by John McShane
‘She laughed, “I don’t feel much like laughing. There’s so much pressure, I don’t want to let anyone down.”
“‘You won’t. You have inspired millions of people around the world with your singing, and you mustn’t let a few silly headlines ruin it for you. You’ve enjoyed the show haven’t you?”
“‘Oh yes, of course. I’ve been living my dream.” I believed her but was still worried for her.
“‘You going to be OK tonight?” She didn’t hesitate. “Yes.”
‘Later that night, Susan walked on to the stage and unleashed a magnificent new version of “I Dreamed A Dream”. I was staggered by how confidently she sang. After the extraordinary rollercoaster she’d been through, I genuinely feared it might all end in tears at the final hurdle, that she might crack under the maelstrom of attention and expectation.
‘But she didn’t. She nailed it. To my shock and dismay, though, there were a few boos in the audience when I suggested in my critique that she should win the show.
‘I realised then that she probably wouldn’t win, that the bubble had indeed burst right at the last minute, that the British public – as Simon had feared – had grown a little bored and irritated by Boyle mania…’
Morgan continued: ‘And Susan was fantastically generous and modest in defeat, while reserving the right to do one last wiggle on stage.
‘The next day, I was asked to call Susan because she was “exhausted and upset”. We spoke for half an hour, and she admitted, “I’m so tired, I need to get away from all this for a while.”
“‘You were brilliant last night,” I said. “I didn’t win, though. Will I still be able to have a career as a singer?”
“‘Of course you will,” I replied, truthfully. “And remember that your dream was never to win this show, it was to sing professionally.”
“‘That’s true, it is. It’s all I have ever wanted to do.”
‘She was undeniably jittery and erratic in that conversation. There was laughter and tears, excitement and sadness. She had been through an unprecedented two months.
“‘Are you glad you came on the show?” I asked.
“‘I am,” she said. “Even the way I feel now, I am.”’
Morgan was to add elsewhere, ‘It is probably a good thing all round that Susan didn’t win and can be under the radar for a bit. It is not a very serious matter, she is just exhausted and needs some rest.’
That view was echoed by Amanda Holden, who said in a television interview, ‘I understand that we’ve spoken to her doctors and they really have reassured us that there are no underlying mental issues and it is purely just that she’s knackered, for want of a better word.
‘And I think as we all keep saying, to have been thrust into such a media circus for seven weeks – it’s hard enough for me, Piers and Simon to deal with, let alone somebody that’s had absolutely no experience.’
She defended the way contestants for the show were assessed and said more psychological screenings of contestants would be impractical. ‘You can’t kind of give every single person who’s just an auditioner that kind of long-winded attention,’ she told GMTV.
‘But I think that what was done for Susan was the right thing to have done. I know that they’ve kind of checked her out and they’ve spoken to people in her village and there was no reason that we needed to check her for anything else, and I still agree with that.
‘All these shows take great care, and there are rules and standards that we all have to stick by. And I know that we care very much about Susan and so the right people are looking after her now.’
And she was to add, ‘It’s taken its toll on her. She’s gone from a woman who nobody knew to worldwide fame. For anybody in the business to handle that kind of stress is an enormous pressure and she probably has just crumbled under it. She will just need some time to recuperate, to rest. Actually, it’s probably a blessing that she didn’t win because the spotlight’s not so heavily on her.’
Scotland’s First Minister Alex Salmond, who had been sending messages of good luck to Susan during the past weeks, was also concerned, saying BGT should ‘probably’ take better care of its contestants.
He told BBC Radio Scotland’s ‘Morning Extra’ that Boyle’s performance in Saturday’s final, after weeks of intense media scrutiny, was a ‘triumph’.
‘I’m just wondering, could anybody really stand up to that sort of pressure, particularly when you’re not used to it, and not have a few difficulties with it?’ he said. ‘Does that mean we shouldn’t have shows like that? No, I think that show, Britain’s Got Talent, gives people an opportunity and a chance and I doubt you would find a contestant who said, “No, I didn’t want to have a go and take my chance.” Should they take care of their contestants a bit better? Yes, they probably should.’
Susan’s brother Gerry’s views that weekend were different. ‘They just left her on her own. She has got a short fuse and she just blew. Who wouldn’t under that pressure? She’s told me, “I feel tired and stressed,” and that’s understandable. The people at Britain’s Got Talent have been guilty of not dealing properly with a situation that’s quite unique. You have to remember she’s had to deal with television and the press, which she’s never done before, on her own. They should have done a better job. They sent her into the lions’ den totally unprepared. They shoved her out there and made her accessible and then sat back and watched while they got free publicity.’
He added, after she was taken to The Priory, ‘She started feeling extremely anxious on Sunday afternoon. Later that day she had what you and I would call a panic attack. She has been away from home all week and was very lonely and in all honesty very homesick. Susan panicked because the show had come to an end and she did not know what the future held for her. There are no contracts on the table and she hadn’t spoken to Cowell properly.’
Gerry did subsequently remark, after Susan had time to settle in at The Priory, ‘She sounded a bit happier, she sounded a bit more like herself, but certainly a bit more rested and she seems to be coming home.
