“What about your mom?”
“She ended up okay,” Remi tells her. “She seemed to like that farm a lot. We scraped together enough money to go see her once. She loved showing us around the orchard and the big, modern kitchen they had. All the fresh apples she could ever want, and room to bake all day. And she knew we were safe. She was finally happy, I think.”
“What happened to her? Did she stay in Virginia?”
“Yeah. Still there, I guess, in a way,” Colt says with a quiet sigh. “She requested her ashes to be scattered in the orchard. She died less than a year after Ann graduated. Breast cancer was the official cause, but I blame Frank for creating a life made up of fear and pain. She hung on just long enough to know we were all okay.”
Addie relinquishes her hold on mine and Remi’s hands and wraps her arms around Colt. “I am so sorry.”
He holds onto her, his jaw twisting with emotion. “No, we’re sorry. We’re sorry this is the mess you’re getting into with us.”
Remi moves closer and lays a hand on her back. “We’re pretty messed up, sweetheart.”
Addie loosens her grip on Colt and twists to look into Remi’s eyes. She shakes her head, her eyes shining with tears.
“No, you aren’t,” she says, looking at each of us in turn. “The situation you were in was fucked up. That’s not you. You’re good men. What happened here didn’t break you.”
“It came damn close,” I say, my chest tight, my throat burning with the knot of emotion stuck there.
“But you guys—you came together,” Addie says, her voice sweet and resolute. “You took care of each other. You mended each other. Do you see that?”
None of us say anything, but we do look at each other. Of course, we took care of one another. All we had was each other.
“You grew into strong men with kind hearts, even if you do growl at each other,” she adds.
Colt huffs and shakes his head at her comment, and I see Remi crack with a hint of a smile.
“I love your kind hearts,” she says. “And your gruffness. And the squabbling. I love you. Each one of you.”
I step up next to her and brush my fingers against her cheek. “You’re right — we survived. We made our way through. But you’re the one who’s shown us that life can be more than just surviving. That it can be beautiful, too. That’s all you, Addie.”
“He’s right.” Colt pulls her against his chest. “I’d go through all of this a million times if it means I end up with you in my arms.”
Addie’s breath catches as tears stream down her face and she reaches for me and Remi. We draw closer, and together the three us wrap Addie up in a hug.
We bow our heads to hers and hold her quietly, standing there for ages, the four of us as one.
There’s a mixture of sadness and relief between us, like a weight has been lifted, and the promise of happiness is in the air.
I squeeze Addie tighter, close my eyes, and let it all wash over me.
16
I BREATHE EASY FOR the first time in hours when the familiar sight of the cabin comes into view.
It was a fairly quiet ride up the mountain, all of us deep in thought, processing the things that were said at their childhood home — and the flood of feelings that came with it.
The guys insist on carrying in all my things. So now, directly in front of me, Wes’s hands are full of the bags of gifts and other things I’d purchased while out shopping with Natalie.
God, that trip to the little village shopping area with her seems like a lifetime ago. So much has happened since then.
Colt is leading the way to the cabin, with my big, heavy suitcase in tow.
Behind him is Remi, carrying my purse.
He looks ridiculous with my red hobo bag slung over his wide shoulder, the decorative leather fringe swaying as he walks with that brusque swagger of his. The sight makes me smile.
Since the guys insisted on carrying everything, my arms are empty when Colt opens the front door and Daisy flies out in a poof of golden hair and slobbery kisses.
I go to my knees on the frozen ground, cooing at her. She’s whining under her breath and bouncing into me until she tips me back on my ass. I giggle and wrap my hands around her as she burrows against me, as though she’s apologizing for knocking me over.
“You’re going to get soaking wet sitting in the snow in those jeans, city girl,” Remi calls over his shoulder from the doorway. “Get that pretty ass in here.”
“What do you say?” I whisper to Daisy. “You want me to stick around for a few days?”
