Esther ran her tongue over her lips. Her anguish was evident. Her slender fingers worked the edge of the sheet anxiously.
“Dr. Hollander could hypnotize you. When you are hypnotized, your mind can’t keep your bad memories hidden as easily. Dr. Hollander will be able to tell if I am wrong.”
“I…I don’t know if I want to do that. Why should I see a psychiatrist? I’m not crazy.”
“I never said you were crazy, Esther. It just so happens that the best expert I know in hypnosis is also a psychiatrist. No one thinks you’re crazy.
“And once you get this business cleared up, you will feel better. If I’m wrong, then that will be the end of it. And if I’m right-why you will become a very famous and important person. Everyone in Portsmouth will be grateful to you for clearing up this horrible crime.
“And it will certainly help when I go to welfare to get your son back, if I can tell them how helpful you are being in clearing up this very serious case.”
“You think this would help with the welfare, if I saw the doctor?”
“I’m positive.”
“And you think it’s important?”
“This is very important, Esther. There are a lot of people who will be very grateful to you.”
“Uh, this wouldn’t be in the papers, would it?”
Shindler sensed a note of interest.
“If the doctor finds out that you did see the murders, you would be our star witness.”
Shindler waited while she mulled it over. She took a while before she spoke. When she did speak, her voice betrayed great nervousness and apprehension. But there was something else hidden below the surface. A sense of excitement.
“I want to think, Mr. Shindler. I can’t say now. But maybe I will-if it’s so important.”
4
“Dr. Hollander, this is Esther Pegalosi.”
The doctor was standing in front of an antique rolltop desk when Esther and Roy Shindler entered his office.
“I am pleased to meet you, Mrs. Pegalosi,” the doctor said, flashing her his best Kris Kringle smile. “Roy has told me quite a bit about you.”
Esther looked up nervously at Shindler. The doctor noticed and added, with a laugh, “Oh, it’s all been good. He is quite thrilled that you have consented to help him on this case and I think that you will find all of this quite exciting.
“Now, may I ask you a personal question?” Hollander asked in a serious tone.
“What is it?” Esther asked warily.
Hollander broke into a grin.
“May I call you Esther? I hate calling people by their last names. It’s so stuffy.”
Esther smiled with relief. She had expected some inquiry into her sex life or early childhood or whatever it was that psychiatrists asked you about. She was surprised at how down-to-earth Dr. Hollander was. He wasn’t at all what she had expected.
“Sure. Esther is fine.” She lowered her eyes. “No one calls me Mrs. Pegalosi anyway.”
“Good. Then Esther it is. Would you like to sit down?” Hollander asked, leading Esther to a comfortable, soft-colored sofa that sat against one oak-paneled wall under the shadow of a multicolored abstract painting.
Esther accepted the doctor’s offer as if it had been an order. He watched her move mechanically to the sofa and sit, hands folded, like a wind-up toy. Shindler sat out of sight in a straight-back chair set in a corner of the room.
“That’s a nice dress you have on. Is it new?”
Esther brightened at the mention of her outfit. It was a green skirt with a matching green jacket and a white blouse. Shindler had taken her shopping when she agreed to visit Dr. Hollander and she had picked it out herself. It was the first new outfit she had purchased in years.
“Tell me, Esther, I bet you’re nervous. Am I right?”
Esther blushed and looked at the floor.
“I’m a little nervous, I guess.”
“Good!” Dr. Hollander said with a hearty laugh that startled her. “Everyone who visits me is nervous the first time. So that shows that you’re normal. Now why don’t you tell me why you’re nervous.”
Esther worried her lower lip and shrugged.
“I don’t know.”
Hollander smiled a warm, fatherly smile. She was beginning to like this nice man.
“Are you worried about being hypnotized?”
She did not answer immediately. Hollander waited patiently.
“A little, I guess,” she finally answered.
“Okay. That’s good. I’m glad you’re open and honest with me, because I will always be open and honest with you. Now, I want you to promise me something. Will you do that?”
“What?”
“Will you promise me that anytime you have a question, no matter how silly you think it might be, you will ask me that question? I mean it. I want you to know everything that is going on. We will have no secrets from one another. Is that all right with you?”
“I guess.”
“Good. Now tell me, have you ever been hypnotized before?”
“No.”
“Have you ever seen anyone hypnotized on TV or in the movies or in person?”
“Once on TV and in a movie.”
“Okay. Now I want to tell you that what you see in the movies or TV is not the way hypnosis is at all. It is a form of relaxation during which it is possible to follow suggestions more easily. There is nothing mysterious about it. It is a scientific phenomenon and perfectly natural.
“On TV you see evil hypnotists make slaves of people, rob them of their will and make them do all sorts of horrible things. Do you think I am evil, Esther?”
Esther giggled.
“No.”
“Good. Well, I can assure you I am not. And all those silly stories you see in the movies are fantastic rubbish. Hypnosis is not possible unless a person willingly participates in it. You can’t make a hypnotized person do anything he doesn’t want to, because he can refuse to do anything that is distasteful to him. Hypnosis is a way of helping people, not hurting them. It is like medicine.”
