by Sabrina Kade
“I’m afraid not,” Hujun says, offering no other words before he starts charging back atYayk and me.
Selim and Kagin are too frightened to move, watching the woods above growing busier and busier with movement, so Hujun has a clear path.
“Lower yourself!” he barks just a Yayk goes to throw me at him, and I find a brief opening to duck under his arms only as Hujun heavily tackles him to the ground like a linebacker on a quarterback. I roll away as Hujun pins him down to the earth, and I spit the bunched-up fabric to the ground, couching violently.
My eyes widen. Yayk has no chance.
More dilewilers are on the ground now. Sniffing the air.
One of their faces meets mine, and through everything, I can’t help but look at the damn thing more closely. It’s hideous. And though Hujun promised they’re not complete wild animals who act only on instinct, it’s hard not to think of them that way.
A dilewiler has the body of a spider monkey, except it has six legs. Two of them so it can walk upright, and the other four are there for, well, I guess they’re for climbing through trees or picking the meat off bones. It also has a long, fluffy tail, more like I’ve seen on a princess-y cat than a monkey. But the weirdest thing of all is the trunk. Dilewilers have trunks kind of like an elephant’s, but they also have teeth in the center like something out of a horror movie.
I shudder as the dilewiler continues to look at me with its four vibrant red eyes, as though sniffing the air, but to my relief, it shakes his head and starts lumbering in another direction.
Relief washes through me… until I realize it’s heading right toward Hujun and Yayk as they continue to roll around in the earth.
“Hujun! Look out!”
“Don’t move!” Drazal shouts. I notice he’s fighting with one of the other Sidyths and Phoebe is nowhere to be seen, but I have to find comfort in that I can’t hear her screaming. Maybe the dilewilers really won’t attack us because they view us as bringers of food and not food itself.
“Lower again!” Hujun’s voice thunders and I spin around, remembering that a dilewiler is heading right toward him. To my surprise, it’s merely sitting on its haunches before him while Hujun holds Yayk up in the air by his neck and legs. Hujun’s roaring for me to move, and once I duck down, he tosses the massive Sidyth at the waiting dilewiler.
Screeching with delight, the four-eyed spider monkey catches Yayk in four of its six arms before slamming him down to the ground. A small part of me wishes he had died instantly so he would be spared, but he’s still screaming when a few other dilewilers come rushing to the scent of fresh blood.
“Brother!” Yayk screeches, sounding terrified and clawing desperately to grab something.
Anything.
“Come to me, Ellis!” Hujun roars again.
In my stupidity of watching the scene, I don’t realize how close I am to the feeding frenzy. Yayk tries to seize my leg, and I cry out when he succeeds before I can move closer to Hujun. I scream as he starts dragging me toward the sounds of tearing flesh and the scent of raw meat. I can’t hear what’s going on with the other two Sidyths, and I’m not even sure I want to know. I need to focus on staying alive.
My fingers tear into the hard dirt so deeply they start to bleed right before Hujun finally reaches me and starts to haul me out of Yayk’s painful grip. It dawns on me how quickly I could allow myself to die. I could let go. I could allow myself to be torn to shreds by the beasts that look like monkeys and elephants if they had a devil baby. But I don’t. I want to live.
Hujun says I have to stop blaming myself for what happened with Yayk.
He’s right.
And though maybe Yayk doesn’t deserve to die, Hujun wants to punish him.
He knows no other way.
I crawl into Hujun’s arms as he pulls me against his chest and Drazal comes close to his side with Phoebe thrown over his back. She’s awake, and shivering violently in fear, but she’s alive.
We all are.
“Ellis,” Hujun rumbles, nudging his face closer to mine.
Through all that’s happened. The lies and the deceit. The fear and the horror of the dilewilers, Yayk, and his buddies. I’m alive. I’m in Hujun’s arms, and he’s holding me as though I’m the most treasured diamond in the galaxy. His eyes are wet, and I think he’s crying, but then something even more beautiful blossoms across his hard features.
He’s smiling. He’s smiling at me.
