by Shea Malloy
“Kar,” Jillian said, finally breaking her silence. She pushed her glasses up to settle better on her face. “We don’t think you fu—” she glanced at Kelan. “We don’t think you made a boo-boo.”
Karen snorted. “A boo-boo?”
“Shut up. Kelan repeats everything he hears. He’s too smart for his own good. Which is saying something because, you know, his mother and all.” Jillian grinned. “Maybe it’s from Mikaal’s genes.”
Karen chuckled. “Yeah, it’s all Mikaal for sure.”
“Hey!” squawked Megan, eyes dancing with amusement. “Give me some credit. I might not be able to count to a hundred without getting dizzy, but I landed a rich king.”
They shared a laugh, the mood lightening between them.
“Like I said, we don’t think you messed up,” Jillian said. “What you did was pretty brave.”
“And romantic,” added Megan. “Kinda like what Jonnar did for Jillybean.”
“Yeah,” nodded Jillian, smiling fondly at her sleeping daughter. “I remember being furious with him and I imagine that’s how Kess reacted too, right?”
Karen nodded, holding back the part where Kess went one step further in his anger and stole a kiss from her forcefully. But if she had to split hairs, was it a stolen kiss if a part of her wanted it? Enjoyed it? Stirred her desire for more?
Jillian patted her hand. “He’ll come around. He’s actually a good guy. If it wasn’t for him, Jonnar wouldn’t be alive and we wouldn’t have escaped Pheor.”
Karen raised her eyebrows. “He’s the guy who helped you? The cop that went rogue?” She shook her head in disbelief. “So he saved my life and yours and Jonnar’s. He deserves an award.”
Megan smirked and pointed at her stomach. “It’s already cooking.”
“I mean, an award he’ll want,” Karen said, dragging a fingernail across the table’s surface.
Jillian softened her voice. “Are you going to keep the baby?”
“I haven’t decided yet.” But a bitter taste filled her mouth at the thought of destroying the tiny life growing inside her.
“Your leave-of-absence is coming to an end soon,” said Megan. “It’ll be tough to juggle a baby and medical school, but you can do it, sweetie. We’ll be here to help.”
Karen splayed her fingers on the table’s smooth surface. The time had finally come to tell them the truth.
I’m not going back to medical school.
But the words only went as far as her head. They couldn’t leave her lips. She’d just weathered one storm of scolding from her sisters, she didn’t have the strength for another.
They’ll support you.
Would they? For most of her teen years, right up until her early twenties, she had a tendency to be carried off in whatever direction the wind blew that day. When she’d chosen to go to medical school, she’d thought she’d finally grown up, finally knew what she wanted out of life. She loved helping people, loved the idea of making a huge, positive change in someone’s life. Becoming a doctor had felt like the right choice, the perfect way to prove to her family she was responsible, committed, her days of flakiness and stupidity behind her. Agreeing to Trevor’s marriage proposal was where she’d taken the bad turn and fallen all the way back down to ground zero.
So she was leery of making any hasty decisions without considering the far-reaching consequences first. Well, barring the fact that she’d just gotten herself impregnated with an alien man’s baby.
Sure, she’d finally found the thing that ‘clicked’. During school, she was the resident healer to her peers. Her Magic Hands—as her roommate, Abigail, called them—would cast out all the aches and stiffness in her classmates’ joints and muscles accrued from the heavy workload. They’d even begun to pay her despite the fact that she was unlicensed and untrained.
But as much as this path called to her like nothing before, she couldn’t switch lanes. No, she didn’t want to because she didn’t have enough belief in herself. Better the devil you know. What if she fell flat on her face all over again?
Kelan let out a little squeal of excitement at the rectangle he’d built, drawing her attention. He thrashed his handiwork with a swipe of his hand and started again, babbling to himself.
Karen stood and went to Tamiah’s cradle, bending to kiss the sleeping baby girl on the forehead. Then she joined Kelan on the floor. Kelan grinned at her, his father’s handsomeness replicated in his blue-violet eyes and cherubic face. She scooped him up into her arms and blew a raspberry on his stomach, much to Kelan’s amusement.
She looked up to find her sisters smiling at Kelan’s giggling. She joined them, her heart lighter now that the sombre mood had lifted.
“Thanks for the encouragement, guys,” she said. “But right now, I’d rather be a funny auntie than worry about my impending motherhood.”
—
“Better, yes?”
“Yeah, much better. Thanks, Zezvar,” said Karen, awarding the red-spotted alien doctor a weak smile.
She wiped away the droplets of water still lingering around her mouth with the back of her hand. The contents of the breakfast she’d had this morning with Megan now resided in the toilet. The roiling in her stomach had subsided thanks to Zezvar’s miracle liquid which he stored in a glass vial.
Karen lay on the bed as Zezvar instructed and allowed him to examine her. She covered her eyes with her forearm to block out the daylight streaming into her room. She felt a little on edge that something was wrong with the baby, and she waited in dread for Zezvar to confirm her worries. Where had Megan disappeared to, anyway? When the terrible nausea had hit, Megan had fetched Zezvar for her immediately before scurrying off. Perhaps she’d gone to check on Kelan.
