by J. C. Hayden
“No,” I breathed quickly, choking back a stray sob. “I… I would never want that.”
Jack stared at me, his gaze going from stressed to angry to heated back to stressed again in the span of about thirty seconds. Finally, Catrina broke the tension by turning to me and grabbing both my shoulders.
“Hold on, Jack,” Catrina said to him, and he walked to the corner of the balcony, looking agonized, so Catrina could whisper to me. “Are you okay?” I sighed and then nodded. “If I go inside, can you have this conversation and still be okay?”
I swallowed. “Yeah, I think so.”
Catrina’s eyes searched my face and then she leaned in closer to whisper in my ear. “Don’t walk away, Talia. Remember those feelings just now when you came out here. Remember how you felt at just the thought that he would be with someone else. Don’t let him be with anyone else. You two belong together. If you have to take it slow, I know he’ll be okay with that. I know you’re scared.” I wanted to protest, to tell her I wasn’t scared, I just didn’t do relationships, but even just thinking it I knew it was a fucking lie. I was scared shitless. Scared of being hurt, scared of giving my heart to Jack and scared of him breaking it.
“Just don’t…” Catrina took a deep breath. “Don’t walk away again. Not for his sake. For yours.”
She hugged me, and I felt fresh tears sting my eyes that I tried to wipe away when she pulled back. After giving me one last, meaningful look, she raised her hands to swipe her thumbs under my eyes—most likely trying to wipe away my mascara—before she said, “Okay, Jack, I’m going inside.” He turned around quickly, and I saw him chewing on his lower lip, his fingers nervously tugging at the tie hanging loosely around his neck to complete his costume, the other still deep in his pocket.
When Catrina went back inside, Jack and I just stared at each other across the balcony for a long time. I had my hands crossed over my chest protectively, and I was shaking as much from the chill outside as the emotions and adrenaline coursing through me.
“You thought I was getting back with Rachel?” Jack took a few steps toward me when he asked the question.
I shrugged helplessly. “I didn’t know what to think. I haven’t heard a-anything from you in a week, and then when you said she was at the dinner, I guess I… I just assumed the worst, I guess.”
He was still slowly walking toward me, his eyes glued on my face, and when I hiccupped, he gave me the gentlest smile before turning serious again.
“I wouldn’t be with Rachel.” His voice was low and hoarse, and despite all the mix of confused emotions, heat flooded my core. “I wouldn’t do that to her or to me. I couldn’t be with her when all I can think about is someone else.”
I was walking toward him now, and when we met in the middle, I dropped my hands to my sides.
“Me?” I whispered.
The corner of Jack’s mouth lifted as he nodded. “Yeah, you.”
He closed the gap between us and took my face in his hands. “I’m sorry I made you think I was getting back with her.”
I shook my head as much as I could with him holding me. “I freaked.”
He kept studying my face. “You’re so beautiful.”
I laughed breathlessly. “I probably have mascara and eyeliner all over my face.”
“Only a little,” he replied. “Doesn’t take away from how stunning you are.”
“Jack,” I gasped.
“What?”
“Kiss me.”
As soon as his mouth came down on mine, I opened against him so he could slide his tongue in. He tasted like beer and something sweet, like lust and desire and a need so profound that it stole my breath. We were both breathing heavily through our noses as we each deepened the kiss further while I wrapped my arms around his waist and he gripped my neck.
“Fuck, sorry.”
Jack and I both jumped apart but stayed close when Carver walked out onto the balcony.
“Sorry,” he said again, holding up his phone. “I was just trying to call Michael.” He looked back and forth between us. “I’ll go out in the hall.”
When he walked back through the balcony doors, Jack turned to me and grabbed one of my hands.
“Come home with me.”
I sighed. I wanted to more than anything, but I still didn’t know if I was ready to go there with him, didn’t know if I was prepared to set my fear aside and let us go where we both wanted to go. What I did know is that I didn’t want to see him with anyone else, but I didn’t think it was fair to just be with him because the thought of him with another woman made me sick to my stomach.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I said.