‘I think her friends in America would call this an anxiety attack. She’s been on a tremendous rollercoaster. There’s been an enormous amount of media speculation and intense activity.
‘She’s not used to that. She’s coming to terms with that now that she’s no longer an anonymous face. I think what led up to it was the build-up to the show and just psyching herself up for that and then wondering after the show “where do I go now?”.’
Brother John commented, ‘The past six weeks have been a dream for her but also very tiring. I fully expect her to be back home in a couple of days and playing with her cat.
‘She is a very highly strung lady and she feels like she’s let people down. But it is a nonsense. She needs a good rest and reassurance that her future is guaranteed. Six weeks ago it was a dream and it still is a dream and it’s come true.
‘She feels like she has let Blackburn down. She definitely hasn’t, but that is obviously what she thinks. She is worried about how people will feel about her. She doesn’t realise how much people love her.
‘This is the best place for her. She is exhausted, but she is doing fine and needs her family and friends around her.’
But it wasn’t just those who were close to BGT or Susan who had views on her condition and the effect her fame had had on her.
Messages of support flooded in from ‘ordinary’ people around the world, worried about her health and her state of mind, as well as from those in the public eye. In addition, there were many better-informed on the pressures she had been under, who too were concerned.
Mark Borkowski, the publicist and author of The Fame Formula: How Hollywood’s Fixers, Fakers and Star Makers Created the Celebrity Industry, said, ‘This is the modern equivalent of a freak show. I’m one of the few people who didn’t feel that she had much of a future. You can’t pluck somebody with those issues and fix them overnight… We are beginning to see more and more peo
ple who are casualties of the process.’
He added, ‘When you need to buy time, you shove someone in The Priory. They want this woman to be fit and are hoping she will come through the other side. If they get this right, she could make millions. But at what personal cost?’
Amy Clarke of Mencap – the highly-respected charity for those with learning difficulties and their families – said, ‘Sometimes people with a learning disability, like me, find it harder to communicate and get used to new things. Susan Boyle’s life has changed overnight and she, like anyone else, should have the right support to deal with this kind of pressure. Someone with a learning disability might need support dealing with new situations and communicating their feelings in an appropriate way.’
But she also said, ‘I like the fact that someone with a learning disability has done well on a talent show. Susan Boyle is an inspiration to me because you rarely see people with a learning disability on television and making a success in showbiz.’
Andrew McCulloch, chief executive of the Mental Health Foundation, said, ‘As a result of taking part in Britain’s Got Talent, Susan Boyle has received an unprecedented amount of attention. Considering that she has also had to cope with the pressure of taking part in a national television competition it is understandable that Susan is feeling exhausted. The experience can be overwhelming, especially for somebody who is not used to living in the spotlight. Reality television programmes and the media can very quickly propel people who lead very ordinary lives into a world that is unfamiliar and fast-paced. It is only right that Susan is being supported at this time and is getting the care she needs.’
The debate came as a survey of more than 3,000 Britons found that seven out of ten people believed Susan should not have been allowed to perform, while six out of ten said ITV exploited her to bolster viewing numbers.
Media regulator Ofcom received a ‘large number of complaints’ about the situation. Section eight of the broadcasting code states: ‘People in a state of distress should not be put under pressure to take part in a programme or provide interviews, unless it is warranted.’ But the Britain’s Got Talent production company said no pressure had been put on Susan to perform in the final; it had been entirely her decision.
The row continued and Culture Secretary Andy Burnham questioned whether TalkbackThames and ITV had exercised their ‘duty of care’ towards Susan. Mr Burnham said there should be a ‘process of discussion’ with ITV in order to establish what happened but emphasised broadcasters must take care of people such as Susan. ‘We are living in a world where it is not just about what happens on telly on a Saturday night. There is 360-degree scrutiny, 365 days a year. We need to look after people, not just around the camera. Broadcasters should always put people’s welfare first.’
Three days after being taken to The Priory, brother Gerry was able to announce that Susan was ‘coming back to her old ways’, although she was still said to be worried that her career might be over before it had started. ‘Where does her career go from here? Will she be still accepted? She didn’t win the competition. Will people still want to hear her sing? And will there be a career for her as we stand here today? What Susan needs most now is to return from London to Edinburgh, to come home to Blackburn, be at home for a couple of days.’
After five days at The Priory, five days in which the world in general, and Britain and America in particular, waited with baited breath for news of her welfare, it was revealed that Susan had at last left the hospital although not even her family seemed to know exactly where she’d gone.
‘I think things are becoming clearer now and she’s much more content. I believe she’s in the middle of London, in a flat in London,’ Gerry told GMTV.
‘The way forward now is to talk about where her career goes from here. She’s absorbing the fact that America has a huge appetite for her and she’s now beginning to believe that yes, indeed, I will be a singer and there will be a recording career beyond it. It’s all she ever wanted to do.
‘Simon Cowell – he’s been around the dance floor a few times hasn’t he? I’m sure he knows that he’s got someone who has broken down the barriers in America before she even gets there and I’m sure Simon will do a good job for her.’
