Flying Free
Rough Love 8
Leighton Greene
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
© 2019 Leighton Greene. All rights reserved. This book or parts thereof may not be reproduced in any form, stored in any retrieval system, or transmitted in any form by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or otherwise—without prior written permission of the author.
All characters in this book are eighteen or older.
Edited by Mary Novak at www.msnovakedits.com
Contents
Prologue: Before
I. Rumors
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
II. Xander's Dragons
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
III. Friends and Enemies
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Winter Wonders
Dear daring and delightful reader,
Also by the Author
Prologue: Before
“We like him.”
Elijah Dover is trying out the phrase on his tongue, tasting the words. This is not a sentence he’s used to saying when it comes to Xander Romano’s boyfriends, so he’s throwing it out there to see if it sticks.
“We do.” Dean Canning sounds just as surprised.
“Frankly, I’m suspicious,” Elijah announces. “Benjamin Ballard, from everything we’ve seen, is neither annoying nor dull. He’s actually pleasant to spend time with. What, therefore, does our dear Alexander see in him?” Elijah rolls over on the couch, and fixes Dean with a frown.
“It’s a mystery,” Dean agrees.
They’ve just met Ben for the first time, and there was a lot for him to live up to, given Xander’s rapturous descriptions of the guy. Of course, Elijah and Dean have heard similar descriptions before of Xander’s boys, although never with quite the same look of wonder in Xander’s eyes.
No, Ben was special to Xander, and when they met Ben, they got it. Guy was hot, funny, talented, and really fricking decent insofar as Xander’s usual types went.
“We won’t have anything to gossip about anymore, if the X-man has suddenly stopped dating losers,” Elijah points out.
“We’ll have to find a new topic.” Dean brings them both a Coke from the kitchen and they settle to ruminate some more. “I’m not sure if I can get used to it.”
“You might have to, friend, because I think Ben is going to be sticking around for a while. And if they break up—”
“Don’t jinx it!”
Elijah raps on the table three times. Usually he does it on Dean’s head, but Dean is too far away.
“Unjinxed,” he announces.
“Mmmmm.” It’s a drawn-out, ponderous sound, as though Dean is still trying to make up his mind whether to be happy about Ben or worry about another potential Adam Situation when Xander fucks up.
Because fuck up, Xander inevitably will.
And Elijah can’t help Dean figure out whether to be more happy or more worried; he hasn’t made up his own mind yet.
They suck on their Cokes, and Elijah wonders how much probing he can get away with before his girlfriend Gina puts a stop to it. She’s back in LA right now, while he’s in New York, so it seems like prime prying time, although she’ll find out eventually. She has a sixth sense about that kind of thing, like a little angel on his shoulder begging him to be good and stay out of things that don’t concern him.
“We should ask Ben over some time,” Elijah suggests. “Get to know him better.”
Because he really does like Ben, and wants to make sure things go smoothly for him.
From time to time Elijah has concerns about Xander, about the predilections that he’s usually tried to cover up from his close friends, but not so well that Elijah doesn’t have a pretty good idea of what’s going on.
Elijah is a live-and-let-live kind of guy, aside from the nosiness, so it’s never been of much interest to him what Xander does. In fact, he’s teased Xander precisely once about it back in college when Elijah caught him sneaking into the group house one very early morning, dressed in leather and motherfucking chains, which was hardly something Elijah could pass up without comment.
Xander snarled something extremely uncalled-for back, and then wouldn’t speak to Elijah for a week, until Dean smoothed things over between them and Xander offered a sheepish apology.
And Elijah learned not to joke about Xander’s sex life.
Benjamin Ballard, on the other hand, with his big blue eyes and charming smile, doesn’t exactly seem like the type to…well, whatever it is that Xander does. (Elijah has definitely never been interested in the mechanics.)
Despite the fact that Ben has probably had a lot more sex than Elijah ever has, he seems innocent and…breakable. He’s nothing like the parade of boys they’ve had to sit through before, all too-knowing and overtly sexual until it became torture not to say something mocking to Xander. It was only ever Dean’s slight frown and shake of the head that made Elijah bite his tongue around those types.
Ben Ballard does not fit that mold at all, and Xander is really obviously head over heels, which is another concern. Xander and love don’t exactly go hand-in-hand, Elijah has noticed over the years. Xander takes everything to heart in a way Elijah’s never seen before; every break-up shatters him, despite the length of time they take—four days or four months—although the longer the relationship, the worse it gets.
Then there’s the fact that Elijah heartily approves of Ben, so he just wants to make sure things don’t go off the rails.
It’s completely altruistic nosiness, he insists to the tiny imaginary Gina on his shoulder.
