by Nora Phoenix
“Can you…?” he asked.
Noah nodded. “If you do most of the work and we’re careful with the stump. I need you, Indy.”
Indy kissed him again, drowning in his man’s mouth. “I need you, too. I need to feel that you’re alive, that we’re still here.”
Lube. He needed lube.
“Stay where you are. I need lube,” he whispered to Noah. Noah’s face broke into one of those smiles that made Indy go all weak inside. He gave him one last kiss, worked himself off the couch without touching Noah’s stump. A quick search in the living room and kitchen revealed no lube. Dammit. He’d have to go upstairs, then.
He ran up the stairs. The sounds were coming from the master bedroom, so he checked the guest bedroom first. There was still a bottle, but it was empty. Indy swore. The guest bathroom yielded nothing. He’d have to barge in on Connor and Josh. Damn, he hated doing this to them, but what choice did he have?
He knocked on the door. “Guys? Sorry to disturb you, but could I have some lube please?”
“Indy!” The joy in Josh's voice was palpable. A wave of love rolled over Indy. God, he’d missed Josh something fierce as well.
“We’re indisposed at the moment, but feel free to come in and grab what you need,” Connor’s strong voice rung out.
Indisposed. Indy grinned. He bet they were.
He opened the door, peeked around the corner. Connor was sitting on one of the sofa chairs, Josh draped across his knee. Josh's ass was bright red, but he turned his head to send Indy a big smile, so Indy assumed he was enjoying himself.
“Glad to see you back safe and sound,” Connor said.
Only then did Indy realize he had gone upstairs naked, and it was the first time the cop had seen him like that. Much to his surprise, it didn’t bother him. How could it, with what he was witnessing from them?
Indy stepped inside, spontaneously decided to kneel next to Josh so he could kiss him softly.
“I’m so glad you’re back,” Josh said, appearing not in the least embarrassed.
“Me too.” Indy rose again. He eyed Connor for a second who was watching him with kind eyes, then decided to include him as well. He bent over and kissed him on his cheek. “Thanks for taking such good care of Josh.”
Connor looked surprised, then composed himself and smiled. “You’re more than welcome. Lube’s on the nightstand. Take it. We have another bottle in the bathroom.”
Indy waved at Josh before he closed the door behind them and quickly made his way downstairs. He threw the bottle to Noah, who caught it with his right hand. He took his spot on the couch again, watched as Noah lubed his fingers.
They both turned on their sides, Indy with his back toward Noah. He pulled up his leg, rested his foot between Noah’s legs so his ass was open. Without preamble, Noah’s index finger pushed against his hole. Indy sighed, let him in. Within seconds, Noah had him squirming. Fuck, he was hornier than he had realized. Noah’s finger grazed his prostate, and he groaned.
Noah’s mouth came close to his ear, and he first licked the sensitive spot behind Indy’s ear, then nibbled on his earlobe. It sent delicious trembles through his body.
“You will not believe what happened in the shower this morning,” Noah whispered in his ear, his breath tantalizing hot. He added a second finger. Indy closed his eyes, focusing on the whirlwind of sensations in his body. “Connor made Josh suck him off, right in front of me.”
Indy’s eyes flew open. “For real?” His words transformed into a moan when Noah teased his sweet spot.
“That man has the biggest cock I’ve ever seen. And fuck, Josh loves every inch of it.”
“I’m perfectly happy with your cock.”
Noah fucked his ass with three fingers now, slowly pushing in and pulling back. “Not as happy as I am with your ass.”
“Noah, please.” He was ready, so ready.
Noah pulled out his fingers. Indy pushed back his ass, opened his legs as wide as he could. Noah’s tip found his entrance, pushed in. Inch by delicious inch, Noah slid in until he was buried to the hilt. Indy laid back his head so that it rested against Noah. So perfectly full. A shiver tore through him.
“Make love to me, Noah,” Indy whispered. It felt different this time, so much deeper than mere fucking. Their souls were as deeply connected as their bodies.
