Before she could open her mouth, he spoke. “Tell me the film is complete and we can leave this place immediately.”
She grimaced. “I didn’t find enough. Possibly, they were using the crane camera for some of the scene. If so, the usable part is likely to have been confiscated and never separated out from the last seconds.”
David cursed. “We have to track down the film that recorded Jen’s death?”
“I’m afraid so.” She crawled onto the mattress and gave him an awkward hug. “You never have to look at any of it.”
Before she could say another word, David began to speak, in a low tone, as if he was somewhere else, not here with her.
“That morning, Jen was angry at Lucas for changing the script yet again. She had trouble memorizing and he kept changing her dialogue. She complained to everybody, including Lucas. He somehow calmed her down. We went through costume and makeup as usual, and went to our places, to the spot where they’d erected the crane.”
He paused.
“We shot the argument first. The wind was rising the whole time, but the sound engineer said he got our dialogue.” He paused again. A few seconds later, with visible effort, he said, “I guess I do remember after all. I wish I didn’t.”
She put out a hand, but didn’t touch him. He was focused on the past.
“We filmed the argument scene. Several times. From multiple angles.”
She nodded encouragingly, but he was staring at the ceiling, not looking at her.
“There was a long shot of me leaving, and Jen’s character does nothing, just watches me, stony-faced. She doesn’t give a damn.”
“Then…” he wiped his brow with shaking fingers. “So the basic shot is level when she’s dismissing me and I’m leaving. That’s from a regular camera or two. Everybody clears away, and then the—the crane rises up to show me riding away from her, showing her as a tiny figure alone in this enormous desert with me getting farther away by the second.”
He fell silent. His face shut down, as if he was trying to hide strong emotion.
After a minute, Sara asked, “What went wrong? The crane wouldn’t have been anywhere near her, surely?”
David’s expression became haunted. “The crane was set up on uneven ground, above her.”
He dragged both his hands down his face. “This should be easier to say after five years.” He continued in a subdued voice. “A huge wind came up suddenly. It blew the crane over. Jen was crushed.”
She put her arms around him. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
The words poured out of him as if a dam had broken. “One minute she was alive. The next, she was dead. They said later that she died instantly. I didn’t even know at first. I heard shouting. I thought the take had been stopped. I turned my horse around, and everybody was running toward her. I got there last because I was so far away. I had to ride closer, dismount, and toss the reins to someone. While I did that, the men lifted the crane off her, and there was, like, a groan that rose from the people around her. I knew at that moment. I knew she was gone. But I kept on running toward her. By the time I got to her, someone had already put a blanket over her. When I saw the blanket was covering her face, I knew.”
She hugged him harder.
His voice was hoarse with emotion. “I freaked out. I tried to take the blanket off, to see her. Three guys had to restrain me. I was crazy.” His expression contorted with remembered pain.
“When I finally looked for Steel, I saw him still sitting in his director’s chair, staring at nothing. I went over to him and started yelling at him, blaming him. I pulled him up from the chair and punched him. I don’t know what I yelled. Get a doctor, most likely.” He laughed without humor. “He finally looked at me. Spoke. ‘She’s gone,’ he said.”
David fell silent for a minute. Sara said nothing. His body trembled in her arms.
“Someone called the sheriff’s office. Logan came out. He was a deputy back then.” He rubbed his face with one hand. “It took a long time for him to show up. I can’t—I can’t talk about that hour. Waiting. Finally, Logan arrived. Then we waited some more. All the while, Jen was lying under that blanket. Finally, Logan got enough photos and measurements, and an ambulance arrived to take her away.”
After a minute, he heaved a heavy sigh. “That was the worst day of my life.”
“I’m so sorry.” She hugged him tighter.
“It shouldn’t have happened. An engineer directed the placement, but none of the crew were locals. They didn’t know about freak winds.”
Sara’s words slipped out involuntarily. “Yet you blame Lucas for Jennifer’s death?”
He grimaced. “The truth is, none of it was Lucas's fault. It was just a terrible accident, the hand of fate in action. I went crazy with grief. I needed someone to blame. Blaming Lucas was easy.” He pulled out of her embrace and slid over onto his stomach, clutching the bedspread. “Until that moment, I was young and powerful, stronger than Lucas because he was an old guy. I totally had the arrogance of youth.
“Yet when it happened, everybody ignored me. They clustered around him. He was the ex-husband, and the boss. Everyone respected him. He had everything going for him, and I was merely the brokenhearted boyfriend, faintly ridiculous because I was there for sex only. They treated me like an insensate slab of meat.”
She put a soft hand on his back. “That must have hurt.”
David turned his head and looked at her. “I didn’t become an actor to be ignored. Lucas has never admitted I had any standing with Jen. He keeps saying she would have dumped me once filming was over and gone back to him. I don’t buy that. I never did. What Jen and I had was real and true and deep.”
“I’m so sorry you suffered.”