The door to her room slid open and Karen lifted her hand away from her face to see if Megan had returned with Kelan. Or maybe it was Jillian with Tamiah. The sight of her nephew and niece would definitely cheer her up right about now.
But it was neither of her sisters.
Kess stood just inside the doorway. His violet eyes locked onto hers immediately and he stalked into the room with the slow purposefulness of a predator.
Zezvar beamed at the sight of Kess. “Ah, Yen Kess. You’re well enough to be walking around, I see. Any pain?”
“Some, but rest will take care of it,” Kess replied.
“Good. Very good.” Zezvar nodded. Then he frowned at the scanning device hovering over her stomach before he peered at Karen. “Yena Karen, your temperature and heart rate have suddenly increased. Is there a problem?”
No matter how much she liked the alien medic, she wished in that moment she could strangle him.
She shook her head quickly. “No. No problem. I’m fine.”
“Well, you’ll be happy to hear that the implantation was successful and the foetus is healthy,” Zezvar announced. He scribbled on his translucent tablet before he stowed it in his bag and began packing away his equipment.
Relief swept through Karen yet new anxiety followed on its heels. In a matter of months she would be a mother. The thought was so surreal, she barely registered what Zezvar said as he gave her advice on how to ensure she and the baby remained healthy. But she was super aware of Kess, though. He stood with his arms folded across his chest, taking it all in. It weirded her out and she wished he would leave even if a tiny, traitorous part of her was happy he’d come to see her.
“I must return to the infirmary,” Zezvar said cheerily, bag in hand. “My research awaits. Visit me when you feel strong enough, my Yena. I’ve much to show you.”
“I can’t wait,” Karen said, sitting up and smiling at him. When Zezvar left, the smile vanished as she rounded her gaze on Kess. “Why are you still here?”
He raised an eyebrow. “Do you want me to leave?”
His long hair was tied back, the usual defiant wisps curling over his forehead and his temples. His healthy bronze colour was restored and the dark shadows beneath his eyes were non-existent. He wore the jacket from t
hat night except the hole in the shoulder from the shot was gone. The jacket had a dull shine like leather, but Karen remembered the texture being much softer when she’d opened it to bandage him. Black pants and boots completed his outfit. Combined with the tattoos curling around his thick upper arms she’d seen when he was naked in the infirmary, his muscular frame, and the dangerous, distrustful look lurking in his eyes, Karen realized Kess epitomized ‘bad boy’ one hundred percent.
Her Achilles’ Heel when it came to men.
Oh, the irony.
Karen pursed her lips. “Yes.”
Instead of leaving, Kess grabbed a chair and dragged it near the bed. He plonked himself into the chair and pinned her with the intensity of his violet-eyed gaze.
“Make me.”
Karen glared. “The first time I met you, I thought you were unpleasant. You had one bright moment where you changed my mind and then you squandered it.”
“You speak as if I care what you think of me.”
“You don’t have to care, but you should consider an attitude adjustment.” Her glare persisted. “You’re alive right now to give all this lip because of me.”
“And you are alive because of me.” His features remained stony and emotionless. “If you consider frankness to be rudeness then you will be further disappointed in your conversations with me.” He leaned forward, his mask cracking to reveal the anger burning in his gaze. “Furthermore, you might be with child, but rid yourself of any illusions our relationship will go any further because of it. I will support you but I will not marry you, human.”
Karen reared back like if he’d slapped her. She shoved off the bed to stand and appear in control but it was a futile attempt. Even seated, Kess had this dominant aura that reminded her he could snap her in two like a dried twig if he felt like it. She saw what he was capable of the night he rescued her. But like she’d said the night before that, she wasn’t afraid of him.
“My name is Karen. Human isn’t my name, it’s my species and referring to me as such doesn’t make you superior in anyway. It just makes you sound narrow-minded.” Karen sneered, anger bubbling up inside her. “Also, I don’t want to marry you. Not in a million years.”
He watched her intently as if he didn’t believe her. “Your sister insinuated differently when she came to tell me you were unwell. I thought perhaps you wanted to use the Klara’s power to force my hand.”
“Wow, who died and made you king of the universe?” Karen shook her head in disbelief. “My god. If I’d known you were this big of a jackass, I’d not have gone through the trouble to save you.” The anger rose, burning her from the inside out along with her rational thought and self-control. “You know what? To rid you of any illusions I want our relationship to go any further, I might as well ask Zezvar to get rid of this baby and—”
He moved so fast, Karen let out a startled gasp when he lunged and grabbed her hand.
“No.”
“Let go of me!” She tried wresting her hand away from his grasp but his fingers might as well be steel. He stood, towering over her, scowling down at her like if she’d just called his mother a whore then spat on her grave. He used his strength to intimidate her. This wasn’t the way a man should treat a woman—or any other being for that matter—and she despised him for it.
Christ, he was tall. Built as solid and immovable as a tree that had survived for centuries. Despite the fury raging in her chest that he manhandled her, she had this inexplicable and ridiculous urge to climb him.
“You will not destroy my child,” he said, his gaze as hard as ice and his voice just as cold.
