Kismet

by Raynesha Pittman

  For the last year, I’ve been so scared of the Hoes Crew I wasn’t the evil bitch I used to be and I didn’t feel like going back and being her either. Meeting Dre showed me that love could come easy and seeking revenge taught me that being evil took hard work, a lot of time, and you can lose yourself on the journey to get it. I was lost and no one would want me to be found because I fucked over everyone that came near me. My daughter wasn’t excluded. After all the hell I caused, I’d witness enough. I wasn’t worried about karma. My decision to start over and try to live my life right was because I had gotten the chip off my shoulder that had been there since thirteen. Why strive to be a bitch when there wasn’t any anger, hurt, or embarrassment left to fuel it? I’m done because it’s done.

  “I’m not going to promise you nothing, but I will keep it in mind.”

  We hugged, kissed, and said our good-byes. Will promised he and Alvin were going to fly out to Seattle in three months to see me.

  Williams and Williamson’s was packed when I walked in. I almost forgot I was the head of the company until, one by one, people started kissing my ass.

  “Continue working. This is not a pop-up visit. Those will be done by Stephanie. I’m just here to pick up my daddy. Everybody here does an outstanding job. I’m not worried about you at all.”

  The front-desk secretary told me that they were waiting for me in the large conference room and that I had a call, but when she put the person on hold, they had hung up.

  When she said, “they,” I never imagined that would include Dre. He was sitting in the middle of my daddy and my brother when I walked in the room. I turned my back and thought about walking out, but it was time to face Dre too.

  “Dre, what the fuck are you doing here with my daddy and my brother? What the fuck is wrong with you?” I locked the door and moved closer to the center of the room.

  Memphis stood up and moved his chair in front of the door, I guess to block me from leaving. “Sis, I don’t know what happened or what’s been going on over the last few years, but after I pulled my heat out on Tyrone, this man came to my rescue. He came looking for Daddy, but he wasn’t there; then Tyrone pulled up talking about how you fucked and sucked him and his boys like a porno star—sorry, Daddy. I know we don’t get along like that, but you my sister and you doing good for yourself. I wasn’t going to let a nigga disrespect you like that, so I pulled out my heat; then Tyrone and Javier pulled out theirs, and that’s when that man there jumped in between all of us and snatched me up. Savannah, just hear the nigga out. He didn’t say shit to me . . . just dropped me off at Uncle Steve’s house.”

  I was touched that Memphis had tried to be a brother, but he didn’t know the history between Dre and me. When my daddy spoke up, I felt the pains in my side increase.

  “I went to go and close that PO Box today, and I took this envelope out of it. This man here watched me as I did it, and then came up to me and begged me to open it up in front of you and him together. Savannah, you know I don’t play games and, lately, you have put me in a lot of the games you decided to play with people’s lives. Now, I’m going to give you a chance to tell your side of whatever it is that’s going on between you and Andre, and if you don’t tell me, then I will listen to his side and believe everything this man says—now choose.”

  I snatched a chair from under the table and sat down. My phone started ringing back-to-back. It was Will, but I couldn’t answer in the middle of this shit.

  “Do what he says, Daddy. Open the envelope in front of both of us.”

  My daddy opened the envelope and there was an 8x10 inch photo of Sade. Dre stood up and stared at it. I watched the tears come pouring out of his eyes, and they started coming out of mine too. My daddy looked at the picture, and then looked at both of us back and forth. Memphis walked over and looked at the picture.

  “Man, she looks just like you, but I don’t get it. Why my sister got a picture of your baby coming to a PO Box she set up in my daddy’s name?”

  My daddy was far from being stupid. He answered Memphis’s question without confirmation from Dre or me. “That’s because she’s your niece. She is Savannah’s baby.”

  He wiped his eyes and started shaking his head. Memphis went and stood by Dre. “Is that my niece? Where she at? Savannah, where your daughter at? One of y’all needs to speak up.” Memphis started balling up his fists and getting louder with his questions.

