by Tara Brown
Not that I’d seen many try. Most were scared. She was brilliant, honest, and humble. No one was ever prepared for that combination here. Especially the humble part.
My sister was one of the leaders sitting at a table. Just not the sort that fit the mold. Here, men took the lead and women looked pretty.
And that was the mold I had always shaped myself in accordance with.
I had been a follower to the extreme. I always made it look like I was my own person, but I wasn’t.
I even gave it—it—up sophomore year of high school because Cait had pressured me. She’d said virginity was passé, and if I wanted to be in the club she was forming, there was a strict no-virgins rule. I did it with a drunk boy I didn’t like at a party I didn’t want to be at.
Dad smiled at Ella before turning back to Rachel’s father. “Honestly, the school’s amazing. The opportunities it provides for the kids are top notch and incomparable to the other schools. Some years I’ve seen the worst student here get picked for the best colleges, entirely based on the academy.” His voice dropped down. “You just have to keep your inner Democrat hidden under the table. No one likes to see it out in public.”
“Phillip!” Mom leaned forward, shaking her head slowly at my father. “That’s a lie. There are several Democrats out here. They came out at the last election.” Her eyes narrowed. “You will recall.”
“I do.” He nodded and took a gulp of his whiskey. He was one of them; my mom was just in denial about it.
“Left an impression, did it?” Ashley laughed. His cheeks flushed when my mother glared at him.
“Indeed.” My dad winked.
Ashley pressed his lips together and raised an eyebrow, lifting his glass at the rest of us. “Good luck to us all fitting in.” His eyes flickered to me again. When he stared at me, I noted tension before his eyes darted to Rachel. “You sure you want to be involved in this world?”
“No,” she laughed. “Not after that first meeting. And I’m glad I didn’t go to school here. Sorry, Ry.” She glanced at her brother. “I hope they keep being nice to you.”
“I hate Paulson.” Ella popped back into the conversation. “It’s the worst school ever. I’m so glad I don’t go.”
“You don’t?” Ryan asked.
“Not a chance.” She shook her head. “I’m a senior in New York. Our dad stays Monday through Friday for work, so I come and go with him. We have a house there.”
“She goes to Trinity,” I said proudly, hoping he saw that she was so cool.
“Really?” His eyes widened. “Wow, that’s a good school.”
“Yeah.” She gave him an odd look. “I know. And the city is much more diverse. Obviously.”
“Paulson is not so far from the city.” Ryan laughed, hinting at something.
“And I come home on the weekends.” She blushed, and I was puzzled.
Had I missed an important part of the conversation?
Was my sister actually flirting?
Is this what it looked like?
“Speaking of the Spring Fling club.” Andy turned to Ashley. “You’re probably going to get dragged into going.”
“Are you going?” Ashley asked. I hoped the question didn’t sound scripted.
“He can’t. He’s not an option,” Ella answered.
“Says who?” Ashley turned to her.
“She did.” She tilted her head at me. “No exes allowed. He dated Cait.”
“You choose who can go to parties and who can’t?” Ashley’s eyes narrowed as a wry grin screwed up his lips. He was playing this part a little too well, making me uncomfortable. I wished the dinner conversation didn’t turn to this, but I knew my parents needed to be played and convinced.
“I’m glad I can’t go. It sounds like too much work anyway. From what I hear about some of the girls, it’s a lot of formality and not a lot of reward. Bunch of girls who just want to play at dating but don’t know the first thing about it. Why all the games?” Andy’s words hit home, attacking me without calling me out.
Only now I had no defense of the club—not a real one. I could joke all I wanted, but the reality was that I was ashamed of it and all my years spent belonging. I hated Cait, the club, and even being here, watching my mother wave her arms around and dazzle and play into the whole charade. I wanted to go home and pretend none of this had ever happened.
“Excuse me.” I stood and walked to the bathroom. I needed a minute. A minute of no more club or guy talk. It might have been an act, but it hurt nonetheless.
