“Darren—”
“Imagine the worst mistake a person can make,” he hissed. “Two lives, Ryiah. Two soldiers because I was so sure of myself. Do you have any idea what that kind of responsibility is like?” His bark of laughter was grating against my ears. “Do you realize what I could have done?”
I did, but he couldn’t know the truth of Dastan Cove. Those three Caltothian warriors were my burden alone. I was carrying that guilt with every breath I took. I wanted to tell the broken prince it got easier if you screamed into the silence, but I still saw their ashen faces next to my brother every night I dreamt. There was no such thing as peace. “It wasn’t your fault.” You were right to suspect those men. We tricked you. The guilt was a festering plague in my chest. “Nyx was trying to do what she thought was best for her men—misguided, yes, but she truly thought a change in leadership, with the approaching war, would be a mistake.”
“Had we time, I’d disown her of the position myself.” The prince’s fist found the wall, and I watched as he pulled it away, dripping blood. “As it stands, I believe her men would riot if I tried.”
You wouldn’t be wrong.
“Their loyalty is strange.” He stared at the chamber door. “If I didn’t know better, I’d suspect there was more to this keep than it seems.”
I forced out a laugh. “Besides their united hatred of the Caltothians raiding their border?”
His brow furrowed. “I suppose—”
“I served at the keep for close to a year, and don’t forget our apprenticeship.” I stole a nearby tunic peeking out of a drawer, wrapping it around the prince’s bloodied hand. This time he didn’t jerk away. “The northerners look down on the south because of what they had to suffer. They can’t understand your role. They don’t know what it means to carry the weight of a country.”
“And you do?” The words were softer, barely more than a murmur.
“I know what it means to be in love with someone who does.” I pulled Darren toward the bed, promising myself I would pull back once that spark was gone, once those suspicions stopped dancing below the surface in those garnet eyes like tidal crashes of crimson in a darkening sea.
Two hands gripped my waist so hard it ached. I hadn’t finished wrapping Darren’s bandage; there was probably blood on the sheets, but I didn’t care.
“I don’t deserve you, Ryiah.”
“You aren’t the only one with darkness.” I pressed my palm to the prince’s chest. “I’m still fighting mine.” More than you can ever know.
Understanding and shame lit up his garnet stare. He was remembering Derrick.
“I’d rather hear your angry words than watch you hide in pain.” I touched the prince’s face, tracing his jaw with my fingers, memorizing the strong lines that made up the man I love. “Nothing you could ever do would turn me away.”
Darren caught my hand with his own, rough calluses enfolding my fingers in his. We were two warriors fighting for what we believed in and suffering our faults in silence. “Promise me the same.”
Too late. I nodded, not trusting myself to speak, refusing to speak the betrayal aloud. I let the dark prince pull me into the crook of his arms, and as he fell asleep—for the first night in days—I spent the hours counting cracks in the walls and the lies drowning my heart.
My eyes were locked on the tree line ahead. I just barely made out a growing cloud of silver on the heady orange horizon. Chainmail glittered against the morning sun and crystalline white of snow. Winter had come early this year.
As the squad drew closer, my stomach twisted and turned. Would Alex look at me the same as before? Would I see the hate that had shattered my heart?
It turns out, I needn’t have bothered.
“Ryiah!” My twin dismounted and ran the last twenty or so yards. Ice crunched under his heavy boots as he shoved past the rest of his squad.
I stood there, numb, as he pulled me into a giant embrace, crushing me against his chest. Alex smelled like iron and sweat—so different from before. When he released me a moment later, his gaze was earnest. I couldn’t find a hint of that festering rage from before.
I knew it was all for the prince. Nyx had already sent envoys to warn Maxon’s squad. But that didn’t stop his smile from warming my chest.
“Ry! Ooompf!” A second set of arms locked around the pair of us both. That reassuring voice had supported me every year of the apprenticeship. It was the voice of reason, one that promised not to take itself too seriously so long as I did the same. It was one of the best sounds in the world.
