, too.
Seeing the two empty glasses, Bianca fastened her robe and sat. “Talk to me.”
I didn’t know where to begin. I took a deep breath, followed by a mental snapshot of her as if it was the last time I might ever see her, and then opened my mouth. “Your sister is the spitting image of my father.”
“How is this even possible?”
Dex raked his fingers through his hair. “I called my father after I left. He confirmed that the timeline could work. And that he never used protection.”
“You must be imagining it. Alexandra is so much like my father. They have the same mannerisms, the same sense of humor, they even hold the fork in the same exact odd way!”
“Those things are learned. Not genetic.”
“They both have bushy eyebrows.”
“That’s a fairly common trait. I’d venture to guess that afflicts half the population of Greece.”
“You’re wrong. You have to be wrong.”
Dex took his phone out of his pocket and hit a few buttons, then scrolled until he found whatever he was looking for. Turning it to face me, he extended it palm up. I could see he’d called up Facebook. “It’s my father’s page. Scroll through some of his pictures.”
I hesitated, but eventually curiosity won out. The first picture I landed on, almost stopped my heart. It was as if I was looking at a computer-generated picture of my sister turned into a man. It had to be a coincidence. I swiped again.
My sister’s eyes.
Swiped again.
Alexandra’s chin.
Swiped again.
Her smile. Alexandra’s beautiful smile. Tears welled in my eyes.
Dex reached out his hand and attempted to cover the phone to stop me from looking further. I knocked it away, needing to see more. I swiped and swiped…looking for some semblance of hope that all of the previous pictures were just a bad angle or something. But by the time I frantically reached the end of the pictures, tears were falling.
Dex dropped to his knees and knelt in front of me. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
He tried to hold me, offer me comfort, but I couldn’t let myself let go yet. I needed to know more. “Did your father know?”
“He claims to have had no idea.”
“Does my mother know the truth?”
“I don’t know.”
“She only started working there a year before Alexandra was born. What the hell did she do? Jump in bed with the boss the first chance she had?” I wasn’t really asking Dex a question, even though I had so many.
“I don’t know what really happened. My father was vague on all the details. Sadly, I got the impression it wasn’t because he was intentionally being ambiguous, but rather it was because having an ongoing affair was a regular occurrence for him during his marriage, and he can’t keep them all straight in his mind anymore.”
“I just don’t understand, Dex. How do you have a child that clearly looks like another man and move on? They just ended the affair after she got pregnant, and neither of them ever bothered to question paternity? Everyone just moved on with their lives?”
Dex squeezed my hands. “The affair didn’t end, Bianca. My father said it went on for close to six years.”
I’m not sure if it was my brain’s protective mechanism, or if I was just really that naïve. But I still hadn’t had my moment of epiphany. “Six years? Alexandra and I are only four years apart.”
Dex stared at me, looking deep into my eyes waiting for the click.
5
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1
“Oh my God!” I stood before running to the bathroom. “I think I’m going to be sick.”
I felt like someone had died. There was a hollow in my chest, a sort of achy emptiness, yet that emptiness weighed so heavy. After two hours of talking, crying, and polishing off two bottles of wine, Dex had asked me if I wanted him to leave. I wanted just the opposite—him to stay forever and tell me tomorrow morning that tonight was just a bad dream. Yet now that we were lying in my bed in the dark, the craziness that he could possibly be my brother was really seeping in.
Neither of us said a word for a long time. My back was to him, and his hand was resting gently on my hip until his squeezed and broke our silence. “Ever hear of the Monomotapa monarchy from Zimbabwe?”
I laughed. What the hell was he talking about? “No.”
“Know anything about Cleopatra?”
Ahhh. So that’s where his mind was at? I turned over to face him. It was dark, but my eyes had adjusted enough to see his. “I do, actually. You know she wasn’t really Egyptian. Her family roots trace back to Macedonian Greece.” I knew that wasn’t what he was talking about, but I figured I’d screw with him a little.
It worked. I heard the smile in his voice. “Oh yeah? Figures you’d know that, Georgakopolous. Anything else you learned in history class?”
“She had a thing for bad, heavy eye makeup.”
“Wiseass. You know exactly what I’m referring to.”
I sighed. “Are you saying you don’t care if I’m your half-sister or not?”
The levity was gone from his voice. “I don’t know what I’m saying. The only thing I’m sure of is that I’m in love with you. And there’s no way I’m ready to let you go. No matter what.”
“You say that now. But men look at their sisters very differently than women look at their brothers. There is no way in hell that you’ll be able to think of me sexually, if there really is a chance that we’re related, Dex.”
I saw the whites of his eyes going back and forth as they looked into mine. Finally, he reached for my hand. “Don’t judge.” Then he pulled it down his body until my hand was covering his dick. His rock-hard, fully erect, dick.
