by Mack Maloney
They were still arguing as their two-man contraption fell to the hard floor. The confusion was hilarious.
Hunter just shook his head as the two men scurried away, still arguing with one another. Then he turned back toward those in the court and performed a dramatic bow.
That's when the trapdoor beneath his feet opened up…
It seemed like he fell for ages.
He was in a tube, sliding, round and round, pitch black, the sound of running water filling his ears. Just when he thought he couldn't get any more dizzy, the tube ended, and he was deposited into huge tank of inky black water.
He went all the way to the bottom but was able to quickly push himself back up to the top. No sooner had he surfaced when Dr. Zoloff came flying out of the tube, landing right on Hunter's head and carrying him back to the bottom again.
There was a moment of disentangling themselves and then they both made their way back up for air. Hunter swam over to a point under the tube, hoping against hope that maybe Ping's men would throw Annie—beautiful Annie — down as well. Even at this uncertain moment, Hunter found his thoughts flash to an image of her in that see-through gown, soaking wet. He shook off a chill that had nothing to do with the temperature of the water. He hoped Zoloff couldn't read minds.
"They will not send her down here with us," the doctor told Hunter, who nearly snapped his fingers in disappointment. "They will bring her instead to see her true love — before he is executed. That was Ping's dastardly plan all along!"
Hunter had to take his word for it. "That will just make it easier for us to rescue them both!" he yelled back to Zoloff boldly. "We've just got to get out of here first…"
At that moment they heard a huge splash on the other side of the thirty-foot tank. Then came another, and another.
What the hell could this be? Hunter wondered. He got his answer a moment later, delivered with a painful punch to his jaw. It was the second such shot he'd taken in the past few minutes.
The haymaker came out of nowhere and knocked him below the surface again. That's when he first saw the guy with the fins on his back.
Even underwater, this guy's uniform looked, well… unmanly. Tight, green, with fake gills and ridiculous fins, obviously its owner was the cause of one of the splashes they'd just heard. This meant at least three of these aqua-men were in here with them.
Hunter stayed down this time, diving deeper and looking for a swirl of legs above. Sure enough, he could see three dark figures heading toward a fourth; the strangely dressed swimmers were converging on Zoloff.
Hunter pushed himself off the bottom of the pool again and, moving swiftly, fists put together, he torpedoed one of the fin men just as he was about to hammer the good doctor. He hit the guy square on the back of the head, and his victim let out a yelp so shrill, Hunter actually heard it underwater. He surfaced an instant later, coming over the top with one fist cocked. One of the swimmers had Zoloff by the throat. Hunter clocked this guy on the way down. He, too, let out a yelp that would have seemed more appropriate for a young girl and not a big bad fin man.
With his two colleagues quickly out of action, the third swimmer splashed around for a few moments, assessed the situation, then turned tail and started swimming away. Zoloff was furious and began pursuing the man, but Hunter caught him at the last moment.
Hunter said to the doctor, "If we let him go, then he will lead us to the way out."
Zoloff thought a moment and then smiled, a rarity.
"You are more brilliant than my son-in-law-to-be!" he declared.
Then they both dove back below the surface and began swimming after the fleeing fin man.
There was one light in the vast tank. It was located next to a metal door, which Hunter could only surmise led to an air hatch.
He and Zoloff held up a moment and watched the swimmer desperately turn the wheel on this door. It took some effort to open it against the water pressure, but finally it did spring free with a great whoosh of air bubbles.
The swimmer tried his best to delicately swim into the hatchway, but Hunter and Zoloff had other ideas. They hit the man with both barrels just as he was closing the door. The fin man was more stunned than hurt. Hunter pushed him out of the way, finished closing the hatch, and then activated the oxygen valve. The water quickly drained from the chamber, and finally he and Zoloff could breathe again.
It was cramped quarters, and awkward now with Hunter, Zoloff, and the fin man fighting for elbow room. Hunter hauled back and was about to fire a punch at the swimmer, but there was no need. The man fainted dead away even before Hunter threw the punch.
"Bravo!" Zoloff yelled. He studied the man soaking and crumpled in the corner. "Should one of us take his costume off, then put it on, in hopes of fooling any guards we meet along the way?"
Hunter looked at Zoloff, then at the unconscious fin man, then back at Zoloff.
"That won't be necessary," he said.
They stole out into the adjacent corridor. It was lit by torches that smelled of wax and oil. The floor was flat in both directions, giving no indication which way was up or down. So they just stopped and listened. To their right, they heard music. Distant, discordant. And with a lot of bass. This told Hunter it was coming from somewhere above them. To their left, they could hear mechanical noises and groaning. The dungeon had to be that way.
They began running. And running. And running… Finally, the hallway started to curve downward. The sound of machinery got louder, the air, cooler.
They came to an intersection of hallways; Hunter skidded to a stop just before the two tunnels met. They both peeked around one corner and saw two prison cells, with six guards out in front of each. Maybe we should have taken the fin man's costume, Hunter thought.
He needed a moment to dream up a plan here. How were he and the feisty but elderly doctor going to take on a dozen of the walking trash cans?
