“For the love of heaven!”
“Mind the little darlin’, Mary Lee. She’s showin’ good sense for a change.” Deke gently shoved her toward the back door.
“Well, I guess I know when I’m not wanted.”
“You’re wanted, mi amante. Eli can stay in here and see that these two don’t kill each other, and he’ll take care of a car if it comes in.”
“I should help. Trudy cooked most of the supper.” Mary Lee was protesting as Jake, with his hand in the small of her back, was urging her out the door.
Eli watched until they reached the truck, then turned with a puzzled look on his young face.
“What changed her mind? She hasn’t given him the time of day all week. He was so down in the mouth he’d gotten downright crotchety at times — not that I blamed him.”
“She’s been worried half out of her mind about that loan.” “Do you think she likes him?”
“She more than likes him, clabberhead.”
“Fiddle! I don’t know anythin’ ’bout women.”
“Not many men do.” She looked knowingly at Deke, who grinned and chucked her under the chin.
“I know ever’thin’ about women, darlin’. Just ask me somethin’.”
“Do ya think she’ll marry him?” Eli was like a dog with a bone; he wasn’t going to let go.
“She has to be asked first. You heard what he said the other night. He considers himself a jailbird and not good enough for her, and she thinks he just feels sorry for her.”
“That’s a bunch of bull. He likes her a lot. I know he does! Hell and damnation! If all you’re going to do is look at each other with calf eyes, I’ll go listen to the radio so you can smooch.”
“Thanky, son. I’ll do the same for you someday.” Deke threw his arm around Trudy.
“One of these day’s Mary Lee’ll catch you cussin’ and you’ll wish you were in … China.”
“Hush, darlin’. He’s gone. Give me a kiss.”
Chapter 28
“WE HAVE A DATE. REMEMBER?” Jake’s soft voice was close to her ear.
“Where are we going?”
“Out to look at the stars.”
“We can see the stars from here.”
“We’ve seen these stars. I know where there are new ones, bigger and brighter.”
“Aren’t you smart?” Excitement quickened her heartbeat.
“I put a clean blanket over the seat.” With his hand beneath her elbow, he helped her step up onto the running board and into the truck.
“Where are we going?” she asked again when they turned west on the highway.
“California.”
“California?” In the light from an approaching car she could see a flash of white teeth and knew that he was smiling. “Do you have enough gas?”
“When we run out we’ll have to thumb it the rest of the way.” The face he turned toward her was relaxed, smiling. He looked younger, more like the boy she had met years ago. When he reached for her hand, she put it in his. She could feel every nerve in her body responding to his touch.
“I suppose you’ll expect me to stand along the highway and hold my dress up showing my knees like Claudette Colbert did in the picture show It Happened One Night?”
“Why did she do that?”
“Show her legs? To catch a ride.”
“Did you see the picture?”
“No. Trudy told me about it.”
“We’ll go to a picture show sometime.”
Mary Lee didn’t know what to say. Their two clasped hands rested on the seat between them. He released hers when he slowed the truck and turned off onto a dirt road. A short while later, he pulled over and stopped.
“It’s high up here and might be a little cool, but I want you to get out and look at the sky. Wait,” he said when she opened the door. He hurried around to help her out. “The ground is rough. I don’t want you to fall.”
He held her close to him as they walked a short distance. When they stopped, they were on a rocky ledge overlooking the river.
“That’s the Pecos down there.”
“I can hear it.”
“Look at the stars, querida. Aren’t they bigger and brighter than the ones in town?” He had moved behind her and, with his hands on her upper arms, pulled her back to lean against him.
“It’s because there’s no light anywhere out here,” she said in an awed whisper. “It’s beautiful and so quiet. It’s like we’re the only people in the world.”
“Yeah. I see a big star with your name on it.”
“Where?”
He tilted her chin. “Up there next to that little one.”
“I see it now.” She turned her head and laughed up at him.
“Several years ago, when I had my land, there was a place like this. Sometimes I’d go out there at night, look at the stars and daydream.”
“What did you dream about?”
“What most men dream about, I suppose. A home, family, horses grazing on my own land.”
“Then they took it all away, didn’t they?”
“Not all of it. I still have the dreams.” His arms moved across her chest and enfolded her. “Cold?” His lips were close to her ear.
“No.”
“You shivered.”
“Because what they did to you was so unfair.”
“Do you have even a little bit of suspicion that I might have been guilty?”
“Absolutely none.”
“Lord!” he sighed. “I was afraid to ask.”
“After I met you, I knew you hadn’t done what you’d been accused of.”
“How did you come to that conclusion?”
“Well, for one thing … if you’d been guilty you wouldn’t have come back here.”
“I wouldn’t let my accusers think they’d run me off.”
“They’ll think that when you and Deke go to Oklahoma.”
“Where did you get an idea like that?”
“Mr. Fleming offered you a job.”
“If I wanted to leave here, I’d sure take him up on the job. But my life is here and I suspect Deke’s is too … now.”
She took a shallow breath, then said, “Uh-oh.”
“What’s wrong?” he asked anxiously, and loosed his arms.
“Gaston’s playing football.”