  It was time for me to face my past. Dre proved I couldn’t hide from him forever. “Yes, that is your niece. Her name is Sade, and she’ll be four in three and a half months. She lives thirty minutes from us in Tacoma, Washington, with her foster parents, and Dre is her father. I fell in love with Dre, but he turned out to be a local thug, and when I found out I was pregnant by him, it was too late for an abortion, so I gave her away. Are you happy now, Dre? The truth is finally out.”

  I grabbed my phone that was still ringing off the hook and headed for the door. When I looked back, Memphis was patting my daddy on the back, and Dre was still holding Sade’s picture.

  “Daddy and Memphis, when y’all are ready to go, I’ll be downstairs in a blue Nissan waiting on you. Dre, if you want to talk more about this, we can, but not in my place of business. Exchange numbers with my daddy or my brother and call me when you’re ready.” I walked out the door with my head high and answered Will’s call as I headed out of the lobby to the parking garage.

  “I ran into Mrs. Soto up here at the county jail putting money on Erika’s books. She told me Keisha got out of jail last week, but will be right back in ’cause she promises to get you. Her mama said she has been calling your office from a payphone outside of your job every day, waiting on somebody to say you’re there. I’m on my way, baby. Stay inside until I get there.”

  Will was already too late. When I walked outside to the rental car, Keisha had followed me right out the front door of the lobby in my office. I was all alone. I walked to the side of the building where I knew there was video surveillance with an armed security guard watching, but with how long it would take him to get here, I’d probably be dead.

  Keisha was still far enough away from me to try to run, so I tried to run to the other side of the car. I heard six shots, then click, click. She ran out of bullets, but she didn’t need any more. I’d been hit.

  I didn’t know where I was shot. I just hit the floor while Keisha went to work on me. I curled my arms around my face to protect it as I felt her kick me all over my body. She stomped on my rib cage over and over again while yelling, “Bitch, you thought you could get away with fucking my man? You thought I wouldn’t find out? This is for me, Christina, and Melinda, bitch!”

  Keisha dragged me by my legs closer to the car, grabbed a handful of my hair, and tried to slam my face into the door. It didn’t work because my arms were covering it, but she did manage to slam the back of my head into the ground.

  That’s when the darkness came. I just closed my eyes and prayed that after the darkness, there would be a light. I prayed that when she was done, I would be able to open my eyes again, at least long enough to tell my daddy and Memphis that I was sorry and also to tell Dre I was sorry and that I did indeed love him. I loved him back then, and I still did.

  I heard voices.

  “Get the fuck off of her!”

  Was that Memphis? It was too youthful to be my daddy’s voice. Maybe it was Dre . . . Maybe he still loved me too.

  Someone was yelling and another voice was screaming,

  “Call 911, she’s dying!”

  There was a lot of whistling in the wind around me. Someone must have been wrestling. Keisha’s grip on my hair was loosening, yet everything kept getting darker. Somebody had saved me. I just hope I lived to find out who it was.

  Chapter 16

  Deep Sleep

  Where in the fuck am I? I keep hearing beeping and something was holding my eyes closed. It felt like tape when I finally got it off.

  I was in a hospital, but a hospital where? I rea
ched for the nurse button, but there was a nurse already in my room asleep. I couldn’t use my voice. My mouth felt like it was stuffed with cotton. So I started shaking my bed to get her attention.

  She woke up and flew to my bed. “Oh, Savannah, I’m so glad you woke up.” She hit the nurse’s button and yelled, “She’s awake,” and when my room filled with doctors and nurses, she disappeared.

  It took three hours to get my voice back. It was more of a whisper, but at least it was something. Memphis and my daddy came running in my room.

  “How are you feeling, baby? I knew you were going to wake up from that dream eventually.”

  Memphis kissed my forehead and said, “If you scare us again like that, I’m going to kill you myself.”

  I mustered up enough energy to ask, “Where am I, and what happened?”

  Daddy told me that I had been shot in the back of my leg by Keisha and suffered a brain injury, which caused me to be in a slight coma for a few months. I was at the University of Washington Medical Center in Tacoma, Washington. I was transferred here at Dre’s request.

  “Daddy, why did you let that man decide where I needed to be? That’s your decision.”

