“I wish you had been there,” I finally croaked.
“I’m sure you made a beautiful bride.” My father’s voice shook as he brushed my hair along the back of my head.
My mother was sobbing. “The capital where Derrick…”
I clenched my eyes, blinking back the tears at the mention of his name. I knew why they had refused to visit, but it didn’t make the pain any less.
I wasn’t sure how long the three of us stood there in the entry. The first hour was spent in silence with locked limbs, white knuckles, and glassy eyes.
These were the two that had raised me. Their presence begged for the past, for when I was just a little girl crying to my parents instead of an adult who so easily made mistakes. When I was just Ryiah, not a mage, and certainly not tied up with the Crown, in love with the brother of an evil king. I wanted them to tell me this was all just a dream, that I could make the nightmare vanish, that we could turn down the hall and see my youngest brother laughing in the corner with an impish smile.
But I couldn’t.
And yet, for the first time in the last two months, I didn’t have to be so alone. My parents needed to be prepared for what was to come in case I failed. I had no doubt the first people the king would seek out were my family.
It was much later into the evening, as wax dripped from candles long forgotten, that I finished telling my parents everything that had changed. It was much different than my visit before. Their hearts had already been hardened to loss, their youngest was dead, and their second son had joined a rebel cause. Hearing that their only daughter intended to betray the Crown, that she intended to break up the New Alliance and help the rebels all the while under the Black Mage’s nose? I suppose they had come to expect that the gods were not in our family’s favor.
“Oh, Ryiah.” My mom’s hand shot out to grasp my own. “You don’t have to be the one to do this.”
My response was devoid of feeling. “Don’t I?”
She looked away, biting her lip. My father said nothing.
They knew it even if they didn’t want to admit it. I was the only one, and wishing that I wasn’t the girl stuck with this destiny wouldn’t change a thing.
“We will do exactly as you say.” My father had finally spoken. “We’ll have one of the apprentices keep an eye on the roads and keep a bag of necessities hidden away. The moment we hear of anything unusual, we’ll leave.”
“Where will you go?”
My mother cleared her throat. “South. I have a cousin who lives just outside of Port Ishir. We’ll tell her we’re looking to start up a second apothecary closer to sea and give a change of names. You and Alex have certainly given us enough coin to open a second shop, and the girls can run our first in Demsh’aa. No one will be the wiser.”
A bit of relief worked itself into my chest. Their plan could work.
“You need to be careful, Ryiah.” My father pushed a lock of hair to the side of my face. “This Blayne…” His eyes darkened as his fist curled in his lap. “He isn’t the type to overlook things. If you make even one mistake—”
“I won’t.” My shoulders tensed. “You and Mom won’t lose another child.”
“And your husband?” My mother’s gaze locked on my own. She knew how much he meant; she could see it in my eyes. She was afraid of the thing I would lose. She was afraid for me.
I thought of what the Pythian ambassador said on the night we met: “You’ve found yourself a happily ever after in a time when there are none.” If only I had realized the truth before. “Justice has a price.” I looked my mother in the eyes. “He is mine.”
We arrived at our destination a week later. Frost coated the grass, making a crunching noise as our party approached the base of the great keep fortress. It was as towering as it was dark, a menacing stone beacon like the mountain itself, built directly into a portion of the Iron Range. Hidden away behind it was a small town accessible only by passage within; it housed the country’s most talented blacksmiths that supplied the king’s regiment.
Ian’s parents were two of them.
I now wondered how many weapons they had hidden away amongst their own, unnoticed, while fulfilling the Crown’s orders for steel. I wondered how long their son had known about his parents’ cause, and my view of the apprenticeship took on a whole new light.
All those times Ian had tried to strike up a friendship with the unfriendly Darren, perhaps it hadn’t been quite so innocent as I thought. Would he have been quite so enthusiastic to spend time alongside me if I hadn’t been the girl who caught the prince’s eye? Everyone had seen the way Darren talked to the lowborn girl, shunning the rest of our year.
My stomach churned. Gods, every one of us was tainted. All of us shades of gray. This world of innocence was a lie.
Our group declared itself at the base of a raised walkway. The sentries spent a moment checking our seals before they recognized their guests. We were waved forward, and the first of two iron gates raised. By the time we passed our second set of sentries, a hostler was ready for our steeds while the twenty-two of us disembarked and stood, rubbing our arms underneath layers of wool. The keep’s entry with its stone tunnels was even colder than the outside.
We were told to wait.
Commander Nyx arrived ten minutes later, the air of surprise touching her mouth, but a sharp distrust lingered in her steel eyes. Her gaze locked on me, and I wondered how much Alex had told her since arriving several weeks before. Did she suspect I was here to turn over the rebels to my husband?
I kept my eyes level, willing the commander to silence until I had a chance to explain. The woman had to know the keep could easily overtake our party if we were here to arrest. Darren and I might have more power than most, but the keep was comprised of two thousand members, and they had the backing of several northern townships that kept the rebels’ cause.
“To what do I owe this unexpected visit, Your Highness?” Nyx’s tone betrayed none of her emotion; if anything, it showed more warmth than I had ever experienced during my stay in her regiment just one year before.