Ella’s arms were draped in heavy furs. How could I have forgotten her distaste of the cold? Her black curls brushed my face as she leaned in close, enveloping us both. “I missed you—we missed you. So much.”
I didn’t bother to reply. I just stood there, holding on to that moment. I didn’t want to let go. Letting go would mean it had passed, and I wasn’t ready to give it up to the rest of the world.
“Ella. Alex.” Darren was standing just behind us when we finally pulled away. I blinked back hasty tears, and for a second I could have sworn my twin did the same. “We missed you at our wedding.”
Alex brushed his dirty palms on his shirt. “After what happened… I couldn’t possibly return.”
“She explained your reasons.”
Alex shot me a look.
“You wanted to find the rebel who recruited Derrick,” I said quickly.
Darren continued. “I can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same, were it Blayne.”
“Your Highness,” Sir Maxon, the leader of Derrick’s former squad, stepped forward to introduce himself. “I understand you’re investigating our keep for rebels. Nyx sent envoys prior to our arrival. May I offer up my own squad at your convenience?”
“And here I was just about to ask.”
The man clasped the prince on the shoulder. “Think my men can grab a quick bite in the dining hall first? We rode most of the night.”
“I’ll join you.” The prince followed the knight, and the rest of us trailed behind.
And so began the first hour of the end of our stay.
Make it look good. Make it real. Convince Darren. Try not to think about the blood. Tallus knows his role. Don’t think about the pain you inflict. Think of how many his confession will save.
I backhanded the knight before using my other hand to pull him up by the collar of his shirt, rattling him against the bars. “Confess! Your comrades claim they saw you go off with Derrick alone. The innkeeper claims not to recognize your face. You were never playing cards. You were converting my brother and stealing supplies.”
I raised my hand again, telling myself flesh was better than the blade.
“Ryiah!” Darren caught my fist, dragging me away from our chained prisoner. “What are you doing?”
“He’s a rebel!” I was shrieking loud enough that our audience outside the chamber could hear. “Just look at him! This is the man that took my brother and made him one of them! Took him in with his lies and his status as a knight!” It hadn’t been hard to steer the investigation and then take over when Tallus started to stammer over his words. It was surprisingly easy, the words flowed from my mouth like a script. A small part of me admitted this was the way I had longed to confront Nyx the day I arrived.
Make it as emotional as possible and he’ll miss the lies beneath.
“He’s a rebel!” My lungs expanded and contracted with the heavy intake of air. “I know it, Darren. Just listen to him. Look at him!”
“You don’t want to make the same mistake as me.” Darren locked his arms around me. “Love, I’m going to take over now.”
“Don’t you dare set him free!” I clutched Darren’s arm.
“I promise this man will not leave the cell until I am thoroughly convinced—”
“Check his clothes. Check his belongings and his cot. Check his saddlebags! There has to be some proof. There has to be something to show!”
Darren’s grip tight
ened on my wrist. “You have my promise, Ryiah, but I need you to wait. Do you think you can do this?”
I growled my reply. “If it is him, I want to be the one to wield the blade. For Derrick.” I needed his promise now, before the truth was discovered. I needed to spare the prince this tainted act from his conscience.
“Is that what you really want?”
“It’s the only thing I ask.”
The prince nodded and then knocked on the prison door, summoning one of our men from the other side. “Check Tallus’s belongings. Don’t leave a boot unturned.”
“Right away, Your Highness.”
The prince closed the door and returned his gaze to Ferren’s Keep’s “only” rebel. “I hope for your sake my wife is wrong.”
The knight lifted a bloodied chin, a red bruise already starting to swell across his right eye. “You won’t find anything.” The words were resolute and full of spite. “You are making a mistake.”
Thirty minutes later, a knock sounded at the door.
“Your Highness, sewn into his pillow was a list. Your wife’s brother is one of the names.”