“Feels good to get it off my chest at last,” he muttered, letting his head drop back to the bedspread.
“Wait. Didn’t you ever talk about that day before?”
He propped himself up on his side, facing her. Those blue eyes, sad now, studied her face. “I never could tell anyone, not even my therapist. It felt too…intimate. Only you.”
“But…why me?”
“You try to come off as logical and businesslike, but inside, you’re like me. You know about loving obsessively.”
Her mouth dropped open. He was right.
He put out a large hand and gently touched her lips. “It’s okay. We can obsess about each other from now on.”
“Oh, David,” she said, stroking his golden hair. “Oh, my darling.” Her eyes filled with tears as she leaned in and softly kissed his lips. His strong arms came around her and his mouth moved against hers.
Chapter 29
David slept. Sara lay beside him, thinking about the pain he’d endured and how it still festered in his heart all these years later. Behind the mask of the successful movie star, beyond the impressive embodiment of physical attributes the world admired, was a real man who suffered. Would finishing Desert Wind finally release David from his anguish?
How foolish she had been to listen to Lucas and doubt David’s love even for an instant. David had let her see deeply into his heart. He had opened himself to her and shown her his emotional vulnerability, the core of him. That was an action far more intimate than their sexual union. Such true sharing made their marriage real.
She must do her best to help him. He deserved to be set free. She slowly inched her way off the bed and tiptoed out of the room.
So much emotion from the past inhabited this house. David, Lucas, George, even her with her silly crush that she’d obsessed over for years. If she could finish this film, perhaps at last they’d all be set free.
Chapter 30
An hour later, David joined her in the editing booth. “Sorry for punking out on you.” His face still showed the remnants of strong emotion.
He came to stand by her chair and she wrapped her arms around his waist. “I love you. I’m so sorry you suffered all those years ago. I’m sorry you’re still suffering.”
&n
bsp; He pulled her up from the seat, returning her effort to comfort him with a heartfelt embrace. “It’s you and me now. I want to be finished with the past.”
She relaxed in his arms. After a few seconds, he visibly shook off his emotion. He pointed at the monitors. “How’s it going?”
“Better, but we’re still missing some pieces.” She recited where the breaks were. “As far as we know, Lucas has given us every file he has. But I haven’t found the final scene.”
“Nothing?”
She shook her head.
David paced the small room. “Forget asking Steel or Ross. They’re both out of it. I saw them nodding off in the den in front of the TV.”
“I asked George to keep Lucas away from this.” She gestured with a hand toward the desktop computer.
“George could be sharing his drugs. Or sharing his doctor.”
“Given how Lucas was behaving a few days ago, maybe George has the right idea.”
She told him what Lucas had said about the police confiscating the film from the crane camera.
David rubbed his face. His expression was not happy. “Guess I have to call Logan and see if he knows what happened to what we shot the last day.”
He pulled out his phone. A few minutes later, he clicked off. “Don’t know if you caught all that. Logan says he has some disks and papers, but I’ll have to go to his office in town to get them.” David looked upset and not eager to visit the sheriff.
“I’ll go with you,” she said. “You don’t have to do it alone.”
His expression brightened a little. “True.”
They drove into the tiny town where the sheriff had his office on the back side of the small post office-grocery.
Logan had spoken with the local accent the night of the fire, but once they got talking to him, his California way of speech came right back. “I’ve waited five years for someone to show up and claim these,” he said. “Tell me why you two have a right to them.”
David pulled out his contract with George. “I have the option to all the film footage previously shot, and the right to shoot new footage.”
Logan read the contract quickly, then nodded. “Good enough. I’ll take a copy of this for my records.” While he was at the printer in the same room, Logan said, “This is an economically depressed area. Will you be shooting new scenes?”
David said, “Depends on what you’ve got.”
“Meaning if I wanted my town to benefit, I should have destroyed the files?”
Sara suspected Sheriff Logan was having them on, but she responded, anyway. “There might be some additional filming. We won’t know until we look at the files.”
“What’s going on with Lucas? Has he torched anything else?”
“He’s been acting even weirder now that George is here. All happy.”
“Sharing drugs, most likely,” Logan said with a frown. “I moved out here to get away from that lifestyle.”
“May we have the film?” Sara asked.
Logan set down his copy of the contract. He opened his top desk drawer and drew out a key, then went to a file cabinet and unlocked the top drawer. After pulling out a manila envelope, he carefully emptied its contents onto his desk. A couple of CDs wrapped in cardboard were clipped to what must be nearly a hundred pages of typing paper.
“May I?” she asked.
“Be my guest.” He gestured at the small pile.
The papers were the transcript of a deposition.
“I think this is it,” she said in a low voice. She looked at David. He looked stricken.
Sheriff Logan had David sign a receipt, but David pointedly didn’t touch the package. Sara put it into a canvas tote bag, out of sight. They thanked the sheriff and walked quietly to David’s vehicle.