Darren frowned at the openness of her request. The prince wasn’t fool enough to discuss his mission in an open tunnel. Who knew what others might be within hearing. The many floors of storage were just beyond. Some of the crates and barrels were large enough to hide a man. Darren’s sharp gaze flit over the shadowy crevices at the entry of the keep’s central passage.
“Can we speak somewhere private?”
Her gaze narrowed. I could tell she was unwilling to find herself alone with the Black Mage. Not without knowing my relation in the matter. Not without knowing whether or not I’d told him the truth. Because if he knew, it would mean certain death.
Still, if Nyx voiced her reluctance, it would put the commander at the top of his list.
“Of course. My personal chambers would be best.”
We followed the commander down the passage and through the storerooms. The lowest level of the keep was also the coldest, its air made chilly by stone walls, untouched by insulating tapestries to keep away the frost.
After passing through a locked set of reinforced doors with another set of guards waiting nearby, we reached the commander’s personal chambers. She produced a ring of keys and paused, her hand on the door’s lock.
“I trust that you don’t need your guards to partake?”
She sought to limit potential witnesses.
Darren was quick to agree, but I was not. I did not trust the crown prince of the realm alone with the leader of the rebels. I’d never been privy to the secrets of the keep—who knew if there was a secret collection of mages and knights that she had already readied, waiting just beyond the commander’s walls to accost a threat before it became more?
“I will join you both.”
Darren gave me a raised brow, no doubt recalling his brother’s orders and thinking himself capable of meeting the commander alone, but he didn’t question my decision aloud.
Nyx looke
d anything but pleased.
“Very well. If you both would follow me.”
Paige let out an angry huff as we passed. She wasn’t pleased about being left behind; Henry at least trusted me to see to the prince. Paige did not trust anyone but herself.
She was the wisest of all.
The rest of our unit resigned to wait.
Commander Nyx turned the key and led the two of us into a large barren chamber. The draft wasn’t much better here than the hall beyond. Its furnishings were bare, save for a thick rug and the seating area on the left that included a long, rectangular slab of a table and twenty chairs.
One for each head knight in her squads, I assumed, to meet in private and discuss strategy before addressing the whole of her regiment in the open.
My eyes immediately studied the chamber for any hint of rebel activity, but it was far too plain to be incriminating.
I wondered if Nyx had one of her men do a quick sweep while we were in the hall. How many documents were being burned while the crown prince and princess were occupied? By the time Darren took up his investigation, there wouldn’t be a scrap of paper indicating their cause.
Darren didn’t miss a beat. “King Blayne has sent me to check on our northern post. The Crown recently discovered a rebel who was a former soldier of your regiment. I would like the keep’s full cooperation while I lead this investigation. I trust you can keep your own men in line.” He had used a similar train of speech for the lord overseeing Demsh’aa during our visit. The only difference was that man was a fool and had almost fallen over his round belly thanking a prince of the realm—he had seemed to forget his prince was also the Black Mage—for overseeing his town for that “rebel rubbish.”
“Of course.” The commander pressed her lips into a tight smile. “I will assist in any way that I can. May I ask who the rebel was?”
She was going to make him say it.
I swallowed back a mouth full of bile as I answered instead. “Derrick.” Darren didn’t know about Jacob and the other rebels who had been involved in my brother’s escape. They had never been identified, even the ones who died. All had been too careful to bear incriminating insignia or paperwork on their person.
The commander feigned a sharp intake of breath. “Your brother, Your Highness?”
“My little brother.” That you recruited and brainwashed into service to further your cause. I stared her down, letting the woman silently ponder how much I knew. I wanted her to sweat. I may have taken up her cause, but that didn’t make her blameless. Commander Nyx had used Derrick to use me, and I couldn’t help but think how even the so-called heroes had blood on their hands.
Every hero was a villain in the end. War was corrupting us all.
“We have already investigated his parents’ village.” Darren’s voice seemed to echo across the room.
My eyes flitted back to my husband.
“Ferren’s Keep was the next logical choice. Even if the rebels reside elsewhere, there is a good chance someone here knows how they were able to recruit. Her brother never served south, so it is highly probable that at least some of the rebels or their contacts reside north.”
“A very apt conclusion.” Nyx was nodding along, her shoulders relaxed, not one tense muscle in her stance. No wonder she had managed to keep her role so long without suspicion.
Then again, she was a highborn like her brother, the young advisor who’d overheard King Lucius’s plans so many years ago. And if there was one thing the Pythian duke had taught me, it was that every highborn could lie.
Ironic, really, that the leader of the rebels was a highborn that only recruited lowborns.
A short break of silence followed.
“I need a list of each unit’s men,” Darren said, “with their years of service. I need the names of the cities they transferred from, as well as any personal notes you or your guard find peculiar to their service. My team and I will start interrogating the first squad at dawn. Bring us the one Derrick was a part of first.”
“He received a promotion to Sir Maxon’s squad before he resigned from our keep. Maxon is returning from a patrol along the border. His men should be back in a week and a half.”