Zoloff had no such inclination to wait, though. He stepped out from behind the corner, let out a great scream, and started running headlong down the hallway.
"Damn," Hunter said, springing to his feet and quickly finding himself on the doctor's heels. So much for getting a strategy together.
The soldiers saw them coming now; they had about fifty feet separating them. They aligned themselves at twelve abreast, spears up and ready. The doctor never hesitated. He left his feet ten paces in front of them, and with remarkable agility, laid out half the guards with a perfect running block. They went down again like dominos.
Those not hit by the initial blow were thrown off then-feet by those who were. In seconds, the doctor was wrestling with all twelve of them, at the same time yelling to Hunter, "Don't worry about me… I've got them covered. Save the others!"
It sounded crazy, but Zoloff was right. He'd bowled over all of the guards, and they were now engaged in a massive slow-motion wrestling match with him. Hunter body-slammed a couple of the soldiers on the periphery of the action and then turned his attention to the first prison cell.
Annie was within. She was lying straight as a board on a small bunk. Hunter called to her, but she could not hear him. She was obviously still under some kind of hypnotic spell. She wasn't going to be much help in her own rescue.
The cell door was locked. Hunter looked back at the mass of sprawled arms and legs on the floor and knew it would be impossible for him to find which guard had the keys. And while Zoloff was still remarkably holding his own, that might change at any moment. But how could he get into the cell to rescue Annie?
His mind went back to when he first landed in this weird place — how the rocket ship's door nearly came off in his hand. And later when the tin men's spears had gone through the fuselage. And how these so-called soldiers were so easy to defeat — when there wasn't an unlimited supply of them, that is.
That's probably when it finally sank in what this place was all about. It wasn't about armies, or prisoners, or observatories, or castles in the sky. It was about weakling soldiers, damsels in distress
, and worlds to be saved. It was Adventure Land! A place custom-made for heroes.
So he looked back at the cell's bars and thought, What the hell? He put his hands on them and with all his strength began to pull on them. They parted like rubber.
Hunter was soon inside. Annie was still out of it, eyes wide open, looking into space. Hunter tried to revive her, but no amount of gentle shaking would do the trick.
He tried to lift her off the bunk, but she was literally stiff, so much so he could never have gotten her through the space he'd created in the bent bars. What's worse, outside he heard indications that the tin men might be turning the tide in the battle against the doctor.
Time was running out. He had to get Annie up and moving. So he did what he thought any hero would do: he kissed her, long and hard on the lips. She woke right away, took one look at him, and jumped off the bed. She was quickly glued to his side once again.
He carried her out of the cell just as a few of the wimpy soldiers were getting their footing back. Holding Annie with one arm, Hunter began punching the recovering soldiers with the other. Between these blows and a revived Zoloff, they were able to knock over the lot of them again.
"Time to go!" Zoloff announced. Annie squeezed Hunter, showing her full agreement.
But Hunter stopped them both in their tracks. "Aren't you forgetting someone?" he asked.
Father looked at daughter, and daughter looked back.
"Your boyfriend," Hunter had to remind them. "I thought he was locked up here, too."
They all turned back toward the second cell. Once again, Hunter quickly parted the pliable bars. Lying on a bed inside, stiff as a board, apparently suffering from the same hypnotic spell was a tall, dark, and handsome man, approximately Hunter's age.
"Please, we must revive him!" Zoloff said, suddenly up to speed again.
Hunter laughed. "Don't look at me."
Annie timidly left his side, walked quickly into the cell, and planted a kiss on the sleeping man that lasted no more than a tenth of a second. The man leaped off the bed, hugged Annie, hugged Zoloff, and shook hands heartily with Hunter.
"Buck Gordon, at your service!" he said with a bow.
Then he took a look at the guards who were recovering yet again — and suddenly bounded from the cell. Hunter, Annie, and Zoloff started off after him.
"Maybe he knows the way out!" Hunter cried.
"Or he's running away," Annie replied. "Again…"
They ran. And ran. And ran…
At points along the way they actually lost sight of Annie's husband-in-waiting. The corridors were murky and winding, with only a few odd torches available to light the way. They were also covered with great swatches of torn, dingy silklike material, held together by long pieces of silver twine, remnants, no doubt, of the palace's former glory. Between the dirty silk's ghostly flowing and the darkness in the hallways, it was impossible to determine if they were running up or down. Every so often they would hear the unmistakable clanking of the tin soldiers in pursuit. But with just a little more effort, those sounds were quickly left behind.
Finally they reached a ramp of sorts that went nearly straight down. At the end of it was a huge door built not into the wall but into the floor. They all skidded to halt in front of it.
"I heard them talk about this door," Buck said. "As a way out, in case anything happened up above."
It seemed a little too pat for Hunter. But then again, what didn't in this crazy place?
He studied the handle on the hatch. It looked old and elaborate and immovable. Yet when Annie simply reached down and gave it a twist, it opened easily.
Everyone stepped back and let Hunter actually pull the door open. As soon as he did, he was hit with a great burst of air. It stunned them all. Hunter instinctively moved the others back. Then he took a look at what was beyond the door. The simple answer was: nothing.
They were looking down through a cloud to the rough terrain of the strange little moon about a half mile below.