A sincere and honest to God smile. I can see his terrifying fangs, but I don’t care. I don’t care that I can hear the screams and shouts of Yayk and his buddies as they’re torn apart by dilewilers. My heart should go out to them more. I don’t know them. I don’t know anything about them, and now I never will. Selim and Kagin were simply with Yayk at the wrong place and the wrong time.
“Oh, God. I thought… oh God… I thought…” I croak, wrapping my arms around his neck. Hujun shudders against me as though trying to contain his emotions, and honestly, I don’t care what he does. He can cry, shout, yell, smile… whatever. He can do whatever he wants as long as he continues to hold me like this. I pull away and hold his face in my hands. “Kiss me. Hujun, kiss me, so I know this isn’t a fucking nightmare I’m about to wake up from.”
Shockingly, I don’t have to ask him twice.
His lips fall upon mine amongst the feeding frenzy and Drazal’s gentle urgings that we should leave the forest before the bodies are eaten. I keep kissing my alien as though nothing else in the universe matters.
Nothing else does.
So long as I feel these lips against mine, so long as Hujun will do all of this for me, and we can make it to the other side, nothing else fudging matters.
We keep kissing until I notice a change in the light around us and realize Hujun’s brought us out of the forest, but not as deep into the field below. Drazal’s already setting up a furry tent for the night, but Hujun seems hesitant to put me down.
I’m fine with that.
Reluctantly, I pull my lips away from his long enough to sneak a peek at Phoebe before guilt starts to bite at me. But Drazal seems to be keeping her safe enough, lowering her into the shelter without another word to us. I should care more, but all I can think about is my alien – my man – who seems like he would do anything now to keep me safe.
“Is she going to be okay?” I ask as Hujun sets me down on my feet and sets up our shelter.
“I am not sure. I think the sight of the dilewilers has stirred up a fear that she has suppressed. Drazal heard her muttering something about Todas, but they are not the same thing.” He shakes his head.
My eyes widen. Todas.
“She was hit by one before we got here,” I say pathetically. “Maybe that’s why she’s scared.”
Hujun hums thoughtfully. “It is a possibility. A shock to her system, I’m sure. She has likely been suppressing this fear, and after seeing the dilewilers, it is possible those memories have resurfaced.”
I stand there, taking in the tent Drazal has set up for himself and Phoebe, wondering if I should go in there and talk to her. I know how frightened she must feel. I’m not sure if I’m ever going to get over the fear of almost being raped because of my stupidity, but I also realize I’ve never bothered to learn anything about Phoebe’s past. I remember her getting hit. I remember her having to stay on the ship with Arizona and the Toda, as the rest of us left to start our assignment on Hethdiss, but I know nothing more than that. Phoebe never mentioned anything about it. I always assumed she was fine.
What did happen on the ship before the Toda let her go?
My eyebrows furrow.
“She will be taken care of,” Hujun says in a low voice. “Come, we need to get some rest. We’re heading back to Prince Korben’s lair tomorrow.”
My eyes widen. I can’t hide the look of excitement on my face, I guess, and Hujun is quick to pick up on this.
“This makes you happy, yes?”
“You know it.” We both crawl into the s
helter for the night, and despite everything, I’m buzzing with joy. It’s over. We’re going home.
And though I’m still under contract, and my happiness could be cut off as early as tomorrow, at this moment, I’m so happy.
Focus on the here. Focus on the now.
It’s never been easier to follow Kansas’ advice.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Ellis
When the four of us are back at Korben’s lair, I realize how much I’m starting to think of this place as home. Perched on Hujun’s back, every time I close my eyes now, I think of him smiling down at me while he held me in his arms. Nothing was more romantic. And though both of us were too tired to attempt pleasuring each other that night, it doesn’t matter. I don’t feel rushed to show him what I can do. This alien wants me. Almost as I want him, and nothing is going to ruin it for me.
But, like clockwork, life tries to find a way to piss me off. Kidding! Sort of.
Starting with a grumpy faced Iriel standing in front of the lair opening with crossed arms. He frowns when we draw near, and though he doesn’t say anything to Hujun or me, he shoots the angriest expression at Drazal.
