She found that extremely doubtful. But she could try to frame it positively. Even in her darkest moments she could try to find the light. “Will it help me get back to work faster?”
Natalie smiled. “If that’s what it takes to convince you to do it, then yes.”
Maybe this was her excuse to scoot out early. “Should I go tell him now?”
“May as well. I want to give the two of you an assignment beforehand. I’d like you to write down your biggest fears with regard to your relationship.”
What was this, a psychological game show? Maybe Natalie wouldn’t notice if Caroline didn’t do it. “Fine.”
“This was another good day, Caroline. Remember that.”
Oh, yeah. She’d write it in her diary and draw little hearts around it when she got back to her room. “I’ll go talk to him.”
Chapter Twenty
Jack McIntyre told people to jump and they jumped. But he wanted much more from Caroline than that. His wife would come when he summoned her. He had that kind of power. And he would make sure she’d never forget it.
He smiled when she arrived. “Thank you for coming in today, Major.”
Caroline nodded hesitantly. Her trepidation amused him.
“How is your therapy going?” he asked.
“Fine.”
“Do you know why I asked you to come in today?”
“No,” she whispered.
Jack marched over to her. “You miss me, don’t you?” He twirled a finger in her hair and leaned down to kiss her collarbone.
She shivered. “I don’t-”
“Don’t lie, baby. You’ve never been any good at it.” He kissed her neck. “Do you miss me?”
It took a while but she finally answered. “Yes.”
“How much?” Jack asked, tracing a trail down her upper torso.
“I-”
“I miss you too.” He squeezed one of her breasts. “More than you’ll ever know.” He smiled as her knees buckled. “I miss playing with you. Do you want to play, Caroline?”
She stiffened. “I don’t – I don’t know.”
“I think you do.” Jack pulled up her sweater and blouse, swiping his palm over her stomach. She was appealing as hell in uniform but street clothes made her much more attractive. “Tell me you want to play.”
“We’re at work,” Caroline said. “We shouldn’t-”
“I’m at work,” he corrected. “You’re off duty, technically speaking. And I’m the commander. I can do anything I want.”
She gazed upon him with wide eyes. “Anything?”
“Anything,” he said. “I know you want it too. It’s okay to admit it.”
“I don’t-”
She’d get on board soon enough. A slow seduction would get her up to speed. “Don’t say no,” he whispered.
“Jack-”
He nuzzled her neck, kissing his way back up to her lips. “Tell me you don’t miss me and I’ll stop.”
“Jack-”
He loved the way she kept saying his name. So needy. So reluctant. “Say it. I’ll know if you’re lying.”
“I can’t-”
He kissed her deeply, chuckling against her lips as she laced her fingers through his hair. She wasn’t able to hide her feelings anymore. “We need to cover some ground rules,” he said. “I find your behavior to be inappropriate.”
She backed away from him. “In what sense?”
“You have not shown the proper respect to your superior officers.”
Caroline cleared her throat, regaining her composure. “My only superior officer is you.”
He smiled. “I know. But you are sorely lacking in certain areas of performance.”
She took another step backward. “What do you mean?”
She was trembling again. He liked that. “Your conduct around me has been, shall we say, less than acceptable.”
Caroline blushed and stared down at the floor.
“Look at me,” Jack said.
She brought her eyes to his. “What have I done wrong?”
His strides were confident. Smooth. Aggressive. A few short steps toward her and she was backed against the wall. “Don’t even think about leaving,” he said. “Do us both a favor and lock the door.”
Jack waited. Would she listen to him? Desire lay dormant in her eyes, but he could sense her apprehension. He tried not to laugh as she walked her fingers across the wall. What kind of silent debate was raging inside her mind? This was going to be quite entertaining. “Do it.”
Caroline felt her way toward the doorknob and pressed in the lock. Jack leaned into her ear.
“We need to get something straight,” he whispered. “You will listen and you will obey, or you will be punished further. Do you understand?”
She closed her eyes. “Jack-”
He loved the way she choked out his name but he wanted a little more. He needed more. “You will refer to me as ‘Commander’ or ‘sir.’ Do you understand?”
Caroline bit her lip, one hand still pressed to the door.
“Do you understand?” he repeated.
“Yes,” she said softly.
“Yes, what?”
“Yes, sir.”
Jack toyed with her hair again, laughing when she shuddered. “Do you remember what I used to do to you when you were naughty?”
“Yes,” Caroline stammered. “I mean, yes, sir.”
Oh, this was going to be fun. “And what was that?”
“You would spank me,” she said, so softly he could barely hear her.
He smiled. “Look at me.”
Caroline blinked at him with damp eyes.
“Don’t cry,” he said. “We’re going to have fun. You’ll see.”
She tugged at her sweater. “I don’t-”
“You’ve been very bad. You know that, don’t you?”
“I – yes.”
Jack pulled her into the center of the room. Showtime. “Pull down your pants,” he said. “Slowly. I want to watch. Leave your underwear on for now.”
Her fingers shook as she reached for her waistband. “Sir,” she said. “I can’t-”
“You can. And you will,” he said, taking a seat on the couch. “Do it.”
