by Susan Laine
“Sorry if I woke you. Didn’t mean to.” Simon actually sounded bashful, and that tipped Sam off that something had changed.
Sam blinked and glanced at the alarm clock on the bedside table. It was past noon. “I don’t mind. Don’t wanna sleep all day.”
“You’re entitled to sleep in for a couple of days. If Mom gets her wish, it’ll be closer to a week or two.”
“God, I hope not. I’d miss school.”
“You’re such a weirdo.”
“Weird and proud of it.”
“And don’t worry. I brought you your homework. The teachers miss you too, their star pupil.”
Sam blushed and ducked his head. He was proud of his straight A’s, perfect attendance, and extracurriculars. He had cause to be, and he was one of those people who actually liked college and learning new things. If that made him an outcast from the young adult populace, so be it.
“Thanks. I appreciate that. So….” Sam glanced at his big brother under his brow. “You didn’t think I was dead or something?”
Simon shrugged, but the tightening line of his mouth showed he was not indifferent. “I… I thought it was best to stay positive. Mom was freaking out, and Dad was fretting over every minute that passed. Someone had to keep a cool head.”
“I’m glad they had you to support them.” Simon shrugged again, looking away. He seemed anxious about something. Sam had a pretty good idea what it was. “Ask me what you want, or tell me what’s on your mind.”
Simon locked gazes with Sam. “You and Marcus, then, huh?”
Sam swallowed hard but lifted his chin in defiance. “Yeah.”
“How long’s that been a thing?”
“Not long. For the duration of our trip, if you must know.”
“Ah. Whose idea was this trip?”
Sam hesitated. “It was sort of a… an impromptu thing. By accident, you know.”
Simon stared at Sam so long without speaking that Sam started to sweat. “Huh. Well, considering how long the guy’s been carrying a torch for you, I’m surprised he finally acted on it.”
Sam’s eyes widened in shock. “You knew? This whole time?”
Simon chuckled. “About what? That Marcus swings both ways or that the first time he saw you years ago his eyes lit up like a Christmas tree? Yeah, kinda hard to miss.”
“Oh.” Sam was fresh out of words. “Why didn’t you ever say? I mean, I….” He didn’t know if he should come clean about how long he’d had feelings for Marcus too.
Simon got there first. “Look, Sam, I’ve seen how you look at him too when he’s not looking. But, you know, your sex life’s none of my business. You two had to figure things out on your own.”
Sam worried his bottom lip. “So… you’re not upset we’re having sex?”
Simon’s eyes narrowed. “What kind of sex? And don’t worry about embarrassing me. This falls under the big brother purview. Unless of course you want to discuss possibly taking it up the ass with Mom and Dad.”
“God, no!” Sam’s heart almost stopped then and there, the thought of having the sex talk with his parents now that he was actually doing it, and with a guy no less, bothering him more than he cared to admit. Besides, they’d had that damn awkward discussion years ago, when Sam was nine and started to notice he wasn’t like other boys.
Simon smirked, crossing his arms over his chest. “Well, then. Gimme specifics. ’Cause you’re still seventeen, and there’s stuff—”
“Geesh, Simon, stop.” Sam grimaced. “Look, I know all that, okay? And for your information, big brother, we’re not doing….” He held his breath, his cheeks flaming, hardly able to believe he was actually going to say it. “Anal,” he finally whispered, mortified out of his mind.
Simon quirked a knowing eyebrow. “Yet.” Then he shrugged. “Okay, cool. You’ve decided to wait.” He snorted. “That won’t last. Not when you two are alone in a room and there’s a bed within easy reach.”
Sam cringed. “Please, stop. I’m humiliated enough.”
Simon laughed. “Not nearly enough in my honest opinion, baby bro. But fine, I’ll let you off the hook. For now. And… I’ll be having an equally awkward discussion with my boy Marcus too.”
“Go easy on him, please.”
“Of course. What do you think I am? An ogre? Still, if the guy plans on spending time with you in the future, he’s gonna adhere to some rules.” Simon’s eyes held a dark glint. “And next time… no trips to desolate places without telling me, Mom, and Dad first, got it?”
“Check. What about… Mom and Dad?”
“They’re cool with you dating Marcus, and you being gay. It’s not like you’ve been hiding your crush very well. We’ve all known for quite a while. We’re all fine, believe me.”
