by York, Marie
“She lied. She’s been really sick.”
“No,” I argued. “She would have told me.”
“She didn’t want you to worry.”
Tears welled in my eyes, and I leaned against the nearest building, afraid that I would collapse. “What are you saying?” I asked.
“She’s…She’s dying.”
It didn’t matter that I had a building to lean against. My legs gave out, and I collapsed to the sidewalk.
“I’m on my way,” I said, and the phone fell from my hand. My head dropped into my knees. I took a deep breath, trying to suppress the burning emotion rushing up my throat, but there was no use. It was stronger than me. Sobs wracked my body, and I wasted fifteen minutes crying outside a Duane Reade.
I finally was able to get myself together and rushed home. Sebastian was already there when I came running in. He took one look at me, and he knew. “We have to go,” I managed.
He picked up the phone, and made a call. Everything was a blur. This could not be happening. We were so close to getting the money we needed. My heart pounded in my ears so hard, it was all I could hear. I needed to get my shit together. Zoey needed me, and I would not let her down. I had to fix this and I had to do it now.
“There’s nothing you can do?” I heard Sebastian say. “Okay. I guess that’ll do. I appreciate it.” Sebastian hung up the phone and grabbed his coat. “Let’s go.”
“Where are we going?” I asked. We didn’t have a car. It was the first thing we sold when we got to New York. We used it to pay for our first month’s rent.
“My boss is getting us a car so we can drive home. I tried to get his private jet, but his daughter has it down in St Barts.”
I was a fucking wreck. Everything was a blur as I threw a bag together waiting for the car to arrive. Thank God Sebastian was able to keep it together for both of us.
We got in the car a short while later, Sebastian taking the driver seat and me hopping in the passenger. We drove all night. Not even stopping to switch seats or take a piss.
It was early morning by the time we arrived at the hospital. Both of us ran in. I was still in my gym clothes from the day before, and Sebastian was still in his thrift store suit, but neither of us cared. We needed to get to Zoey.
We rounded the corner, and spotted my Dad with his head against the wall. He was only a few feet away, but getting to him felt like the longest trek ever. He turned as we approached, his dark eyes filled with anguish and grief as tears streamed down his face. In that moment, I knew.
“You’re too late,” he said, before breaking down into uncontrollable sobs.
It felt as if the world stopped spinning. It was like having a carpet ripped out from under you. Your body thrown up in the air, suspended above the ground, floating momentarily before crashing down with a thud.
I felt Sebastian’s hand on my shoulder, felt him pull me in for a hug, but it was like I wasn’t there. I knew he was trying to console me as well as himself, but it didn’t feel real. It couldn’t be. How could someone so full of life… die? It just didn’t seem right.
I didn’t hug Sebastian back. I couldn’t. I didn’t want to acknowledge what was happening. Once I did, it would be real and I refused to believe it. I stepped out of his embrace, and went toward the room Dad stood outside of. Zoey was in there. She was in there, and she was alive. I’d walk in, she’d yell “Psyche!”, and then I’d smack her with a pillow and yell at her to never do that to me again.
“Knox, don’t!” A hand wrapped around my wrist and yanked me away. I glanced down at it, and up to my mother. “She tried to hold on. She wanted to say goodbye,” Mom’s words cracked, and tears streamed down her already stained cheeks.
I yanked my hand out of her grip, and stepped into the room. “Zoey!” I said. She was lying in bed, and just had her eyes closed. She wasn’t dead. They had no idea what they were talking about. I went to her side. “Zoey, I made it. I’m here. Why are you scaring us like that?” I asked, taking her hand in mine and that’s when it hit me. Like a brick wall coming toward me at full speed. Her hand was ice cold and stiff.
There was nothing cold and limp about my sister. She was warm and so very alive. “No,” I said. “No, no, no.” Tears welled in my eyes as I shook her hand. “Zoey, wake up. This isn’t funny. Wake up, damn it. Wake up!” My legs gave out for the second time in twenty-four hours, and I collapsed onto the floor, clutching my sister’s hand to my chest. “I was too late. I’m so sorry. I was too late.” I hugged her hand, rocking back and forth, the apologies falling from my mouth.
