by L. Sprague de Camp;Frederik Pohl;David Drake;S. M. Stirling;Alexei
“Hey!” said Padway. The man paused. With great concentration Padway translated his request into what he hoped was Vulgar Latin.
The man thought, and said he didn’t know.
Padway started to turn elsewhere. But the seller of beads called to another hawker: “Marco! The gentleman wants to find a police agent.”
“The gentleman is brave. He is also crazy,” replied Marco.
The bead-seller laughed. So did several people. Padway grinned a little; the people were human if not very helpful, He said: “Please, I—really—want—to—know.”
The second hawker, who had a tray full of brass knick-knacks tied around his neck, shrugged. He rattled off a paragraph that Padway could not follow.
Padway slowly asked the bead-seller: “What did he say?”
“He said he didn’t know,” replied the bead-seller. “I don’t know either.”
Padway started to walk off. The bead-seller called after him: “Mister.”
“Yes?”
“Did you mean an agent of the municipal prefect?”
“Yes.”
“Marco, where can the gentleman find an agent of the municipal prefect?”
“I don’t know,” said Marco.
The bead-seller shrugged. “Sorry, I don’t know either.”
If this were twentieth-century Rome, there would be no difficulty about finding a cop. And not even Benny the Moose could make a whole city change its language. So he must be in (a) a movie set, (b) ancient Rome (the Tancredi hypothesis), or (c) a figment of his imagination.
He started walking. Talking was too much of a strain.
It was not long before any lingering hopes about a movie set were dashed by the discovery that this alleged ancient city stretched for miles in all directions, and that its street plan was quite different from that of modern Rome. Padway found his little pocket map nearly useless.
The signs on the shops were in intelligible classical Latin. The spelling had remained as in Caesar’s time, if the pronunciation had not.
The streets were narrow, and for the most part not very crowded. The town had a drowsy, shabby-genteel, rundown personality, like that of Philadelphia.
At one relatively busy intersection Padway watched a man on a horse direct traffic. He would hold up a hand to stop an oxcart, and beckon a sedan chair across. The man wore a gaudily striped shirt and leather trousers. He looked like a central or northern European rather than an Italian.
Padway leaned against a wall, listening. A man would say a sentence just too fast for him to catch. It was like having your hook nibbled but never taken. By terrific concentration, Padway forced himself to think in Latin. He mixed his cases and numbers, but as long as he confined himself to simple sentences he did not have too much trouble with vocabulary.
A couple of small boys were watching him. When he looked at them they giggled and raced off.
It reminded Padway of those United States Government projects for the restoration of Colonial towns, like Williamsburg. But this looked like the real thing. No restoration included all the dirt and disease, the insults and altercations, that Padway had seen and heard in an hour’s walk.
Only two hypotheses remained: delirium and time-slip. Delirium now seemed the less probable. He would act on the assumption that things were in fact what they seemed.
He couldn’t stand there indefinitely. He’d have to ask questions and get himself oriented. The idea gave him gooseflesh. He had a phobia about accosting strangers. Twice he opened his mouth, but his glottis closed up tight with stage fright.
Come on, Padway, get a grip on yourself. “I beg your pardon, but could you tell me the date?”
The man addressed, a mild-looking person with a loaf of bread under his arm, stopped and looked blank. “Qui’ e’? What is it?”
“I said, could you tell me the date?”
The man frowned. Was he going to be nasty? But all he said was, “Non compr’ endo.” Padway tried again, speaking very slowly. The man repeated that he did not understand.
Padway fumbled for his date-book and pencil. He wrote his request on a page of the date-book, and held the thing up.
The man peered at it, moving his lips. His face cleared. “Oh, you want to know the date?” said he.
“Sic, the date.”
The man rattled a long sentence at him. It might as well have been in Trabresh. Padway waved his hands despairingly, crying, “Lento!”
The man backed up and started over. “I said I understood you, and I thought it was October 9th, but I wasn’t sure because I couldn’t remember whether my mother’s wedding anniversary came three days ago or four.”