The prince turned to me. “Ryiah, I believe it is your turn.”
In my hand, I produced a blade.
Tallus confessed after a long night in the cell. It was one I’d never get back.
“There are no rebels in the capital!” Darren paced the dungeon. “All of them were caught during the attack.”
“That’s only what they wish you to think.” The man laughed, his whole body shaking violently against the corner of his cell as blood and saliva dripped down his face like a madman.
“Then tell me why they lie in wait. Tell me why they haven’t made a move.”
“They’ve been waiting for the Black Mage to leave,” Tallus spat, “so the king is unprotected.”
Darren charged the cell, and I snatched his arm before he could strangle the knight with his bare hands. “You lie! We have guards, hundreds—”
“Everyone knows the prince is hunting rebels north, even my leader in the south.” Tallus broke into a vicious grin. His whole mouth was crimson. “They know the king is unprotected. All it will take is one—”
The knight broke into a cry as Darren’s casting sent him sprawling against the prison wall.
“Darren!” I jerked the boy around so he was forced to look me in the eyes, instead of at the man he was attempting to kill.
“He’s talking about Blayne.” Darren’s eyes were wild and his nails were cutting into my arms. His pulse was beating wildly against his throat. “Ryiah, I—”
“We can’t kill him. He can help identify the rebels in Devon.” I took control of the situation, trying not to think of the man who had willingly suffered to help me perform this terrible lie. “We will send envoys right away. Your brother will be fine. Have Mira double the King’s Regiment and call Marius back from the south.”
I waited, feeling the grating pressure on my arms slacken. Then I addressed the prisoner. “You will reveal these rebels in exchange for your life.”
The man said nothing, his chest rising and falling as he fought back the pain of his latest blow.
“We will grant you a king’s pardon.”
“Never!” Darren tugged away, fighting my grip, but I refused to budge.
“This man will never betray his own without it.” My eyes were locked on his. “It may not be what you want, but surely one man’s life for the king’s safety is worth the price of revenge.”
“Fine.” The prince bit out the word and crooked his neck to glare at Tallus over my shoulder. “We grant you this, traitor, but if you fail to comply, you will be strung from the palace rafters like your brethren.”
It took every bit of resolve I had not to react to Darren’s threat. It was impossible not to remember Derrick.
“Yes.” The knight took a retching breath and forced his words into a command of his own. “But I will not say a word until the document is signed.”
Darren said nothing. Instead, he marched to the other side of the room and began shoving reports into a file. I had a feeling he wouldn’t sleep at all that night—he’d be studying those papers, searching for anything missed.
In a way, our reactions were one and the same. The things I did tonight, they would haunt my sleep for years to come.
When my twin finally arrived as part of the healers to clean up the mess, we could finally leave. Darren wasted no time in taking off.
Paige remained behind with me. I prepared for the look of outrage when Alex took in the scene before us—a beaten knight and the sister with his blood coating her fists.
Even Paige had to flinch and look away.
But all I saw was grief when Alex’s gaze met my own. And pity. He didn’t say anything as Paige stood nearby, supervising the healing. We needed the rebel “fit to travel but nothing more.” My twin’s expression was far better than I deserved.
I wondered what he would say now that he could see the price of my choice, the price of all of our choices in siding with the rebel cause.
I waited until Nyx knocked on the door, conferring the results of that night’s interrogation and distracting Paige for the moment I needed. “I am…” My breath hitched and I couldn’t speak.
The knight shifted against my brother’s casting, and his fingers touched my wrist. I started against the movement, and my eyes shot to Tallus’s face.
“D-don’t b-be s-sorry.” The words were crumbled and bare. “S-save u-us a-all.”
My brother placed his hand on top of Tallus’s and my own. “You aren’t alone.” His gaze conveyed everything he was too afraid to speak aloud.
I swallowed, my throat raw. My eyes stung from fighting so many tears. When did I become the villain of my own tale? Why should anyone place so much faith in a girl as flawed as me?
