“Mike,” Nancy spoke. “Do you know that guy from the club?”
“That one Lily was dancing with?” Mike specified.
“Yeah.”
“As far as I know, he was the owner.” His questioning eyes flew from one girl to the other. “At least, that’s what Alen told me. He was really upset seeing Lily with him yesterday.”
“We don’t give a shit about how Alen felt,” Nancy put in sharply instead of Lily. She knew her friend would say the same. “You know that he’s – the owner’s – the head of one of the biggest transportation firms in the USA?”
“Really?” Mike said in surprise. “Good shot, Lily,” he joked. Nobody laughed. Mike cleared his throat and gawked around.
“How do you know that?” He asked after a minute.
“He was on the news,” Nancy informed, her mouth full of sandwich.
“You haven’t seen him today, right, Lily?” Mike asked her.
Lily sighed, and looked at Mike’s worried face. “No, and I doubt I will. He doesn’t even know who I am.”
“With the money he has, it wouldn’t hard for him to find you,” Mike supposed, turning to the waitress.
“He’ll only try to find me if he wants me,” Lily added rapidly.
“I think he’s right,” Nancy said to Lily while Mike was occupied in talking to the waitress. “If he wants, he can search around for you easily.”
“But I’m not sure I want to see him again,” Lily thought aloud, taking a sip of her coffee. Was that what her heart wanted?
Now that Mike was here, Nancy finally quit questioning Lily about the mysterious man, but even that new silence didn’t help Lily to stop thinking about him. Suddenly, the stranger of the club had become a part of everything she saw, and everywhere she looked at she saw two green eyes hung in mid-air.
The lunch was over in thirty minutes. Lily, Nancy, and Mike walked out of the café. It was still raining. Mike held the door for her, then he took the umbrella from Nancy and opened it.
“Hurry up, Mike,” Nancy cried out, protecting her face with both hands from the little raindrops falling through the air.
Lily heard her friend complaining and Mike laughing, but her attention was attracted by a tall man standing on the opposite of the street. The stranger’s eyes were fixed on Lily as if he knew her. He wore a long black coat, and an equally black hat. He wasn’t carrying an umbrella, and seemed not to mind getting wet. His hands thrust in his coat pockets, the stranger kept on staring at Lily, still as a statue.
“Here we are, baby,” Mike held the umbrella above Nancy’s head, then peered back at Lily, “Come along. You’ll get drenched. Hey, Lily.”
Lily jerked and turned her eyes away from the man in black. Mike smiled at her, pulling her close under the umbrella.
“Wake up, baby,” he whispered in Lily’s ear. “What are you looking at?”
Without waiting for an answer, Mike looked in the same direction as Lily was, but the strange man dressed in all black had already gone. One second was enough for him to disappear from Lily’s sight.
“What’s up?” Mike questioned.
“Nothing,” Lily shook her head.
“Are you sure?” Nancy put in. “You look scared.”
“Oh no, I’m just tired,” Lily answered rapidly. “I just thought I saw a man I knew, but I was mistaken.”
“Who?” Mike asked curiously. “I didn’t see anybody there.”
“He disappeared as soon as you looked,” Lily sighed and glanced at Nancy. “Shall we go?”
“Yeah,” Nancy replied, looking just as curious as Mike.
5. Samael
Lily woke up in the morning with the skin beneath her blue eyes swollen and red, as though she hadn’t slept at all. She would have been happy to stay awake the whole night if that meant she could free herself from the unending, agonizing dreams about Samael.
Why had the dreams about Samael replaced the ones she had used to have the last two years? She missed the dreams about the handsome, black-haired man, all clad in white, the one who had taken her hand and offered to take her to a heavenly beautiful place.
She slid out under the covers, took a deep breath, and left the room. Nancy was waiting for her roommate, having already set the table for breakfast.
“Hey, sweetheart, how are you?” She hurried out of the kitchen, examining Lily’s tired face. “Didn’t you sleep well?”
“No,” Lily replied honestly.