A gentle hand rested on my shoulder, and I glanced up to Sebastian. His lip quivered, and then he collapsed beside me. He was just as devastated as I was. We hugged one another, Zoey’s lifeless hand between us, and we sobbed until there were no tears left.
Life as we knew it was changed forever.
Chapter 6
Mila
I stumbled in the door after a long ass night of lap dances and pole dances. My legs and feet were killing me, but I made an extra five hundred bucks this week. Once I had my coffee, it would sink in that all the extra hours I was working were totally worth it. Besides, it helped keep my mind off Knox. Off the fact that he didn’t even try to contact me once since I kicked him out.
It’s what I wanted. Or, at least, it’s what I thought I wanted. But, as the days passed and I didn’t hear a single word from him, I was beginning to realize I missed him. And it pissed me the fuck off. I didn’t miss anyone. That was an emotion that didn’t belong in my vocabulary.
But I couldn’t deny it. I craved his kisses, and longed to feel his arms wrapped around me. I even Googled him a few times just to see if there were any updates on his arrest, or any new pictures of him. I knew it was so pathetic, and I should have stopped myself, but I just couldn’t. I could deny all I wanted, but the truth was, I was falling for him.
It was seven, an hour later than I usually got home, but it was also Saturday, and Mackenzie didn’t need to be up for school. If I was lucky, she would sleep in, and I would have a peaceful morning. Maybe an uninterrupted nap.
I was grateful not to find any teenage boys camping out on my sofa like that one time where I nearly killed my own sister. She’d been behaving herself, something I wasn’t used to, and I was just waiting for the other hand to drop. When it came to Mackenzie, it was only a matter of time.
I made a pot of coffee, and, with my favorite mug in hand, sat down on the couch to watch some TV. My eyes were heavy as I tried to keep them open. If I just rested them for a little while, I would be good for the rest of the day.
A thump startled me, causing my eyes to open. I looked around the room, trying to get my bearings, and spotted Mackenzie heading toward the door.
“Where do you think you’re going?” I asked, rubbing at my eyes, realizing I dozed off.
“Out,” Mackenzie answered, and I sat up.
I glanced at the clock and nearly gasped when I saw the eleven. I had passed out for four hours. “Where is out?” I asked, getting up from the couch and walking over to her.
She rolled her eyes, and plopped her hand on her hip. I immediately took notice of her jeans and top. None of the jeans she owned look like that. Those were most definitely designer, and I had seen that shirt recently in a high end store window.
Where the hell did she get the money for those kinds of clothes? All I could think about was that bag of weed I found in her dresser drawer.
I latched onto the hem of her shirt. “Where did you get this?”
“What is your problem?” Mackenzie demanded, trying to rip the material out of my grasp.
“Are you dealing drugs?”
She laughed, and I wanted to slap the shit out of her. “You’re fucking crazy,” Mackenzie spat, and stepped around me.
I grabbed her arm, my fingers digging into her skin, and spun her back to me.“Answer me, dammit.”
It was my biggest nightmare. I wasn’t busting my ass on a damn pole for
my sister to become a criminal. It was bad enough she had to be bailed out of jail. I couldn’t handle if she did real time. It would be the ultimate proof that I was a complete and utter failure.
There were so many things I fucked up, and I didn’t want to be responsible for ruining my sister’s life. She just made it so fucking hard. Her attitude sucked most of the time, and I was sick and tired of constantly fighting with her.
Every day with her felt like World War III, and I knew. I fucking knew that her momentary truce was because she was up to no good. There was no way she could afford those clothes. Not even with the money that went missing out of my bag.
Her eyes narrowed, and her lip curled in defiance. “Why should I?”
My teeth clenched, and the veins in my neck pulsed with anger. “Are you?” I asked again.
“What’s it matter? You’re just going to believe whatever the fuck you want to believe.”
