Being in Clay’s arms feels like coming home. He’s got them wrapped around me tightly and I wrap mine around him. I don’t want to let go, not now, not ever. His lips taste so sweet, and his body feels strong and safe. His hands reach down and grab my ass, pulling me up so that I’m straddling him. My housecoat has fallen open and I’m completely naked on top of him. He slides it over my shoulders and then slips his hands down my chest to grab my tits. I close my eyes and enjoy the strong, soft touch of his hands all over me. My heart flutters every time he touches me. I feel like my chest is going to explode, my heart is overflowing. He wants me! Only me! I open my eyes and look at him. At his dark eyes as they stare back at me. There’s a softness in them that I haven’t seen before. Emma was right. The way he looks at me, it has to be real. I can’t believe it wouldn’t be. I can feel the emotion emanating from me as we look at each other, drink each other in. I stand up and take his hand in mine, leading him to my bedroom. I turn around and slip my hands under his shirt, helping him slide it overhead. I take a second to run my fingers all over his chiseled chest, his abs, back up around his neck. He leans down and kisses me softly, and then harder. His hand is on the small of my back and I feel myself melting into him. My hands search for his fly, trying to unbutton him as our lips are locked together. His hands reach down to help me and then we’re both naked. He pushes me backwards onto the bed and I feel the weight of his body on top of me. It feels good, so good to be here with him. He glances over to the side and back at me, grinning. “I see you went with Girl’s Best Friend,” he says. “A personal favourite of mine.” I look over and feel my cheeks burn when I see my prescription vibrator, proudly on display on my bedside table. Exactly where I put it right after I threw it against the wall the first day I got it. He grins and leans over to grab it. He turns it on and then slides over beside me, onto his side. Our legs are intertwined and he uses his leg to spread mine open. He brings the vibrator down towards my mound and around my lips, teasing me. The vibrations are strong, and I lean back into the bed to get used to them. His lips find my breasts and he starts sucking on my nipples while the vibrator moves closer and closer to my slit. Every flick of his tongue over my rock hard nipples sends a direct shock towards my centre. I never knew they could be so sensitive. He shifts his weight and moves to the other one, and then finally the vibrator moves up towards my bud. He circles my clit with it and turns the vibrations on higher. The electric warmth inside me starts growing quickly. I’ve never experienced anything like this and before I know it my orgasm surprises me and explodes from my centre outwards. My limbs contract and my back arches and I hear Clay moaning with me. Shockwaves of pleasure course through my entire body as he plays with my clit. Finally my body relaxes and he moves the vibrator away from my ultra sensitive bud. I open my eyes and look at him in shock. Maybe it is a Girl’s Best Friend. “I’ll go grab a condom, I need to be inside you,” he says as he shifts his weight towards the side of the bed. “Are you.. Have you been tested? Do you need a condom? I’m on the pill.” I’m surprising myself saying that. He looks at me with his dark eyes wide open. “Yeah I was tested last week, right after I met you. Are you sure?” In response I put my arms around him and wrap my legs around him. He shifts his weight on top of me and I can feel his hard cock pressed against my hipbone. The bare, hot skin of it burns against me and I can feel myself getting wetter. He takes his cock in his hand and places it against my opening. My pussy is tight and wet from my orgasm. He starts pushing himself into me and my mouth falls open. I feel myself stretch to accommodate his cock and I moan as he pushes it deeper and deeper inside me. It feels so good to be filled with him, to feel his skin against mine. I never thought it would make such a difference. His thrusts are long and deep, and I can feel every ridge, every vein of his cock rubbing against my walls. We’re truly connected now. Clay’s eyes are closed and his mouth is open in a small ‘o’ as he enters me. He exhales slowly when his balls press up against me and I shift my hips to let him get a tiny bit deeper. His long, slow thrusts travel straight through me and I feel myself contract around him. His weight is on me and I can feel his breath on my shoulder as he grunts with every hard thrust. My entire body is screaming with me and I erupt into another orgasm. The tightening and contracting of my walls around his cock make him even harder. He groans and thrusts harder, faster until I can feel his cock pumping his seed into me. I can’t stop panting, it feels so good to have him inside me like this. I can feel every movement of his, I can feel the exact moment his orgasm fills me. Clay lays against me and our sticky, sweaty skin connects us everywhere. He rolls over beside me and onto his back, extending an arm for my head to rest on his shoulder. We stay like that for a few moments, saying nothing to each other. I can feel every breath and every heartbeat of his. I don’t want to move. “I wasn’t expecting that,” he says. “Neither was I, but I liked it.” He turns his head and wraps his other arm around me, tenderly kissing me once again. It feels good to next to him. My heart twinges when I think of his plans to move to Seattle, and I know that we can’t keep avoiding the topic. For now I just rest in his arms. Chapter 40 – Clay
