by Shea,Lisa
Reynald finished his mouthful of chicken before answering. “We ran into Simon,” he explained between bites. “Simon said that he would see her home again when she was ready, and she seemed most interested in taking him up on his offer.”
Sarah’s temper flared. “You left Simon in her care?” she snapped with heat.
All eyes swiveled to her, and Sarah’s mother chuckled in amusement. “I rather think Rachel is in Simon’s care, my dear. We all know Rachel is capable enough of handling the world on her own. If any issue were to arise on their trip home, surely you trust Simon to act as guard? I rather thought you liked him, despite the way things ended between you two.”
Confusion swept over her. “Yes, of course,” she quietly stammered. “Simon is sweet; I trust him completely.” She looked down at her plate, mixing the peas around absently with her knife.
She heard her mother ask Reynald for details of the fair, and the conversation swirled on around her. Her emotions rolled in a twisted maelstrom. The moment dinner was over, she walked over to the sitting room, moving to stare out the window.
Footsteps came in behind her, then stopped a few feet away. Reynald’s voice was contrite. “I am sorry,” he softly offered. “I did not think there was any harm in -”
Sarah waved her hand. “No, of course, you are right,” she wearily agreed. “Simon is an upstanding man and would never hurt Rachel. I imagine she was most insistent that she wanted to be with him instead.”
She turned to see Reynald nodding. “Indeed she was, and I did not feel it was my place to gainsay her wishes.” His face creased. “However, if it has upset you so -”
Sarah sighed, sitting on the fabric-topped bench which had only a few hours ago held a gentle musician. “I am not sure exactly why I am upset,” she slowly admitted. “Certainly, I have no claim on him. I have been hoping for him to find a wonderful woman for many months now. He deserves that joy and happiness.”
Reynald’s voice was quiet calm. “You want him to find love - but not with your sister?”
Sarah turned to look out at the darkening sky. “If she were serious, then perhaps I would not mind. It is hard to know. As it is, I imagine Rachel is not serious at all. The poor man’s emotions are in turmoil, and she knows he cared for me. It just seems … wrong.”
Reynald spoke from behind her. “Perhaps she seeks to distract him from his sadness.”
Sarah wryly chuckled. “I do not know if it really helps, when one sister turns you down, to have the other dally with you for a day or two and then vanish as well. That would seem more likely to make things worse.”
She shrugged. “Well, they are both adults, and I can only hope that Simon does eventually find the woman he is meant for. He is deserving of that contentment.”
Exhaustion seeped through her bones, and her eyelids suddenly were enormously heavy. Simon’s sad eyes seemed to stare out at her from the darkness beyond the windows. Taking a deep breath, she wearily stood. “I am sorry, but I am still exhausted from yesterday.” She smiled tiredly at Reynald. “Thank you, for everything.”
Reynald swept down into a bow. “Sleep well, Sarah,” he offered with a quiet look.
She moved past him, making her way to her room. She glanced for a moment at the door one to the right of her own … her sister’s room … before heading in to collapse into sleep.
* * *
Sarah’s awareness slowly came into focus. Someone was softly knocking on her door. A voice came seeping through. “Sarah, wake up. Sarah!”
Sarah pushed off the covers and staggered her way over to the door, pulling aside the bolt she had thrown in a vain hope of, for once, getting some uninterrupted sleep. She carefully swung the door open.
Her sister tumbled into the room, her face glowing with excitement.
“Sarah, it was wonderful!” she whispered loudly, bursting into giggles. She hugged herself tightly, her blonde hair bouncing with her movements. “Simon is so sweet, so kind. His hands – they are so soft!”
Sarah rubbed at her eyes. What time was it? The night seemed pitch dark, with only drifting moonlight filtering into the room.
Rachel plunked herself down on Sarah’s bed with ease. “I must tell you all about it.”
Something within Sarah snapped. She was tired to the bone, and hearing about Rachel’s exploits with Simon was more than she could bear. The poor man …
She reached out a hand and took Rachel’s, hauling her sister back up to her feet.