The prince shifted from one foot to the next. “Then bring us Derrick’s first. Perhaps someone there will have noticed a change before his promotion.”
“Certainly. We have a dungeon in the back of the keep, do you require such methods in your interrogation?”
Darren’s eyes went dark, and a bit of ice burrowed into my lungs. “I would prefer to question them before it comes to other… methods.”
But he would, if necessary. Darren had confessed that to me during our trip. He would do anything to protect his country, and if he had to hurt a man, or many, he would.
I had tossed and turned every night since.
I needed to make sure it didn’t come to that. If it did—it wouldn’t. This was why I was here. To lead the Black Mage astray. To keep the rebels safe.
To keep Darren safe from their blood on his hands.
“Then I will have them report outside the cell at first light. No other squads will be present. Is there anything else?” The commander’s eyes were on the prince, but I knew the question was for me.
“Private accommodations. And I want a row of cots for the rest of our unit just outside it. We will use our own guards.” My tone came out harsh and abrupt. It was reminiscent of Paige, and for the first time, I realized exactly how hard my friend’s station must have been, guarding a girl who believed she was capable of her own defense. There were people one inevitably let down their caution for, and they were the reason guards were needed.
I told myself I would make it a point to apologize the first chance I got.
Darren wasn’t safe, not until I had a chance to talk to Nyx and the others alone. I’d never felt so tense or alert in my life.
Lowborn modesties aside, I would sooner have the keep presume me demanding than allow Darren to sleep in a barrack full of armed men. Let them think I was the snooty princess from before. Blayne’s orders had given me all the leniency I needed. With Darren, my goal and the king of Jerar’s were one and the same.
I would play whatever role it took.
“King’s orders.” My smile was strained. “You understand.”
Darren was giving me an odd look; I didn’t sound like myself. I knew he would remark on it later, but for now, I kept my gaze locked on the commander.
“I’ll see that the two of you are given the chamber across the hall.” Nyx crossed the room to rummage through her drawers and produced a single brass key. “We reserve it for just this sort of affair. I would never want a prince of Jerar sleeping among the rest.”
I almost snorted, recalling just the opposite sort of reaction a year before. She had been most pleased that I had chosen to take up with the rest of the regiment’s women in the barracks, much to Paige’s outspoken disapproval.
The commander saw us back to the hall without incident. “I’ll have my men bring out cots for the rest of your lot.”
And here was my opportunity. “Thank you, Commander.” I grasped the woman’s wrist as she retreated, slipping a thin roll of parchment just under her sleeve. It was a move I’d practiced in the mirror that first night we arrived in Demsh’aa. It took all of three hours to perfect just the right twist of the wrist and shifting of my cloak.
The commander stiffened in shock but recovered far too quickly to voice her surprise aloud.
I’d composed the letter that same night. My mother had sewn it into my cloak with a bit of thread, and I’d worn the smelly thing ever since, refusing to take it off even for a moment. The last thing I’d wanted was for Darren or the others to find a mysterious letter hidden away in the paneling of my sleeve.
“Darren and I appreciate your cooperation in this matter,” I said hastily, taking a step back to stand beside the prince. “We hope not to take up too much of your regiment’s time.”
The woman sm
iled. This time there was a confidence that she hadn’t carried just a couple of seconds before. Nyx was an intelligent woman; she knew the paper held some purpose I could not speak aloud.
“I am more than happy to cooperate. I, too, have this country’s best interests at heart.”
Fifty minutes later, I made an excuse to Darren and the others that I needed to bathe despite the extremely late hour of our arrival. The stench of my cloak was enough to discourage any protest on the parts of our guards. Darren had been immersed in his scrolls, reviewing everything the Crown knew about the rebels in preparation for the interrogation that following morning.
Paige, of course, accompanied me. Luckily, however, we’d spent over a year at the keep and she had come to consider bathing trips a simple task.
I feigned a quick search of the bathhouse.
“There’s no one inside. I’ll be as quick as I can.”
My guard nodded along absentmindedly, her gaze locked on the dark corridor beyond. Rebels were far more likely to be stalking a princess in the halls, not hiding out in the unheated waters of an unoccupied bathhouse an hour past midnight. She trusted my inspection without question.
When I entered the building, Nyx was waiting in the shadows on the opposite dais. I knew she would come; the commander had far too much at risk not to.
The first thing I did was cast out a listening “wall.” It wasn’t foolproof, just a thick, stagnant wall of condensed air, but I wasn’t planning to shout.
I didn’t bother with the candles. If Paige took it upon herself to check on me later, I wanted the inside to be as indiscernible as possible.
“Your Highness—”
I held up a hand, stopping her. “Derrick told me everything.”
“Everything?”
“Before he was caught, my brother confessed the truth about this keep—the truth about you, the truth about the old king and Caltoth, all of it. At the time, I didn’t believe him…” I paused and looked her straight in the eyes. It was hard to see them in the dark, but I thought she looked scared. I wondered what she thought of me. “Every word out of his mouth sounded like something you had constructed to recruit naïve rebels.”
Last Stand (The Black Mage Book 4) Page 4