by M. J. Haag
The canvas on the back of the truck opened, and light poured in. It hadn’t taken us nearly as long to return to Whiteman because of the roads the fey had cleared on the way to the bunker.
I blinked, my eyes adjusting to see the fey leader. While the rest of the passengers were too caught up in their own troubles to notice mine, Molev’s steady gaze hadn’t missed a thing.
“Go,” he said to someone off to the side of the truck before addressing me.
“We are here. We must take him inside, Eden,” he said.
I nodded. He and Kerr climbed into the truck. With Molev at Ghua’s head and Kerr at his feet, they carefully turned Ghua to his side. I wanted them to hurry and get him to wherever he needed to go for help. They moved slowly though, picking him up and easing him from the truck.
Ghua groaned once they were out, the first sound he’d made since the hound attack.
“All is well,” Molev assured, looking up at me. “Feeling pain means he will live.”
I jumped out of the back to follow them through the survivors congregated around the truck. The truck’s door banged closed, and I looked back to see Will hurrying our way. He didn’t say anything as he walked beside me.
Molev and Kerr moved steadily toward the white building and had almost made it to the door when it opened. Matt Davis strode out. He took in Ghua’s condition and the survivors behind us in a single glance then moved to hold the door open.
“What happened?”
“We freed the humans who were being held,” Molev said. “One of the humans didn’t like our interference and let two hellhounds in the bunker.”
“It’s true,” Will said, as if Matt wouldn’t have believed Molev without verification. “One of the men holding the survivors prisoner opened the hatch.”
Molev and Kerr cleared the door and started across the large open space to a screened-in area toward the back.
“The hounds were drawn to the humans. Ghua was protecting Eden.”
My eyes started to water, and I had to look away.
“Where is the woman who heals you?” Molev asked.
We rounded the screen area, and I saw several beds with clean, white sheets and shelves of supplies.
“I don’t think there’s much we can do for him,” Matt said, studying Ghua’s back. “Are you sure he’s still alive?”
“He is alive,” Molev said. “Where is the woman?”
“Will, please find Mrs. Feld.”
Will nodded and ran from the area. The heavy fall of his footsteps echoed in the building until the door slammed closed.
“I am truly grateful for the help you’ve given us and for bringing the survivors here,” Matt said in the sudden silence.
“We did not bring all of them. The men who took the children were left behind,” Molev said.
“Will said they wouldn’t be welcome here,” I clarified so Matt wouldn’t think it was Molev’s decision to leave anyone behind. “They aren’t good people. He made a good call.”
“Yes. He and I talked before you set out. I trusted him to evaluate the situation and speak on my behalf and on behalf of every person here.”
“You know leaving them behind doesn’t fix the problem. They’ll look for more people.”
“And we’ll visit them again,” Matt promised.
I glanced at Ghua, wondering if it was worth the price. To Matt, who wasn’t risking anything, who was gaining more able-bodied people at Whiteman, it was undoubtedly worth the price. But what about for the fey?
“One of the fey died there.” I looked at Matt. “They carried him from the bunker until the first lake.”
“We returned him to the water, but he will live on in our minds,” Kerr said.
“By leaving those men behind, you’ve created a need to go back and risk losing another fey or two because we both know you can’t check on them without the fey’s help.”
“I thought you said it was a good call to leave them behind.”
“No. I said it was a good call not to bring them here. It would have been a better call to just kill them on the spot.”
“We can’t start acting as executioners,” Matt said.
“Why not? They did. They killed Nancy’s husband in the street when he tried to stop them from taking his kids.”
“We have laws. Trials to prove innocence or guilt.”
“In the old world. In the new world, hesitating or making the wrong choices will get innocent people killed.”
The door opened, and two sets of hurried footsteps came our way.