“Please, not tonight,” she insisted sharply. “You can keep your Simon tales to yourself.”
Rachel’s face fell in disappointment. “I want to tell you!”
Sarah’s eyes grew bleak. “Why is it that half of the time you deliberately hold things back from me and the family – or even lie about certain issues? Then when you feel that a bit of truth is advantageous to your own goals, you want to force us and others to hear it?”
Rachel pouted and her voice grew louder. “I am only trying to share my life with you,” she grumpily huffed.
Sarah walked over to her bedroom door and stood by it. “The last ten men you went dancing with, you did not say one word to me. You lied outright about two of them. Then suddenly, when you are seducing the man who was only recently courting me, you feel obligated to wake me up in the middle of the night to share every last detail?”
She shook her head in frustration. “Do you even realize you do this? You lie frequently. You hide truths frequently. When you share truths, it is often in a situation which deliberately upsets others. Not tonight.”
Sarah waited until Rachel had stalked out of the room before closing the door firmly behind her.
Sarah stood by the door for a few moments, taking in several deep breaths. She felt unhappy about snapping at her sister, but she was just so tired of everything.
She slid the bolt home again with firm resolution, then made her way back to bed.
Her sleep was fitful and dark.
Chapter 5
Sarah skipped lunch the next day, instead grabbing some cheese and bread from the pantry and taking them to her room. As the day wore on, her tensions slowly lessened with the gentle breezes and a robin’s melodic warbling which floated in through her window.
Finally, she climbed to her feet with resolution. Maybe she was just feeling worn down. It seemed that she had been on the go for weeks on end. Couple that with no sleep and the leftover guilt from having hurt Simon ... she needed a change. A quiet ride into town would do her some good.
She was cinching her horse’s saddle tight when Reynald strode into the stables to join her. He scanned her activity with an interested look in his eye.
“So there you are,” he commented lightly. “Your sister was looking for you earlier.”
Sarah kept her eyes lowered. She strove to keep her tone even. “What did Rachel want?”
Reynald shrugged, leaning against the side stable wall. “She did not say. She left an hour or so ago, to visit a friend. Your father sent one of the guards as an escort for her.”
“Hmmmm,” answered Sarah with a noncommittal murmur, putting the issue out of her mind. She had to learn to let Rachel go, to stop treating her as a helpless little sister. Rachel was a grown woman now. Fully capable of taking care of herself.
Reynald let the silence slide. His eyes moved to her horse’s saddle with a steady glance. “No bag, and no haste. So this is not an emergency call?”
“No call at all,” replied Sarah, looking up to meet his gaze. “I am heading into town for some supplies. The rosemary and sage should be ready to harvest soon, and I was going to acquire more pouches and glass containers in which to store them.”
Reynald moved toward his own horse. “Please allow me to escort you, then.”
Sarah focused her gaze on her horse’s bridle, settling the leather gently against his face. “I hardly need an escort,” she pointed out with honest appraisal as she worked. “The supplier is only a half hour’s ride, and the roads are s
afe enough. I’ve done it hundreds of times on my own.”
Reynald gave a brief tug on his horse’s saddle. “A short ride, and yet you never can tell,” he commented quietly to himself. The sharp tone in his voice made Sarah dart a glance over at him, but his head was lowered to his work, and she could not judge his expression. Shaking her head, she mounted up.
“As you wish,” she replied. She was content enough that he would be riding with her and had no real desire to drive him away.
The two headed out into the warm summer sunshine. A scattering of gilt-edged clouds drifted across the sky, the ivory shimmering against the cerulean blue. A flock of sparrows danced and soared overhead before spinning off toward a distant farm.
A golden glow seeped into her soul, nestling there, seeming to echo in Reynald’s amber eyes.
* * *
Reynald let the silence drift for some time, curiosity growing in him about the woman by his side. At first glance, she looked like many other noble ladies he had met over the years. Her locks were tawny, waist-length, and shone in the sun. Her dress was finely embroidered and well fitting. She handled herself with serenity and grace. In talking with her he had come to know that she was well educated and possessed a quick wit.