“It might not be,” he said honestly. “But I don’t give a fuck. I want you.”
Chapter 13
“Jesus, fuck, you are so fucking hot.” Jack slammed me against the front door of his apartment, bending so he could slide his knee between my legs, and making me gasp as he bit my neck.
Jack had driven us back to his place like a bat out of hell, and the situation wasn’t helped by the fact that I had my hands on him the entire time. He zoomed down Beacon Street like it was a high-speed chase, and I prayed we wouldn’t get pulled over, especially because I was nibbling on his neck and his ear with my hands down his pants, stroking his straining cock.
He’d tried to stop me at first, telling me to hold on, that he had to focus on the road, but I couldn’t stop, the desperation for him after these weeks of sexual tension permeating every single one of my senses.
Jack ground against me at his door since I didn’t even give him the opportunity to turn the key before I was trying to unbutton his pants. His button and belt were hanging loose around him as I jumped up his body to wrap my arms and legs around him, and he shoved me back against the door, his hands sliding up under my black dress and gripping my ass to hold me close while his mouth ravaged mine.
I couldn’t get deep enough, close enough, and I was frenzied as I tugged at different parts of him, doing whatever I could to get at every bit of him.
Panting, Jack pulled back and said, “Okay, fuck, inside.” He grabbed the keys out of his pocket as I licked a stripe up his neck, and he groaned as he shoved the key in the lock while I sucked at the spot where his neck connected with his jaw.
“Hurry,” I breathed against his neck, and he growled as he moved both his hands back to me and kicked the door wide open.
He barreled through the door with me in his arms, kicking it shut after we went over the threshold and stomping in the direction of his bedroom.
Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.
I almost giggled at the thought, but then the wind was nearly knocked out of me as I was tossed on my back on his bed and he climbed over me, bracing his hands on either side of my head as he dipped low to kiss me again. I gripped the fabric at his waist and yanked him down so he was flush on top of me and spread my legs wide so he could fit there.
The kiss was wet and messy and frantic, both of us panting and moaning, nipping, biting, licking, sucking, desperate, aching, longing.
Jack pulled back so he could look down at me, and I laughed when he grunted and reached up to yank the Wednesday Addams wig off my head and threw it across the room. I was still smiling against his mouth when he dove back in, sinking his hands into my hair so he could move me how he wanted, get the angle that would allow him to go as deeply into my mouth as he could.
I was trembling with how badly I wanted him inside me, moaning into his mouth, and when he moved his hands from my head down and underneath my dress, I whimpered at the feel of him sliding my panties down my legs.
His eyes were heated and intense as he slid my shoes off my feet, methodical as he rolled down my thigh high stockings and tossed them over his shoulder. But we were both too impatient for him to keep slowly undressing me because all it took was another soft moan from me to make both of us start ripping at each other’s clothes.
It felt like not even a second had
passed before we were both naked, and I was lying on my back trying to catch my breath as he rolled a condom down his long, thick length. My mouth watered at the sight of his naked, fit body, muscles bulging and skin glistening with a fine sheen of sweat as his chest—spattered with dark hair—heaved while he looked down at me and soaked me in the same way I was doing to him. His dark brown hair on his head was disheveled, and I’m sure mine looked no less wild because of how both of us had gripped each other there at different times while we kissed. He looked gorgeous in the dim light of his bedroom, and in that moment, I didn’t think I had ever wanted him or anyone more.
“You take my fucking breath away,” he rumbled harshly before he leaned down to just brush his lips against mine.
Then he was sliding inside me, his mouth just a breath from mine and his eyes on me as he used one hand to guide himself to my entrance, his other arm braced next to me. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, but as he filled me up so completely, I tilted my head back, my eyes fluttering shut on a breathless moan.
He started moving slowly and deeply in and out of me, but it wasn’t enough. I wanted the ferocity of when we’d first gotten to his apartment, and even though the deep glides felt heavenly, I needed him to give me exactly what I craved.
“More,” I moaned. “Please, Jack, harder.”