“What have you done to her?” he snaps, seizing Phoebe from his arms. “What has he done to you?”
“I’m okay!” Phoebe squeaks. “Seriously, Iriel.”
“You’re a mess.” Iriel rolls his eyes, glaring at Drazal. “Next time you want to take my human for a pleasure trip, why don’t you ask my permission first?”
Drazal blusters but doesn’t answer. He shrugs his shoulders and storms off in another direction, leaving Hujun and me.
I want to protest. I don’t like how Iriel talks about Phoebe. Especially after seeing how she behaved in the forest with the dilewilers and especially after what Hujun said about how she spoke about the Todas. Something’s wrong, and whatever it is, Iriel isn’t helping. But still, as much as I hate to admit it, Phoebe is a grown ass woman and needs to deal with her problems.
She needs to find her version of happiness if possible.
And I want to focus on mine. With Hujun.
Keeping me perched on his back as we make our way through the lair, some of the other women look at us with wide eyes and shocked expressions, but not many say anything to us. I wrap my arms more tightly around Hujun’s neck, and a rumbling sound comes from his throat.
Is he… laughing at me?
He pats my arm. “I can tell you are glad to be back.”
“I’m glad to be away from dilewilers,” I admit quickly.
“I told you all would end well. Trust in me, my Ellis.”
“Overconfident asshole.”
“My charming poopsicle.”
“What… what did you call me?”
“Is this word not a compliment? A term of endearment?”
“No!”
Another rumbling sound comes from his throat as he presses on, stopping in front of the Gathering Room. My face crumbles as I realize that while we did share a beautiful night, maybe he’s not ready to take me back to his—
“Wash up and let everyone know you’re okay,” he rumbles, placing my feet on the ground. “I will be back to pick you up.”
“Pick me up?” I must sound shocked because when Hujun stretches back to his full height, there’s a small smile on his face again.
God. How did I live without that smile?
“To come back to my lair?” he cocks his head to the side. “Is that alright?” He sounds so hesitant my heart races with excitement. For someone this massive, and alien, Hujun is adorable.
“It’s more than alright.” I stand on my tip toes to drop a kiss to the skin over his heart and quickly spin away to follow his instructions. I’m excited for a night of pleasure to begin, and Hujun must feel the same way because he’s already bustling down the dark hallway as I turn around to check on him.
“Holy shit, you’re alive,” Kansas says when I turn back to the Gathering Room. There aren’t many other women there, and I’m relieved I don’t have to spend the rest of the night answering questions. I don’t want to talk about dilewilers or Yayk.
Not now. Hopefully not ever.
I just want to get washed up and fuck my alien.
“I’m alive,” I say proudly, brushing past Kansas towards the privacy stalls. She slowly follows, along with Sloane, Layla, and Aoi. I’m happy not a lot of the girls say much as I shuffle into the bathing space and start to wash the dirt and grime off my skin. It feels great to get clean again, and though there’s no soap in here that reminds me of home, I swear I detect the leftover remnants of the coconut candle we burned at Christmas time.
By the time I’m fresh and dry waiting for my alien to arrive, I’m starting to get a bit antsy. Maybe Hujun’s changed his mind. Maybe he doesn’t want…
And then something dawns on me, and I smirk at Layla.
“I hear you got quite the Christmas gift.”
Her dark eyes light up. “Oh… my… God!” She shoots a look at Sloane. “It was seriously the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever experienced, girl. I wanted to die. I wanted to kill her.”
“For the last time, Layla, I’m not the one who told Dolan to sing in front of you.”
“Then who did?”
“Phoebe,” I interject before they start bickering. I don’t mind a little girl chat, but sniping is something I’ll be happy to avoid for another day. “Phoebe already admitted it was her. She thought it would be cute.”
“Phoebe?” Layla seems genuinely shocked by this. “Seriously?”
I nod. “Yeah. She said she didn’t tell him to sing in front of the others, though. She told him not to do that. At least I think she did? I don’t remember the exact story. You’ll have to talk to her.”