I leaned into the mirror, considering my own soul, and decided that this summer was going to be different. This summer I was going to get my revenge and possibly redeem myself in my own eyes. Prove I wasn’t a silly girl who played silly games.
Just then, the bathroom door shot open, and Cora burst in. “Cait’s on her way in here. She said she needed to talk to you. I thought I should give you a heads up.” She hurried into a stall and closed the door.
I clenched everywhere as I waited for the attack.
A second later Cait stormed in. “Cherry, how’s it going? I haven’t heard from you for weeks.” She gave me that fake smile, the one that I saw through now.
“Oh, just busy. Wrapping up the year was a bit more time consuming than normal.” I glanced at her in the mirror.
“You were spaced out at the club meeting. Is everything all right?” Her eyes narrowed, daring me to accuse her of sleeping with my boyfriend. Daring me to be ballsy and stand up for myself.
“I’m just drained from the semester. I’m sure I’ll be feeling more myself in no time.” I bowed down to the queen of clubs.
“Hmmm. I heard about you and Griffin breaking up.” She leaned against the counter and then turned, looking at herself. She was beautiful in every way, except on the inside. “I was in France when it happened. Sarah messaged me. I was sad to hear the news, but glad you’ll be part of the club again this summer.” Her smile widened, like it was real. “I was worried he might throw a wrench in the situation.”
“France?” I almost twitched and screamed that she was a lying bitch.
“Yeah. Just for the week. I needed a break. School was actual work this year, ya know?” She winked a lush set of lashes at me.
I fought the urge to rip them off.
“You still look tired and funky. You better snap out of your haze and look alive for the selection party at my place. As one of the seniors, it’s your job to step up your responsibility and set an example.” She took charge again, pushing me down so I remembered my place. When she turned back to look at herself, she dropped the act. “What’s with the new girl, Ronda? Her brother is gorgeous. Who is he?” She got Rachel’s name wrong on purpose. She did that.
“Rachel? Her name’s Rachel, not Ronda,” I muttered, desperately holding back all the murderous things I wanted to say and do. But killing her in the bathroom wasn’t going to ruin her, just me. “Not a clue about the brother.” It was the truth. I knew nothing about him. “He’s only a senior at Paulson.”
“Oh, he’s young.” She sniffed. “And the other guy at your table. He’s not related to her?”
“No, that’s Andy’s new BFF. Ashley Jardine. He’s from England. Kind of a dick, like Andy.”
“Hmm.” She primped her hair. “He’s not my type anyway.”
“No.” I smiled, mocking her in my head. He wasn’t someone’s boyfriend, so of course she wouldn’t be interested. “Of course not.”
“But he is hot. You should convince him to come. See you tomorrow night.”
She walked out and that was that.
She would claim him.
Ashley would be hers for the summer.
How did I feel about that?
Staring at my reflection in the mirror, I had to be honest with myself. I liked Ashley. A lot.
Him dating her was not something I wanted to think about. It was everything Ella and Andy wanted, but he wasn’t one of us. Even for money, he didn’t deserve this.
<
br /> And what if he fell for her?
That might break my heart a little.
But it wasn’t like I could even acknowledge my attraction to him. I couldn’t very well pay him to be my fling and then really date him without the whole thing turning out like the plot of Pretty Woman.
All of that meant he would be dating her. She’d take the bait. Andy and Ella would win.
And I was going to get my revenge.
But it didn’t feel good, like it should.
“She is such a liar. She flew to France the day after you caught them.” Cora slipped from the stall, interrupting my mental crisis. “I think Cait knew they got caught and fled.”
“You think she knew I saw?” I wondered if all my friends knew that it was Cait. How humiliating, everyone talking about it behind my back. No doubt Cait was laughing about it and me.
“I think so. She won’t own it; you know how she is,” Cora whispered. She was always so quiet. She rushed forward, hugging me. “Please don’t let her get to you. She’s disgusting.”
