by Dawn Brower
EXCERPT
Better as
a Memory
Begin Again Two
Dawn Brower
Previously published as Don’t Happen Twice. Re-Edited and Re-Releasing September 2018
Better as a Memory
One night of passion leaves Belle Brennan longing for her Mr. Mysterious...
An undercover operative, Cain Dempsey, leaves the woman he loves in order to protect her. A case he’s working on takes a turn for the worst leaving him no choice but to return to her for aide. Belle is the one person he can trust, even if she has every right to be angry with him.
Taking an impromptu vacation at her family’s lake house Belle is surprised to find Cain at the back door. He’s injured, surly, and every bit as gorgeous as she remembers. Lucky for him she’s a doctor and doesn’t hold a grudge.
Can they survive the threats surrounding them long enough to rekindle their growing passion or will Cain’s dangerous life destroy them forever?
PROLOGUE
Belle brushed her hand down the skirt of her black cocktail dress. The ballroom of the hotel where the fundraiser was being held was decorated in high style. She hated these events her parents insisted she attend. Her father, Wentworth Brennan, was a United States senator. She’d gotten used to attending the tedious events early on in her life. That didn’t mean she’d ever grown to like them. This one would be no different than any of the others.
“Hello, dear.” Her mother, Adria Brennan, leaned down and kissed her cheek. “I’m glad you were able to attend tonight. Has work been keeping you too busy to pay us a visit?”
She grimaced at her mother’s condescending tone. Adria didn’t approve of her occupation. Belle worked as an emergency room doctor at the local hospital in Castleberry. It kept her busy and she loved the constant adrenaline rush involved. She couldn’t imagine doing anything else. Her mother thought it was beneath her. It wasn’t being a doctor she objected to. It was not having a prestigious doctor in the family. Belle had a lowly position at the hospital without any real ambition to climb to a higher one. A different specialty would have been better, anything other than a general surgeon. It was, in her mother’s mind, uncouth. Her daughter should rise higher and do better. She came from one of the best families, and there were expectations.
“Everything is fine at work, and yes I’ve been busy.” Belle glanced around the room and spotted a gorgeous man sipping a glass of champagne. His dark hair curled around his ears enticingly, and his gaze left her breathless. He was staring at her, and her mother. At least it appeared as if he was. She could be wrong. With a quick glance she surveyed her surroundings. No, there wasn’t anyone else near enough for it to be anyone else. Who was he?
“Are you listening to me?” her mother demanded.
“Hmm?” she said absentmindedly. The man called to her on a level she didn’t understand, and wasn’t sure if she wanted to. He might make this evening worthwhile after all. She’d have to introduce herself later, after she made sure to speak to both her parents. “I think I’ll go say hello to father.”
After she hugged her mother she turned on her heels to leave. She didn’t want to give her mother any reason to keep talking. Belle had heard it all before. Why should she listen to her tirade any longer? It had been old before and now it was ridiculous. She loved her mother, but that didn’t mean she had to follow a path of her design. This was her life and she’d live it as she chose, not how her mother wanted her to.
Belle strolled over to her father’s side and waited for him to quit speaking. He turned toward her and smiled. “I didn’t see you come in. Have you been here long?”
“No. I arrived a short time ago.” She gestured to the room in general. “This is a huge turnout. What’s the cause this time?”
Her father was as far from a corrupt politician as one could get. He supported a lot of liberal causes that put the conservatives on edge. He was big on preserving the environment and cutting down this generation’s carbon footprint. It was one of the things that appealed to the voters. He was charismatic and had big ideas. Those ideas kept him in office, and they evolved with whatever he deemed necessary to the preservation of the country he loved. Sometimes she wondered what her parent’s saw in each other. They were two totally different people.
“This one is to raise awareness to a number of environmental concerns. There is also a few endangered species I want to bring attention to.” He grinned. “If you get me going on this topic you won’t be able to shut me up.”
“You’re enthusiastic about it.” She smiled back at him. “I see nothing wrong with that.”
Her father was amazing, but he never had a lot of time for her. His causes always pulled him way from the family. She rarely saw her parents when she was growing up. It wasn’t a bad childhood. Belle had everything she could possibly want or need. Except attention from the two people who had brought her into the world. She’d accepted it, mostly. They meant well and they loved her in their own way. That was all that counted.
“Pardon me, Senator Brennan,” a man interrupted. He was glancing around the room with agitation. “I was wondering if you had a moment to speak privately.”
“I’m sorry this isn’t a good time,” her father stated. “Please set up an appointment and I’ll gladly speak with you in my office.”
The man sighed and shook his head. “I’ve already tried that. Your secretary said you don’t have any immediate openings. Please, sir, it’s important.”
Her father nodded, resigned, to dealing with him. “I’m sorry, dear. We’ll catch up later.”
“Don’t worry about it. I know how to entertain myself.”Belle sadly, did. This sort of thing happened more often than not. Perhaps she should seek out the gentleman who’d been staring at her earlier. His gaze had promised entertainment. She could use a diversion. After scanning the room and being unable to locate him she became resigned to another boring evening.