  He shook his head. “Savannah, you remind me of your mother so much. I know I never told you this, but you’re just like her. Fussing for no reason, always trying to be in control. You know what else you’re doing like her? You’re trying to run off a good man who loves you and little Sade.”

  I had forgotten he had known about Sade and the secrets I was planning to take with me to the grave. “Savannah, before you were released from the hospital in California to be transferred to Washington, they told us you had cervical cancer. Dre went crazy, crying and screaming. He almost got kicked out of the hospital. After doing some research, he found out this was one of the number one cancer centers in the United States and requested you be transferred here. That’s why I let him decide. After all you have done to this man and, yes, he told me the whole story, he still loves you and wants to have a family with you.”

  Dre still loved me? I knew I loved him, but girls fall in love easily. We didn’t know much about each other, but if he was planning to stick around, I guess we would.

  Before my next words could come out of my mouth, my door flew open and there was a group of people coming in.

  “Party over here!” Will’s ass just had to be loud. He was the leader of the pack, and then there was Alvin, Stephanie, Sandy, Uncle Johnny, and Mr. Jefferson.

  What was Mr. Jefferson doing here—especially without Sade? Before I could ask him where she was, Sade came in on her daddy’s shoulders. “Yeah, Mama, you woke up. Now can we have a party, Daddy? With cake and ice cream?”

  I sat up and the whole room told me not to move—like I was going to listen. “Come here, Sade. Don’t you look beautiful like always. Why are you wearing a princess crown?”

  Dre put her on my bed and mouthed, “It’s her birthday.”

  “It must be because today is your birthday. Did I get that right?”

  She smiled ear to ear. “Yes, Mama, it’s my birthday, and I knew you were going to wake up today. I told my daddy, didn’t I tell you, Daddy?”

  She was talking to Mr. Jefferson this time, and he was nodding his head yes while staring at the TV with my daddy.

  My daddy looked over at Mr. Jefferson and said, “Larry, you heard about that boy there? He grew up with Savannah. He couldn’t pass the NBA physical. They say he is HIV-positive. Cal dropped him from the team when he returned; then he shot himself and lived. He’s a vegetable now.” I knew who my daddy was talking about, but I couldn’t look at the TV screen.

  The nurse entered my room with a birthday cake for Sade. I thought Dre might have set it up. “Look at you, Mr. Dre. On top of everything for your daughter, I see.”

  He was clueless as to where the cake came from and nobody spoke up and took credit for it, so I asked the nurse.

  “Did the hospital provide this for my daughter?”

  She set the cake down and said, “No, the new candy striper that was in here when you woke up did. She was leaving and asked me to drop it off.”

  I hadn’t seen that lady since I opened my eyes. That was very sweet of her to get Sade a cake. I know they aren’t paid for what they do. They’re more like hospital volunteers.

  “Well, tell her we said thank you.” My daddy had spoken up since I hadn’t.

  “I will, sir. She’ll be in here with you tonight, Savannah. She has sat with you every night since your second week here. You were her first patient and only patient. She said there was just something about you.”

  The nurse smiled and exited the room. Sandy stood up and started singing happy birthday to Sade, and everybody joined in.

  “Dre, why don’t you take little Miss Sade to the cafeteria so we can get some plates.”

  I knew this was coming. Sandy doesn’t bite her tongue. I’m surprised she waited for those two to leave the room.

  “Start talking. I’ve waited three months for you to wake your ass up.”

  I laughed, and then rubbed my head. I hadn’t realized I was bald until that very second. I had worn a short cut before, so I wasn’t worried about my appearance.

  “First thing first is to fight this cancer and beat it, and then I need to set up a room for Sade at my house. I am not taking her from you. I just want to be a part of the family, Mr. Jefferson.”

  Stephanie stepped up. “And Dre? That’s a good-ass man. If you don’t want him, I’ll take him.”

  Sandy and Will nodded their heads in agreement, and Alvin hit Will in the stomach.

  “I think it’s time for us to date and start where we left off . . . That’s only if he is willing.”