“What year?”
“What year?”
“Sic, what year?”
“Twelve eighty-eight Anno Urbis Conditae.”
It was Padway’s turn to be puzzled. “Please, what is that in the Christian era?”
“You mean, how many years since the birth of Christ?”
“Hoc ille—that’s right.”
“Well, now—I don’t know; five hundred and something. Better ask a priest, stranger.”
“I will,” said Padway. “Thank you.”
“It’s nothing,” said the man, and went about his business. Padway’s knees were weak, though the man hadn’t bitten him, and had answered his question in a civil enough manner. But it sounded as though Padway, who was a peaceable man, had not picked a very peaceable period.
What was he to do? Well, what would any sensible man do under the circumstances? He’d have to find a place to sleep and a method of making a living. He was a little startled when he realized how quickly he had accepted the Tancredi theory as a working hypothesis.
He strolled up an alley to be out of sight and began going through his pockets. The roll of Italian bank notes would be about as useful as a broken five-cent mousetrap. No, even less; you might be able to fix a mousetrap. A book of American Express traveler’s checks, a Roman street-car transfer, an Illinois driver’s license, a leather case full of keys—all ditto. His pen, pencil, and lighter would be useful as long as ink, leads, and lighter fuel held out. His pocketknife and his watch would undoubtedly fetch good prices, but he wanted to hang onto them as long as he could.
He counted the fistful of small change. There were just twenty coins, beginning with four ten-lire silver cartwheels. They added up to forty-nine lire, eight centesimi, or about five dollars. The silver and bronze should be exchangeable. As for the nickel fifty-centesimo and twenty-centesimo pieces, he’d have to see. He started walking again.
He stopped before an establishment that advertised itself as that of S. Dentatus, goldsmith and money changer. He took a deep breath and went in.
S. Dentatus had a face rather like that of a frog. Padway laid out his change and said: “I…I should like to change this into local money, please.” As usual he had to repeat the sentence to make himself understood.
S. Dentatus blinked at the coins. He picked them up, one by one, and scratched at them a little with a pointed instrument. “Where do these—you—come from?” he finally croaked.
“America.”
“Never heard of it.”
“It is a long way off.”
“Hm-m-m. What are these made of? Tin?” The money changer indicated the four nickel coins.
“Nickel.”
“What’s that? Some funny metal they have in your country?”
“Hoc ille.”
“What’s it worth?”
Padway thought for a second of trying to put a fantastically high value on the coins. While he was working up his courage, S. Dentatus interrupted his thoughts:
“It doesn’t matter, because I wouldn’t touch the stuff. There wouldn’t be any market for it. But these other pieces—let’s see—” He got out a balance and weighed the bronze coins, and then the silver coins. He pushed counters up and down the grooves of a little bronze abacus, and said: “They’re worth just under one solidus. Give you a solidus even for them.
”
Padway didn’t answer immediately. Eventually he’d have to take what was offered, as he hated the idea of bargaining and didn’t know the values of the current money. But to save his face he had to appear to consider the offer carefully.
A man stepped up to the counter beside him. He was a heavy, ruddy man with a flaring brown mustache and his hair in a long or Ginger Rogers bob. He wore a linen blouse and long leather pants. He grinned at Padway, and reeled off: “Ho, frijond, habais faurthei! Alai skalljans sind waidedjans.”
Oh, Lord, another language! Padway answered: “I…I am sorry, but I do not understand.”
The man’s face fell a little; he dropped into Latin: “Sorry, thought you were from the Chersonese, from your clothes. I couldn’t stand around and watch a fellow Goth swindled without saying anything, ha, ha!”
The Goth’s loud, explosive laugh made Padway jump a little; he hoped nobody noticed. “I appreciate that. What is this stuff worth?”
“What has he offered you?” Padway told him. “Well,” said the man, “even I can see that you’re being hornswoggled. You give him a fair rate, Sextus, or I’ll make you eat your own stock. That would be funny, ha, ha!”