Will rounded the corner with a woman. She didn’t look old enough to be a doctor. I guessed she was in her early twenties, maybe. Not a single white strand interrupted the fall of her dark hair. Her red-rimmed eyes swept over us before landing on Ghua. I didn’t miss the way her steps slowed for a moment before she regained her purposeful walk.
“Will said you needed me?” She kept her gaze fixed on Matt as she spoke.
“Yes. We need you to clean the fey’s wounds. Please.”
“His name is Ghua,” I said. Her gaze flicked to me before returning to Matt.
“After the last breach, we have very few supplies left. We’ve already emptied the base’s clinic. I’m not sure we have enough supplies to clean and suture the wounds.”
“How do you know? You’ve barely looked at him,” I said.
The door opened again, but I didn’t pay attention to who was joining our little party.
“He’s covered with lacerations from the back of his head to his thighs. I don’t need to count them to know it’s a lot.”
Matt looked at Molev. “How quickly will he heal on his own?”
“Are you serious?” I said. “Get your damn supplies out and fix him. I don’t care if you run out. The fey can find more.”
Molev grunted in agreement.
“They aren’t easy to come by,” Matt said. “Clinics and hospitals are usually within cities. If they haven’t been bombed, they’re overrun with infected.”
Two people rounded the screen. It took a moment to recognize Mya with her windblown hair. Drav nodded to Molev then went to Ghua. He bent and started speaking so softly in his ear that I couldn’t hear what he was saying. I doubted it mattered as much as what Mya had to say, though.
“This is exactly what I’m talking about,” she said, her hands on her hips. “If it were a human on that table, you wouldn’t even hesitate to use the supplies if it meant saving a life. If you really want to save human lives, you do everything you can to keep the fey alive. Because if they die, we die. When are you going to get that through your heads?
“How many of you would have starved already if not for the supply runs they do? How many more would be dead if the fey weren’t here to help fight off the infected? Think long and hard about where you would be without them before you decide their lives have less value than anyone else’s.”
Matt looked at the nurse.
“Use what we have.” He focused on Mya. “You’re wrong. I wouldn’t have wanted to use the sutures on a human hurt this badly, either. It would have been a waste because the weak tend to die here. But as you’ve pointed out, the fey are not weak.”
Mya crossed her arms, looking stubbornly unforgiving.
Mrs. Feld moved to the shelves and started grabbing supplies.
I watched as she began cleaning the wounds to prepare for all the stitches she’d need to place. She didn’t talk much as she worked. Matt and Molev quietly left the area, with Mya and Drav not far behind. Kerr stayed with me and watched Mrs. Feld work. I paced and chewed at the skin around my fingers, something I hadn’t done since freshman year in high school.
“How long will he need the stitches in?” I asked when she opened the last pack.
“I’m honestly not sure. I think maybe seven days.”
“Do they heal faster?”
“I don’t know.” She glanced at Kerr then quickly away. “I’m not a doctor, and none of the fey have needed my help before.�
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“We do heal faster,” Kerr said. “Not as fast as when we’re in the caves, but faster than humans seem to.”
The woman ducked her head and made a sniffling sound. When she moved to wipe her face with the back of her hand, Kerr stopped her.
“He was bitten by a hound. It would be safer if you did not put his blood on your face.”
She nodded and tied off the last stitch. I moved closer to Ghua as she started to clean up all the suture wrappers. She tossed everything, along with the gloves, into the trash then went to wash her hands in the nearby sink. When I caught her reflection in the mirror, I saw her tears.
A lot of people cried nowadays. Fear, frustration, and grief were a normal part of life now. But, not for me. Not anymore. I carefully held Ghua’s hand.
Mrs. Feld came back over.
“That’s all I can do,” she said. “I don’t know if I’ve actually helped him or not, but I did my best.”
She’d stitched the deepest gashes first, then used what materials she had left to work on the wounds Ghua would be more likely to reopen if no stitches were in place. Between the stitches, butterfly bandages, and wrapped gauze, Ghua looked a bit like a mummy now. But a breathing mummy.