In the end, it all works out perfectly, and Elijah takes it as a benediction from the Universe that poking his nose in was the right thing to do. He calls up Ben to invite him and Xander over for beer and pizza. Only Xander can’t make it, so Ben comes alone, looking back and forth nervously between Elijah and Dean until he’s got two beers in him, and settles over the course of the afternoon.
Elijah can picture Ben fitting in with their social group in a way that none of Xander’s previous boyfriends ever have, or could. For one thing, Ballard has a sense of humor. For another, he doesn’t seem annoyed that Xander has other friends.
They’re pretty much a package deal, Elijah and Dean and Xander. Gina and also Toby, Dean’s boyfriend, have always accepted that, and it’s worked out well. The three of them have been firm friends since college, and now that Elijah and Dean are looking to start up a production company, with Xander’s backing, they’re going to have business ties as well as friendship.
But Xander’s boyfriends, if that’s even what Xander considered them, and for that matter, when he even bothered to introduce them to Dean and Elijah…Xander’s boyfriends never quite gelled. Elijah even had a serious conversation with Dean once, a long time ago now, about whether he was being a big fat oblivious homophobe about Xander’s boyfriends; whether that was the real reason none of Xander’s potentials ever made the grade in Elijah’s eyes
.
Dean said he didn’t think so, but Elijah was really the only one who could answer that question about himself. It meant a lot of soul-searching for Elijah. He knows he can be a dick sometimes, but he never wants to be an asshole.
But right after Elijah resolved to meet the next Xander Boyfriend with an open mind and an open heart, Xander announced he had collared someone, whatever that meant. And this guy, when Xander made them meet up for lunch, wouldn’t even talk to Elijah and Dean unless Xander was around. After that, Elijah figured it was less homophobia and more Xander’s excruciatingly poor taste in men.
Ben Ballard, on the other hand, even helps take out the recycling, which is Elijah’s least favorite job, but one that he’s got in the habit of doing since Gina and Xander started comparing notes on Elijah’s contribution to global warming.
It’s as Ben is helping to lift the heavy lid of the recycling bin that Elijah sees him wince. Ben unconsciously puts a hand to his chest and pats it delicately afterwards, and Elijah, not quite knowing where he should look, stares up at the gray sky and babbles about the weather and maybe catching up in LA, until Ben looks comfortable again.
But Elijah can’t help wondering about that wince, and the way Ben went a little pale.
Like he was in pain.
Which, you know, if that was Ben’s thing, whatever. That’s fine. Elijah has no problem with consenting adults doing consensual adult things.
But.
What if it’s not actually okay? What if Ben…What if Xander…
Elijah is the only straight guy in their group-of-three, and so he’s always conscious that his experiences and expectations might be different to Dean’s or Xander’s. At least, he tries to be conscious of the fact. He’s been with Gina since high school, so he has a pretty limited set of experiences himself. But he’s always thought he recognized that drive for monogamy in Xander, as well, and Elijah’s always hoped that one day Xander would find The One, or at least, A One.
And maybe he has, in Ben.
Or maybe there’s something not-so-great going on there, if Ben is left in pain after a few nights with Xander.
After Ben has gone, and Dean has half-woken from his very loud nap on the sofa, Elijah decides it warrants a conversation.
“You know much about what Xander does?” he asks, shoving Dean’s feet off the sofa arm and onto the floor with a satisfying clumpy noise. It has the desired effect: Dean comes to.
He grunts, yawns, and then says, “I fucking hope so, I’m his business partner as well as his best friend.”
“I mean, you know. The kink stuff.”
“No, and I don’t want to,” Dean replies at once, reaching for his long-forgotten, now-flat beer. He swishes a mouthful around his teeth and makes a face; swallows hurriedly. “And neither should you. You know he’s private about that.”
“Man, seriously, I’m kind of worried.”
“About?”
“Ben. And Xander.”
Dean gives a loud groan. “You need to get laid more often, ’Lij. Get Gina to come out here to New York for a visit. Maybe then you’ll worry less about what other people are doing in bed.”
“I get laid plenty; Gina’s very appreciative of my skills, I’ll have you know. And that’s not the point. After all, we never did find out why Adam dumped Xander,” Elijah insists.
“I don’t care,” Dean says bluntly. “That was the best thing that could have happened. Adam was such a—”
“Yeah, yeah. But Xander…it’s like he’s cursed.” Elijah thinks it over. “Do you think he’s cursed?”
“I think he’s a hot, famous, soon-to-be-millionaire who likes kinky stuff and who will always have trouble finding someone genuine,” Dean says, for once sincere instead of joking around. “Both because he’s a hot, famous, soon-to-be-millionaire who likes kinky stuff and because he’s kind of dumb about relationships.”
Elijah nods, but he’s still thinking. How much kinky stuff is okay? And how much of it is actually his business, versus just being a nosy jerk?