I gasped as he wrapped my fingers around it demonstrating that he was definitely able to think of me that way still.
“That answer your question?”
“I guess so.”
Dex chuckled as he brought my hand back up to his lips and kissed the top. Then he leaned forward and kissed my forehead. “Get some sleep. We’ll figure out where to go from here tomorrow.”
“Okay.” I turned over, and Dex pulled me flush against him, my back to his front, wrapping me in a tight hold. Even though I could clearly feel his erection, the hold didn’t feel sexual. It felt…protective.
With his warmth wrapped around me like a blanket, it didn’t take long to succumb to sleep. “Good night, Dex,” I whispered.
“Good night, my Georgy Girl.”
The following day, Dex called from his office in the middle of the afternoon to check on me. Actually, it was one of several times he’d contacted me to make sure I was okay. I hated the sick thought that flashed through my head suddenly.
He’s just doing the protective brother thing.
Shut up!
I hated my brain sometimes.
Dex sounded tired. “How are you feeling?”
“Do you really want to know?”
“Of course.”
“I think I was in shock most of yesterday, but now it’s starting to sink in. And the reality is scaring me.”
“You’re not alone, Bianca. I’m scared, too. In fact, I can’t recall anything that has ever scared me more in my entire life.”
Sadness crept in. I longed for the time before this came to light. “I miss you.”
“I’m still here,” he whispered. “I haven’t gone anywhere.” After some silence, he continued, “We need to know. It’s killing me. Are you ready to f
ind out? I won’t push you unless you’re ready.”
I never ended up having the conversation with my mother the night Dex left my sister’s. Now, that conversation was going to be a totally different ball game because I’d not only be telling her about Dex’s identity but also confronting her about whether Dexter Sr. could have fathered Alexandra and me. What a clusterfuck.
“Where do I start? I feel so helpless,” I said.
“I need to work on convincing my father to agree to a DNA test. I think you need to have the conversation with your mother and sister as soon as possible. We can’t put it off any longer—especially now.”
“Okay,” I agreed. “I’ll call an emergency meeting tonight at my sister’s. We need to get Alexandra to agree to a test as well.”
“Do you want me there when you tell them?”
“Actually, I’m thinking it might be better if I handle it alone. It’s going to be a lot for my sister to take in. I think she would be more comfortable if it was just me.”
“Okay, fair enough. Whatever you think is best. I just wanted to be there to support you if you felt you needed me. Didn’t want you to have to handle the tough stuff alone.”
I hated what I was thinking in that moment.
He apparently could sense something in my silence. “Tell me what’s on your mind right now.”
“You said you didn’t want me to handle it alone, and that made me realize that I might have to get used to a life apart from you. Maybe the sooner I figure out how to do that, the better.”
Dex sounded almost angry. “Don’t say that, Bianca. Don’t even think it.”
My tone changed from quiet to insistent. “It’s true, Dex. I think we need to seriously prepare ourselves for the worst. We’re in denial.”
“Do you think I’m going to just disappear from your life if things don’t turn out in our favor?”
“Well, we certainly can’t remain…close. That would be too painful, don’t you think?”
“Actually, I think the opposite would be far more painful. I can’t imagine my life without you. If it turns out…” He hesitated. “God, I can’t even say it. I can’t even fucking say it.”
I spoke for him. “If the worst happens…”
He gathered his composure and said, “If the worst happens, I will always want to be in your life. As crazy as that sounds, I care about you way too much to let you go.”
I was confused as to what he meant. “So…we’d be…what…like friends?”
“I don’t think we could really put a label on it but—”
“You’re gonna want to see me with other men?”
Dead silence.
“Fuck. No…I can’t even fathom that. But I’d have to suck it up somehow because I’m going to want to protect you even if it kills me. I don’t want you to ever just disappear from my life.”
I could feel my eyes getting moist. “You say that now…but it will be too difficult, Dex. I don’t think I can handle seeing you with other women, seeing you get married, have children someday. God…those kids…they’d be my—”
“Please, Bianca! Don’t go there. I’m begging you not to think about it like that right now, okay? Just let us have these days of denial. It’s the only good thing about this time of waiting. Alright? I’m not saying to pretend it’s not happening, but try not to go there. Okay? Can you do that for me, baby?”
I shut my eyes tightly to fend off the tears. “You shouldn’t call me ‘baby’….until we know.”
“Fuck that.” I could sense that he was gritting his teeth when he said, “You’re my baby and my Georgy Girl. And I’m gonna call you whatever the fuck I want. I’m not going to hide my feelings until the day…the second…I absolutely have to.”
I sniffled away my tears. “I hope that second never comes.”
Sitting side by side on my sister’s couch, they were both completely speechless. Alexandra looked like she was going to pass out. I hated everything about this, but it had to be done. And I was glad it was finally out, because holding it in had been killing me.