Whatever kind of treatment it was deemed Susan needed, one of the first sightings of her came when she indulged in some good old-fashioned retail therapy. It wasn’t in the boutiques of South Molton Street, W1, or the department stores of Knightsbridge, however, that she decided to splash out. Rather it was in the quiet, suburban town of Radlett in Hertfordshire, an affluent area popular for its mix of countryside and ease of access to London.
Susan was joined on her shopping trip by Dr Sarah Lotzof, a private doctor with an interest in psychiatry. When asked how she was feeling, Susan replied, ‘Oh fine, thanks.’ And when complimented on her appearance, she just smiled coyly and thanked well-wishers. The pair went to the Lulu & Fred clothes store in Radlett. Staff closed the shop so Susan could browse in privacy, and she bought a range of expensive clothes from designers such as Handwritten, Elie Tahari and Twin-Set. Her spree included stocking up on casual wear, smart trousers, matching tops, cardigans, shoes and a dress. Frederic Benisty, co-owner of the shop, said, ‘She was here having a good time. She came out with her doctor and you can imagine that when someone like that goes out they are going to be a little bit anxious. But halfway through she was absolutely thrilled and happy. She was absolutely fine. She was joking around and having a laugh.’
By the Saturday, seven days after the exhausting final, Susan was looking happy and healthy when she flew into Edinburgh Airport from London. She smiled and posed before a ‘welcome home’ sign before being whisked off for a planned family reunion at a secret location.
Brother John said, ‘I have spoken to Susan and she is very excited and positive about the future. She told me, “Don’t worry. I’m having the time of my life.” She said she felt fantastic and couldn’t wait to come back home this weekend. She was giggling away and sounded more relaxed than she has in ages.
‘That’s the thing with Susan. She suffers from these mood swings, so I hope that now she’s out of the clinic she’s OK.
‘I also hope she’s been reassured by Simon Cowell’s people that everything’s on track with her career and that she can now start looking forward.’
He said his sister had been pleased when Cowell rang her at The Priory to reassure her that her career was on track. ‘By all accounts it gave her a real boost and I hope that I can thank him soon for all the help he’s given her,’ he said. But he added, ‘She was put under extreme pressure and I don’t think they handled the situation well. These were exceptional circumstances and they had a duty of care towards her.
‘I’m very angry about it. They could have done more to help Susan. She can be very influenced by other people. She never listens to her family. It’s part of her slight disability. She’s very naive,’ he said.
Brother Gerry also highlighted some of her difficulties. ‘She thinks the best of everyone – that’s her upbringing, she takes everyone at face value. A part of her thinks she can walk down the street and nothing is different to before. But it’s not like that any more – she’s a worldwide phenomenon. We just hope she doesn’t get taken for a ride by unscrupulous people.’
Gerry said first thing she planned do with her earnings was to buy her £80,000 four-bedroom council home in Blackburn. It had been rented by her family for 50 years and SuBo still slept in the same room she had as a child. ‘She will keep the house as part of the family and if she can afford a bigger house she will buy that too. She’s certainly not going to buy a Jaguar or do this and that and fritter the money away – she can’t even drive! That’s her all over – she’s so generous. Money is not really important to her. What she wants is a successful singing career and to be respected.’
If one aspect of the torment she had been through was her separation from Pebbles that at least was to end. The much-loved pet was sh
ielded from photographers – one newspaper decided ‘Pebbles Has a Minder’ – while being carried from Susan’s home to be reunited with her at a secret address.
By the middle of the week, ten days after the collapse at the hotel, Susan was winging her way back down to London for rehearsals for the Britain’s Got Talent tour. The question was, would she be fit enough to appear?
One insider said, ‘Everything depends on Susan and how she feels. We have made it clear that we are in her hands and we just want to make sure that she is fit and well.
‘At the moment it looks like Susan will join the rest of the BGT finalists on stage on some of the dates, but she won’t do the entire tour. The details are still being worked out. Susan is most excited about starting work on her album and we have a responsibility to make sure she is cared for and is happy and well.’
Susan was in good spirits after she jetted into London, waving and dancing for photographers. She wore the same cardigan, trousers and necklace that she had worn while shopping in Radlett the previous Friday and to travel home to Scotland the next day. Despite buying those new clothes, this made it three appearances in the same combination in less than a week. Perhaps the fact that Pebbles had also been brought to London to accompany played a part in her apparent good humour. She also knew that she could contact Dr Lotzof any time if a problem developed.
Simon Cowell reportedly paid for her accommodation on her return – a luxury flat valued at £2 million in a converted convent in North London, which also had the essential requirement that the letting agents would allow a cat to be kept there.
It was also widely reported that U2’s financial wizard Ossie Kilkenny, 62, had agreed to mastermind Susan’s career.
The other acts would be staying in hotels, but the plan was that Susan would be returned to her new home whenever possible. No less than four limos were to be used to fool photographers so that her comings and goings could be kept as secret as possible.
Susan was due to rehearse on the Tuesday for the opening night of the month-long 26-show tour in Birmingham that Friday, but she cancelled, causing many to wonder whether she would make it. But make it she did, and in style.