“What’s happening to you, Lily?” Nancy asked. She blew out an exasperated breath, “I didn’t think you’d be as obsessed with him as you are. He doesn’t deserve your tears.”
“This isn’t about him,” Lily lied. “I’m just a little sick.”
“Maybe you should home,” Nancy supposed, brushing Lily’s hair behind her ear. “I’ll tell the professors–”
“No, no,” Lily cut her off. “I’m coming. I don’t want to stay alone all day long.”
“If you need me, I can stay with you.”
“No. Just let me take a bath and we can go.”
“Are you sure?” Nancy asked, looking roughly into Lily’s eyes.
“Yeah,” she pulled her hand away from her friend.
Nancy’s eyes dropped to rest on a birthmark on the back of Lily’s right shoulder.
“That’s neat, you know?” Nancy called after her. Lily stopped and turned around. “I mean your birthmark.”
“What’s neat about it?”
“It looks like the Holy Grail or something. Just look at it!”
Lily just grinned and disappeared from Nancy’s sight behind the bathroom door. Nancy returned to the kitchen.
Lily joined Nancy in the kitchen after a few minutes, dressed in blue jeans and a pink shirt. Nancy filled her plate with fried eggs and placed it in front of her. Lily began eating in silence.
“Do you have any plans for tonight?” Nancy asked.
“I’m going to try to finish my essay for marketing,” Lily replied.
“Can’t it wait for one night?” Lily peered up at Nancy, a question in her blue eyes. “Mike and I are going out to a club again, to have a little fun. I thought you could catch up with us.” Lily opened her mouth, but Nancy cut her off with a quick gesture, “Alen won’t come, I promise. And we’re going to a different club. I just want you to drink and have fun and forget about that son of a bitch. Although I will admit, he was a really hot son of a bitch.”
Lily couldn’t help smiling. She shook her head and looked away from her friend, still wearing a little smile on her face.
“What?” Nancy asked, grinning.
“Maybe I should tell Mike about how you feel,” Lily said with a gloating voice.
“If you do that, I’ll kill you, you know that,” Nancy widened her eyes.
“Somehow I doubt that,” Lily looked at Nancy sarcastically. “Thanks for the invitation, but you know, I don’t want to bother you and Mike.”
“Hey, how many times do I have to tell you that you don’t bother us?” Nancy said. “We don’t give a shit if you’re around us or not. I’ll kiss him whether you’re around or not. I’ll make love with him whether you’re around or not.”
“Thanks for the invitation.”
“I didn’t mean exactly that.”
“Okay, I’ll go out to the club with you. But I’ll tell Mike all about that hot guy and the dirty dreams you’ve had about him.” Lily rolled her eyes at Nancy.
“I didn’t tell you anything about my dirty dreams,” Nancy sounded surprised and confused.
“But I can imagine. I can make up a good, dirty dream,” Lily sniggered.
“That’s called blackmailing–”
“I know,” Lily interrupted quietly and took the fork to continue her breakfast.
“Okay, okay. But one day I’ll make you regret it,” Nancy jabbed her finger toward Lily, but couldn’t hold her smile for long. Of course she knew that Lily was kidding, Lily would never share any of Nancy’s secrets. Especially not
with Mike.
“I hope it won’t be soon.”
“You can pray it won’t be,” Nancy said, returning to her breakfast as well. “But I haven’t gotten your answer about tonight. Are you going?”
Lily stopped chewing and put the fork on the table.
“I don’t know. Maybe.” She said it just loud enough to be heard.
“Think quickly. It’d be better for you to get out and have some fun. It’ll be much worse if you stay home alone with your memories of him. Believe me,” Nancy hunched over the table and got up in Lily’s face, “I know what I’m talking about.”
“No doubt,” Lily raised her eyes. “Before Mike, you had a lot of practice.”
“Exactly. But,” she lifted her index finger, “I didn’t just sleep with every fuckin’ idiot.”
“Okay, okay, let’s do what you want,” Lily laughed soundlessly under her breath.
“What?”
“Nothing. I said I’m coming.”
“Really? That’s great,” Nancy replied happily. “I’ll tell Mike.” She reached for her cell phone lying on the couch nearby.
