Amanda laughed and took off her top. I was surprised. I glanced down at the flat still on her foot. I would have bet money on her taking that off before going any further. She still managed to surprise me.
“That’s right,” she said, leaning forward again.
“It wasn’t just me being a crying girl to get out of the ticket, though,” I finally admitted. I sat back, uncrossing and crossing my legs. “It was actually an awful day. You know those kinds of days where you think if one more thing goes wrong, big or small, you’ll lose it? It was that type of day. So, when the lights flashed and the cop pulled me over, I lost it.”
I watched as Ethan nodded slowly. I could see him processing my words as if he were weighing in on them to determine whether or not he believed me. A part of me didn’t care what he thought, but the other part of me really wanted to convince him for some reason.
“Go on.”
“Well there’s not much else.”
“Of course there is! He pulled you over and when he walked up you were a sobbing mess.”
“Not exactly.” A thought had occurred to me and I had to work hard to keep a straight face, “It was actually a lady cop. She was really hot. It was summer and I was in a short, strapless dress. You wanted to know about the kiss, right?”
Ethan looked at me with shocked skepticism. He even leaned forward in his seat. I could practically see him squirming in his seat. I was satisfied with the result of my little made-up tale. It had been as easy as thinking of any cheesy porn scenario and throwing myself into it. I mentally patted myself on the back.
“You’re joking,” he said with squinty eyes.
I nodded slowly before laughing, “I am.”
It took a moment for him to frown. I knew he wanted to believe it, but it was just too unbelievable. He laughed anyway.
“You got me,” he smiled and rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, that was fun.”
“Never have I ever–”
“Excuse me! It’s my turn,” I objected.
“Oh, right. Oops. I guess I should pay the penalty,” he said as he pulled his shirt clean over his head and tossed it onto the couch.
“Never have I ever snooped through a friend’s bedroom,” I said. Admittedly, I was aiming for some sort of panty-drawer raiding from his youth, but then I saw his face change. I knew that wasn’t the sort of story attached to this question. He took off his other sock and looked up at me. I didn’t know if I should ask a probing question or not.
“I’m not someone who just snoops and you know I’m not down with invading privacy. One of my foster boys, he was a year older than me, seemed to really hate me. At first, I thought it was just the type of irrational hate middle school kids can have over dumb shit like popularity. But then he started spreading rumors and pushed a wedge between one of my friends and me. Long story short, he drove me to look through that friend’s stuff. It didn’t end well. At all.”
“Aw fuck,” I whispered.
By now I had gotten the hint that he didn’t like it when I looked guilty or apologized, but I couldn’t help it. There was no way for me to have known that question would bring up another painful moment in his past.
“Nah. Dumb kids do dumb things. That was a long time ago. So, let’s move on. Never have I ever had a surprise party thrown for me.”
I felt bad for him, but pushed forward. I couldn’t just feel sorry for him constantly. Clearly, it wasn’t exactly a sore subject if he was bringing it up. I wracked my brain and then recalled the only surprise party thrown for me. I took off my other flat and stared at Ethan.
“It was awful,” I told him.
“Why?”
“It wasn’t even for my birthday or anything. So that made it an even bigger surprise, but there was drama between two of the invited people. Then they tried to drag me into it. They got into a fight, and I mean full on punching and kicking. They knocked down this planter my mom had given me. She had painted the design on it herself. I cried and I yelled at them. They both stopped talking to me and to each other. And it was all over some fucking asshole guy of course.”
“Oh shit,” he said, “Now that was unexpected. Sounds like my kind of party.”
“Oh, shut up.”
“Only I’d be the guy they were fighting over and you’d be right there with them.”
“Oh, shut up!” I laughed loudly.
He was so full of himself, but still managed to have a great sense of humor about it. I would have never thought I could enjoy his company as much as I was enjoying it tonight. He was funny, open, and even surprised me at times. The fact that he even thought of this little game to mix things up impressed me. Most guys would’ve gone straight to the fucking.
I stared into his hazel eyes and admired how pretty they looked. I felt a coiling in my stomach; it was warm but I was aware enough to know it wasn’t entirely lust.
That was a problem.
An alarm sounded in my head and I decided it was time to push the course of this game in the right direction.
“Never have I ever been an asshole to someone I’ve slept with.”
“Damn, I should take off all my clothes now,” Ethan admitted. He glanced over at me and, for a brief second, I felt something different in how he looked at me. He stood up and unbuckled his belt, slowly pulling it out from the loops and dropping it to the floor.
“Never have-”
“Penalty! You just had a turn,” he called out.
I chuckled and reached behind my back to unclasp my bra, but then remembered my plan to keep this going. So, I stopped at the last second, stood up, and wiggled my thong off from under my skirt. I held it up and dropped it on his lap with a satisfied smile before plopping back down on the coffee table. I carefully crossed my legs to make sure he couldn’t enjoy any up-skirt view. I wanted to make him squirm with anticipation.