Jake chuckled softly. “Little stinker wants our attention.” He moved his hand down to her waist. “May I reassure him that we know he’s there?”
“Do you think that’s what he wants?” She guided his hand beneath the loose shirt until it rested on her roiling abdomen.
“We’ll find out if he calms down. Calm down, little man,” he said softly as if he were gentling a flighty little mare. “There, now, it’ll be all right. You’ll be out of there soon.”
Mary Lee was moved almost to tears on hearing his soft voice talking to her baby. This big, rough, sometimes violent man was everything she’d ever hoped to have as the father of her children but never dreamed she would find.
His large hand moved slowly and carefully over her swollen belly. She could feel his heart pounding against her back and his warm breath against the side of her face as he stroked the lump that was the baby inside her.
“I can never get over the wonder of it,” he said softly. “I can feel him moving. He’s in a hurry to get out and face the world.”
“He … might be a she.” Mary Lee was so moved emotionally, she could barely speak.
“A pretty little girl with blue eyes and dark auburn hair.” His mouth was close to her ear.
“I’ll take whatever I get.” Leaning against his strength, she closed her eyes. She would remember this moment forever: his strong, warm hand stroking her belly and the child within, the star-studded sky overhead and darkness wrapping them in its warm blanket.
“He’s quieted down,” he whispered.
“He must know how happy I am right now.”
“Are you happy being with me?”
“Can
’t you tell?”
“You’ve hardly looked at me lately.”
“I’ve been about sick with worry over losing the court.” “That’s all settled now. You don’t worry. Hear me?” His nose was buried in her hair.
“I hear you. Jake? Eli has got to go to school. He’ll not want to go and leave me. You’ll have to help me persuade him.”
“Will Trudy be there during the day?”
“If she doesn’t leave with Deke. I want her to be happy, but I’m selfish. I don’t want her to go.”
“Deke’s crazy about her. I was hoping they would take to each other.”
“I’ll be able to pay her now for helping me, and I can have the telephone connected. I was worried about how I’d let the doctor know when the baby comes.”
“I’d better get you back to the truck before you get cold.” He drew his hand reluctantly from beneath her shirt.
They walked back, his arm around her holding her securely to him. Inside the truck, he reached for her and she went willingly to nestle against him. Her head was on his shoulder, her warm breath on his neck. She was soft and warm and so damn sweet. He wished to God they could stay here forever. He was holding heaven in his arms.
“Jake?” Her soft voice came out of the darkness.
“Yes, querida mía.”
“You told me one time that those Spanish words meant ‘stubborn little mule.’ I don’t believe you now. What do they mean?”
“Are you sure you want to know?”
“Yes, unless they mean something worse than ‘stubborn little mule.’ ”
His laugh was low, intimate. His arms tightened. “If I tell you, you might not want me to call you that again. I think of you as ‘querida mía.’ ”
“If you won’t tell me, I’ll ask Rosa Santez.”
“Then I’d better tell you. You might get the word wrong and Rosa would come after me with a skillet. ‘Querida’ means … ‘beloved.’ ”
She caught her breath, and then there was a long pause before she spoke.
“Is it true? You think of me as … that?”
“I hadn’t intended to tell you this when we came out here tonight.” With fingers beneath her chin, he turned her face up to his. “It’s something I’ve known for a while, thought about a lot and worried about what you would say if you knew. I had about given up thinking that I’d ever tell you. Now I’m afraid that you’ll think me a stupid man reaching for the stars.”
“What is it, Jake. You’re scaring me.” Her hand came up to his cheek.
“I love you, Mary Lee Finley. I’ve never said those words out loud, but I’m saying them now. I … love … you.” He spaced the words for emphasis. “I’m in love with you. Completely, unconditionally, forever.”
“Oh, Jake! Are … you sure?”
“I’ll not burden you with it.”
Her arm moved up and around his neck. “Jake Ramero, I love you too. It’s been eating me up. I just couldn’t see how you could have feelings for me when I’m so clumsy and … ugly. I was just sure that you only felt sorry for me.”
“You’re beautiful, my beloved. Just as beautiful as that little girl who cried over my sore feet years ago. Just as beautiful as that proud girl who came to the door a few months back, looked me in the eye, and told me to move.” He was smiling when he touched his lips to hers and kissed her gently, reverently. “Even then, I was as smitten with you as I was when I was just a kid.”
“But the baby …”
“I think of him as mine, amor, because he’s yours. When he comes, I would like for his name to be Ramero and not Clawson. Do you think that’s possible?”
“That would mean —”
“That we marry. I never thought I would ask you to be the wife of a jailbird. But, querida mía, I don’t think I can bear the long, lonely years ahead without you. Think carefully, sweetheart, before you answer. Folks won’t forget I spent time in prison.”
“I’m the daughter of the town drunk, remember? It was even worse because the drunk was my mother. Folks won’t forget that either.”
“I don’t have but six horses, a truck, and a heart full of love for you. I’ll work my fingers to the bone to take care of you … and Gaston.”
“We’ll have the court. We’ll get by until you can get back to ranching again. I know that’s your dream and I’ll help you in any way I can.”