“If he brings Alen, I’ll just leave you at the entrance. I’m serious, Nancy,” Lily’s eyes narrowed and became filled with disgust when she mentioned Alen.
“Don’t worry about him,” Nancy assured Lily.
*
All the way to college, Nancy talked about the oncoming evening. She even suggested a few outfits for Lily to wear. For Lily it made no difference what kind of clothes she would wear-anything other than nakedness was fine in her book – but she tried to keep the conversation going with her friend until they got to their station. As the college came into view, Lily changed the subject, saying something about her essays and received a sharp look from Nancy in reply.
“Promise me that you’ll forget about your studying – and that guy – for tonight.” Nancy stopped in front of the gates that lead to the college’s main courtyard.
“Okay,” Lily stammered.
“Good,” Nancy said, walking into the courtyard. Lily followed her in silence, keeping a distance of two steps between them.
Although Lily had promised not to think about Samael, as soon as she left Nancy, thoughts of the green-eyed stranger began scrambling her brain all over again, as though he had been patiently waiting for Lily to be alone. Lily couldn’t understand her desire for that man. She barely knew him, but somehow it seemed to her that she had fallen for him. Was it even possible? Maybe Nancy was right, Lily thought, maybe it would be better to try to have some fun. Lily did hope that a night out would help her to forget the pleasurable moment she had experienced in Samael’s car, the seconds which had only continued to torture her soul for two days already.
Struggling against her memories of Samael, Lily tried to sink into studying.
Finally it was lunch time. Lily put her notebooks back into her rucksack and headed down to meet Nancy at the entrance as usual. Nancy was already there, alone again, looking up something on her smartphone. Lily approached her the moment that Nancy finished her search and placed the phone into her handbag.
“Hey,” she cried out happily as Lily strolled into her view, “how was your morning?”
“Same as usual,” Lily replied, starting forward and out through the entrance.
“Yeah, mine too.” Nancy caught up to her quickly.
It was a sunny day outside, and there was no sign of yesterday’s rain. The warm sun had forced away any kind of cloudy weather, and the shining horizon raised Lily’s spirits.
“Listen,” Nancy said, “I forgot to tell you that we need to go grocery shopping. Our refrigerator is empty. You don’t want to starve, do you?”
“Maybe I want to,” Lily murmured and, seeing Nancy’s narrowed eyes, continued quickly. “We’ll go after class.”
“Okay. That sounds reasonable,” Nancy nodded. “So we’ll go shopping, then go home and get ready until Mike comes for us.”
“As you wish,” Lily replied, climbing down the stairs in front of the college entrance.
They took the general pathway leading out to the college yard. Nancy proceeded to talk about what they needed to buy at the store, and Lily just nodded to every question or muttered “yes.” Despite Lily’s sullen presence, Nancy’s mood continued to match the sunny weather. She was filled with warmth and ready to enjoy the day. Perhaps Lily could stand to learn from Nancy?
Nancy’s breezy voice trailed off abruptly. She stopped dead, snatching Lily’s arm. Lily peered back at her friend in surprise and saw her jaw drop. Nancy’s eyes grew wide and shocked, gazing at the gates.
“Hey, what’s up with you? Have you seen a ghost?” Lily teased.
“Look who’s there.” Nancy pointed toward the gates.
Lily spun around. In the same instant her heart stopped beating, the air vanished, and it became impossible to breathe. Everything around her stopped moving, even time, quiet descended on her ears as if the world had paused itself, and she had been moved to some other faraway place.
There was Samael, standing at the gates, wearing black trousers and a white shirt. He was as attractive as he had been when Lily had seen him in the club. Though his green eyes were hidden behind his sunglasses, it didn’t prevent Lily from feeling their presence watching her. For a split second, Lily thought about running at him and throwing herself into his arms, running a hand through his light brown hair, and kissing the most delicious lips in the world. She had to do her utmost to stay still and remember to breathe.
“Has he come for you?” Nancy’s voice brought Lily back to her senses.
“What?” she stammered.