“Your child?” she spat. “You’re laying claims now? You don’t want it so how is it yours?”
“I have never said I did not want it. It is my essence, therefore it is my child in your body.” His true emotions on display, his gaze swept over her, equal parts assessing and hungry. His eyes met hers again, his voice low and insistent. “And you. You are mine, too.”
Nonplussed, amazed, indignant, Karen knew she should shout at him she wasn’t some goddamn property for him to own, that he was a colossal jerk for restricting her movement with the clamps he called fingers. Instead, his possessive tone and the blatant hunger in his gaze flipped the switch on her arousal. A wave of heat rolled through her and settled between her legs. What the fuck was wrong with her? She likened herself to one of those female leads in some of the romance books she read when her medical textbooks turned her brain to mush—too stupid to live.
“I’ll be yours the day hell is as cold as my dead Nana’s backside.” She scowled at him. “Why are you so insecure that you need to intimidate me?” She tugged on her arm. “Let go of me, Kess.”
It seemed like he would ignore her demand and do more than just hold onto her arm. Perhaps he’d kiss her like he did in the infirmary. Karen’s breathing slowed and she hated herself for the anticipation building inside her. She willed her arousal to go shoot itself in the head, and she convinced herself she wasn’t disappointed when Kess released her hand.
“I apologize,” he said quietly, surprising her. His features were stoic as he shuttered away his emotions again. She held her hand against her stomach, tempted to rub it against her shirt to eradicate the feel of him still impressed on her skin. She didn’t know what to say and clearly he had nothing left to say either.
He turned away from her and strode out of the room.
6
Kess
—
Kess entered the first carrier he encountered and selected his destination.
He closed his eyes and leaned against one of the transparent walls of the carrier as it drifted downward.
He rolled his shoulder, wincing at the slight stiffness. At least it was healed. The stab wounds from the Muridian attack panged on occasion but not with the intensity like before. Maybe even as soon as a week from now, he’d be in optimal condition as he was before Pheor.
He was alive and he was healthy again.
Thanks to the human—no, Karen, as she’d scolded him—who he had just mistreated.
Self-loathing darkened Kess’ mood. No matter how much his anger might be justified, he’d behaved reprehensibly. Insulting her, manhandling her… how he treated her was unacceptable. He was a Yen, and had been raised to honour even his enemies with respect. Surely the mother of his unborn child deserved far better than the sullen, offensive words he’d awarded her.
The carrier slowed to a stop, its smooth robotic voice alerting him he’d arrived on the main level. Kess slid out the open doors into the bustle of the many individuals that kept the palace in shape, and manoeuvred his way outside.
He paused to enjoy the late afternoon sun’s warmth on his skin. He’d nearly gone insane after being cooped up in the infirmary under Zezvar’s watchful eye for four standard days. During that time, he’d gone from despising the medic for participating in the theft of his essence, to a grudging acceptance. Then, finally, gratitude for the medic’s hard work to cure him.
He was grateful to Karen too even if he had yet to admit it out loud. She was a brave, remarkable, beautiful woman who’d changed her life forever so he might have one. In his Union Police career, rescuing abducted beings from the evil clutches of slavers had been a frequent occurrence. Karen had believed him her saviour. While that might be true, Kess knew he had helped out of habit, out of duty to his Klar and Klara. Karen had saved him because she believed he was worth it to be alive.
If only she knew the truth: that he was a self-destructive failure.
Why are you so insecure that you need to intimidate me?
Karen’s words rang in his head and he knew the answer to that question. She was the first person since Riva’s death to make him want something other than revenge. Whenever he looked at her, there were glimmers of what could be if he allowed it. If she wanted him in her life.
And he despised her for it because for over two standard years, his life’s singular purpose was to find the elusive being who
had killed his brother. He’d felt obligated to follow this one course. Justified that this was his punishment because of his inability to protect his younger brother. Now her presence and the existence of their baby had opened up a new path. One he was unwilling to take because he knew he didn’t deserve it.
Afraid of what it demanded from him—an impending father. He’d have to reevaluate his life choices. The reckless ones that led to him abandoning his post as Commander to go undercover as a member of a Muridian gang, the ones that left him stranded on a deserted, dying planet. The ones that almost got him killed because of his desperate need to avenge Riva.
Reluctant to pursue that train of thought, Kess resumed his walk to his grounder. Now that he was well again, he had some unfinished business with a certain lizard named Liol.
He considered returning to the garage and waiting until nightfall for any sign of Liol’s reappearance, but he decided against it. Liol would have learned of his three runners’ deaths and would have come to the conclusion that Kess was still alive. If Liol had any bit of intelligence, he’d avoid doing business in any locations he believed compromised.
So, Kess drove back to Anric. The weapons store owner was one of the many contacts he’d acquired over the years in his police career and who’d told him about Liol.
“Last I heard, he’s stocking up in Tarabet for a shipment to Stoath.”
Kess’ clenched his fingers into fists. The planet, Stoath, was of similar constitution to the now extinct Pheor; a wasteland of extreme heat and desert dust. It was a haven for the criminally-inclined and where his brother was last seen alive.