Layla’s in shock. Sloane leans a little closer to her, carefully wrapping an arm around her shoulders. And though she’s quiet, I can see Layla relaxing against her. Hopefully, this means they’ll start acting like friends again.
“It wasn’t that bad, was it?” I dare to ask Layla. “The singing, I mean.”
Layla shakes her head. I swear she’s blushing. “It… it was… interesting.”
“But you didn’t really hate it, did you?” Sloane asks, shooting a careful look at me and then her friend. “I mean, you have to admit. It was kind of cute. The air guitar?”
Layla rolls her eyes, but there’s a smile on her face. “It was a little cute. I guess.”
Then there’s a collective sigh of relief. I wonder what else Dolan’s been up to when it comes to trying to win Layla’s affections. I know she has eyes for Exer – the human looking Sidyth – but he only has eyes for Sloane. But the look on Layla’s face is encouraging. Maybe this slowly forming love triangle will never actually connect. Wouldn’t that be a relief for everyone? And after everything that’s happened with Hujun and me, I can’t help secretly rooting for Dolan.
So long as he treats her well.
Otherwise, maybe I’ll ask Hujun to threaten him.
And then a voice makes me clench my thighs together.
“Are you clean?”
I spin around, and sure enough, there’s my alien. Over seven feet of muscle, scaled skin, and intense golden eyes. He looks nervous about drawing so much attention to himself, but he also has no problem entering the Gathering Room.
“For now, she is,” Kansas says with a soft elbow to my ribs.
I can’t help but smile. I’m shocked, but I don’t think I would have minded if Hujun took a little longer to get down here. I’m interested to find out what’s going on with Dolan and Layla. I want to know if Sloane’s shown any interest in Exer. Damn, I need to talk to Phoebe about what happened to her, Arizona, and the Toda. Plus, there’s Kansas, who’s shown me a kindness and a patience few other women have. And I don’t know anything about her or the Sidyth she’s spending time with.
Before I stand, I brush my fingers against Kansas’ arm.
“Thank you,” I say awkwardly as Hujun wraps an arm around my sho
ulder.
“Thank you? For what?”
“For the chanting stuff. That helps with panic attacks.”
“You make it sound like I’ve brought you into a cult.”
I ignore her joke. “You might want to talk to Phoebe about it.”
Her freckled nose crinkles slightly. “You think I haven’t tried?”
Shit. Kansas has tried talking to her about it. But if Phoebe’s not opening up, that can only mean she’s turning to Iriel. I’m not sure if that’s a good idea.
“I’ll keep trying,” Kansas promises.
I nod. “And one more thing. Tomorrow. I want to hear more about the Sidyth you’re hanging out with. Dash, right?”
Shockingly, a blush crosses her cheeks. It makes her look much younger than she is, as though she’s no longer carrying years of hard work on her shoulders. And though I’m not quite sure why she shakes her head as though the blush embarrasses her.
“We’ll see,” is all she musters.
I’m sure there’s more to Kansas’ story than she’s willing to share with Hujun and some of the other girls around, and I guess I can accept that. I give Kansas’ shoulder another careful squeeze before ducking more deeply into Hujun’s arm and allow him to lead me from the Gathering Room.
Only a few months after arriving on Hethdiss, there’s so much going on with the other nineteen girls. So much I’ll never really know. And as much as I want to fuss over them and make sure no one ends up in a situation like I did with Yayk, only one thing matters right now.
I smile up at Hujun.
Pleasuring my man.
***
Though I was in Hujun’s room only a few days ago, it’s still a shock to see it now. York said Azan’s room is practically empty, and of course, I’ve seen how elegant Korben’s place is because he’s a prince. Hujun’s room falls somewhere in between. My eyes dance across his enormous bed with a few furry blankets draped neatly all the way to the end. Two simple tables hold his clothes (I guess it’s a lot of shorts?). I want to memorize everything. The space. The scent. The sights. But it becomes difficult when Hujun wraps his arms around my waist and presses his face into my curly hair, sniffing it deeply.