"In about two hours. Be sure to take some backup with you just in case. You should be back in time for the party. Everyone expects to see you coming back victorious. This shipment means a lot of cash for us."
"Of course, Pops. I’ve got this." Diesel hung up, shaking his head and throwing his phone back down on the pile of clothes he left on the floor before with a thud.
Diesel began to jog in place and clap his hands together, getting his adrenaline pumping. He had to be ready to be that guy; the one that would beat you to the brink of passing out before finally letting you go to make a mistake again. He reminded himself of all the reasons he had to be angry with the world and with himself and channeled it before he picked up his phone again and began texting those he thought would be of the most use to him.
Hey, it's a rumble before the party tonight. Meet me at the port.
Diesel picked up a pair of jeans and a comb, running it through his hair before slipping his jeans on. It felt a lot like he was putting on layers like a mask. He had felt like that his whole life, but he still had not figure out by 28 what would make him feel real. Some of the members once told him he needed to get himself an old lady, but he knew that could never happen again. His job in the MC was way too dangerous to involve a woman or anyone he loved for that matter. And getting involved with one of the few women who were part of the MC was more than complicated. That was part of why it hadn't worked out with...
Diesel shook his head, not wanting to think about that. Even though it had been a few months it was still a fresh wound; mostly because he had just announced it to everyone in the past month. They had kept the failure of their short marriage a secret until they had both come to terms with it. Because of that he had developed a new fear; a fear like he had never had before. Diesel wasn’t the kind of guy to be afraid of much, but now he was afraid of someone loving him.
Diesel shook the obtrusive thoughts out of his head as he shadow-boxed his way into his bedroom. A second workout for the day wouldn’t hurt. It was the best way he knew how to stay physically fit and mentally stable. It was a trick he’d learned while behind bars for things he sometimes still couldn’t believe he had done.
He swung at the air like his life depended on it; imagining that someone who deserved it was right in front of him. He spent the next 20 minutes or so like that as his body began to sweat once again. His abs were glistening with the sweat, and his breathing was heavy as he finally stopped and decided to pull on his shirt. He knew he really should go wash off again but he wasn’t in the mood for another shower at the moment, and there probably wasn’t time anyway.
He threw on his jacket and grabbed his keys, ready for whatever happened when he met with Lotten for the next shipment. He knew it was time to forget about the fact that the man had a family and do his job. It had become so easy to wipe his mind and heart of any feeling when it came to things like that. It used to scare him, but now that a woman had left him angry and broken inside, it didn’t make too much of a difference anymore. A job was a job.
Walking out to his motorcycle; a red and black Harley with the symbol for the MC on it just like what was tattooed on his left shoulder, he felt a breeze brush by his cheek and knew it would be a great ride. He hopped on and revved up the engine, listening to it roar to life with a kind of pleasure. It was the most thrilling and comforting sound in the world and he was still so thankful every day that he’d found something like that.
Diesel took off, flying around his house and then down the streets leading out of his neighborhood and towards the highway. The only thing better than the fact that the wind was whipping past him at impossible speeds was the smell coming off the water as he headed closer and closer to the port. There was nothing more amazing than living so close to so many bodies of water. He had no idea how people lived their landlocked lives elsewhere. Even in prison he had been able to smell the ocean when he was outside. It was one of the things that kept him going.
Chapter 5
Diesel’s phone rang, and he just about jumped out of his skin. He was sure he wouldn’t feel any guilt over the fact that he'd had to teach Lotten a lesson. He had not brought the total shipment of heroine they’d been promised, so the dealers were going to be short supplied. Pops was not going to put up with that situation anymore. But Diesel felt himself wondering how the kids would take it; how his wife would take it when they saw how injured he was. At least he wasn't dead. That’s what he kept telling himself anyway.
He pulled to the side of the highway and picked up his phone, certain it would be Pops to make sure the job had been done as he asked, but the voice on the other end didn’t belong to a male at all. In fact, the person on the phone could do a lot more damage to him than Pops could dream of.
"Hi, Diesel," a raspy woman's voice drifted into his ear. He silently cursed as he hopped off his bike and kicked the dirt piled on the side of the highway as hard as he could manage, watching it fly into the air with satisfaction. He should have looked at the screen before answering.
"Sophia, why the hell are you calling me? I thought we agreed on a clean break and all of that. How am I supposed to let go of what I thought we had if you keep calling me up?" He tried to sound angry, but his words came out sounding more defeated. He hated himself for allowing her to break him down that way.
"Woah, look Diesel, I don’t know if I can stick to all of that agreement. I understand that you're hurting, but how do you think I feel? You couldn’t accept who I was. That hurts just as bad, if not more. That's why I called. I wanted to talk to you and warn you about some things. I'm back in town, and I'll be back with The Shadows at some point. It's a part of who I am, and I can't let that go."
Diesel could feel his blood begin to boil. The Shadows had been his MC; his safe haven that he had introduced her to a long time ago. He had been glad at the time she'd fit in so well and been able to become a member, but he had been regretting it ever since things had gone south for them. She had been so understanding after their divorce had gone final. She had agreed to keep her distance for a while and think long and hard before ever working for The Shadows again. She had agreed that they were his and not hers. He should have known she was just pretending to be alright with everything. That was who she was; a really great liar.