She fumbled with the button on her pants. Jack laughed as she struggled with the zipper. “Pull them all the way off,” he said, watching her. “Very good.”
Caroline wasn’t entirely sold on the game, but she’d give in eventually. His cock stirred at her feeble resistance. He would enjoy the chase almost as much as the catch. “Come over here.” Jack patted his knee. “You know what to do.”
She laid over his lap. He stroked her backside. “Calm down,” he said. “I promise, you’ll enjoy it.” He tugged at her panties, pulling them down to her thighs.
“Jack-”
Oh, he couldn’t allow that. He swatted her hard, and she cried out. “That is not the proper way to address me.”
“Commander,” she whispered. “Please. Won’t your assistant hear us?”
He smiled again, rubbing her ass. “I assure you, he’s going to enjoy hearing you scream as much as I do.”
Caroline turned to him, the tears in her eyes spilling over. “Please don’t hurt me,” she said.
Fuck, he was turned on by her reticence. She loved to play hard to get. “Don’t worry, baby. I’m not going to do anything that you don’t deserve. That you don’t need.”
“Please-”
He smacked her again, harder this time. “Begging will get you nowhere.”
Jack pressed her head down, leaving her enough room to breathe but very little space to maneuver. He relished every blow, every cry, every swear she uttered, every tear she shed. She squirmed beneath him, struggling to get away, but he kept her in place. He had never hit her this hard before and knew he was causing her pain, but he didn’t care. She wasn’t telling him to stop.
He swatted her dozens of times in succession without a break, until she was hoarse from screaming and he w
as practically coming in his boxers. His fingers glided lazily over her ass, and she whimpered. She was bright red, the imprint of his palm still visible. Purple bruises were forming. She was struggling with her reaction to what they’d just done. With her loss of control. Jack smiled. He had done well indeed. He started to slide his fingers between her legs and she stiffened.
“Please,” she whispered. “Don’t.”
“I don’t think we’re done yet.” He scissored a hand between her thighs. “You’re dripping all over my pants. You loved that, didn’t you?”
Caroline stayed silent. Jack swatted her again with his free hand before sliding two fingers inside her. He waited. Let her tighten around them. Listened to her shallow breathing. To her unspoken requests. He pulled his fingers out, bringing them down to tease her clit.
She shifted toward him. “Please, Jack.”
So very disobedient. “What was that?”
“Please, Commander,” she said quickly. “Sir.”
Good but not good enough. “I’ll have to think of a more creative punishment for next time. I love when you get off on this.” He stroked her harder and she cried out, bucking against his hand in a silent but clear hint for him to keep going. She was right on the cusp. Jack withdrew his fingers. “I think that’s enough,” he said. “Don’t you?”
She struggled to lift her head up. “But-”
“You need to behave better in the future to earn your rewards. Understand?”
Caroline rubbed her eyes, her legs still trembling from his touch. She was close and he denied her.
“Yes, sir,” she said.
Enough of that game. He had time to play another. “Get up,” he directed.
“I can’t.” She winced when he squeezed her ass. “It hurts. I need a minute.”
Jack rubbed her back until she stopped shaking. “Better?” he asked.
“I think so.” She stood up clumsily.
“Put your pants back on,” he ordered.
Caroline pulled up her underwear, her eyes on the floor. Her cheeks were flushed, and giant wet drops of moisture fell onto her disheveled sweater.
Oh, please. Like she hadn’t loved every minute of what he’d done to her. “Major?” he said.
She kept her gaze riveted on her feet, her hands shaking as she buttoned her pants. “Yes, sir?”
“Look at me.”
She drew her head up, looking him square in the eyes, wiping away her remaining tears. Jack thought he saw a flash of shame but it was gone, replaced by what appeared to be…defiance? Anger? He couldn’t tell, but he had her exactly where he wanted her. He walked over to her, smiling as her breath hitched. He reached around and patted her ass. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”
Caroline barely concealed a wince. “N-no.”
She’d screwed up once more. That couldn’t be tolerated. “No, what?” he said.
“No, Commander.”
Jack smiled. He’d forgive her this one time since her correction had sounded so deferential. “Very nice. Would you like me to do that again soon?”
“No!”
An outburst he hadn’t expected. “Why not?”
“It hurt.”
“You didn’t tell me to stop.”
“I – no, sir. I didn’t.”
“I may want to use something other than my hand next time. I know you’ve always enjoyed that.”
Caroline took a deep breath. “I don’t-”
Her deference was fading. “What was that?”
She cleared her throat. “Whatever you want, sir.”
“Good.” Jack stroked the growing bulge in his crotch. “I think there’s one more thing you can do for me. Do you know what that is?”
“Jack-”
“What was that?”
She took a shaky breath. “Commander-”
“On your knees,” he said. “Now.”
Caroline sank to the floor, her hair obscuring her face from his view. He crouched down and tucked it behind her ear.
“You know you want this,” he said. She needed to learn how to behave herself. How to treat him properly.
“Please,” she whispered. “I don’t-”
“You know how much I love seeing those pretty lips on my cock.” He caressed her cheek. “You don’t want to get in any more trouble, do you?”