Noah’s arm came around him as he moved his hips to slide in and out. “Indy…” he breathed, “Oh, my sweet Indy…”
Their rhythm was gentle, slowly building up the tension in Indy’s body. Noah’s arms never left him, holding him close to his body and his heart. Indy didn’t touch himself, wanted to last as long as possible. Anything to feel like this. So loved. So precious.
Noah’s face was buried in Indy’s hair when he came silently. A sob escaped Indy as he came, too, painting his own torso.
“I love you,” he said, his voice thick.
“Don’t leave me. Please, Indy, please, don’t ever leave me.”
Indy’s heart rested in his chest, his worries gone for now. Still, he couldn’t promise him that. He’d give him the words he could give. “I love you so much, Noah.”
They went to see the house Connor had proposed together. Snow was twirling down, decorating the barren landscape with a fluffy blanket.
“We’ll have a white Christmas,” Josh commented from the back seat.
Connor didn’t care if Christmas was white or not. It could fucking rain for all he cared, as long as they were together. It was the first Christmas as long as he could remember that he was looking forward to.
“I love Christmas,” Indy said softly. “But I didn’t get you guys any presents… I’m sorry, but—“
“Don’t you dare apologize,” Josh interrupted him. “We don’t need presents. We’ll have a nice, quiet Christmas at home, the four of us. You and I, we’ll cook, and we’ll all watch Christmas movies.” His voice was dreamy, and Connor smiled. Josh was so happy Indy was back home. Connor hadn’t fully realized how much Josh had missed him until he’d seen the pure joy on his face when Indy stepped into their room.
“We’ll also have sex,” Noah added. “Lots and lots of sex.”
“Noah!” Indy tried to go for indignant but couldn’t quite pull it off.
“We’re here,” Connor announced. He’d contacted the realtor, had asked her to set up an appointment. He’d hinted they were highly motivated to buy and wouldn’t haggle over the price. He figured that would help smooth the way and keep other potential buyers at bay. Apparently, the owners had sold it before, but the sale had fallen through, so they wanted to get rid of it quickly.
“It’s gorgeous,” Indy commented as they drove up the long driveway. “I love that red color.”
Connor parked the car behind another car, which had to belong to the realtor. She got out as she spotted them.
“Mr. O’Connor, nice to meet you in person,” she greeted him with a handshake. He didn’t introduce the others, figured he’d keep Indy’s identity safe. He was dressed like a guy this time, which was highly exceptional.
The realtor opened the door with a code on a keypad lock. “You indicated you wanted to look around by yourself first, so I’ll be in my car waiting. Let me know if you have any questions.”
Connor nodded. They didn’t need some stranger to watch them, judge them. “Thank you.”
He got the foldable wheelchair out of the back of the car while Josh helped Noah get out. He could walk using crutches, but he was still weak and easily tired, so they’d rented a wheelchair for the first few weeks. Noah carefully lowered himself into the chair, and Connor grabbed the handles. Josh opened the front door, and they all went inside, closing the door behind them.
One of the things Connor had loved about the ranch was that it had an open-floor plan. The living room, family room, dining room, and kitchen were all connected, creating a huge open space. Because of the big windows on all sides, light streamed in from every angle.
Josh looked around with
a huge smile on his face. “It’s so big, Connor,” he said.
“Wanna start in the kitchen?”
Josh nodded eagerly. They explored the massive kitchen with the appliances that had Josh oohing and aahing. The kitchen looked out on the backyard, which wasn’t much to look at right now, seeing it was winter, but Josh seemed to think it was perfect.
“Look, it’s protected against the wind from both sides, you see? And this patch gets sun about half the day, which is ideal for veggies. I could make at least three raised beds here.”
Connor smiled, noted Indy and Noah looking at Josh with love as well.
The first master bedroom was the original one, with an adjoining bathroom with a huge bathtub. “I love the bathtub,” Josh said. “We could have so much fun in that.”
The shower stall was slightly raised, and Noah’s face distorted ever so slightly when he noticed it.
“The other master suite is completely level,” Connor said. “This one would be ours, I think.”
Noah nodded, shooting him a grateful look. “Okay.”