"Damn," Hunter breathed. "This place does ride on the clouds!"
At that instant, they heard the unmistakable clanking of the palace soldiers coming toward them.
"We're trapped!" Zoloff cried.
Hunter was still looking down through the hatch at the ground below. This was weird. He'd seen just this type of thing at least once before.
"They'll kill us all this time!" Annie cried. But Hunter didn't think so. He figured it was about 2,000 feet to the ground, maybe less. And what was the most heroic thing he could do at the moment?
"Get some of that stuff off the wall!" he yelled to the others. "Some of those cords, too!"
Hunter wasn't really sure how to make a parachute. But how hard could it be? Lots of fabric, lots of cord to serve as the control lines, lots of time before the plodding soldiers finally tracked them down.
They all worked quickly, gathering the silk and attaching the cords. They soon had two huge things that looked like parachutes, sort of.
That's when they heard the soldiers at the top of the ramp. The clanking was at first loud but quickly became almost deafening. There were hundreds of the metal men coming at them now. Hunter didn't hesitate. He put Zoloff and Buck together under one chute and with little ceremony, pushed them through the opening.
Then he grabbed Annie and stepped into the abyss himself.
The two parachutes worked like a charm, of course. They rode the gentle air currents, expertly spiraling to the ground below. Zoloff and Buck came down in a bit of a heap; luckily, a soft meadow was their landing pad. Hunter and Annie came in standing up. As soon as their feet hit the ground, the silk chute fell down around them, covering them. Annie took the opportunity to plant a passionate, tongue-lashing kiss on Hunter that ended only when the chute finally passed over them and blew away.
Hunter tried to stay cool, but it was not an easy thing to do with such a gorgeous girl in his arms. He looked back up at the aerial palace. Never did he think he'd find a floating city here. They moved down the meadow to a grove of trees. It gave them both cover and shade. They sat down and got their heads together.
The adventure now seemed complete. Buck was rescued, and Annie was safe. Hunter thought it was time to get to the business of his being here. He pulled Zoloff aside and explained how he'd learned about this place and how it was important that he complete his mission. Zoloff could only shake his head though. Such things still did not compute. Hunter retrieved the Mad Russian's image again and once more asked Zoloff if he had ever seen or heard of the man.
Try as he might, the good doctor just could not reply.
The disappointment must have shown on Hunter's face, because Zoloff asked him, "Your visit here has not been a success then?"
Hunter looked over at Annie, who was reluctantly gravitating toward Buck.
Hunter just sighed. "It wasn't a total failure," he said. "I guess…"
Zoloff did know where the ticket booth was, though, the place Hunter had to go to get on the next ride. Lucky for him, it was just over the next hill. Hunter shook hands with Buck and Zoloff, then he turned to Annie. Of the entire adventure, she looked the most beautiful at that moment. He gave her a very platonic hug. Still she managed to slip a note in his pocket and give him a peck on his cheek in return.
Then he bid them good-bye. They went one way, and he went the other. It was only after he was sure he was out of sight that he reached into his pocket and took out Annie's note.
It read, "Next time, take me with you."
4
Hunter found the ticket booth just where Zoloff said it would be: over the hill and atop a small rise not a half mile away.
He had trudged up the side of the rise to find a lush valley on the other side. It seemed very inviting. Green grass, swaying trees, sparkling rivers flowing through it. On a whim, he blinked his eyes, but the valley was still there when he opened them again.
At the top of the rise he found a small hut, just big enough for him to fit inside. It w
as built with the same fake wood. It had the same noisy planks. Above the door was a hand-painted sign in Russian: Dobro pozalovat v Dom Uzasov. Tvoiy strashnü prazdnik cranet pravdoi. Otkroi — esli osmelishsya! According to the quadtrol, it read:
Welcome to the House of Horrors, Where Your Worst Fears Come True. Enter Only If You Dare.
"Sounds promising," Hunter whispered to himself.
Inside the hut he found the same kind of ancient personal computer. He went through the ritual of turning on the PC and getting it to accept his English-language password. A prompt told him to insert his ticket. He did as instructed, the ticket quickly returning to him with a second hole punched in it. The picture on the back was even more faded now. But if anything, the Russian looked even more insane.
He made his way through the security walls, filling in the final fields just as he had done the first time, by typing in his name and stating his hobby was flying.
But before he pushed the Enter button, he turned and looked back into the valley from which he'd just come. This strange place. A moon that was not really a moon, orbiting an enormous planet that really wasn't there. He'd been warned to expect weird things down here, but some things he encountered weren't exactly that weird.
True, this particular moon was a place custom-made for heroes. A world of altered reality, activated, he guessed, after hundreds of years of lying dormant. But there were some startlingly familiar images here as well. A city that floated on clouds. Armies that marched endlessly in its streets. An emperor who in the end didn't have a clue. It was practically a blueprint for the current Fourth Empire, if written by a child.
Was there a connection? Or was it just a coincidence?
Hunter didn't know, and at the moment, he didn't have the time to even think about it. He had to get going.
He returned to the computer and paused for just one more moment. Reaching inside his pocket, he took out Annie's note and read it again.