I wake up and realise I’d fallen asleep. Val is sleeping next to me and has the most peaceful look on her face. Her arm is flung across my chest and I run my fingertips along the length of it. She shivers and wakes up gently. I turn my head to look at the bedside clock. “What time is it?” she asks sleepily. “It’s 6:30pm,” I respond. “I’m starving.” Her voice is muffled into my shoulder “What else is new,” I say laughing. “You’re always hungry.” She groans in response. “So am I. We should get up.” I follow her to the bathroom and we jump in the shower together. I grab a loofah and soap it up before turning towards Val. I start with her back and shoulders, moving down over her perfect ass. The suds cover her body and I turn her around. I scrub her collarbone down to her chest, circling her breasts and massaging them as I move over her stomach. I move the loofah over her mound, washing between her legs and then lean down to wash the rest of her. She places a small foot on my leg and I soap it up. I love the way she giggles when it tickles her. She rinses off and takes the loofah from me. It feels so good, so intimate to be in the shower here with her. She runs her hands over me, making sure to wash my body from head to toe. It feels like a new beginning. If I thought we were connected before, this afternoon has shown me what true intimacy feels like. When we’re clean we both rinse off again and step out of the shower. The steam fills the bathroom and the mirror fogs up as soon as we step out. Val hands me a towel and I dry myself. Something so simple as showering together has never made me feel as good. I like being around her, being close enough to touch, being comfortable enough with each other to wash together. I didn’t think I wanted it until I almost lost it. We get dressed quietly, sneaking glances at each other. When she walks by with those tight jeans on I can’t resist smacking her ass. She giggles playfully. “Now now, Clay. None of that. It’s food time.” We head out together into the fresh evening air. It’s nice to get out, to walk together. I like having her beside me when we walk down the street. I feel proud to be the man next to her. I see how all the guys check her out and then glance at me and it makes my chest swell up with pride to be the one she chose. I grab her hand in mind and it fits perfectly as we stroll around the corner to the local pasta place. “Another gem,” Val says proudly when we get there. “Doesn’t look like much but they make all their own pasta fresh in-house and have the best meatballs you’ll ever taste.” “I think I have the best meatballs you’ll ever taste, but we can leave that open to discussion,” I respond. She laughs and elbows me lightly in the ribs. I’ll say anything to make her laugh, to see how it brightens her whole face. I love when she finds something really funny and her whole body shakes with laughter in the most infectious way possible. It’s cute and sexy and endearing at the same time. I smile and open the door to the restaurant for her, happy to be here together. We sit down at the table
and I’m finding it hard to focus on the menu. I keep thinking about the way it felt to be inside her, to feel the real her like that. The raw her. She catches me staring at her and sticks her tongue out at me. The waiter reappears and Val orders first. “I’ll have the spaghetti and meatballs. Can you make it extra saucy please?” I almost choke on my water and she glances over at me with laughter in her eyes. How is she keeping a straight face! The waiter doesn’t even blink, “Certainly, miss. And for you, sir?” “I’ll have the same,” I squeak out. The waiter walks away and Val breaks into that silent, shaking laughter that I love so much. Her shoulders are shaking up and down and her hand is covering her mouth. The way her face scrunches is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Just when we’ve recovered from our laughter I hear a familiar voice behind me. My heart drops when I hear the overly sultry, honey-sweet voice that reeled me in so many years ago. “Well if it isn’t Clay O’Neill,” the voice says, amused. “Is it Doctor Clay O’Neill by now? And you have a new plaything! How cute.” I turn around and see her. She looks just like she did eight years ago, curvy and gorgeous with sex dripping out of every pore. The only difference is that this time it doesn’t turn me on. If anything, it turns me off completely and my blood runs cold. She’s tall with jet black hair. It’s perfectly straight and falls to her waist. Her features are sharp. She’s beautiful, but looking at her I feel nothing but disgust. She does nothing for me except fill me with dread. Val is looking at her and then me, waiting for an explanation. “Caroline. This is Val and she’s not my plaything.” I know my voice is excessively curt. Caroline extends a long hand and I see the vermillion polish on the end of her fingers, each nail sharpened to a point. Claws, I think. Seems appropriate. Val reaches up and shakes her hand gently and I resist the impulse to shudder when the two of them touch. “It’s nice to meet you,” Val says politely. I can’t help but feel like her voice is a breath of fresh air after the honeyed, sticky sweetness of Caroline’s drawl. “So what stories has Clay here been telling you. I’m sure he’s mentioned me,” she says with a sly smile playing over her lips. She looks at me and raises a thin eyebrow. “No, actually, he hasn’t. How do you guys know each other?” “Oh, you know,” Caroline responds casually, waving her claws in the air by her head. She uses her hand to move her long hair behind her shoulder. “We dated for a few years, back when he was a stripper.” Val’s eyes widen and she looks at me in shock. I glance at Caroline and open my mouth to tell her to be quiet. She continues before I can jump in. “What, he didn’t tell you? Yeah, he didn’t tell me either. Then I found out he had girls all over him. It’s what broke us up. He just couldn’t keep his hands to himself.” Val’s jaw is hanging open and she closes it, only to let it fall open again. Her eyes are burning through me, I can see the betrayal in them. “Val..” I start. “Don’t listen to her. It’s not true.” Caroline shifts her hips and places a hand on my shoulder. I flinch away.