“Watch your damn mouth.”
“Oh, yeah, because you do. Maybe you should take your own advice.”
“Stop avoiding the question! Are you dealing drugs?”
She stared at me in all her rebellious glory. I refused to let her stare me down. I was older than her and, dammit, I made the rules in this fucking house, not her. She was a manipulative brat, and it was time for that shit to end.
“Tell me now, or you’ll be sorry.”
“Oh, will I? What are you going to do? Hit me? Go ahead. I dare you.” Her shoulders rolled back, and she stood tall. My fingers twitched, desperate for me to take her up on her dare.
“Where did you get these clothes, Mackenzie?”
“I bought them!”
Anger surged through my veins, strangling what little compassion I had left. I charged at her, my patience out the fucking window, and she screamed a high pitch blood curdling scream before picking up my mother’s vase and hurling it at me.
Chapter 7
Knox
Mila kicked me out of her place and basically told me to leave her alone, but, unfortunately for her, I was never a good listener. Nobody told me what to do, and, if I wanted something, I got it. Besides, it was a front. A wall she was hiding behind. For a second there, I thought maybe she was just a bitch, but then I remembered the look in her eye when we were both close to falling over the edge together.
There was vulnerability in her gaze that unbeknownst to her, she exposed to me. It was for the slightest of moments, a glint in the night, but long enough for me to know there was more to her than strip clubs and a bad attitude. She was a woman who pushed people away. It was defense mechanism. She kept people at a distance so she would never have to deal with the feelings they evoked from her. She was terrified of feeling anything for anyone. After the loss she suffered when her parents were taken from her, she built a wall so thick and deep in an effort to never feel that kind of pain again. I knew that line of defense all too well. I was the king of putting up fucking walls. But somehow Mila wormed her way into my heart and head and I found my walls breaking down. Now I was determined more than ever to knock that wall of hers down too.
I walked up the steps to her apartment, and, just as I was about to knock, the sound of shattered glass and screams resounded through the door..
What the fuck? Panic rose inside of me. My heart beat wildly in my chest as visions of Mila being hurt ran through my head. Fear and determination to protect Mila took over and, with one hard kick, the door flung open.
Shards of glass covered the floor, and two pairs of eyes stared back at me. Mackenzie’s eyes were wild and crazed while Mila’s seethed with anger. They only acknowledged me for a second before Mila leapt toward Mackenzie.
“That was our mother’s vase!” she screamed as her hand wrapped around Mackenzie’s shirt, and she yanked her toward her.
Mackenzie swatted at Mila’s hand. “I’ll buy you a new one. Now let me go, you crazy bitch!”
“Oh, that’s right. You’re Miss Moneybags now!”
Oh shit. Did Mackenzie tell Mila? And, if she did, did she tell her that I knew? A knot formed in my stomach, twisting and gnawing its way into a solid lump of dread. Maybe I should sneak out now before shit really hit the fan. But the screaming and accusations were like a ping pong ball going back and forth. My eyes followed the voices, waiting for the moment the ball dropped and it was all over.
“Well, I couldn’t rely on you to buy me anything!” Mackenzie screeched, her arms flailing, still trying to get away from Mila.
Mila’s lips twisted, her eyes filled with manic rage as she started to laugh. “I don’t buy you anything? How about a fucking roof over your head! A bed to sleep in? A toilet to piss in? Food to eat? Water to bathe? I buy you everything you need.”
“What about the things I want?” Mackenzie growled and finally managed to get away from Mila’s death grip.
“What about them?” Mila yelled, closing the gap Mackenzie created. “Life isn’t always fair. You don’t always get what you want. You learn to live without it.”
Mackenzie straightened and took a final step toward Mila until they were toe to toe. Mackenzie may have been years younger, but she was inches taller than her sister. She looked down on her with venom in her gaze. “Well, I don’t want to.”
Mila audaciously rolled her shoulders. “Well, too fucking bad, you ungrateful fucking brat!”