He kept his eyes on me, and then he maneuvered so he could put his arms under my shoulders. I gasped when he rolled us so I was on top of him, straddling his wide form as he went as deep as he could go and released a strangled moan.
“Yes,” I hissed, and Jack nodded.
“Take what you need, baby.” His voice was gruff and hard and sexy as his eyes raked over my body above him. “Fuck yourself on my cock.”
Jack grabbed my hips as I put my hands on his stomach between my legs and shifted so I could find the perfect angle. Then he slowly thrust his hips up and I bit my lip to hold back a loud moan as he slid against that perfect spot inside me that so few had ever found.
I rolled my hips to keep the friction on that spot, and he kept thrusting his hips until we found this incredible, perfect rhythm that had me moaning at every thrust, every shift of my hips and his.
“Look at me,” Jack growled, and with all the strength I possessed, I forced my eyes open and looked at him beneath me, his eyes glued on me, stormy with arousal, his dark hair a shock against the white sheets. He was so unbelievably sexy, his stomach muscles flexing beneath my hands, and I cried out as he thrust up into me harder and I moved against him more frantically. I looked down to the spot where we were joined and saw wet streaks on the short thatch of hair above his cock and groaned loudly at the sight. It was so incredibly hot to see evidence of my arousal marking his gorgeous body.
I continued to ride Jack’s cock with everything I had, rotating, moving back and forth, bouncing up and down, getting every bit of sensation that I could. He slid his hands up from my hips to my waist and slowly up to cup my breasts. When his fingers gently tweaked and pinched my nipples, my back arched violently and I almost came. He kept his fingers there, teasing me, until he growled and yanked me down so he could suck one of my nipples into his mouth.
It was heaven, ecstasy, an exquisite torture that was so perfect I felt like I might die from it. If I did—if the pleasure killed me—my life would end on the highest note, a note I could never hope to reach again, the shrill chords of a shocking and boundless melody that would carry me off with it into the abyss.
“Fuck,” I moaned loudly. “Yes, Jack, god yes.” He wrapped his arms around my sweaty back, thrusting up into me as he alternated between each of my nipples, sucking hard as I tried to keep myself balanced on my arms above his head so I wouldn’t collapse completely on top of him and suffocate him. But my arms were shaking, and I didn’t know how much longer I could hold myself up with all the sensations pulsing through me. Like he knew I wouldn’t be able to keep myself there for much longer, Jack pushed me back up so I was riding him again. He grabbed one of my thighs with one hand as I ground down on him, my walls pulsing and clenching around him as I approached the peak, and with his other hand he reached between my legs.
As soon as his thumb brushed my clit, I screamed, letting it tear out of me and echo off the walls of his bedroom. It felt so impossibly good, his cock filling me up, his thumb brushing the most sensitive part of my entire body, and I knew I wouldn’t last. I didn’t want it to ever end, but the train was barreling down the tracks, and I could feel myself coming apart.
The things this man could do to me… I couldn’t even put it in words what he had the ability to do. If I thought for one moment that I ever could’ve lived with this—without him—that I could’ve walked away from him forever, I was insane.
“Yeah,” Jack encouraged, his eyes on me.
I moaned his name. “Only you do this to me,” I said in a strangled voice. “No one makes me feel like you do.”
At my words, I felt Jack’s cock thicken inside me as he sped up both his thrusts and the movement of his thumb while I answered in kind, jerking my hips against him until I felt his warm heat flood the condom, his neck straining as he let out the sexiest moan I’d ever heard. I couldn’t stop moaning and whimpering as I followed him a moment later, my climax setting off a powerful reaction inside me that had my blood pumping through my veins, causing my body to radiate heat as I kept on thrusting against him, trying to keep the sensations that felt incredible.
The chords reached their apex—the beautiful music we made together reached its peak—and it felt like a it would never end. The strings of the bow rattled and shook, trembling along with me, and when I reached that final note, it felt like the sky was opening up. Our harmony combined into a seamless melody as we floated along together on the waves of euphoria.