“I can’t talk about it now, Sara,” David said. “I hope you understand.”
She wanted to touch him, but he seemed very far away, wrapped in the old grief she would never fully understand. Film magic she grasped. Obsessive love she thought she comprehended now, except she’d never really loved Lucas. Her obsession had been a mere fantasy. David’s feelings for his lost lover ran deeper.
David leaned on the steering wheel but didn’t start the engine. He was lost in thought, or memories.
“Why don’t I drive?” she asked.
Without a word, he exited via the driver’s door. She hopped out and they traded places, still not exchanging a word. Although she looked at him, he didn’t seem to be looking at her at all. Soberly, Sara drove them back to Lucas Steel’s estate. Where would this end?
Chapter 31
Sara kept the door to the editing booth locked while she looked at the digital dailies that might contain footage of Jennifer Barnes's tragic death. She didn’t want Lucas or David to stumble in and see something unforgettable.
How bizarre that she, Sara Finer, was the one picking up the pieces after the woman who still haunted two men who had loved her. The comparison to Rebecca seemed stronger than ever, but she was determined to give this tale a happy ending.
Several hours later, Sara carefully copied the files onto a flash drive. She’d already made several other copies, but she had to be sure. She very carefully labeled the footage not to be used. Then she put those files in a folder so no one would accidentally stumble on them.
When she opened the door of the editing booth, David was sitting cross-legged on the floor, waiting for her.
Chapter 32
He looked up, hope and fear open in his eyes.
She nodded. “We’ve have everything we need to complete the film.”
“Did you see—?”
She shook her head and knelt down next to him, embracing him. “Let’s not talk about it.” She kissed his soft lips, pressing gently against him. “I love you. Your wish will come true for Jennifer Barnes's memorial. I promise you, I will edit this into the best film ever.”
Something like a sob broke free in his throat, and he hugged her tightly. “Thank you. Thank you.”
***
The mood between them shifted a few hours later as they lounged in their bedroom and discussed strategy.
Sara said, “I’ll start immediately on a rough cut we can review now, but the actual edit could take a year. You know how it goes. I’ll be working on minute pieces of scenes to make them just right. That takes time.”
“I’m committed to various films in the coming year, some of them on location.” David frowned. “We can’t live apart for months at a time. You have to come with me and edit on location.”
“I’ve heard of a lot of crazy big star demands, but expecting an editing suite for your wife is a bit much.” She smiled.
He laughed. “I’m a big star these days. I can get it all, just to be kept happy. Would you be willing?”
She inclined her head. “Maybe.”
He inched downward until his face was between her breasts. “Perhaps I can do something, perform some little service, to convince you,” he said, with a gleam in his eye and a tease in his voice.
“Possibly—oh.” Her poise fled when his lips caressed a tender place. “Not fair. You’re using sex to influence me.” She wriggled away from him, causing his breath to come harder.
“You’ve been doing the same to me since the moment I first met you.”
Chapter 33
Sara worked all night and all the next day to put together a rough cut. Very rough. She hardly saw David during that time. At one point she returned to the editing booth from a break and found Lucas looking at the last day footage.
She’d left the door locked, but of course he had a key to every room in his own house.
On the screen, Jennifer Barnes moved around a ranch exterior.
“She was a natural,” he said.
Surprising to see him facing up to the past. He’d been in full flight previously. She asked, “Have you ever watched the footage?”
He poured himself another drink. “Never. I never have until tonight. Couldn’t bear it.”
“What has changed?”
He looked at her. “You know damn well you and that annoying whelp Connor have been pushing at me, pressuring me to open the door to the past.”
She put up her palms defensively. “Not my idea. Blame George. He sent me here.”
“He also sent Connor,” he said sourly.
“George has a lot to answer for,” she said with a smile.
“You’ve set on me like a junkyard dog, too. You bit in and won’t let go.”
“But isn’t it good that you are finally looking at the footage? Doesn’t that suggest you’re turning a corner on grief at last?”
He sipped his drink. “I don’t know. She looks so vibrant. She was dead within days of this scene being shot.”
She took a deep breath. “Forgive me in advance for saying this. Her death was a tragic accident, not some personal swipe at you requiring the sacrifice of your career and your happiness for the rest of your life. I’ve learned recently that holding onto old emotions obsessively isn’t very smart.”
Lucas acted as if he hadn’t heard her. “You don’t think I’m to blame? That I overruled some essential safety precaution and caused her to die?”
“Did you?” She studied his face, trying to judge his honesty.
“No. I wish the crane’s fall had been directly my fault. Then I could link my malaise of the past five years to something I did or didn’t do that I should have.”
He studied the bottle with unseeing eyes. “Where did you and I go wrong, Sara? When you arrived here, I knew you still loved me. Now it’s all gone.”
She nodded at the whiskey bottle from which he kept sampling. “People change. I used to idolize you, but I’ve grown up. When I was your intern, you were a hero to me.”
At his wince, she shut up.
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