“I won’t.” I hugged back, gripping tightly to my friend.
“Three months and we’re back at school, and we never have to hang with her again. This is our last summer. You can do this.” She sounded like she was telling herself that as much as she was convincing me.
“You’re right.” A slow, disappointed sigh slipped from my lips as we left the bathroom. “I’m going to get some fresh air for a minute.” I squeezed Cora’s hand and slipped from her grip, turning left as she turned right.
I hurried to the deck, pushed the door open, and almost stumbled out into the fresh ocean air. I gasped my breaths, heaving as the rage and fury dissipated.
How had I thought I could handle this, seeing Cait acting so smug and lying her face off?
The door burst open behind me.
Through my rage-filled rant, I saw a face and hands that pulled me into a warm body, wrapping itself around me.
Ashley.
He was warm and comfortable and familiar in a way he shouldn’t have been. “You okay?” he whispered.
Ashley held me in the cool breeze, letting me lose the anger as a subtle awkwardness crept in. Here I was hugging him when I’d technically just sold him to the devil.
I cleared my throat and gathered myself, pushing back a bit on his chest. “Sorry. I was just so mad. I didn’t even realize I was crying.” I wiped a tear and laughed bitterly at myself. “Andy says it’s because I’m a ginger and the evil rage makes its way out in tears because I so rarely get angry. It has to come out somehow.”
“While Andy is an idiot, that actually sounds plausible.” He laughed with me, but his eyes were full of concern. “I saw that girl follow you to the bathroom. Are you okay?” His concern was killing me.
“Yeah, she was just full of lies and passive-aggressiveness. And I was filled with an uncontrollable rage. It took every ounce of self-restraint not to kill her.” I glanced at my trembling hands. They shook with unspent desire.
His hands lifted and closed around mine. It was the simplest act ever and yet maybe the most sensual thing ever done to me. He held them until the trembling stopped. “You’ve got this, Cherry. We’re going to take her down.”
“She’s already asked for you to come to the selection night.” I said it so softly that the wind almost carried it away. I wished it had.
“Wow, I haven’t even turned on the charm yet.”
“Oh, please.” I sniffled and laughed.
“She’s already taken the bait. It just got real, didn’t it? Maybe you’re right, maybe we should bring Ryan and Rachel into the fold. This doesn’t seem like their cup of tea either.” He sounded like Andy. Only, standing here in the dim lighting from the lanterns around the deck, in the dark, crisp air, he was obviously something else.
“Yeah, we could use the help. I’m feeling like we’re way out of our league.”
He lifted a hand and brushed my hair to the side. I shivered, but not from the cold.
“Let’s go back inside. You’re freezing.” He held my hand and led me back to the door. I wanted to go home. I’d had enough excitement for one night. Crying at the country club was so basic, it made me want to scream.
“Does my makeup look okay?” I lifted my face in the light by the entrance.
“Perfect.” He sounded conflicted, but his eyes weren’t. They were screaming that he was going to kiss me, convinced this was their moment. He paused, staring, as if having a wrestling match with his conscience over whether to do it or not.
The angel on his right shoulder won.
He blinked and lost all the emotion.
Which was probably for the best.
I’d just given him away, so of course I shouldn’t go kissing him.
Ashley opened the door and led me back inside, still holding my hand.
As we walked back, as if on a timer set to go off the moment I was even close to interested in someone, Cait’s eyes darted to where we were. They narrowed into slits, like she didn’t know I saw her plotting. A smile crested her bright lips as she nodded at the person speaking to her, but her eyes followed along with whatever I was doing and wherever I was going.
“And us holding hands just sealed the deal. Cait will make her play for you,” I whispered.
“It’s what we want, right?” He glanced back at me and squeezed my fingers lightly.
I forced a grin to my lips. “Yeah. It’s what we want.”
He squeezed a little harder, as if needing me to steady him this time, while Cait eyed him like he was part of the spring lineup at fashion week.
It was exactly like Ella had planned.