She doesn’t know English, but she must know the pleading in my tone. Her tail thumps at the snow as I lift myself back to my feet. Daisy pads along by my side as I enter the cabin behind the guys.
They lift my bags and luggage onto the kitchen table, and suddenly it looks like a lot.
I probably could have managed with less for a vacation, but I was pretty much moving out of Jason’s when I grabbed my stuff from his place before coming out here, so the giant suitcase certainly came in handy at the time.
The guys are standing around the table, looking down at the luggage then glancing at me. I can’t begin to imagine how much the day’s toil has taken out of them — it couldn’t have been easy to take me out there and tell me their story.
It wasn’t the kind of history trip anyone likes taking, let alone a bunch of rugged, self-sufficient men like this. They’re used to just quietly dealing with the challenges of life, accepting what is, and toughing it out. For the three of them to share all of that with me was huge, and I know it.
Each of them apologized on the ride up here, claiming to not be good at all this emotional shit, as Wes put it, but I beg to differ. They may be the strong and silent type when it comes to the harder stuff in life, but I’ve never known a man to bare his soul to me that deeply, not like the three of them did back there.
I cast my eyes around the cabin. Although it’s small and cozy, it’s done just fine accommodating the four of us the last few weeks. But the furnishings are sparse, there are no closets, and I have no idea where to stash my stuff — much less unpack it.
If I even need to unpack. Perhaps I’m just going to be living out of my suitcase until after Christmas, when the guys will expect me to go home.
“So,” I begin, my voice wavering a little with the nervousness I feel inside, “where should I put my stuff?”
Colt doesn’t hesitate. “Everywhere. Put it fucking everywhere.”
A nervous laugh escapes me. “What?”
He sweeps his hand through the air. “I want your shit in every corner of this cabin. Treat it like it’s yours, sweetheart.”
Dammit. I thought I was done feeling like an emotional train wreck tonight. I love the way they’re all looking at me — exhilaration and desire in their eyes. Not just that dominant sexual hunger I’m so used to seeing on them. No, there’s something deeper there.
The thumping in my chest won’t settle down. I want this so badly. “Well, what if I miss my flight and get snowed in again? You’ll be stuck with me.”
“I fucking meant what I said earlier,” Colt tells me, his eyebrows knit with seriousness. “You can stay here, or we can help you get home when you’re ready to go. Whatever you need.”
I draw in a deep breath as I contemplate what to say. I want to ask them how long their invitation is good for. I want to know if this is just an extension of my vacation... or something more?
But I don’t think any of us are up for another big, heavy talk tonight, so I pat my bulging suitcase and try to lighten the mood with some humor.
“You might regret saying I can put my stuff everywhere after you see what’s in here,” I tell them.
“Why?” Wes asks. “Is it full of tampons?”
“No,” I say with a laugh before growing somber again. “Well, some, yeah, but... I have a lot of stuff. I kinda packed up my whole life in here.”
“Perfect,” Colt says. “Let’s unpack it here.”
And just like that, my breath is caught in my chest and there’s a lump in my throat.
I look at each of them in turn, wondering if they all feel the same way. There’s not even a hint of disagreement with Colt’s comment in any of their expressions.
“Really?” I manage to ask, trying to keep my voice steady. The words practically fall out, my heart pounding. “Because I was kinda hoping to stay a while.”
They don’t say anything, but Remi moves next to me and reaches for my suitcase.
He nudges my arm. “You mind?”
I step to the side to grant him access, not sure what he’s up to. His fingers have the suitcase unzipped in no time.
“Let’s see what we have here,” he says, flipping it open. “Oh, there’s your new stuff from Mackey’s — enough to weather one hell of a blizzard, that’s for sure... not that you’ll be wearing much at all.”
I give him a wry smile as he digs through my luggage. “I can’t be naked the entire time I’m here.”
“I beg to differ,” he says, pausing to run his eyes over me in that way that makes me shiver with anticipation. He holds up one of my skimpy, silken camisoles. “But this, this is going in my dresser, boys.”