Why did she even come to these functions anymore? She should go home and kick her shoes off. Days off didn’t come around often enough for her to enjoy as it was. She’d already handled all the niceties by speaking with both her parents. In all honesty she could leave and call it good. They’d not bother her any more that evening. An appearance was all that was required of her. She grabbed a glass of champagne off the tray of a nearby waiter and downed it. She set it on a different waiter’s tray passing by, and grabbed another. She sent up a silent thanks for her parents’ belief in having plenty of wait staff on hand for their fundraisers. One was always nearby when a drink was needed.
“What are we drinking to?”
Belle turned toward the man she’d been thinking of a few moments prior. Damn he was sneaky and quiet. Where had he come from? “My freedom for the evening. You?”
“I’m not much for drinking.”
She wanted to call bullshit, but refrained. It hadn’t been her imagination that he’d been nursing his own glass of champagne earlier. Though she supposed he could have not finished it. Maybe he’d grabbed a glass for show. These events could be rather tedious and boring. Sometimes it helped to have something to hold onto.
“Your loss.” She grinned. “I rather enjoy a good glass of champagne every now and then.”
He lifted it from her hands and set it aside. “Why drink when you can do other things to make you feel just as pleasurable.”
Belle shivered at his words. More pleasurable indeed—what did he have in mind? Down girl—you don’t even know his name. “I agree.” She licked her lips. “However I don’t have anything else to elicit such feelings so I’m opting for a known quantity.”
Let’s see what he takes from that. She itched to pick her champagne glass back up and take a sip. She resisted, but only because what she really wanted was to put her hands on his chest and see if he felt as good as he looked. When had she turned into a wanton? What was it about this man that made her want to throw all caution to the wind and take a chance? This was not h
er, and yet she liked it.
His steel grey eyes filled with something she couldn’t quite identify. Desire? Interest? Whatever it was it made her tingle from the inside out. “Maybe I can help you with that.”
She bet he could. He was so damn delectable. “Why sir I’m not that kind of lady.” She leaned into him and ran her hand across his jacket. “At least not without a proper introduction first.”
“What’s the fun in that?” He leaned down and whispered in her ear. His hot breath caressed her cheek. “Don’t you like a little mystery?”
Ah hell. He was smooth. “Does this usually work for you?”
He chuckled lightly. “Yes, actually it does.”
Belle believed him. She was about to throw herself into his arms and beg him to take her in front of everyone. Her body lit up hotter and brighter than a firework on the 4th of July. What would it hurt to give in and take what she wanted? His words promised they could enjoy each other and leave any and all expectations behind. Could she do it? She might need a little more liquid courage to throw away all her inhibitions. She glanced up and was mesmerized once again by the gray pools of his eyes. All she had to do was reach up and she could run her fingers through his dark tresses. Would he let her? Ah, yes, he would. He wanted her to give in and take what he was offering.
“Your offer does sound—intriguing,” she replied. “I’m not sure it’s for me though.”
“Oh sweetheart,” he said huskily. “You’re the only one it could ever be for. Don’t think, just feel.”
He leaned down and brushed his lips across hers. A rush of tingles spread throughout her entire body. The jolt pushed her forward and she gave in. She wrapped her arms around him and allowed herself to become lost in his kiss. Working in the hospital drained her and left her without any motivation to do anything other than crash in her bed. This man did things to her that she’d never experienced before. She wanted all of it.
The kiss ended as abruptly as it began. He stepped back and lifted his hand to caress her cheek. “Let’s get out of here.”
She should say no. It wasn’t a wise choice to leave with a man she didn’t know. “Where would we go?”
His lips twitched into a smile. “As luck would have it I have a room here. Say the word and I’ll take you there.” He leaned down, his nose touching hers. “I promise you won’t regret it.”
That showed how little he knew her. She’d regret it, dissect it, and question every part of it. It would bother her until the day she died. The very fact she was contemplating going through with it was so out of character for her she might as well be someone else entirely. He was so enticing, and out of her league. His touch was magic and she wanted to drown herself in it.
Was she really going to do this? Yes, absolutely she was. For once she’d take something she wanted and the consequences be damned. “Lead the way, Mr. Mysterious.” She promised herself she wouldn’t think to hard about what she was about to do. If she did she’d back out of it. So she focused on what she wanted. One night where she’d have all of him, and he’d have all of her. Tomorrow wasn’t always promised after all. So she’d take it and keep it as a treasured memory.
“Thank Heavens.”
He didn’t wait for her to change her mind. The enigmatic man pulled her hand into his and led her away from the ball room. The time for conversation had ended and the promise of something wonderful awaited her on the horizon. They rushed to his room. He caressed her every step of the way. In the elevator he kissed her breathless. In the hall outside his room he pushed her against the wall and ran his hands up the skirt of her dress. Her body was alight with sensation. It took a long time for them to even make it into his room and make good use of the bed inside. It was wild, thrilling, and more than she could have ever imagined.