Diesel remained silent, waiting to hear what else she had to say. There was nothing he could think of that would pop out of his mouth and make things any better for him. "Look, you can't expect to go making deals with someone and have someone be loyal to you after you've broken up; especially when it was a marriage that ended in divorce. I've given you time and space, but now I get to move on and focus on myself. It's something you'll have to come to terms with. I already have." Diesel wondered in what way she had come to terms with that and how many men it involved. He closed his eyes and pictured her thick, curvy body and the tattoos that covered her from head to toe. She was like a modern Betty Paige or Marilyn Monroe complete with a perfect pout and black and red locks. But underneath all the punk beauty was a manipulative seductress who couldn’t be trusted. She was a regular Eve and how she got to move on with no pain or consequences while he suffered in silence, he would never quite grasp.
"You do whatever you want, Sophia, but don’t expect me to look at you like I know you."
He hung up on her shaking with anger. The only thing that made him start his engine again was the fact that he had a report to give to Pops and a party to get to. There he would be able to drink and get a new tattoo to cover up the one he had gotten for her so long ago. Perhaps he would begin to forget about the pain she had caused once it healed.
He pulled back out onto the road going way too fast for his own good, but he needed to feel the exhilaration of a dangerous ride. Once he reached about seventy-five miles an hour he popped a wheelie causing those on the road to honk at him in warning. He didn’t care. It felt amazing, and he let out a big laugh before placing his bike carefully back down just in time to exit the highway.
H
e was glad to be so close to the bar so he could get inside and find a way to forget about the awful phone call he had to endure and enjoy his last days with The Shadows without Sophia around to ruin it for him.
When he pulled into the parking lot he could see several members starting to stream in for the party as well as the women that had been picked to party with them for the night. The MC had few female members, and many of the younger men hated getting involved with someone they would see every day if things went south anyway. So, they often hired escorts, or went out and brought in college girls who would keep quiet about whatever they saw there, to party with the MC.
He pulled haphazardly into a parking space at the side of the bar and decided to cut into the back and see if he could get in for a tattoo right away.
Diesel put on his game face and made his way through the door. He knew he was giving off his usual cocky and dangerous vibe as he passed by several members that moved out of his way down the hallway. He peeked his head into the tattoo room only to find a couple of drunk girls in there flirting and getting tattoos. He would have to wait until later. So, his intention was to head to report to Pops and get a drink.
As he came down the hallway and reached the end he was stopped in his tracks by a girl he didn't recognize. He had to think fast because his mind was becoming a little jumbled by the fact that she looked amazing and not at all like other girls involved with the MC. He guessed someone had invited her. Her hair was long and messy but in a sexy sort of way. Her stomach was completely bare, and it was flat and smooth to the point where he wanted to touch it just to see what it felt like. Her leather pants hugged her so tight that he could see every curve of her legs. But there were so many reasons he couldn’t get involved with her or even let on that he was interested. His heart couldn’t handle it, and he could tell by looking at her that she wasn't like the other girls there. She was a good, nice girl even under all the black clothes and makeup. She deserved better than a dangerous life with some criminal sleezeball belonging to the MC. Diesel hoped she was on her way out, and just to be sure, he said the rudest thing that came to mind.
"Would you mind moving out of the way?" the girl nodded her head slowly and stepped slightly to the side. "I don't know who found you, but I don’t think any of us want a dumb chick who also doesn't even look like a woman," he said coldly.
The look of hurt on her face almost made him hurt. But it was for her own good. He was about to look away and move on when none other than Spencer stepped up beside her protectively and glared at him. Was she there with Spencer? Diesel had never seen him with a girl in a romantic way before, and this girl seemed way out of his league. But at least it meant she would be treated better than being with a full-fledged member.
Things got even worse, however, when Don, the bartender and longtime associate of The Shadows came up to them and started yelling. Don was kind of like a tattooed Santa, at least in the looks department. But he wasn't a guy to be messed with. He was pretty tough and had gotten even tougher since the death of his son due to some irresponsibility on the part of the MC.
As he listened in, he realized that the girl he had been so taken by was none other than Don's granddaughter; the unintended victim of what happened to her father. She had lost both parents, and she was sort of a legend in the MC, though no one had ever actually seen her in person.
He knew instantly that he could never be involved with her. She was off limits for so many reasons, and he couldn’t believe she had been allowed in the bar even. Diesel looked upon the girl, whose name was apparently Kim, with sympathetic eyes.
"You're Jerry's daughter?" he asked her softly as he looked her up and down. It was like he was expecting traces of a tragic childhood to be tattooed all over her, but she was flawless. It was driving him insane. It took everything Diesel had in him to walk away.
Diesel went up to the bar and waited for Don to come back to it after he was done ripping into his granddaughter and Spencer. There was still something so off about the relationship with her and Spencer. He knew they grew up close to each other, but seeing them together romantically just seemed to set some alarm off inside of Diesel.