“That’s okay,” Colt says, reaching past his brother. He moves some jeans out of the way and pulls out my new lambswool lined flannel shirt. “This one’s going in mine. You looked damn good in it... and nothing but it.”
“Fine, you guys want to play it like that?” Wes shoulders Remi aside. He gathers all of my bras and underwear, the delicate, colorful fabrics piled in his tattooed arms. “Addie’ll have to come see me every damn day, or she will be walking around here naked.”
Remi tilts his head. “I don’t see the problem with that.”
“Yeah.” Colt nods. “No arguments here — take ‘em. In fact, you could just throw them all outside and that’d be fine by me.”
“Noooo!” I yell, my hands diving for Wes.
He jumps out of my reach and heads over to his dresser. He opens the top drawer and throws a couple things on his bed then stuffs all of my bras and panties inside.
“There,” he says, turning back to me with that trademark sexy smirk of his. “You want to put on clothes, dirty girl? Then you’ll have to bring your naked ass over here every morning.”
I roll my eyes and shake my head with laughter. “You’re such a jerk.”
Wes rejoins us at the kitchen table, where his brothers are still picking items out of my suitcase, arguing about which pieces will go in which of their dressers.
My smile is so big, it’s making my cheeks sore. They’re rummaging through my luggage like it’s a competition, elbowing each other as they jostle for the rights to my clothes and personal items. I swallow down those tears that are trying to make their way up, despite — or maybe because of — the huge grin on my face.
“You guys?” I croak out, my stomach in a knot of apprehension and anticipation. I have to know.
They all pause for a second and look at me.
“How long do you want me around? Really.” I stare at them, my chest rising and falling nervously with each breath as they look to one another.
“Well,” Colt starts, but he doesn’t say anything else for a moment and I swear, my heart is going to explode if it pounds any harder. “That’s up to you,” he finally says.
I swallow hard. “How’s that?”
Their eyes dart to one another again before Wes answers. “You know... you could stay... or we could go. Whichever you want.”
“Go?” That thudding heart of mine comes to a complete stop in my chest, and my breath leaves me.
“Sure,” Remi says quietly. “We could all get a place in the city, if that’s where you want to be.”
I burst out in laughter. “Oh my God, what? You guys downtown? You’re funny.”
The three of them stare at me, no jesting humor in their expressions. “We’re serious,” Colt says.
My laughter turns into sniffles, and that’s when the tears begin to leak out, slow but steady.
They don’t think they’re good at all this emotional shit. But they’re so wrong. They might as well be writing it in the snow in five foot neon letters.
“You’d... you’d go to the city, for me?” I ask in disbelief.
Remi draws in a deep breath, and I can tell it was a momentous decision for him — for all of them—which only lends to the weight of this moment.
He nods. “Yeah. Wherever you’ll be happiest — that’s where we’ll be, too. If you’ll have us.”
I wipe the tears from my cheeks as I look at them in awe, searching for all the right words. But my heart is so full I can barely think straight. Finally, I manage to ask, “What do you say we just plan to get snowed in until spring, right here?”
Their lips curl into big grins and Wes blinks, his eyes shining before he looks away.
“Best fucking plan I’ve ever heard,” Colt says, pulling me into his arms.
17
AS NATALIE AND I PULL up to the cabin from a day of shopping, I turn Daisy’s Christmas present over in my hands. The thing is nearly the size of her head. I think she’ll love it.
Natalie turns the car off, and I tuck Daisy’s gift into one of the many, many bags occupying the backseat. It’s wrapped in plastic right now, but I’ll have to figure out how to wrap it and stash it in the fridge until we open presents tomorrow.
It was the guys’ idea to send me shopping with Natalie today. They claimed I needed to stock up on ‘woman stuff’. When I pressed them about exactly what that is, they couldn’t come up with anything.
Mmhmm. Woman stuff, my ass.