Except as much as I wanted Cait to go down, I really didn’t want Ashley to go with her. Holding his hand, I couldn’t lie anymore. I wanted him for myself. I was just being honest about it now that I couldn’t have him.
Ashley pushed in my chair as I took my seat, desperately ignoring the glare coming off my mother. She would no doubt be researching who Ashley was and confirming his identity by morning. Fortunately Ella had prepared for this moment.
Ashley sat and stared at me, possibly still checking to make sure I was all right.
I wasn’t.
I’d never been so conflicted in my life.
“Everything okay?” Rachel asked in a soft whisper.
“Yeah, just had a chat with Cait.” I acted like it was nothing. “I think she wants Ashley to be her summer fling.”
“Really.” She swallowed hard. “I sort of got the impression he was more interested in being yours.”
“No.” I took a huge gulp of wine. “I was asked to put in a good word by the queen bee herself.”
Rachel glanced her way. Cait lifted her glass, grinning. We were playing into her hands as much as she was playing into ours.
“And how does he feel about that?” Rachel asked, giving Ashley a look.
“The whole Spring Fling formal is a joke. No guy wants to be asked out by a girl.” Andy puffed his chest a little.
“No, indeed,” Ashley agreed. “We like to hunt.”
“Oh, there will be hunting.” An evil smirk played upon Ella’s lips. “It just won’t be you doing the chasing.”
“I’m not interested.” Ashley said it like he was serious, but when he glanced back at Cait, his stare suggested otherwise. He played his part perfectly.
Between the vile grin on Cait’s lips and the hateful one on Ella’s, I was beginning to fill with dread.
Chapter Nineteen
THE END OF ANGST
Cherry
The ride home was unbearable.
He’d come to my rescue again.
He’d hugged me and comforted me.
He’d held my hand and looked into my eyes like he was going to kiss me.
And I was selling him to the wolves.
If I stared out the window and let the conversation he and Andy were having become nothing but white noise, I could still feel his arms around me and his hands ove
r mine.
Making it all worse, I watched him in the reflection of the window, catching his eyes darting toward mine.
As we pulled up to the Weinbergs’ house, I sat up straight and readied myself for the next ten minutes of final packing and getting back into the car. I would need a plan for handling Mom when I got to the house. I hoped she continued drinking at home after dinner.
At least I would have Ella.
Ashley popped open the door and stepped out, holding it open for me. Andy jumped out next, not seeing the gesture for what it was.
But I did.
Our eyes met as I climbed out. “Thanks.”
“Of course.” He grinned and offered his arm. “When we get in, can we go over what I have to do tomorrow again? Seeing everyone in action tonight made it more real.”
“For you and me both,” I mumbled. “Rachel and I are going to meet you and Andy at Cait’s house,” I began. “Ella wants Andy to come; she thinks it will unnerve Cait a bit that I’m throwing him in the pile. We’ll all go inside, pretend to mingle. You will flirt with me mercilessly so everyone thinks you’re interested. Cait will bully me into letting you be her date like she has every other summer.”
I didn’t stop talking as we passed through the front door. “You and Andy and all the guys will leave, and we girls will choose our dates. The tradition goes that Cait will then show up on your doorstep with a small gift and ask you to be her fling. You say yes, because you’re not allowed to say no, let’s get real. And then you and she will go to the Spring Fling, and from there, we commence our plan of forcing her to break all her own rules.” I took a breath.
“Okay.” He nodded. “I think I can manage that.” His lips toyed with a grin as Andy stalked off to one of the bedrooms and we walked to the fireplace and stood there.
“Just remember not to fall for her.” I said it with a hint of warning. “As you’ve now seen for yourself, she’s gorgeous and sneaky. She has those womanly wiles people talk about.”
“She’s not my type, Cherry.” He stared straight into my eyes, making my breath hitch.
“My mother was in peak form tonight,” I said, changing the subject. “Did you see the way she kept touching Mr. Swenson?”