Finally, I collapsed on top of him, and we both breathed heavily, trying to calm down and return to ourselves after such an intense moment between us.
After a while, I rolled off Jack and kept on panting in the bed beside him, staring up at the ceiling, one arm above my head and the other between Jack and I, brushing his hip gently.
Without a word, Jack turned and sat up, his back to me. I heard him taking care of the condom and saw him lean over to toss it in the waste basket under his bedside table. I thought he was going to lay back in the bed next to me, but he stayed sitting there. I felt strange and vulnerable as I stared at his back, and it didn’t take me long to realize why.
I wanted him to ask me to stay.
Jack had been the only man I’d ever stayed in bed with. Every other casual hookup I had since him, I either left or made him leave after. It had become so much the norm for me that it was almost like muscle memory to roll out of bed and put my clothes on when we finished.
I wasn’t ready to leave this time. I felt like Jack and I had finally broken down an important barrier tonight. After he saw how I reacted to the thought that he would get back with Rachel, there was no use hiding how I felt about him anymore. I wanted to be with him, and I couldn’t pretend I didn’t. I knew I’d said earlier that I didn’t know if I was ready to give him more, that I was too damn scared, but I knew I didn’t want to be with anyone else, maybe ever again, and even though I wasn’t eager to name what we were doing, I still wanted to do it.
And that’s why Jack’s quiet words almost shattered me.
“I won’t get mad if you want to leave. If you want to go, I’ll respect that.” He paused. “I just don’t want to watch it.”
I sucked in a shaky breath as silence settled over us at his words. They turned me inside out with the pain I heard behind them, and in that moment I realized that I wasn’t the only one who was afraid.
My stomach was churning when, finally, I whispered, “Would you be mad if I stayed?”
Jack whipped his head around to look at me. He looked wary but hopeful, and I wanted to drag him to me.
“No,” he breathed, huffing a small laugh as he turned more toward me. “No, I wouldn’t be mad if you s
tayed.”
We both grinned stupidly at each other as Jack crawled back into the bed with me. I felt light and carefree in way I could never remember feeling, and I wanted to cling to that feeling. Jack pulled the covers over us as I draped myself over his chest and put my ear next to his heart so I could hear the slow, steady thump in my ears until we both let sleep claim us.
Chapter 14
The sound of the toilet flushing woke me out of a deep, satisfying sleep.
Jack’s bed was without question the most comfortable bed I’d ever laid in, and that alone should have been reason enough to stay in bed with Jack when we were together weeks ago. I’d missed out on having a chance at this beautiful white mass of fluff and relaxation, but luckily I was here now, thick blankets and sheets spread on top of me as I luxuriated in the soft fabric, writhing almost like I was making a snow angel in his sheets.
I heard the sound of the faucet and expected Jack to come through the bathroom door when he turned it off. It was early morning—probably around seven if the way the light streamed in was any indication—and Jack and I had only finally gone to bed about three hours ago.
After the first time last night, I’d fallen asleep draped over Jack, and I couldn’t have been asleep long before I felt Jack’s hand just gently caressing my ass. It wasn’t even really a sexual gesture, but when he saw me waking up, he’d slipped his fingers into me from behind, toying with me until I was panting as I came and then flipping me on my stomach and fucking me until we both came again. We’d both adjusted in the bed with every intention of going to sleep, Jack spooning me from behind as I pulled his arms tightly around me, loving the way his thick, strong arms felt holding me close. But after a while, his breath on my neck made me shiver and I’d shimmied against him to get even closer. When his cock hardened and nudged my ass, I’d lifted my leg back and over his to spread myself out as he reached behind to the table next to his bed to grab a condom. We stayed in the spooning position as he slid inside me and thrust slowly in and out, over and over for a time indeterminable, kissing me over my shoulder the entire time, taking me to a height of pleasure I didn’t know existed. It was like we were starving for each other, unable and unwilling to sleep until we got our fill because even though it had been less than six weeks since our lunch date and the sex that followed, it felt like the sexual tension had been building ever since, only to finally combust between Jack’s sheets.