S. Dentatus sighed resignedly. “Oh, very well, a solidus and a half. How am I to live, with you fellows interfering with legitimate business all the time? That would be, at the current rate of exchange, one solidus thirty-one sesterces.”
“What is this about a rate of exchange?” asked Padway.
The Goth answered: “The gold-silver rate. Gold has been going down the last few months.”
Padway said: “I think I will take it all in silver.”
While Dentatus sourly counted out ninety-three sesterces, the Goth asked: “Where do you come from? Somewhere up in the Hunnish country?”
“No,” said Padway, “a place farther than that, called America. You have never heard of it, have you?”
“No. Well now, that’s interesting. I’m glad I met you, young fellow. It’ll give me something to tell the wife about. She thinks I head for the nearest brothel every time I come to town, ha, ha!” He fumbled in his handbag and brought out a large gold ring and an unfaceted gem. “Sextus, this thing came out of its setting again. Fix it up, will you? And no substitutions, mind.”
As they went out the Goth spoke to Padway in a lowered voice. “The real reason I’m glad to come to town is that somebody put a curse on my house.”
“A curse? What kind of a curse?”
The Goth nodded solemnly. “A shortness-of-breath curse. When I’m home I can’t breathe. I go around like this—” He gasped asthmatically. “But as soon as I get away from home I’m all right. And I think I know who did it.”
“Who?”
“I foreclosed a couple of mortgages last year. I can’t prove anything against the former owners, but—” He winked ponderously at Padway.
“Tell me,” said Padway, “do you keep animals in your house?”
“Couple of dogs. There’s the stock, of course, but we don’t let them in the house. Though a shoat got in yesterday and ran away with one of my shoes. Had to chase it all over the damned farm. I must have been a sight, ha, ha!”
“Well,” said Padway, “try keeping the dogs outside all the time and having your place well swept every day. That might stop your—uh—wheezing.”
“Now, that’s interesting. You really think it would?”
“I do not know. Some people get the shortness of breath from dog hairs. Try it for a couple of months and see.”
“I still think it’s a curse, young fellow, but I’ll try your scheme. I’ve tried everything from a couple of Greek physicians to one of St. Ignatius’ teeth, and none of them works.” He hesitated. “If you don’t mind, what were you in your own country?”
Padway thought quickly, then remembered the few acres he owned in down-state Illinois. “I had a farm,” he said.
“That’s fine,” roared the Goth, clapping Padway on the back with staggering force. I’m a friendly soul but I don’t want to get mixed up with people too far above or below my own class, ha, ha! My name is Nevitta; Nevitta Gummund’s son. If you’re passing up the Flaminian Way sometime, drop in. My place is about eight miles north of here.”
“Thanks. My name is Martin Padway. Where would be a good place to rent a room?”
“That depends. If I didn’t want to spend too much money I’d pick a place farther down the river. Plenty of boarding houses over toward the Viminal Hill. Say, I’m in no hurry; I’ll help you look.” He whistled sharply and called: “Hermann, hiri her!”
Hermann, who was dressed much like his master, got up off the curb and trotted down the street leading two horses, his leather pants making a distinctive flop-flop as he ran.
Nevitta set out a brisk walk, Hermann leading the horses behind. Nevitta said: “What did you say your name was?”
“Martin Padway—Martinus is good enough.” (Padway properly pronounced it Marteeno.)
Padway did not want to impose on Nevitta’s good nature, but he wanted the most useful information he could get. He thought a minute, then asked: “Could you give me the names of a few people in Rome, lawyers and physicians and such, to go to when I need them?”
“Sure. If you want a lawyer specializing in cases involving foreigners, Valerius Mummius is your man. His office is alongside of the Aemilian Basilica. For a physician try my friend Leo Vekkos. He’s a good fellow as Greeks go. But personally I think the relic of a good Arian saint like Asterius is as effective as all their herbs and potations.”
“It probably is at that,” said Padway. He wrote the names and addresses in his date-book. “How about a banker?”