He picked up the thong with his finger and held it up. “Works for me. Kind of glad the penalty had to be called.” He said with a shrug and a smirk.
“Pervert.”
“Says the woman who took this off and dropped it on my lap. I’m onto you.” Ethan placed the thong back on his leg, “Never have I ever gone skinny dipping.”
“Really?” I was genuinely surprised for some reason.
“Yes, really. Now you answer.”
His gaze dropped down to my breasts like he was expecting me to take off my bra but, unlucky for him, I had never gone skinny dipping either.
“I’ve never done that.” He looked like I had just busted his bubble of happiness and I laughed.
“Never have I ever been paddled,” I said with a suggestive tone.
Then my stomach tightened after my heart dropped. The look on his face told me everything I needed to know. I instantly regretted my subject choice. I had meant it to be sexy, kinky, and drive the game forward, but instead it put a damper on everything. I felt paralyzed. I saw him gulp hard. He looked away from me. His eyes were fixed on something outside the window and his hands were clenched into fists at the sides of the chair.
What did I do? I was starting to panic. This wasn’t a situation I had ever found myself in before. Then Ethan took a long, slow breath and started to talk.
“I have, but I doubt it was in the way you meant. I was really young. It was one of the abusive foster parents I had—the woman actually. This wasn’t the same one that gave me the scar on my chest. It hurt like hell and it was her favorite form of punishment. The foster dad wasn’t bad. He was just completely absent and didn’t give a damn so he never did anything to stop her. She probably would have beaten the shit out of him if she could have. But he was bigger than her and she liked to prey on the weak. That’s the kind of person she was.”
“Ethan, I’m–”
“You don’t need to say you’re sorry every time something like this comes up, Amanda. How are you supposed to know? That’s just what my life was like growing up. I’ve come to terms with it. Honestly,” he paused and looked at me.
My stomach lurched when I saw the look in his eyes. There was actual emotion in them even though he was doing his best to mask it. His voice would never give it away but, unlike when he talked about his scar, his eyes did. My chest tightened. I didn’t know how to look or act; much less what to say. It was all so delicate and complicated. I hoped it was obvious in my face that I was compassionate, because I was.
“Honestly, you’re the only person I’ve talked to about this stuff. I don’t know why. I don’t know what it is about you, but that’s the truth. So, stop saying you’re sorry. Please.”
My chest tightened so much I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I gasped and looked up at the ceiling, drawing in as much air as I could. He was really opening up to me. He was being so honest it almost ached. I lowered my head to meet his gaze. It was unbelievable to me to be sitting across from this man who I once detested and be feeling the way I did now. There was so much more to him than I would have ever guessed. It seemed impossible he was the same man who had busted me in the nose and then insisted on taking me to the hospital. He’d been arrogant, annoying, and far too insistent. This was a completely different person sitting across from me now. This was someone I actually enjoyed spending time with. He was someone with a story and I was the person he’d picked to share parts of it with.
I gulped. I almost felt more nervous than I did on the plane ride to New York two years ago.
“Okay,” I said softly, “I’ll stop saying I’m sorry.”
“Good,” he said croakily. He cleared his throat and moved his hand, which brushed across the thong still sitting on his lap. He looked down at it and then back at me. “Where were we?”
“Never have I ever,” I muttered.
“Right. Never have I ever done this,” he said meaningfully.
“Me neither,” I told him.
The two of us looked at each other for a moment and then before I knew it, I was on his lap again. I barely even realized when I got up and straddled him, but we were kissing in a heartbeat. It felt different somehow. It was hot, like always, but there was something more to it. It was like we had forged a connection that could be felt in the kiss. I hiked my skirt up and rubbed myself against his pants.
There was a warm coiling in my stomach, but it wasn’t out of pure desire like it usually was. I felt a tug inside me when his lips pressed against mine. I felt a stirring deep within when I pulled back and looked into his eyes. I didn’t want to believe in the feelings I knew I had. I didn’t want to think what all these new feelings could mean. For a moment, just a fraction of a second, I hated that he came up with the idea for that game. It was supposed to be fun and sexy and stop at that. Instead, we swapped stories and shared plenty of laughs. There was a distinct chemistry between us now that was never there before; at least not like this.
Ethan ran his hands through my hair and kissed the corner of my lips. The look in his eyes made my chest tighten. I wanted to believe my pounding heart was because of desire coursing through my body. I didn’t want a relationship or any kind of feelings other than lust. I couldn’t go down that route. There was no way I could put myself through that again.
Ethan kissed my neck as I leaned my head back. I shut my eyes and focused on the feeling of his lips on my hot skin. He kissed the top curve of my breasts and brushed his lips against my nipples. The kisses trailed back up my chest. I felt his hand slide under my skirt and his fingertips graze my hot, wet center. I quivered under his touch and sucked in a breath through my teeth. Then, quite unexpectedly, he picked me up. He held me and planted his lips against mine before easing me down onto the coffee table. He moved my back to the other edge, my feet resting on top, and pushed my legs open.