The more he spent time with her, however, the more intrigued he became. How many noble women would choose to ride out in the middle of the night to help a peasant give birth? How many would risk their own lives to deal with wandering gypsies and assist people they barely knew?
Finally he put voice to his musings. “Tell me, how did you become interested in midwifery?”
Sarah was silent for a long while, and Reynald rode alongside her, comfortable with the quiet. He had been on enough long rides that he understood the value of patience, of letting a story unfold in its own time. After five minutes had passed, Sarah looked up from the road.
“I grew up with two close friends - Dorrie and Tanya - who were dear to me. We did everything as a threesome. Dorrie was quiet and shy, while Tanya was always bursting with confidence and energy. She would be the first one to leap in the center of a room and sing a song. The first to grab a stranger’s hand at a dance. When we went to the tavern to hear traveling minstrels, she would insist we stay until the very last song.”
She gave a wry smile. “Dorrie and I tried to look out for her as best we could, but as we grew older, Tanya only became more headstrong.”
She paused for a moment, lost in thought.
Reynald let the silence extend, putting no pressure on her. A few minutes passed before she continued.
“Tanya had always been the scrawny one when she was younger. I think it was her high energy which burned every ounce of fat from her body. When she turned fourteen, she promptly filled out, in a womanly sort of way. She spent long evenings with the musicians at local taverns. They plied her with food and drink. When her belly rounded out, we took it as a good sign, that she was finally getting enough food into her. We never thought to question it.”
The pause now dragged on for quite a while. Reynald looked over at Sarah, watching her profile. She had a quiet strength in her, as well as a deep reservoir of emotions. He could see how difficult this was for her, to think back over the situation with her friend.
“She was pregnant,” stated Reynald quietly.
“Yes,” whispered Sarah, her voice more of a cry than an answer. She brushed away a tear. “She told no one. She was embarrassed. She was afraid that her mother would get upset at her.” She scoffed in despair. “Get upset? Her mother was the sweetest woman you could hope to meet and treasured the old ways. Her mother would have praised her fertility and adored the grandchild.”
Sarah shrugged. “Still, you know how young girls can be sometimes. They can see the world through a rippled mirror.”
“Everyone has their secrets they are loathe to reveal,” commented Reynald. “It is part of being human.”
Sarah looked out into the distance. “Perhaps you are right at that,” she agreed. Her face became serious. “However, in this case, Tanya’s clutching to her secrets meant that I found her, bleeding, in the corner of her stables. Something had gone wrong with the baby. She pleaded with me not to tell anyone. She insisted that we could handle this on our own. She had already lost so much blood, though, that I knew it was beyond my help.”
She sighed and looked down the path. “I ran for her mother, and a physician was fetched immediately. Despite his best efforts, it was too late.” She shook her head, wiping away more tears. “If she had only trusted in someone - anyone - then she would be alive today. Instead, because she hid away, she died.”
“So now you offer protection without judgment to women who are pregnant,” finished Reynald in understanding. “That way, no woman is put in that position again.”
“Yes,” agreed Sarah, taking a deep breath. “No matter what, I will keep their confidence. My reputation spreads as I take on more patients. Then other women in trouble take that step to contact me. My reputation and honor are, in a way, far more important than any particular skill I have learned over the years.”
“As well it should be,” agreed Reynald softly, half to himself. He gave himself a shake, turning back to the woman by his side. “What did the mother do?”
Sarah looked down the road, lost in thought again. “She joined a nunnery,” she commented with a quiet smile. “She works with young girls now, to help guide them and provide them with a friendly voice. I believe she has done a lot of good; at least that is what Dorrie tells me. She lives near the nunnery with her husband, and visits occasionally.”
“That is some comfort, that she has found a way to spend her life helping others,” mused Reynald.
The two rode on in quiet, each lost in their own thoughts.