I know it was just a ruse to get me out of the cabin, especially since they insisted on staying here while Natalie and I went into town.
Remi and Colt come out of the cabin just as Natalie and I get out of the car. They’re mid-conversation and talking loudly.
“It’s served its purpose just fine, but Granddad didn’t build it to accommodate the kind of work we’re doing. If we’re talking about expanding, then we need a better setup,” Remi says as the two of them make their way toward us.
Colt nods. “Yeah, it’s kinda crowded as it is now, with three of us in there and the size of the pieces we’ve been doing.”
“We don’t have to stop using the workshop — we can turn it into an office,” Remi tells him.
Colt tips his head, conceding the point. “That’s true. And I think maybe Granddad would like the idea of us housing our business headquarters in there, since he’s the one who got us started on this.”
“He would. And we can build a new workshop — design it for what we need. We’ve got plenty of room over there.” Remi’s getting excited now, waving his hands and pointing as he talks. “Just clear out a few of the trees and level it off a little.”
The guys stroll over to the car, and I open the door to the backseat, eyeing the massive pile of shopping bags. I bend in to grab a couple bags just as a firm hand smacks my ass.
I straighten up with a jolt, and Colt sweeps me into a hug, his lips meeting mine.
“You were gone for ages,” he murmurs through our kiss. “I missed you.”
“Then don’t send me away next time,” I say, giving him a playful shove before turning to reach for the bags again.
He wraps his arms back around me. “You leave all that right there. Remi and I will get it.”
“Besides, there’s some bags in there we don’t want you poking your nose into,” Remi says, shooting a questioning look at Natalie. “Right?”
She nods with a sly grin. “Yes. Don’t let her carry any of the blue or white bags.”
I shoot Natalie a narrow look over the hood of the car. “Smooth. Real sneaky.”
Natalie turns her hands up and feigns innocence. “What?”
I point an accusatory finger at her. “You know she left me with Tank in the middle of a women’s clothing store and told me to keep him occupied so she could go grab hi
s Christmas presents?”
Natalie grins and shrugs unapologetically. “What can I say? I had a super-secret mission to complete.”
“Riiight. Meanwhile, I’m standing there with Tank in the sleepwear section, asking his opinion about pajamas. You know how awkward that was?”
Colt and Natalie laugh, but Remi throws his hands up. “I keep telling you, you don’t need pajamas. You never actually wear them to bed, anyway.”
“And I keep telling you, my pajamas aren’t for wearing to bed, they’re just for... wearing... like, whenever. At bedtime. Or when I wake up. Before I put real clothes on.”
“That’s what sweatpants are for,” Remi tells me. “You don’t need a special outfit to wear for lounging around.”
“Dude.” Colt slaps his brother on the chest. “Don’t tell her to put on sweatpants. Did you see those skimpy little ass-hugging things she had on yesterday? If that’s what she wants to wear around the cabin, Addie can pick out all the fucking pajamas she wants.”
I shake my head with a laugh as I reach into the car and quickly snatch a couple bags. Remi tries to take them from me, but I swat his hand away.
“Nope!” I admonish. “I’m carrying these. Because Natalie isn’t the only one with super-secret surprises.”
The guys gather up the rest of the bags, and we all trudge toward the cabin, laden down with all sorts of goodies.
The last few days up here in the woods with my men have been wonderful. I’m so damn happy, I think my heart might explode.
As we walk, I look around, drinking in the scenery anew. The beautiful views, the cabin, the rustic buildings dotting the property — my home now. It feels like a fairytale come true.
A lot of my questions were answered the other day, between what the guys said during the situation with Jason at the resort and the things they opened up about during the heartbreaking visit to their childhood home.
I was an emotional mess after that, but there was a peace that came with it, too. Jason is gone from my life for good, and I finally know the things the guys have been afraid to share with me.
They were scared it would chase me away, that I’d think of them as damaged and broken, but they were wrong — instead, I see how truly brave and strong they’ve been their whole lives.
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