She gulped. “No, Commander.”
Jack guided her hand toward his zipper, ignoring the tears rolling down her cheeks. He was finally going to get what he wanted. What he deserved. And so was she.
“Good girl,” he said, moaning as Caroline brought her hand inside his boxers, pulling him out. He could imagine how it would feel once she placed her tongue on him, guiding him into her warm mouth. He resisted the urge to yank on her hair to get her to move faster.
She gazed up at him in a final plea for mercy. “Please don’t make me do this, Jack. I don’t want to.”
Her deference had vanished. That was unacceptable. He was done playing around. “What was that?” he snapped.
Caroline stumbled away from him, tumbling onto the carpet. “I don’t want to play this game.” She choked back a sob. “I don’t like the way you’re making me feel.”
“You don’t get a choice,” Jack said. “Get over here.”
She scrambled to her feet. “No,” she said. “I don’t want this. I don’t want you.” She straightened her shoulders. “I want you to leave me alone.”
He marched toward her as she moved to unlock the door.
“No more,” she said. “I’m finished.”
Jack took a good look at her, at the anguish in her eyes, and realized what had occurred. What he had done to her. “Caroline, wait-”
But she was already gone.
* * * * *
The phone rang and Jack pulled his head up, startled. It had to have rung more than once. He picked up before Schroeder burst in.
“What is it, Captain?” he asked.
“Major Gerard is here.”
Fuck. Of all the people in the world to come in at that moment, practically unannounced…why her? His cock was practically jumping out of his pants. Jesus fucking Christ. He’d been turned on by that dream. Really turned on. What the fuck was wrong with him? He widened his stance. “Do you know what she wants?”
“She says she needs to speak with you.”
Had something happened during therapy? Had there been another incident? Schroeder was never one to ask details and Jack got the distinct feeling that his assistant still had some serious personal issues with his wife. There was no time for him to adjust himself. He’d have to stay behind his desk to be safe. “Send her in.”
“Yes, sir.” Schroeder hung up.
Jack ran his hands through his hair. What the hell was going on in his head? Why was he having dreams about…that? He’d never done anything like that to her before, nor had she requested it. Everything they did over the course of their sex life was safe, sane, and consensual. He shuddered, picturing the look on her face when he demanded a blow job, trying to block out the realization that he coerced her into caving to his desires. She didn’t say no, didn’t tell him to stop, but it was clear from her body language that she didn’t enjoy any of it. The distress and fear in her eyes was nothing. The disappointment was worse.
He bossed her around anyway, driven by her resistance. His ability to use his position over her to his advantage. His gift for exploiting her feelings for him. His behavior was disgusting. Jack made a face, revolted with himself. He rearranged the papers on his desk into a neat pile, hoping his expression wouldn’t give him away. The expected knock at the door came and he tried to compose himself one final time.
“Come in,” he called.
Caroline walked inside. “Thank you for seeing me, Commander.”
“Jack,” he said hastily.
“I’m sorry?”
“Call me Jack.”
One corner of her mouth turned up. “Okay. Jack.”
What kind of magic could he con
jure to make that smile stay? He gestured toward the chair facing his desk. “Please sit down.”
“I won’t be here long.”
“Sit down anyway.”
She sat down on the couch. “Why don’t you join me over here?”
“No!”
Fuck, he’d practically shouted at her. He needed to get his shit together. The thoroughly perplexed expression on her face would have drawn a laugh from him under any other circumstance.
“Are you feeling all right?” she asked.
“I’m fine,” he said. “Please sit over here by me.”
She slouched into one of the leather chairs facing his desk. Maybe her devotion to their hierarchical divide was slipping. He hoped so. He hated that bullshit.
Jack stared at his hands for a moment. “You seem to be in a relatively decent mood.”
“I had a pretty cathartic talk with Natalie just now.”
He leaned back and crossed his legs, grateful he was able to move again. “That’s good. What brings you over here?”
Whatever easygoing vibe he’d caught from her faded quickly. “Natalie thinks we should have a joint session.”
That sounded like a terrible idea. “Excuse me?”
“I know,” she said. “I had the same reaction. But if I need to do this to get back to work, I’d appreciate it if you would help me out.”
She had to know that he would never say no to her. Or he hoped she did. “I’ll do whatever it takes to help you. When did she have in mind?”
“I assume some time next week. We can work around your schedule.”
The prospect of spending time with Caroline, even under unpleasant terms, was enough to make him giddy. “That sounds perfect.”
“There’s one more thing,” she said.
That couldn’t be good. “What’s that?”
“Natalie wants us to write something down before we come.”
“And what would that be?”
She rubbed her forehead. “She wants us to, uh, describe our biggest fears in our relationship.”
Dr. Haddad’s techniques were none too subtle. Jack chuckled. “She wants us to limit it to one? Might be kind of hard.”
Caroline covered her mouth, hiding a tiny grin. “I’m not sure she knows the extent to which we’ve had our issues, whether they’re with each other or ourselves.”
Phoenix (The Bellator Saga Book 4) Page 25