Every part, every inch, and every single touch was perfect.
It truly was. That night was one she’d never forget. He kept every one of those promises he made and then some. She was loved in so many different ways she’d lost count. Her body ached in a good way. He was an amazing lover, and he ruined her for all other men.
Somewhere in the aftermath of passion and the contentment only found after truly unforgettable loving she’d thought she heard him whisper, “I’m better as a memory than as your man...”
Then he left without a word. It broke her heart into a million pieces. He promised she wouldn’t regret the night in his arms. In a way he was right. She’d not have traded it for anything in the world, but she did regret one thing.
Belle never did get his name.
CHAPTER ONE
Cain Dempsey studied the scene in front of him. His partner at the FBI laid sprawled out on the office floor. Blood oozed from a bullet wound to the head and pooled around him. Fuck. It was a damn mess. They’d been deep undercover in a covert mission, and apparently their cover had been blown. The members of the Garcia syndicate had to be hunting for him. Steve’s death was a clear indication of trouble waiting for him. How could he have allowed this to happen? He was usually so careful. There was no helping it. There was only one choice he had left. It was time to bail and take cover. If he couldn’t get away from Carlos Garcia’s home he’d be a dead man.
He eased his way down the hallway making sure to make as little sound as possible. When he arrived at the end he stopped and listened. There were voices in the distance. Each step would take him away from danger, but it was fraught with it as he continued on. Which way to go? The voices seemed to be moving away. He breathed a sigh of relief and turned the corner. He made it to the patio door and slid it open, exiting quickly. The night sky was dark the only light that shown was from the moon. He’d be able to get clear and disappear into the night.
“Well, look what I found.” Bruno Santiago whistled. “Boss’s looking for you. He has a few questions.”
Cain stilled at Bruno’s voice. He’d been close to escaping damn it. “Oh?” He turned toward him with a raised eyebrow. “What’s he want to talk about.”
If he had to hazard a guess it probably had something to do with Steve’s dead body and his connections to the FBI. Either way Cain wasn’t about to stick around and find out—he rather enjoyed breathing. There was no way around it. He’d have to disable Bruno and make his way to the boat house and grab a speed boat. The fastest way to escape was across Lake Ryn. Once he was on the other side he could make his way to his hidey hole to grab his gear.
“It’s not your place to ask the questions.” Bruno glared at him. “Come with me and you’ll find out all you want to know.”
Nope. Not happening. He’d be dead before he had a chance to do anything. Bruno was not forcing him back into the house. If he went inside he’d not be coming back out. Ever. “Do we have to do this now? I have an appointment in town.”
“I bet you do.” Bruno sneered. “I’m afraid you won’t be making it.”
Yup. If there was any doubts that his cover was blown Bruno’s attitude made it crystal clear. What had tipped the crime lord off? There had to have been some sort of slip up for them to have been made. Whatever it was Cain would have to figure it out later. He had to get away and report to his superiors about all of it, not to mention Steve’s death.
“I’d rather not. It’s important.”
“That’s too bad.” Bruno pulled out a gun and pointed it at Cain. “Start moving.”
“Is the gun really necessary?”Cain froze and studied Bruno for a few quick seconds. He could disable him if he played it right. First he’d have to get the gun from him. After that he could knock him out and make a break for the boat house. He took a step toward Bruno, and put more distance between him and the house.
“Yes it is, and I believe you’re well aware why.”
Cain took another step forward. If he kept him talking he might not realize what he was up to. Bruno wasn’t the brightest person to begin with. He could use that to his advantage. “I’m clueless actually. Why don’t you explain it to me?” He took another step.
“I am moving.” Cain smiled menacingly. “In the direction of my choosing.”
He acted with swift precise movements. His hand wrapped around Bruno’s wrist and yanked. The gun went off, a bullet hitting him in his side. The pain burned through him, but he fought through it. The fight was quicker than it seemed. Bruno was sprawled out on the back yard unconscious. His gun laid firmly in Cain’s grip.
Cain glanced around the yard quickly and then bolted toward the boat house. The gunshot would alert everyone and they’d come running soon to see what the commotion was about. He couldn’t be there when they arrived. He rushed to the nearby speed boat and started it. He saw movements from behind him, but he was already well on his way across the lake before they could reach him. Gunfire could be heard in the distance. They were trying to shoot him, or the boat, he couldn’t be sure. Either way it was a near thing.
He was already bleeding from the wound he received fighting with Bruno. Cain couldn’t afford any more wounds. It was a battle to stay focused on his escape. If he lost consciousness he was a dead man—a sitting duck for Carlos Garcia to swoop in and take back to torture for information. He refused to give the bastard any kind of leverage, and allow the man to murder another innocent.
Not that Cain was innocent. He’d done a lot in his life he wished he’d done different. A flash of dark brown hair burnished with red highlights, and ocean blue eyes flashed before him. Why was he thinking about her now? She was never far from his thoughts. He wanted her more than he wanted anything. He’d had one night with her, and in truth it would never be enough. It had to be though. She deserved more than what he had to offer.