* * *
When Sarah came down to lunch the next morning, she found that Reynald had already left for the day. Disappointment swam in at her, and she pushed the feeling aside. Her mother only had a vague notion of where he had gone – apparently he had eaten early and then ridden off. Rachel was still sound asleep, so Sarah enjoyed a quiet hour with her parents before preparing for her afternoon’s tasks.
When Sarah returned to her room, she found Rachel coming out of her own room, bleary-eyed with sleep. Her younger sister smiled widely at Sarah as they passed in the hall.
“Morning, dearest Sarah,” called out Rachel, wiping at her eyes and yawning.
“Good morning indeed,” teased Sarah gently. “Another late night?”
Rachel brushed the loose tendrils of blonde hair back from her face. “Maybe,” she responded with a mischievous grin before heading down the stairs.
Sarah watched her go, considering. If she had been with Simon, maybe it was not such a bad thing. Rachel did like musicians, after all, and perhaps Simon’s gentle ways would help to tame Rachel’s youthful exuberance. Was the match really such a bad one?
She went through her supplies with practiced ease, choosing which ones she would need for her trip. Her schedule was a simple one – a half hour ride to visit with Melissa, who was only six months pregnant. The young seamstress had never given birth before and was understandably nervous about the process.
Sure that she had everything she needed, Sarah allowed herself the time to catch up with her weeding and garden tending for an hour. Then, with the sun still high, she gathered her horse to head out.
She enjoyed the ride out to Melissa’s home in the afternoon sunshine, covering the short, familiar route in no time at all. She spent a comfortable hour sitting with the woman, answering her questions and drinking mead. The time flew by, and Sarah was relaxed and content when it was time to head home again.
She was walking her horse quietly along the main road when she heard hoofbeat sounding behind her. Glancing back, she saw that it was Reynald approaching her, his horse streaming along at a hard canter. Once he realized who was sharing his road, he pulled in and slowed to a trot, then a walk.
“Greetings, Sarah,” he c
alled out with a concerned look. “You are out without a guard?”
The dust on Reynald and his steed indicated he had been out for quite a ride. Sarah wondered where he had gone to, but bit her tongue. If she began to pry information out of him as to his travels, he might feel equally inclined to pull details from her.
“Well met, Reynald,” she answered in a light tone. “I was just over the hill with a friend and am on my way home. I do not take escorts with me when visiting my patients. In any case, it certainly is a fine day for riding.”
“Indeed it is,” he answered shortly, his eyes scanning the forest. It seemed to Sarah as if he would say something more, but he took in a breath and turned his head. He rode at an easy pace, keeping his steed alongside hers.
After a few moments he spoke again, his voice calmer. “So everything went smoothly?”
“Yes,” she acknowledged, “and I am very thankful that things are quieting down. I am looking forward to the pheasant stew that I heard was being made for dinner.”
Reynald’s eyes brightened. “Oh? That does sound like a good ending to this day. I am becoming quite spoiled, lodging in your home.”
A furious gallop sounded behind them, and both turned quickly to see who was bearing down on them. Reynald’s hand dropped to his sword, his eyes sharp. He relaxed visibly as the rider came into view. It was Rachel, leaning low over her roan stallion. She was on them in moments, pulling to a hard stop alongside Reynald, almost running her horse into his.
“There you are, you slowpokes!” she cried out in delight as her mount skittered sideways in agitation. “Plodding along on such a fine day! Come, Sarah, race me to the gates.”
Sarah smiled gently at her sister, demurring. “I am sure you would win, Rachel,” she pointed out. “Your horse is far faster on the short stretches. I concede victory to you.”
Rachel’s face wrinkled into a frown. “You spoilsport!” she cried out in frustration. “You could at least try!”
Sarah bit her tongue. Perhaps it did not matter if Rachel would win by default. Rachel simply wanted her chance to shine, and would it cost her that much to give her the opportunity? She smiled brightly. “You are right, of course,” she agreed. She turned to Reynald. “Would you give us the starting mark?”