When Don waddled back behind the bar, he didn't look like he was in the mood to be taking Diesel’s order. He looked red faced and dangerous. Diesel glanced down at the rings the man always had all over his hands and wondered how effective they were at making punches hurt more because it seemed like a real possibility that Don would punch Diesel at the moment, especially if he'd heard the rude things he'd said to Kim.
"You don’t have to say anything, Don. I can see that you're completely pissed and rightfully so. I had no idea who she was or that she was here." Diesel put his head down as Don slid him a bottle of Jack. That was his favorite poison.
"Damn right I'm angry, Diesel. That girl does not belong hanging around here, and she doesn’t deserve to be involved in this life. If she’d had any family other than me after what happened to her parents, I would have sent her to be with them to avoid her getting involved in this. It's not right for a girl like her. She's too delicate."
Diesel’s head snapped up at the description. he somehow felt offended by it. Somehow he doubted that a girl who could lose her father to a notorious MC and walk into their hangout knowing the wrath it would bring from her grandfather if she was so fragile. Sure, she deserved better than being involved with The Shadows and a guy like him or Spencer, but it wasn't anything to do with her strength.
"Not that it's my place, Don, but I think you may have misjudged her there."
Don looked furious, and Diesel instantly knew he'd said the wrong thing. "Just because your stepfather was involved in the tragedy with my son does not mean you know anything about her at all. You've seen her for all of thirty seconds, and I expect it to stay that way. You're an integral member to this MC, and I respect you for that, but you are no one I want near my granddaughter. You will stay away from her or you will have to answer to me and Pops. Don’t think for a second he would approve of the way you were looking at his biggest liability."
Diesel took a swig of Jack and stood up, glaring at Don to make sure he understood he felt insulted and infuriated. He didn’t need to be reminded of his inadequacy, and he certainly didn’t like how Don had noticed the way he had looked at Kim. He hoped Kim didn’t notice, otherwise he was going to be in so much trouble.
Deciding it was time for that tattoo, he wondered back off into the hallway and kicked the drunk girls out of the room. He didn’t care about the consequences. He just needed his brain to stop running in circles.
"Make it a good one," he told the tattoo artist as he climbed into the chair, Jack Daniels still in hand.
Chapter 6
Diesel woke up in a sweat for the third time in the past week, and he hated to admit the reason behind it considering it involved some run in he had with a certain blonde woman that had enchanted him for some unknown reason. He wanted to blame it on the fact that he felt sorry for her or some unforeseeable connection because of her parents and his connection to the situation, but Spencer had more of a connection than he did. The truth was that Kim was more than just sexy; she was smart, strong, curious and completely infuriating in an enchanting sort of way. Diesel felt like an addict the way he was having withdrawal from just the few times he had seen her.
Despite any orders or warnings either of them had gotten about staying away from each other, they had run into each other two more times since the scene they made at the party. He was almost positive it was purposeful as well on both Spencer's and her part. Did she realize just how manipulative Spencer was, or did she still see him as the barely involved boy next door?
Diesel swung his leg out from under his crumpled comforter and climbed slowly out of his full size bed. His mattress squeaked and groaned at him as he stretched and stood up, shuffling his feet towards the bathroom. Just like the other mornings he woke up from a dream his subconscious had produced about Kim, he needed to get into the shower
and turn the cold water on full force before he made a dumb mistake like calling his ex for a hook up. What a disaster that would be.
He stripped down to nothing but his tattoos and hopped in, gasping as the cold water blasted his back. It was for the best, though, as images from his dream began to come back to him. He had dreamed of being the one to peel off those leather pants inch by inch and taste what was under there. He imagined her with flawless pale skin that glowed in the moonlight that shown through his third story apartment window.
Diesel felt his head rest against the cold shower tile as he tried to erase the images and calm his body. The truth was that it was never going to happen for so many reasons. First of all, both Pops and Don would have him by the balls and probably chop them right off if they knew he was even thinking about her, and second, he couldn’t put her through that. He hoped that one day she’d get to experience a man outside of The Shadows; one that would want to wait and make the wedding night special who didn’t have impure thoughts every time they thought of her name. She deserved a man who made a lot of legitimate money who could make all of her dreams come true outside of the bedroom. He was not anywhere near that guy, and he couldn’t warn her that Spencer wasn't that guy either without getting way too close for comfort.
His mind traveled back to their first encounter only two days after the incident at the party. He had been shocked to see her dare to walk into the bar after what had happened, but Spencer came strutting in with her like he was some god in the late afternoon. Diesel had been shooting some pool with a couple of the other members and sharing prison stories when he caught a glimpse of her from across the room. Kim had kept looking at him like she wanted to say something, and it had made him feel guilty for the things he had said. He wasn't about to apologize, though, especially with the glares he was getting from Spencer. But the minute Spencer disappeared to his office, Kim had made a beeline for Diesel.
BAD BOY ROMANCE: DIESEL: Contemporary Bad Boy Biker MC Romance (Box Set) (New Adult Sports Romance Short Stories Boxset) Page 3