“You must have made an impression on him, otherwise he wouldn’t have come,” Nancy pressed her lips together and raised her eyebrows. “At least, I can’t see any wings on him, can you?”
“Shut up,” Lily shot back to her, but a slight grin curled her lips.
“What are you waiting for? Don’t you want to go and meet him?”
“How am I supposed to know he’s come here for me, Nancy?” Lily burst out in distraction. “Maybe he has a brother or a sister in this college and he’s come–”
“Yeah, yeah,” Nancy interrupted sarcastically. “Suddenly, he’d have an inexplicable sibling at our college of all places. Don’t you think that sounds a little more farfetched?”
“Nancy, it has to be a coincidence.”
“Not with him.” Nancy took her friend’s hand in hers. “Do you want me to come with you? Maybe it’d be easier with someone else around.”
“Do you think he’s some kind of maniac?” Lily asked, perplexed.
“What?” Nancy said in shock. “No… at least, I don’t think so. But I’ll take a picture of you with him and if you disappear tonight I’ll go to the police with it. Besides, he’s already got the world at his feet – why would he want to risk all of that by going crazy or something. What for?”
“Yeah, I guess it was a stupid thought,” Lily muttered.
“But you’re not going to go and meet him alone, are you?”
“I don’t know, Nancy. Help me,” Lily begged, her voice trembling.
“Okay,” Nancy straightened herself up and made a step forward. “Let’s go together. If he’s here for you, he’ll say something, don’t worry.”
“Maybe we should change our path and go around him?” Lily whispered, padding after her friend.
“No. I don’t want him to think you’re a coward or something,” Nancy said. She frowned back at Lily. “Come on,” she insisted, hauling Lily toward the gates.
Samael remained motionless while the two friends were approaching him. Lily didn’t dare to look at him, but she still couldn’t quash the idea that this man had really come here for her. Her heart pumped faster and faster with every approaching step.
“Nancy, maybe–” she stammered nervously.
“No,” Nancy shushed her with a whisper.
And then they were almost in front of Samael. Lily couldn’t hel
p peering at him. Is he looking at me? Does he recognize me? Will he speak to me? She wondered all this in a second, regarding him from head to toe.
Samael flinched and finally moved his head, his lips parted from each other, and he uttered Lily’s name. Lily stopped dead in her tracks.
“Lily,” Samael said a second time. “May I speak to you for a minute, please?”
Lily stood rooted like a statue, gazing unblinkingly at his sunglasses. Nancy was right, she thought, he came here for me.
“Do you know each other?” Nancy forestalled her friend, pretending that she didn’t recognize him. Lily was glad Nancy had said something. She felt dizzy and didn’t trust herself to speak.
“Yes, we’ve met once before,” Samael replied calmly, not looking at Nancy.
“Lily?” Nancy looked over at her for an answer.
Lily cleared her throat. “Yeah, Nancy, it’s alright. You can go,” she gave a brief look at her friend.
“Okay,” Nancy agreed, hiding a smile before her expression hardened. “But if you hurt her, I’ll kick your ass,” she said, jabbed her finger toward Samael. Receiving no answer, she then spun around and went off. Out of the corner of her eye Lily saw Nancy take a photo of them together.
Lily and Samael stood in a silence, waiting until Nancy was out of earshot, then Lily spoke first:
“How did you know my name?”
“It wasn’t a difficult thing to find out,” Samael said almost affectionately.
“And how did you know where to find me?”
Samael grinned waspishly. “You know, I’m capable of far more difficult things than discovering your name or whereabouts–”
“Yeah, of course,” Lily interrupted curtly, although she didn’t want to seem wholly rude. “With the money you’ve got, I guess it wouldn’t be too difficult to intrude into someone’s life.”
“I could do that without the money.” Samael didn’t seem offended or even concerned. “I just wanted to find you and apologize for what happened the other night. I was rude.”
“You shouldn’t have to apologize,” Lily exclaimed before she could stop herself. “You wanted a little fun, and at first I let you have it. It was my fault.”
Godforsaken: Book 1 (Shade of Light) Page 6