“What’s your name?” I asked, noting her eyes were dry once more.
“Cassie.”
“Thank you for helping him, Cassie.”
She nodded and walked away. Kerr watched her leave. I watched Ghua breathe. His chest expanded and contracted in a steady rhythm. That had to be a good sign. At least, that’s what I kept telling myself.
Not even a full 24 hours had passed since the attack. Yet, it felt like I’d been waiting for Ghua to wake up for days. I pulled a chair close to the bed and sat there, holding his hand.
* * * *
“Eden.”
Ghua’s voice penetrated my dream, and it took a few moments to realize I’d fallen asleep in the chair. Yawning, I sat up straight and opened my eyes. The light had faded in the building, and Kerr was nowhere around.
I looked at Ghua and found him watching me.
“Ghua! I thought I’d dreamt you saying my name. Are you okay? Do you need something to drink?”
“A drink would be good.”
I went to the sink and grabbed one of the paper cups from the nearby shelf. When I got it back to him, I hesitated.
“Maybe I can find a straw.”
“No. I can drink.”
He accepted the cup and lifted himself up enough to gulp down the water before settling on his stomach again.
I took the empty cup from his hand and started playing with it as we studied one another.
“I thought you wouldn’t wake up,” I said softly.
He reached out for my hand. The warmth of his skin against mine brought tears to my eyes. I’d thought he would never touch me like this again.
“I was terrified you would die.”
“I will never leave you.”
I gave his hand a squeeze. He might believe his words, but I wasn’t so sure.
“How do you feel? Your back looks like it belongs to Frankenstein.”
“I look like more of a monster, now?”
“No. You don’t look like a monster at all. Just really, really hurt.”
He grunted.
“You’re not going to tell me how much it hurts, are you?”
He grinned slightly.
“It hurts less when you’re touching me.”
I pulled my chair close and lightly traced my fingers over his face. He closed his eyes with a sigh. Soon his breathing evened out again.
“We’ll leave at first light,” a familiar voice said behind me.
I glanced toward the screened opening and saw Molev.
“Good. I think he’ll be more comfortable at home.”
Molev nodded and left. I didn’t fall asleep, again. Instead, I kept touching Ghua’s face, hoping it would be enough to bring him some comfort even in his sleep.
When the room began to brighten, I left his side to find a bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror, not really seeing the dark circles under my eyes or my head of tangled, dark hair. What I saw was the fear in my eyes. This time it wasn’t the infected or hellhounds that had put it there.
Everything that I’d faced, all the terror and the moments I’d thought would be my last, had nothing on what I’d felt until the moment Ghua had opened his eyes again. Yet, I still worried about what would come next. It wasn’t really a choice anymore. I couldn’t imagine staying behind at Whiteman. Yet, I knew what going with Ghua would mean. He already had my trust and my heart. Once I told him that, I knew what was next.
Dongzilla.
I shivered and ran the water to wash my face. While I cleaned up, I kept reminding myself I’d have time. He was hurt pretty badly.
When I returned to Ghua, I found him awake and standing and talking to Kerr.
“Are you sure you should be up?” I asked, hurrying toward him.
He wrapped his good arm around me and pulled me close. I leaned against his chest, careful not to touch anything bandaged. He smelled faintly of soap and antiseptic as I pressed my face to his skin.
“I am fine, Eden,” he said, smoothing a hand over my hair and down my back. “It is easier for me to walk to the truck than to be carried.”
“The sun is coming up,” Kerr said. “We can leave as soon as Ghua limps his way outside.”
I peered up at him, worried that just walking would rip something open. Ghua looked down at me, planted a kiss on my forehead, and grinned at Kerr.
“Go. My pain will be less with your absence.”
Kerr laughed and walked away.
“Do you need help?” I asked.
He shook his head.
“But, you can walk in front of me to give me something to focus on.”