  Memphis stood up and stretched. “Dating would be a good idea since y’all live together now. Don’t look at me like that. Look at your daddy. He works at the restaurant with the Jeffersons. He said you’re holding up the marriage. Me and Daddy already gave him the okay to have you.”

  What was wrong with these people around me? Had everybody suffered brain damage? “Y’all do understand before all of this I had only spent one week with him, right?” Everybody nodded their heads in unison, even Mr. Jefferson.

  “There will not be any wedding bells soon, I can promise you that. But I do love him.” The door flew open, and Dre walked in with plates, spoons, and napkins, and Sade handed me flowers.

  “I love you too, Savannah, and when I get you home, your last name will be Burns like mine and Sade’s, ain’t that right, baby?”

  Sade hurried up and answered, “Yes.”

  My doctor stuck his head in the room and asked if we could wrap it up in an hour because they needed to get me prepared for tomorrow’s surgery.

  “Calm down, tiger, they taking it out. It’s your lucky day. It hasn’t spread or anything, but as a precaution, it’s got to go.”

  Will just made it sound like losing my baby-making organs was a walk in the park. Yes, I’ve always wanted a hysterectomy and tried to get one many times, but with a man who loves kids like Dre, what if he wants more?

  We ate our cake and wrapped up Sade’s hospital party. I hated to see everyone leave, but they all promised to be in the room waiting on me when I got out of surgery.

  I turned on the news and watched Ant’s tragic story in disgust. I knew I had something, or should I say, everything, to do with it, but he didn’t have to try to take his life. He had made matters a lot worse. He has a child. Wouldn’t you think about your child first? Yes, I gave Sade away, and it was a good thing that I did. I wasn’t ready for her, and I still wasn’t. It was in her best interest to be with the Jeffersons.

  There were two soft knocks on my door, and then it opened. It was the nurse who brought Sade the cake. “Thank you so much for the cake. It really made her day.”

  She pulled a chair up to my bed and grabbed my hands. “You are welcome. She’s a doll. I met her two weeks ago with her father. They were asleep next to you. When I woke he
r up, she introduced herself to me, and the introduction included her birthday. Her daddy said she got the mouth from you.” She smiled, and then asked me, “Are you ready for your big day tomorrow?”

  She was a beautiful, bright-skinned African American woman with dimples and tight eyes to match. She was Creole, I assumed, because she had a heavy Louisianan accent.

  “As ready as I will ever be, I guess.”

  She patted my hand some more and stood up. “Well, I guess there is no need for me to stay the night with you. You’re awake now. I will check on you tomorrow night before I head back home. This hospital isn’t my cup of tea. It’s time to head back South.”

  I didn’t know this woman at all, but I didn’t want to be alone in this room. I wouldn’t sleep. “The doctor is checking on me shortly but once he leaves, I would like you to stay one more night with me, if you don’t mind. I can’t stand hospitals, I never have.”

  She agreed to return, and then left. With everything going on, I never thought about what happened to Keisha after our meeting at the job, and I wondered if I still had a job. I called Stephanie to ask her.

  “Yes, Savannah, you still have your job. Mr. Williams has your back. He pressed trespassing charges against Keisha to go along with her attempted murder charge, and he even pressed charges on Erika for lying on her job application about her background, which is a federal offense. You are loved by that company, girl, so stop tripping. We are going to get this cancer out of you and get you back in the office soon. I love you and get you some rest.”

  The next call I made was to my house. I needed to speak with Dre.

  “Hello,” he answered on the first ring. “How are you feeling, baby? Is something wrong?”

  I had to answer his question, “Yes, Dre, there are a lot of things wrong. You don’t know me, Dre. I mean, you don’t know the real me, and how could you because I don’t know her, either. Look at everything I have done to you in the last five years. I hid your child from you, Dre. I played childish games that messed up a lot of people’s lives. I’m not shit. Why would you want to waste your time trying to deal with a woman like me? There is a good girl out there for you, a woman who wouldn’t play mind games. Why me, Dre? Is it because of Sade? Huh? Tell me the truth. I can handle anything after facing death twice.”