“I promise.” Could I honor that vow? Or would it—and all our dreams—go up in smoke the moment the lies fell away?
6
“It shouldn’t be you.” Ella’s beautiful face was splotchy and stained. “It shouldn’t be you, Ry.”
Darren and the rest of our guards were waiting by the horses while I said my good-byes. Alex stood next to his wife, clenching and unclenching his fists. He refused to say anything. He just gripped me tightly, his heart beating heavily against my own. Now that the rebel was healed enough to make the two-week trek to the palace, the Black Mage’s procession would be on its way.
I knew Alex regretted how fast things had come to an end and that he wanted to say more, do more—make amends. We’d shared two meals since Sir Maxon’s squad arrived, a bit of venison stew and then cold porridge the following morning, but there had been no opportunity to slip away. Not after Tallus. And now I was leaving. If looks could convey a word, then there was a story writing itself.
Some foolhardy part of me had hoped, upon hearing Darren’s plan for the keep weeks back at the palace, that I’d have the entire stay with my twin and his wife. But fate had a mind of its own.
So many tiny details were at play, and I knew it would be selfish to prolong a visit when the Pythian ships were closer to reaching our shores with every day that passed.
No, now I needed to focus on Tallus’s escape.
Freezing rain turned the entire mountain to slush. Snow melted away, leaving behind dark puddles and patches of ice. Mud splattered against our horses’ hooves, a splish-splash as the procession crawled up and down steep switchbacks on an ever-winding trail buried knee-deep in pine.
I couldn’t ask for better circumstances if I tried.
Storm clouds continued to roll across the cold winterscape, turning day into night and night into black. Thunder rolled in the background like the gods’ angry roar.
A couple more hours and we were forced to dismount and carry on by foot. Even war steeds weren’t immune to lightning, much less pelting hail and a slippery slope that grew worse with each step we took.
Eventually we were forced to make camp, several hours a
head of schedule, to wait out the worst of the storm. The King’s Road was adjacent to a meandering stream, one that had turned into a coursing river within the span of a day. It was a good source to wash in during the summer, but the current now was strong enough to overtake a man.
The group of us sat huddled around a hissing fire—it only held against sleet thanks to an alchemy potion that kept wood dry.
“Here.” Paige handed me an empty mug so she could pour steaming cider from a hot kettle nearby.
“Thanks.” I shot the knight a grateful smile before blowing on the steam and curling my fingers around its heat. The rest of our group was busy in conversation and Paige was never one for talk. Right this moment, neither was I. I was counting down the minutes, waiting for the moment my plan took effect.
“Do you think I should offer some to him?” The girl’s lips curled as her gaze slipped to Tallus, bound and gagged at the edge of our camp. “That filth that calls himself a knight.”
I flinched and made myself look away, focusing on Hadley, one of the mages who was preparing our dinner of dried herbs and hare stew. “He’s cold like the rest of us.”
“Humph.”
“It might prove useful if the prisoner doesn’t freeze. We need him alive.”
My guard grumbled as she poured another cup, cursing as she dripped hot liquid on her wrist, and walked over to Tallus with barely restrained disgust.
The only thing that spared Tallus of the fists of our party was the information he carried.
Two more hours, three at most. I made myself get up and join Hadley at the fire.
“Let me take over. I cooked plenty of meals for camp during the apprenticeship. You deserve a break.”
The Combat mage gave me a small smile. “It’s no bother. Cooking gives me something to do with my hands, and I’m never cold here.”
“Paige has a kettle of hot cider there.” I pointed to the second fire. “And truly,” I lowered my voice to convey my request, “I need a distraction. Thinking about that rebel after my brother…”
“Say no more.” The woman laid her rough hand on my shoulder and squeezed. “I will make myself scarce. Call on me if you need help.”
Last Stand (The Black Mage Book 4) Page 8