The newly built master suite was indeed completely level, without any thresholds, even. “Their mother was wheelchair bound, so they had it built completely wheelchair accessible,” Connor explained.
“Look at the windows! It’s so big and light,” Indy said, a big grin on his face. “I love it.”
The bathroom was spacious, too, with handrails already installed everywhere. “It’s perfect for me,” Noah admitted, his expression relaxing.
They slowly explored the entire house, Connor watching them all anxiously, but Josh especially. He wanted this to be perfect, so badly. Josh deserved a home where he would feel safe, loved, protected.
They gathered back in the living room. “What do you guys think?” Connor asked.
Josh stepped into his arms, hugged him tightly. “I love everything about it. It’s so perfect for us.”
He held him tight, exhaled. He found Noah’s eyes over Josh's shoulder. “How about you?”
Noah nodded. “Can’t get more perfect than this. How fast could we move in?”
“Fast.” Connor kissed Josh on his head, let go of him. “The previous sellers have done a building inspection, and everything checked out. All we need to do is get the contract drawn up, and we’re good to go.”
“I can’t put up a down payment until we’ve sold the other house,” Noah said.
Connor shrugged. “No biggie. I can manage it. Do we put your and my name on the contract, or Josh's too? Indy needs to stay out of the paperwork, of course.”
He looked at Josh, who stuffed his hands into his pockets. “I’m not paying, so I say it’s you and Noah.”
Noah and Connor had eye contact for a second. “No. We put all our names on it. We’ll add yours, Indy, when it’s possible. We make this official,” Connor decided.
Noah nodded. “I agree. It’s not about who pays. We’re a unit, a family. All four of us.”
Josh and Indy linked hands, both beaming. Connor’s heart soared. Noah was right. They were a family. And Connor would do anything to keep them safe.
There had to be a way to keep Indy from harm, to find freedom for him to live. Connor didn’t know how and what, but he wouldn’t rest until he’d figured it out. He owed Indy for protecting Josh, but it wasn’t even because of that. His own guilt over the rumors he’d heard about Duncan and his young boy certainly played a part because he’d known and not done anything. But mostly it was because he’d come to realize how deeply Josh and Indy were connected. If something ever happened to Indy, Josh might not recover from it. And dammit, Connor would do anything and everything to ensure Josh's happiness.
He cleared his throat. “Alright, then. Let’s buy ourselves a house and make it our home.”
Meet Nora Phoenix
When she was a little tot, Nora’s mom got a library subscription for her. That, as they say, was that, and a lifelong love for books was born. Nora never stopped reading and doesn’t exaggerate when she says she devours books, rather than plain reads them. She started writing stories as soon as she could hold a pen. She wrote her first full book as a teen (on a typewriter!), but waited waaaay too long to follow her dream to become a published romance author.
Nora writes M/M romance, because hello, sexy boys, and likes her men flawed, strong, and a tad broken. She appreciates a little kink but insists on a happy ever after.
If you want first dibs on freebies, updates on new books, announcements of sales and more, sign up for Nora’s Newsletter. No spamming your email inbox full, promise.
Come hang out with Nora in her Facebook group Nora’s Nook where she shares previews, sneak peeks, freebies, and much more: https://www.facebook.com/groups/norasnook/
You can also stalk her on Twitter and Goodreads, where she shares tons of reviews of M/M romances.
And please, leave reviews of the books you read and loved (including this one, hopefully). It’s the most helpful thing you can do for an author!
Acknowledgments
Publishing my first book was a dream come true. Publishing this second book makes me believe in shooting for the stars.
First off, a huge thanks to my readers. You guys sure know how to make a woman feel loved and appreciated. To anyone who has sent me a message about loving the first book in this series: thank you so much. You have honestly no idea how much this means to a writer. We tend to get down after reading critical reviews (Goodreads, sigh…) and appreciative messages like ‘I loved your book!’ totally make our day and help us go on.
A massive thank you to my beta readers: Kyleen, Michele, Susi, and Amanda. Your feedback made the book so much better.
Sloan Johnson, I loved this cover even more! And the flyers you made for me for GRL were a huge hit.