“What…what if I can’t be hypnotized?”
“Don’t worry about that. Everyone can be hypnotized if they relax and don’t resist. Just make your mind passive and unresisting and don’t try too hard and I’ll do the rest.”
Hollander suddenly became serious.
“Esther, you know that we’re here primarily to find out what you know about a certain event. Well, that is one thing, but hypnosis has more value than just finding out about something you may have forgotten. Hypnosis is a way of helping you to master yourself and your problems.
“You were recently in the hospital, because of personal problems, weren’t you?”
Esther lowered her head and nodded.
“Well, Esther, I will be serious here for a moment. We all want to find out what you know about Richie Walters’s murder, but I am also interested in you as a person.
“Roy tells me that you have raised a fine young son, all by yourself. That says something about your character. I can see that you have the potential to be a strong, confident woman. Hypnosis can help you to realize that potential. Through hypnosis, I can help you to be the person I know you can be. So, you see, you will help us and we will help you. Is that fair?”
“Yes,” Esther answered in a low voice. She was overwhelmed. No one had ever taken this much interest in her before.
“Well, now. We are getting way too serious. Let’s move to that comfortable chair near my desk and we’ll begin.”
Hollander led Esther to a large armchair. When she was seated, he placed a pillow under her head and drew a seat up in front of her.
“Are you comfortable? Good. Now I want you to relax and keep both feet resting on the floor. I am going to tell you exactly what is going to happen to you as we go along, so that there will be no surprises,” he said in a soothing, steady tone. “You will notice, as we proceed, that you will relax. You will probably begin to feel drowsy. It won’t be n
ecessary for you to try too hard. All you have to do is make your mind passive and relax. Then you will become aware that certain things are happening to you as you relax. I want you to concentrate on these things. I will bring them to your attention.
“While we are doing this, you must remember that hypnosis is a normal experience. Each night, before dozing off, you go through a state that resembles hypnosis. I don’t want you to go to sleep, because I want you to be aware of what I say and aware of what your thoughts are. But, if you do find yourself falling asleep, don’t worry. I want you to be comfortable and I will awaken you. I want this to be a relaxing and pleasant experience. I won’t ask you any questions that will embarrass you. Make your mind passive and do not analyze your thoughts and sensations. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Now lean back. Are you completely comfortable and relaxed?”
“Yes.”
Hollander reached over and switched on a tape recorder that sat on a table near Esther’s head. Shindler shifted quietly in his seat.
TAPE # 1
DR. ARTHUR HOLLANDER: Okay, Esther. Why don’t you place both of your hands palm down on your thighs. No, don’t close your eyes. Keep watching your hands. If you concentrate on your hands, you will notice that you can observe them very closely.
When you sit and relax, you begin to notice things that you have never noticed before. They have always happened when you relax, but you have never been aware of them. I am going to point them out to you.
Esther, I want you to concentrate on all the sensations and feelings in your hands, no matter what they may be. Perhaps you may feel the heaviness of your hand as it lies on your thigh, or you may feel pressure. Perhaps you will feel the texture of your new skirt as it presses against the palm of your hand or the warmth of your hand on your thigh. Perhaps you may feel a tingling. No matter what the sensations are, I want you to observe them.
(PAUSE)
DR. HOLLANDER: Good, Esther. Keep watching your hand. See how quiet it is. How it remains in one position. There is motion there, but it is not yet noticeable. I want you to keep watching your hand. Your attention may wander from the hand, but it will always return to the hand, and you will keep wondering when the motion that is there will show itself.
It will be interesting to see which of your fingers will move first. It may be the ring finger or the thumb. One of the fingers is going to jerk or move. You don’t know when or on which hand. Keep watching and you will begin to notice a slight movement, possibly in the right hand. There, the thumb is jerking. It’s moving, just like that.
As the movement begins, you will notice an interesting thing. Very slowly, the spaces between the fingers will widen. The fingers will move apart and you will notice that the spaces between the fingers will get wider and wider. They will move slowly apart. The fingers will seem to be spreading wider and wider and wider. See how they spread. Slowly moving wider and wider apart.
Good, Esther. You are doing fine. The fingers are so wide apart. And soon you will notice that the fingers will want to arch up from the thigh, as if they want to lift higher and higher. Notice how your index finger is lifting. As it does, the other fingers will want to follow upward-slowly rising, up, up.
See how the other fingers are rising now. As they lift, you will become aware of a feeling of lightness, so much so that the fingers will arch up and the whole hand will slowly lift and rise as if it feels like a feather, as if a balloon is lifting it up in the air, lifting, lifting-up, up, up-pulling it higher and higher and higher. The hand is so light, so very light. As you watch your hand rise, you will notice that the arm comes up, up, up in the air, a little higher and higher and higher.
Keep watching the hand and arm as it rises straight up and you will soon become aware of how drowsy and tired your eyes become. As your arm continues to rise, you will get tired and relaxed and sleepy, very sleepy. Your eyes will get heavy and your lids may want to close. And as your arm rises higher and higher, you will want to feel more relaxed and sleepy, and you will want to enjoy the peaceful, relaxed feeling of letting your eyes close and of being asleep.