I grinned, unable to help myself. The guy was probably in a shit ton of pain, and he wanted to stare at my ass.
“Fine. I’ll walk slowly, though.”
He gave me another kiss then swatted my butt lightly as I turned away.
I laughed and exaggerated my walk.
It took five minutes to get to the truck and another three for Ghua to crawl into the back on his hands and knees then lay on the blanket that had been placed there for him. Nancy and the kids rode in the back with us while an escort of fey ran beside us.
“I thought you’d stay at Whiteman,” I said once we cleared the gates.
Nancy shook her head.
“I’m not stupid enough to let pride or discrimination influence my decisions. Fear is a different story. I’ve seen the way these guys fight. They killed two hounds. I want my kids to live where they will be the safest, and Molev said there’d be room for us at Tolerance.”
“There is. But you know what they want, right?”
Nancy looked at her daughter. Brenna smiled and set her head against her mother’s shoulder. Her gaze, similar in color to her mother’s, met mine.
“I know what they’ll want,” Brenna said. “And I know, this time, I’ll have a choice.”
The way she said it made my stomach sink.
“I’m sorry we couldn’t get there sooner.”
“I’m alive and safe. Not many people can say that.”
“You will be safe with us,” Ghua said from his prone position on the floor. “And, if you do not want to have sex, just say you are twelve. That is what Eden does.”
He said it all with complete seriousness, and I grinned at Brenna.
“They have a thing about kids. Until you’re eighteen, you’re off limits.”
“No, Eden. Until you’re ready, you’re off limits.”
I stared at the man, losing even more of my heart to him.
Twenty
The first day back was rough on Ghua. He spent most of his time lying on his stomach in bed. He didn’t complain, but when he thought I wasn’t looking, he’d move around, showing his discomfort.
The second day, he walked around the
house. Standing up straight didn’t seem to bother him at all. However, going up and down the stairs produced a few winces. Throughout the day, I kept him company wherever he went. If he wanted to lay on the bed, I laid beside him. And, we spent a lot of time talking. I asked him questions about his first few days on the surface. I couldn’t imagine discovering a whole new world. He told me about the confusion he and the other men felt when seeing humans and then the curiosity once Drav discovered the first female, Mya. Most of it was fairly amusing because of his naivety. Some of it was sad like when they discovered what death meant here.
I snuggled close to Ghua’s side and ran my fingers through his hair.
“I don’t like this,” he said.
I immediately stopped. “Sorry.”
“Not your touch. I will always like that. I do not like waiting to heal. It takes too long.”
I grinned and went back to petting his hair.
“Cassie said that if you were human, you would need to wait almost two weeks before getting some of these stitches out. Since you’re different, she’s not sure how long it will take. Molev said you heal quickly. So, be thankful it’s not two weeks of this.”
“I would not survive two weeks being unable to hold you.”
I leaned forward and kissed his cheek.
“You’re very strong. I think you would survive.”
Smiling slightly, I closed my eyes and pretended not to hear his grumbling. I fell asleep to the weight of his good arm over my back.
When I woke first, I slipped from bed to use the bathroom and shower. The hot spray felt so good, I lingered. After returning, I’d been so preoccupied with Ghua that I hadn’t really paid attention to much else. It would take time to get used to the idea that I had easy and safe access to regular bathing and clean clothes. Well, clean clothes if I was willing to walk around in one of his oversized shirts while mine washed.
I turned off the water and dried. The idea of clean clothes had me ignoring the pile of dirty ones on the floor and wrapping the towel around my torso.
Ghua still breathed softly when I opened the door. Instead of going to the dresser, which made noise when opening the drawers, I went to the other door in the room. The door I hadn’t opened on my first night in the house. It had to lead to a walk-in closet. I held a tiny spark of hope that I’d find it stuffed with women’s clothes, all my size. I was a dreamer like that. If I couldn’t have that wish, I would settle for some board games.