I’d spent the past half-hour coming clean to them about what I knew and what I suspected. Dex had given me some pictures of his father as a younger man so that I could show my sister the resemblance. She didn’t dispute it; she couldn’t.
My mother was, of course, shocked to learn about Dex’s identity in the first place but once that was revealed, she didn’t seem all that surprised about my suspicions regarding Alexandra’s paternity.
She finally spoke, “I really didn’t think…”
“What?” I cried. “That we would figure this out? Have you never noticed how much she resembles him?”
“I have noticed. But it wasn’t apparent until she got a bit older. By that time, it was too late. Your dad is your father in all the ways it matters. He loves both of you more than life. The technicality of it truly wasn’t going to make a difference.”
“But you do admit that it is possible…that not only could Dexter Truitt have fathered Alex but that he could be my father, as well?”
“I can’t rule it out. I made a huge mistake in putting us in this predicament. But I was young and reckless. I’d felt trapped at the time, and Dexter was my way out of it. I wasn’t thinking about long-term repercussions, and I certainly could’ve never predicted that one of my daughters would end up in love with his son years later. I’d give anything to take my decisions back, but I just can’t do that.”
My mother was crying, and my sister, who’d been quiet, abruptly got up and ventured to the other room.
I followed her.
“I’m so sorry, Alex.”
The room was dark. She sat on the bed and covered her face. “It’s not your fault. I just need some time to process this.”
“Take all of the time you need.”
She suddenly turned to me. “Why doesn’t she seem more upset? Does she have any clue how much this is going to impact all of our lives? Not only mine…but especially yours?”
“I think she’s in shock. It seems like she’s just been in denial all these years. She never thought we’d figure it out.”
“Does Dad even suspect anything?”
“He has to have suspected,” I said. “Unless he’s never actually seen Dexter Truitt? Honestly, even knowing what I knew, I wouldn’t have thought this was possible until I actually saw the resemblance.”
“You look like Mom,” she said. “I look like neither one of our parents. But I still never suspected anything.”
“I know. Me neither.”
Alex stood up in a panic. “We need to get this test soon. I have to know.”
“Dex is working on getting his father to agree. He’s going to handle all of the logistics once we can get his father’s consent.”
“What if he doesn’t agree?”
“Then, I suppose we can test ourselves against Dad,” I said.
“This whole thing is such a mess. Please tell me you didn’t sleep with Dex.”
“We’ve come close…but never took that step.”
Alex let out a relieved breath. “Thank God, Bianca. Could you imagine?”
That was the thing. I could imagine it. And that fantasy didn’t feel any different than it had before this nightmare. I couldn’t exactly admit that to her at this point. My romantic feelings for Dex hadn’t wavered, and that was going to have to stay between him and me.
I didn’t think anyone else could possibly understand.
As I buttoned my shirt, I looked down at Bandit who was standing at attention and listening to me ramble.
“You might have technically humped your sister, you know. Aren’t dogs inbred all of the time?”
“Ruff!”
“You’re fine, though, right? It wasn’t the end of the world. Nobody judges dogs. Why should they judge me?”
He just stared at me, panting with his tongue hanging out.
“It still seems a little fucked up. Shouldn’t I feel differently about her, Bandit? Knowing what
I know? But I don’t. I want her. In some ways, I don’t even want to know the truth. And I certainly can’t stand back and bear witness to her moving on with her life. I want her with me.” Spraying on some cologne, I looked over at him. “What do you think about a move to Europe? I heard incest is not as frowned upon there. We can all be happy there: you and your inbred ass, me, Bianca, and our two-headed baby. What do you say?”
“Ruff!”
When I realized I was running significantly late for my dinner with Jelani, I quickly fastened my watch.
“Be a good boy,” I said before heading to the door.
Since he hadn’t been feeling too well, I opted to take Jelani out to a restaurant in Brooklyn, so he could be close to his house if he felt he suddenly needed to go home.
After I’d ordered four different family-sized platters at the Italian restaurant, my gaunt-looking friend said, “I didn’t realize we were expecting an army.”
The waitress had set down large portions of chicken and eggplant Parmesan, lobster ravioli, and vegetable lasagna.
“You need something that sticks to your bones. And you’re taking the leftovers home with you, too.”
I let Jelani do most of the talking. My mind was elsewhere as he told some stories from Kenya and spoke about whether or not to renew his spot at the flea market for the upcoming year.
At one point, he raised his voice and interrupted my thoughts. “Dex, I’ve been talking to you for a half hour, and you’ve been staring off into space half of the time.”
Shaking my head quickly, I said, “I’m sorry. I’m just feeling very anxious tonight.”
“About the test…”
“Yes. My father finally agreed to do it, but only after he returns from his vacation in Turks.”
“Well, at least he agreed to cooperate. That was half the battle, wasn’t it?”