“I don’t have much truck with them; hate the idea of getting in debt. But if you want the name of one, there’s Thomasus the Syrian, near the Aemilian Bridge. Keep your eyes open if you deal with him.”
“Why, isn’t he honest?”
“Thomasus? Sure he’s honest. You just have to watch him, that’s all. Here, this looks like a place you could stay.” Nevitta pounded on the door, which was opened by a frowsy superintendent.
This man had a room, yes. It was small and ill-lighted. It smelled. But then so did all of Rome. The superintendent wanted seven sesterces a day.
“Offer him half,” said Nevitta to Padway in a stage whisper.
Padway did. The superintendent acted as bored by the ensuing haggling as Padway was. Padway got the room for five sesterces.
Nevitta squeezed Padway’s hand in his large red paw. “Don’t forget, Martinus, come see me some time. I always like to hear a man who speaks Latin with a worse accent than mine, ha, ha!” He and Hermann mounted and trotted off.
Padway hated to see them go. But Nevitta had his own business to tend to. Padway watched the stocky figure round a corner, then entered the gloomy, creaking boarding house.
CHAPTER II
Padway awoke early with a bad taste in his mouth, and a stomach that seemed to have some grasshopper in its ancestry. Perhaps that was the dinner he’d eaten—not bad, but unfamiliar—consisting mainly of stew smothered in leeks. The restaurateur must have wondered when Padway made plucking motions at the table top; he was unthinkingly trying to pick up a knife and fork that weren’t there.
One might very well sleep badly the first night on a bed consisting merely of a straw-stuffed mattress. And it had cost him an extra sesterce a day, too. An itch made him pull up his undershirt. Sure enough, a row of red spots on his midriff showed that he had not, after all, slept alone.
He got up and washed with the soap he had bought the previous evening. He had been pleasantly surprised to find that soap had already been invented. But when he broke a piece off the cake, which resembled a slightly decayed pumpkin pie, he found that the inside was soft and gooey because of incomplete potash-soda metathesis. Moreover, the soap was so alkaline that the thought he might as well have cleaned his hands and face by sandpapering.
Then he made a determined effort to shave
with olive oil and a sixth-century razor. The process was so painful that he wondered if it mightn’t be better to let nature take its course.
He was in a tight fix, he knew. His money would last about a week—with care, perhaps a little longer.
If a man knew he was going to be whisked back into the past, he would load himself down with all sorts of useful junk in preparation, an encyclopedia, texts on metallurgy, mathematics, and medicine, a slide rule, and so forth. And a gun, with plenty of ammunition.
But Padway had no gun, no encyclopedia, nothing but what an ordinary twentieth-century man carries in his pockets. Oh, a little more, because he’d been traveling at the time: such useful things as the traveler’s checks, a hopelessly anachronistic street map, and his passport.
And he had his wits. He’d need them.
The problem was to find a way of using his twentieth-century knowledge that would support him without getting him into trouble. You couldn’t, for example, set out to build an automobile. It would take several lifetimes to collect the necessary materials, and several more to learn how to handle them and to worry them into the proper form. Not to mention the question of fuel.
The air was fairly warm, and he thought of leaving his hat and vest in the room. But the door had the simplest kind of ward lock, with a bronze key big enough to be presented by a mayor to a visiting dignitary. Padway was sure he could pick the lock with a knife blade. So he took all his clothes along. He went back to the same restaurant for breakfast. The place had a sign over the counter reading, “religious arguments not allowed.” Padway asked the proprietor how to get to the address of Thomasus the Syrian.
The man said: “You follow along Long Street down to the Arch of Constantine, and then New Street to the Julian Basilica, and then you turn left onto Tuscan Street, and—” and so on.
Padway made him repeat it twice. Even so, it took most of the morning to find his objective. His walk took him past the Forum area, full of temples, most of whose columns had been removed for use in the five big and thirty-odd little churches scattered around the city. The temples looked pathetic, like a Park Avenue doorman bereft of his pants.