He took off his boxer briefs and gripped his erection. He looked at me and stroked himself with an eager smile. I watched him, entranced for some reason. There was an intoxicating quality to Ethan. He looked deep into my eyes and smirked, but he didn’t look quite as smug as he usually did. My heart went still as he dropped to his knees and pressed a kiss to the inside of my knee. I held my breath. He was still stroking himself as he slowly kissed his way up my inner thigh.
He blew warm air on my wetness, making me tremble. I saw him stick his tongue out and swipe my inner thigh, as close as he could get to my center without touching it. I pursed my lips and held back a moan. He was teasing me until I couldn’t wait to feel his tongue inside me, his finger, any part of him. He was making me ache for his touch like never before. He looked up at me and pressed his lips to one of my hipbones. His tongue traced slowly along the length of one and then the other while his hand ran circles on the inside of my thigh, torturously close to my most sensitive area.
“Ethan,” I finally choked out.
He moved up and took one of my nipples into his mouth. He sucked on it gently, his tongue swirling around it. I moaned; it felt good but it wasn’t what I wanted at that moment and he knew it. He kissed up my chest, sucked on my neck, and then took my lips. I felt him drag his fingers all over my legs and lower abdomen as he kissed me deeply. No matter what, he wouldn’t touch where I wanted it the most.
“Please,” I breathed against his lips.
He looked into my eyes and I felt something tug inside of me again. There was no way he ever gave me that look before. I would have remembered it. He’d never kissed me the way he was kissing me tonight and he had never touched me the way he was touching me now. Everything was slow, teasing, sensual. All we had ever done before was raw and lustful. This passion was entirely different.
I loved it, but it scared me.
He washed away those worries by kissing me deeply and running his fingers slowly up and down my slit at long last. I broke the kiss and exhaled loudly and choked on my breath as I gripped his shoulders. He pressed the tip of his finger in past my entrance. It was just enough to work me up, but not actually penetrate me. He pressed his thumb against my clit, forcing a moan out of me.
He watched every twitch of pleasure on my face as he eased two fingers and worked them around slowly inside of me. It was a deeply intimate moment as I clenched my teeth and choked out a groan from the pleasure, looking into his hazel eyes. I could have sworn there was some sort of feeling behind them and I briefly wondered if that was mirrored in my own gaze, but I was interrupted by an intense wave of pleasure washing over me. Ethan had pushed a third finger in and was working them in and out of me while rubbing my clit.
I trembled. I clawed and panted.
“Oh, yes. Yes!” I cried out as I felt an orgasm take over my body. I tensed up and shook against him. He didn’t stop until my body went limp in his arms.
He eased me down to the floor before nestling himself between my thighs. I opened my legs and drew him inside of me. He brushed my hair, damp with sweat, back and looked deep into my eyes as he eased his length inside. That was a first for us as well. Everything about being with him tonight was different. It was intense and I wasn’t sure if it was a good thing or not.
But the pleasure coursing through my body as he started thrusting slowly in and out of me made me decide not to care. I just wanted to be in the moment. Now wasn’t the time to think about what his looks meant and why I was feeling something different. Now was the time to enjoy the satisfaction of him filling me up inside. He moved in and out of me, picking up speed, kissing me softly as he did.
Our kisses got messy, fervent. Our bodies rubbed against each other, skin hot and wet with sweat. I brushed his damp hair away from his face and admired his handsome, chiseled features. He held onto one of my thighs and shifted forward, pushing even deeper inside. He pulled me up onto his lap at an angle and I cried out when he hit the perfect spot. He thrust in and out of me, faster and faster, making sure to go deep and hit that sweet spot each time.
I felt the orgasm building in the pit of my stomach again. My skin felt like it was on fire. He thrust harder and faster; I bucked my hips to match his speed and rhythm. He grabbed a hold of my breasts and slowly dragged one han
d down to rub my clit. I shut my eyes and fisted my hands. It felt like every inch of me would explode with pleasure as the second orgasm hit me like a freight train. I wasn’t even aware that I was screaming, not even when he clamped his hand over my mouth to muffle the sound. He jerked his hips forward erratically before his thrusting stilled. I felt him pulse and twitch inside of me—filling me up inside with his own orgasm.
He collapsed on top of me and, for the first time, didn’t pull out of me right away. He laid on top of me for a couple minutes, our hearts beating together. He gave me a swift peck on the lips before finally standing up. He reached out and I took his hand to get up. I wanted to shower, but my feet took me to the bed instead. I plopped down on it, hoping to cool down.
Ethan walked to the bathroom as I stared up at the ceiling with a feeling of dread washing over me. My body was still tingly from the passionate sex we just had, but I couldn’t shake the anxious tornado swirling inside of my stomach. For the first time ever, I finally admitted to myself that I had feelings for him.
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