“Why shouldn’t she listen, Clay. You afraid she’ll find out what kind of guy you really are?”
She laughs an emotionless laugh and then waves at us both before catwalking out of the restaurant.
Chapter 41 – Valerie
I watch as that woman tosses a grenade at our table and then casually struts out the door. My mind is moving at a hundred miles an hour. Stripper!? Couldn’t keep his hands to himself!? I look across the table at the man on the other side and realise I know absolutely nothing about him. For the second time today I feel like an absolute fool. I’ve let myself be carried away by my own emotion and I’ve put myself in this position. Here I am, completely infatuated with a man who has not only evidently slept with half of New York, but who just tells me what I want to hear to get between my legs. Hot pangs of jealousy shoot through me. My cheeks are burning and my heart feels completely hollow. How could I do this to myself. I knew this morning, after I learned he’d slept with my best friend that I should just forget about him. I should have just listened to myself. Emma was probably just feeling sorry for me and telling me to talk to him to make me feel better. I should never have wasted my time with him, and I definitely should have walked away when I had the chance. Who do I think I am, having a fling with a hot doctor?! Of course he’s running around with every girl he can. I can’t believe I let him in when he showed up at my door this afternoon. My cheeks burn when I think about our sex this afternoon, about the intimacy of the shower. I’m an idiot. The woman’s words are playing on repeat in my head. They were together. They broke up because he couldn’t keep his hands to himself. He was saying it’s not true but of course he would say that. We’ve just spent the past couple weeks spending every possible moment together and he somehow forgot to mention he used to be a STRIPPER?? I don’t exactly have a problem with it, a part of me might even be turned on by the thought. But as I look at him across the table from me I can’t help but feel like I’ve been lied to. I’ve been played. I don’t know anything about him and I’ve opened up to him completely. “Val, I can explain. She was lying.” “Did you used to be a stripper?” He pauses, his eyes burning into me. He opens his mouth and answers slowly. “Yes, it’s what put me through medical school.” “And when we were talking about our pasts, you didn’t think that was worth mentioning?” “I…” I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to hear his explanation, his excuse, his way of weaselling his way back into my bed. My bed. I’ve let myself get carried away by the promise of the orgasms I’ve so desperately wanted for so many years. He couldn’t even tell me that he dated a girl before! All he’s ever told me is that he had a “rule” to not date women long term to focus on his career, and that he was “breaking” that rule for me. What a load of horseshit. I can’t believe I’ve been so blind. I stand up and shake my head. “I can’t do this, Clay.” “Val, wait!” His eyes are pleading, his arms raised in supplication towards me. “I can explain, just give me a second.” “I don’t want to hear any more of your explanations!” People in the restaurant are staring at us and for once I don’t give a shit. “All you’ve done since this morning is backpedal and explain and wheel and deal your way back into my heart. Well we’re done. You’re done.” His dark eyes are brimming with tears, boring through me like lasers. It’s all an act. I don’t know why he bothers. He could have any girl he chooses, why go through all this trouble with me. I look at him one more time, from head to toe. His t-shirt is tight across his muscled chest, forearms strong and vascular. His neck is red, veins popping out in anger. I can see his pulse in them, pumping his blood at a fast pace. Chiseled jaw with a bit of stubble and those eyes that have captivated me since I walked into his office. Not anymore. No orgasm is worth this amount of hurt. I follow in the other woman’s footsteps and stumble out the door. It’s all I can do to make it to my apartment before I break down. Hot tears of lava stream down my face, burning trails down my cheeks. I opened up to him, gave myself up to him in body, mind… and heart. Now I realise none of it was real. He’s an expert at telling me what I want to hear. I must have been amusing to him, the girl who can’t come who’s now completely infatuated with him. God, I feel like an idiot. With the door closed and locked behind me I crumple onto the floor. Once again I’m in my apartment, destroyed. My arms and legs feel weak, I’m dizzy with pain. The blurry outlines of my furniture are barely visible through my tear-filled eyes and I can’t help but cry even harder. My heart is shattered and I sit on the floor as I try to understand what just happened. Emma was right to walk away from him this morning, to call him a user. He’s played me and now he’ll move onto the next girl and play her too. He’ll go on “breaking his rules” whenever he wants to get in someone’s bed. Deep breaths. I need to calm down. One thing is for sure, it won’t be my bed. That thought doesn’t make me feel better, it might even be making me feel worse. The searing pain in my chest isn’t subsiding, I can’t move from my spot on the floor. I was falling for him and now it’s like the curtain has been lifted. He’s been like a drug to me, wal
tzing into my life and sweeping me off my feet, showing me pleasure like I’ve never experienced. Sobs rake through my body, making my shoulders shake as the tears fall from my eyes. I should have known I didn’t deserve to feel that kind of happiness. Chapter 42 – Clay
Second Chance: A Rockstar Romance in North Korea Page 22