Your arm is stretched out directly in front of you now. You cannot take your eyes off your hand, yet your lids are getting heavy, very heavy, and your breathing is getting slow and regular. Breathe deeply, in and out.
As you keep watching your hand and arm and keep feeling more and more drowsy and relaxed, you will notice that the direction of the hand will change. The arm will bend and the hand will move closer and closer to your face-up, up, up-and as it rises you will slowly but steadily go into a deep, deep sleep in which you will relax deeply and to your satisfaction. The arm will continue to rise up, up-lifting, lifting up, until it touches your face and you will get sleepier and sleepier, but you must not go to sleep until your hand touches your face. When the hand touches your face, you will be asleep, deeply asleep.
Your hand is now changing direction. It is moving up toward your face very slowly. Your eyelids are getting heavy. You are getting sleepier and sleepier and sleepier. Your eyelids are blinking faster and faster, because you are trying to fight sleep. Do not fight sleep. Welcome sleep. Let your eyes get heavy, very heavy and let the hand move up toward your face. You get very tired and drowsy. Your eyes are closing. When your hand touches your face, you will be asleep, deeply asleep. You are drowsy. Your eyes are like lead. Your hand moves to your face. It is almost touching. It is touching and your eyes close-now.
Good, Esther. Go to sleep, just sleep. And as you sleep you feel tired and relaxed. I want you to concentrate on relaxation, a state of tensionless relaxation. Think of nothing else, but sleep, deep sleep.
(PAUSE)
DR. HOLLANDER: Now, Esther, remember I told you that I was interested in you? That I saw great potential in you?
ESTHER PEGALOSI: Yes.
Q: Well, I said that because I have confidence in you and I feel that you can be the strong, confident person you want to be. That you can be anything you want to be. I am going to begin now to teach you how to be that strong, confident person. Would that be something you want to be?
A: Yes.
Q: Fine. You can put your hand down now. Just relax. You can open your eyes if you want to. Look around and reassure yourself of your surroundings and then let your eyes close again. That’s it. That’s fine.
Esther, I am going to touch your wrist now. I want you to pay attention to the feelings in your wrist. Feel completely the touch of my fingers on your wrist and when you feel that you have that feeling firmly in mind so that you can remember it easily, you can indicate that by saying “yes” without disturbing the trance at all.
(PAUSE)
PEGALOSI: Yes.
HOLLANDER: Good. Fine. Now, Esther, if it is all right with you, any time in the future that I take your wrist in this way and the situation is appropriate, you can remember the way you feel now. You can go into a deep hypnotic trance, a trance deep enough to achieve whatever goal is in your mind, whether the goal is remembering a pleasant incident in the past or a goal of ignoring discomfort or the goal of feeling like the strong, confident person that you know you can be. And if your subconscious mind is willing to respond in this way, it will cause the first finger of the right hand to move up into the air, and we can wonder will that finger move, will the unconscious cause it to move. You can think about that finger and it is-it’s moving up into the air and it continues to move up into the air, all by itself. Yes. Good. Good! That’s it, Esther, just relax. Now at anytime in the future that I take your wrist in this way, you can respond fully, you can respond confidently, knowing that when you awaken from such an experience, you will be more capable of being the kind of person you really want to be; the kind of person you have always known you could be. With increasing anticipation, Esther, you will awaken each morning looking forward to behaving, being and looking more like the kind of person you have always known you could be.
Now, I am going to ask you to awaken in
a moment bound by each of these three suggestions: the suggestion of responding rapidly to your signal, the sensation of my fingers on your wrist; the suggestion of responding with a deep enough trance to achieve the goal that you have in mind; and the suggestion that you respond confident of being a better person in every way, a little better each day. Not dramatically, but just a little better each day. More like the kind of person you really want to be. Anytime in the future that I take your wrist and the situation is appropriate, you can respond easily, profoundly and rapidly.
In a moment, I am going to count from one to three and I will ask you to awaken feeling good, feeling refreshed and feeling tremendously satisfied. As I count from one to three, your unconscious mind can pay attention to that counting and those instructions, so that any time in the future, no matter who introduces the hypnotic experience, whether you bring the experience back by yourself or whether you permit someone else to induce the trance, you will be able to terminate the trance easily and rapidly by simply following the suggestions that I give you now:
One, you think of awakening. Two, you take a very deep breath and feel the energy coming back all through your body. Three, you are awake, wide awake.
(PAUSE)
HOLLANDER: How about that? How do you feel?
PEGALOSI: Fine. It was…I don’t know-funny. I got dizzy watching my finger come up by itself.
(LAUGHTER)
Q: The surprising thing is that it does come up by itself. And you did it. So you see that when you go under, you can achieve anything, virtually anything.
A: I guess.
Q: Even things that you don’t even realize you have the power to achieve. Do you see that?
A: Yes…I guess.
Q: Okay. Do you remember the instructions that I gave you on how to put yourself into a trance?
A: To think about my hand, do you mean?
Q: Not exactly. You missed it a bit. You recall the feeling of my fingers on your wrist?
A: Yes. I remember now.
Q: Would you like to try going under just with that?
Heartstone Page 14