Dean says: “Can’t you just be happy for him? At least Ben is a good match on the hot-famous-gonna-be-rich end.”
“You sound like a dowager arranging a marriage. And I am happy for Xander. That’s why I’m worried. I want things to work out for him. For both of them.”
But Dean won’t discuss it any further, says that gossiping is immature and they should cut it out, especially now that Xander seems settled with someone like Ben. Elijah wonders uncharitably whether Toby has finally put his foot down on the gossip, because calling something immature is totally something Toby would say, but he lets the matter drop.
For now.
I
Rumors
Chapter One
“So, what did you think?” Xander asks. They’ve literally just pulled away from the mansion where Dr Dubois and her husband Niklaus, a big, big time Hollywood executive live. It’s out in the Hollywood Hills, and Ben can see the lights of Los Angeles twinkling below as they drive down the winding road back towards their own infinitely more humble abode.
Ben gives a little shake of the head. “I…think I just stepped back to the real side of the mirror,” he says in wonder, and then gives a chuckle. “Those are some interesting people.”
“I know, right?” Xander says enthusiastically. “Wait—interesting good, or interesting bad?”
Ben has to think about that one. They were lovely, sociable, intelligent and definitely good-interesting people. But they were also freaking terrifying at times, in the way Xander is sometimes terrifying, without meaning to be.
“I liked them all,” Ben says honestly. “And I’m honored to have met them. It’s just a lot to take in.”
Everything seemed totally normal at first, or as normal as things get in LA. They arrived in the afternoon and Ben, who has lived in the city his whole life but never bothered venturing into the richer parts of town, was taken aback by the sheer size and scope of the property. He was going to make a joke to Xander about not realizing the medical profession paid so damn well when the Doctor and her husband came out the front door to greet them, and Ben recognized Niklaus immediately.
Shit.
Niklaus was Niklaus Jaeger, the CEO of a rival studio. A rival studio that happened to be working on a rival set of superhero films. Ben hoped it wouldn’t get in the way of anything. And then he hoped coming out of the kink-closet to such a powerful guy wouldn’t be career suicide.
Suddenly, the reality of what it actually meant to go out into the kink community, to meet people, to form connections, became much, much clearer. Ben began to understand Xander’s previous reluctance about the whole thing.
It meant others had some very specific knowledge about you.
But the Doctor, dressed in a tight-fitting black cashmere sweater and flowing silk pants, and Niklaus—Nik, he insisted—had been so delighted to see the two of them, that Ben just tamped down his nerves for the time being, and tried not to be too awkward. The Doctor told him to call her “Zee, like the letter,” so Ben did, although he still had a hard time not just staring in awe at her. She was small, but her charisma made her seem larger than life, not unlike the way Xander could turn on the charm when he chose.
Xander, thankfully, smoothed the way, and Ben was able to stop stammering and tripping over his words after a few minutes. And by the time the other two couples arrived later—Drew and Zack, puppy players, and Jeff and Tabitha, Gor aficionados—Ben felt less overwhelmed and more curious about his fellow kinksters.
They were all open about it, although Ben felt there was some restraint being shown. That was A-OK by Ben, for that day, at least.
At one point the Doctor urged Ben and Xander to go off and explore the gardens while Nik finished grilling, and Ben was grateful for the time alone with his boyfriend. And grateful for the chance to have a quick gossip. “Why does she talk like that?” Ben demanded, once they were out of earshot.
“Oh,” Xander grinned, knowing imme
diately that he meant Tabitha, who constantly referred to herself in third person. “That’s just their thing, the Goreans. They’re a weird bunch, but Jeff and Tabby are okay.”
Ben had to laugh at that as they made their way down some stone steps into the formal rose garden, bushes of blooming roses circling around a water fountain in the middle. The sun was beginning to get lower in the sky, and the water jets looked like streams of fire instead, reflecting the red light.
A weird bunch, Xander called them.
Whereas Ben and Xander were completely normal, of course.
And then Xander said: “In the Gorean tradition, women are either free or kajira. Tabitha is a kajira, and to signify that, she chooses to refer to herself in third person. It’s sort of a respect thing for her master.”
Ben felt an overwhelming urge to judgey-mcjudge the fuck out of them, and Xander must have seen it cross his face, because he said: “I know. Look, it wouldn’t be my choice of kink either, if I were straight.”
“Kajira means slave, doesn’t it?” Ben asked.
Xander shrugged. “It’s a made up thing, but yeah.”
Ben looked out across the rose garden, and said nothing.
“It’s what she chooses to do,” Xander said gently. “Like we choose to do the things we do.”
“Your kink is not my kink, and that’s okay?” Ben cites the phrase he’s heard thrown around more than once tonight. “Sure. But there’s kink and then there’s…”
Flying Free (Rough Love Book 8) Page 1