Mackenzie shoved Mila, causing Mila to stumble back into the wall, and knocking a framed picture to the floor. It fell with a shatter. A huge crack in the glass formed down the middle of the picture, and right between Mila and Mackenzie. Dividing them just like they were divided now.
It didn’t stop them from trying to rip each other’s throats out though. Mila went back at Mackenzie, so Mackenzie grabbed Mila’s hair, and started yanking on it. Mila shoved her hand in Mackenzie’s face and forced her away.
I’d had enough. When I first walked in, it was clear they needed to have it out. As a fighter, I understood the need for physical confrontation, which is why I didn’t interfere. But, if I let this fighting continue for another minute, there would be blood and the next thing to break wouldn’t be replaceable. Plus, I feared one of the neighbors might call the cops and that would not bode well for any of us.
So, I stepped in and went right for the middle, to pry them off of each other. I pushed them apart, but Mackenzie tried to leap back at Mila. I wrapped a hand around her waist, pulling her away.
“Put me down, you asshole.” She kicked and wailed, her foot missing my balls by only inches.
I held her, hoping she would wear herself out, but the girl was a feisty little thing. She wasn’t stopping for shit. Mila bent over, hands on her knees, taking deep breaths. Our gazes met and the vulnerability I once got a glimpse of was there again as she turned to the shattered vase on the floor.
“You done?” I asked Mackenzie.
“Put me down!” she demanded.
“I’ll put you down if you promise you’ll stop.”
“Always making deals, aren’t you?” she said, and my heart nearly stopped. Maybe she did tell Mila. Maybe Mila knew. No, if she did, the anger would have eventually turned on me. My secret was still safe. For now.
“Just stop,” I said, letting Mackenzie go.
“Mackenzie, get the broom,” Mila said, her voice weak and defeated.
“Get it yourself,” Mackenzie spat then walked out the door and slammed it.
Mila jumped up, and I grabbed her arm, halting her. “Just let her go.”
Mila didn’t even try to fight me. I kissed her forehead because, after all the intensity, I felt like she needed a little gentleness. I went to the kitchen to get the broom and, when I came back, I found Mila on her knees, picking up the shattered glass, unshed tears building in her eyes.
The girl didn’t show emotion, yet she was falling apart over an inanimate object. I couldn’t bear to see it. So, I reached down and took the glass out of her hands. I cupped her face and smiled.
“What do you say we get out
of here?”
“I can’t. I have to clean this.”
I stood up, and held my hand out to her. “It’ll be here when we get back.”
She took my hand, and I helped her up. “Where are we going?” she asked.
“I think it’s time I took you on a real date.”
Chapter 8
Mila
My throat was clogged with emotion, and, when Knox kissed my forehead, I thought I would fall apart. I took a deep breath, and forced it all back down. I didn’t cry. I hadn’t in years. Not since the funerals. Even then, it was only a few tears here and there. I didn’t deserve to cry and feel emotion. I deserved nothing because I should have been dead, too.
Knox guided me to his truck, and opened the door for me to get in. I grabbed on the door frame and hoisted myself up. He shut the door, and I glanced over to the backseat, remembering the last time I was in here.
Tell me you want me. The memory of his words echoed in my mind. Tell me you want my cock inside you. I could still remember the chill that ran through my body when he bit the sensitive spot at the crook of my neck. Tell me. So, I did and I meant it. Despite what I said after, I still wanted him as much as I did in that moment.
He got into the driver seat, and smiled over at me. It was a bright spot in my dark day, and gave me hope, which was dangerous. Hope might have given people something to hold onto, but it also destroyed them when nothing ever came to fruition. It was a torturous tease that had you chasing dead ends and disappointment.
“Where are we going?” I asked, trying not to stare, but finding it harder and harder not to.
“We’re in Vegas. Where else would we go? The strip, of course.” He winked with a ridiculously cute smile and damn it if that wasn’t the biggest fucking turn on.
“If you live in Vegas, you don’t go to the strip. It’s for the tourists,” I said. I’d lived in Vegas for four years now, and I avoided the strip like the plague.