Tanja Ongkiehong, you saved me when my editor/proofreader bailed on me. You, lady, are a rock star. Dank je wel.
Jenni Lea, my roommate-for-one-night, thanks for doing an extra check on the book. I love you hard, woman.
Courtney Bassett, I don’t know what I appreciate more about you: your fab smut stash, your awesome book recs, or your spelling/grammar advice. You rock.
To all my new GRL friends: I had such a blast hanging out with you all. I can’t wait till next year. I’m not gonna name names, because I’ll forget someone, but you know who you are. Thanks for accepting me into your group.
I owe a mountain of gratitude to the members of my FB group Nora’s Nook. You guys believed in me before you read one word of No Filter, you pre-ordered this book like crazy, and I cannot tell you how much that meant to me.
My last acknowledgement is to Kyleen Neuhold. Thanks so much for your support. You believed in me before I’d even published the first book, and that gave my self-confidence such a boost. God, woman, I love working with you on our Ballsy Boys books. I can’t wait to meet you in real life!
Coming Soon
Don’t miss the next installment in the No Shame Series! In No Fear, we’ll see how Aaron and Blake find each other:
Aaron is drowning. After coming out as gay, he lost his parents’ approval, his job, and his sense of identity. He feels like a freak who doesn’t fit in anywhere. His last hope was his brother Josh, but Josh can’t seem to forgive him for how Aaron treated him when they were teens. Not that Aaron can blame him, because he did treat Josh like crap.
All Aaron wants is for someone to accept him, guide him, because he doesn’t have a clue. When sexy jiujitsu teacher Blake takes him in and starts mentoring him, Aaron has hope for the first time, even though he can’t understand what Blake sees in him.
Blake doesn’t do relationships. At all. He’s more than willing to help Aaron find solid ground under his feet, but that’s it. Until insecure, vulnerable, and surprisingly sexy Aaron gets under his skin, triggering all kinds of protective instincts that make Blake long for more. He wants to take care of Aaron, give him what he needs, but how can he convince Aaron of that?
When Josh’s friend-with-ben
efits Indy’s past finally catches up with him, it endangers them all—and leads to heartbreaking decisions for everyone involved.
No Fear is a steamy M/M romance that ends with a HFN for Aaron and Blake, but has a continuing storyline as well. It’s the third book in the No Shame Series, and is not a stand alone novel, so make sure to read the first book (No Filter) and the second book (No Limits) first. It contains hot sex, a little kink, more hot sex, very mild puppy play, and a beautiful friendship-with-benefits that transcends labels. Also: trigger warning for mentions of sexual abuse.
Preorder No Fear now on Amazon!
(Turn the page to read an (unedited) excerpt)
Excerpt from No Fear
The yellow sticky note on the kitchen counter left little room for misinterpretation.
“Aaron: clean your shit up. Now.”
Aaron Gordon didn’t need a name to know who wrote it. Blake. Aka Professor Kent, the Brazilian jiujitsu teacher who’d kindly taken him into his home, a home he shared at the moment with two women and an older guy—all victims of domestic abuse. And apparently, Aaron had repaid his kindness by making a mess. Again.
He looked around in the well-used kitchen, winced. His stuff was everywhere. He’d left his backpack on the floor, his shoes next to the back door, and his dirty dishes on the counter. He’d even forgotten to throw the carton and plastic of his microwave meal in the trash.
A check of the living room revealed the same. The X-box game he’d played was still on the table, as was the magazine he’d been reading, and the wrapper of his candy bar. He’d even discarded his dirty socks on the floor, right under the coffee table.
The kitchen and living room were common areas, meaning everyone could use them. It also meant you weren’t supposed to let personal stuff laying around. Aaron had his own cabinet in the kitchen, where he could store food and china wear—if he had any. His room also had a large closet for his stuff. It wasn’t even half-full. All he had left were his clothes. He’d sold his furniture and everything else when he lost his job, and had to cancel the lease on his apartment in a DC suburb. His clothes and his car, it was all that remained from the up-and-coming lifestyle he’d once had.