“Mother of God, don’t let me wake from this dream.” He breathed the prayer against her lips, then kissed her, and kissed her again. His mouth on hers was incredibly sweet and warm. His tongue stroked her full lower lip, and her arms tightened about his neck.
He lifted his head; his eyes, soft with love, drank in her face. Then, with a deep sigh, he held her head to his shoulder while he gently stroked her hair. They sat quietly for a while, hugging each other. Then he lifted her chin.
“I love you, querida. I will never say the words but to you and ours.” His voice was husky and quivered with emotion.
“Beloved. I do —” The words melted on her lips when she tried to speak, swept away by his kisses.
His hand moved down over her breast. “Will they be this full after … ?”
“They’re swollen now.”
“I’ll see them someday.”
“I’ll be all yours. You’ll be all mine.”
“Ahhh … that’s what I want to hear.” He kissed her long and hard, his mouth taking savage possession, parting her lips and invading them in a wild, sweet, wonderful way. His hand stroked her, touching her hungrily from breasts to abdomen. “Oh, love, I’ll be so careful of you …”
“Not too careful, I hope.”
His laugh was low and intimate. His eyes danced lovingly over her face. His hand curled possessively around her breast.
“I’ll remember three days in my life for as long as I live: the day I hobbled to your house for a drink of water, my first birthday cake and this day, by far the happiest day of my life.”
His kiss was long and deep and full of promised passion that flared whenever they touched. His fingers moved up into her hair, their touch strong and possessive. She took his kiss thirstily. She wanted to stay in his arms forever. His lips pulled away, but he drew her closer.
“My life has been empty up to now. You fill it completely.” He kissed her again. Her lips were clinging moistly to his. His hand slipped beneath the loose shirt and cupped her full breast. Her nipple hardened. “You’ll soon have milk,” he whispered huskily.
“Uh-huh …”
His lips fell hungrily to hers. They were demanding yet tender. “I’d better stop this and take you home.”
She laughed and pulled away from him. “This has been quite a day.”
“I don’t want it to end, but if I don’t take you back soon, Eli will be coming after me with a shotgun.”
“You’ll help me persuade him to go to school?”
“He needs clothes, honey. He would be embarrassed to go in the ones he has.”
“I’ll give him money to buy some. I’ll call it back wages or he won’t take it. Jake, I want him to be part of our family.” She looked anxiously up into his face.
“Of course. He loves you. But … not as much as I do.” He started the truck. “No, stay here,” he said when she attempted to move away. “I can see that I’m going to have to teach you how to shift gears.”
Eli was stunned when Mary Lee told him that she and Jake were going to be married and that they wanted him to be a part of their family. When he didn’t say anything, she looked at him anxiously.
“You do want to be with us, don’t you?”
“ ’Course I do. I’m just surprised … is all.”
“Why? I’ve told you all along that I want you to be with me always. We both want you to be our son, the same as … Gaston.”
“Gaston? Is that what you’re goin’ to call him?”
“Not on your life! Jake’s been calling him that. Eli, now that I don’t have to worry about the loan, I can afford to pay yo
ur back wages. I’m going up to the bank this morning —I can’t wait to see Mr. Rosen’s face when I give him the money. Will you come with me?”
“If you want me to.”
“Jake made me promise not to leave the court unless I had you or Trudy with me.”
“Does he think someone will try to hurt you again?”
“No. He’s afraid I’ll fall down, or the baby will come and I’ll not have anyone with me. We’ll go by the telephone office and have the telephone connected. Oh, it’s wonderful, Eli, not to have to worry about that loan.”
When the wash was on the line, Eli and Mary Lee left for town. Trudy would stay near the house, and when they got back, they would all pitch in and clean the cabins.
Mary Lee wore one of Rosa’s daughter’s dresses, her small straw hat and the last pair of stockings she owned. They had only a small run that she hoped wouldn’t be noticed. She was neat but felt as big as a barrel. The baby was all out front. They had walked just a few blocks when her back began to ache and she feared that she would have to sit down. She managed to get to the bank and sat down on one of the benches in the lobby.
After resting until her breathing was even, she went to the window and asked to speak to Mr. Rosen.
“He was about to go home for dinner. I’ll see if he will see you. Your name?”
“Curtis Wessels, you know my name. We went to the same school. Stop acting so stuck-up and go tell Mr. Rosen I want to see him.”
Clenching his teeth to hold back a retort, he knocked on the office door, then opened it and disappeared inside. He returned a short time later.
“Mr. Rosen will see you, but only for a few minutes. He’s very busy today.”
“That’s very kind of him. Come on, Eli.”
“No!” The young man moved to block the swinging door so Eli couldn’t follow Mary Lee.
“Yes!” Mary Lee said with extra force. “He comes with me.”
“Mr. Rosen said to let you come in.”
“Curtis Wessels, you’re just as big a dope as you were when we were in school. Now get out of the way. Come on, Eli. Let’s see if Mr. Rosen is as rude as his hired help.”
Mary Lee knew that this new courage had come to her because of Jake’s love. She would never knuckle under or cower again.
Song of the Road Page 29