Sam smiled. A huge weight lifted from his shoulders. He’d been nervous about his big brother’s reaction to him and Marcus. Since that didn’t seem to be a problem, Sam felt relieved and vindicated. His family was okay with him being gay and being in a relationship with Marcus. That surprised Sam pleasantly, especially since they had to suspect the two of them were getting it on.
Now all that was left was coming out to the rest of the world. Though people probably didn’t care who he slept with, nor should they. It was no one’s business.
Sam wasn’t going to hide or cower anymore. That was a life lesson Marcus had taught him on the island, and Sam decided to heed the call of courage and be honest with the world.
The next day, Sam dyed his hair turquoise like his favorite K-pop artists.
“DO YOU still think about girls too?” Sam asked while lying on top of Marcus, both of them naked on Sam’s bed, on a lazy Sunday afternoon a week later.
Marcus had been right. It was easier coming out with a boyfriend. Now they were both out, at home and in college. No one had batted an eye about them holding hands in the hallways. They’d been way more interested in the bruises and wounds. Sam was grateful that these days most kids were enlightened enough to understand that straight wasn’t the only orientation in town. Plus, there were other out kids at Whitefish Lake College, so it wasn’t like the two of them were some sort of gay and bi pioneers.
Despite them being out as gay and as a couple, Sam nonetheless wondered if his beloved might still have a hankering for the fairer sex.
Marcus had his eyes closed and was smiling leisurely as he drew lazy circles over Sam’s back with his fingers. “Well, chipmunk… if Ariana Grande stood in front of me in her black latex Playboy bunny costume and asked to sleep with me right here, right now… hell yeah, I’d drop your ass in a heartbeat.”
Sam chuckled but tickled Marcus till he squirmed. “You’re such a boy slut.”
“You mean… a butt?”
“Shut up.”
“Hey, that rhymes.”
“I’m a poet and didn’t know it.”
“Oh!” they said at the exact same time. They snapped their fingers and laughed as one. The movie reference from The Adventures of Ford Fairlane was old, like from 1990, but it was a flick they’d just seen on TV, so it was fresh on their minds. They didn’t have the energy or patience to watch anything more than reruns of B movies amid their bouts of vigorous sex.
“So…?” Sam gently encouraged Marcus to spill more of his secrets.
“Being bi and with a a guy is great. Especially with you. I might occasionally think of a pretty girl or a hot woman. But… I still wanna sink to my knees in front of you and suck your dick for hours, even at the risk of lockjaw. I still get a boner every damn time I see you, whether you’re doing something insanely hot, like smiling at me, or something stupid and ordinary, like brushing your teeth or doing homework or… or drawing your dirty pictures of me. Yeah, I know what you’ve been doing, my perverted little artist.”
Sam blushed. Instead of the BL comics he usually liked to draw, he’d been doing a lot of so-called boudoir drawings of his hot boyfriend in the buff. He’d just assumed Marcus wasn’t aware of Sam’s guilty pleasure.
>
Marcus’s seductive chuckle sent chills and hot flashes chasing each other up and down Sam’s spine. He couldn’t take the torment anymore.
Sam kissed Marcus slowly, then slipped his tongue past Marcus’s full lips to slide against his. As time passed, their hands wandered and their bodies shimmied together. Sam traced the patterns on his lover’s skin, the once red welts that had turned white, the ones he shared. Not to mention the slashing wounds from the razzie. Now the marks were a part of them, visual proof of their off-world sojourn.
When they parted, Sam let out a sigh. “Ariana, huh? Well, at least you’ve got good taste.”
Marcus grinned. “Duh. I’m with you, aren’t I? Pure genius, that.”
He rolled them both around so that he was on top. Sam giggled and spread his legs to accommodate Marcus between them. Their bodies and cocks aligned, and their hips began to rock and sway on their own. Marcus kissed Sam, nibbled on his bottom lip, licked away the sting, then plunged his tongue into Sam’s mouth, where it intertwined with Sam’s.
Sam wrapped his arms and legs around Marcus as Marcus kissed his way down Sam’s jaw to his neck, softly sucked up a mark or two, and then nibbled on Sam’s earlobe. Sam moaned, his body jolting from a surge of pure physical need. His hips pumped involuntarily, and his dick leaked precome.
“Mmm, love how you respond to me, bae,” Marcus purred.
He kissed Sam’s clavicle, dipped down to lick around Sam’s left nipple, then sucked on the hardening peak. Sam felt his nipple throb like mad from the delicious torment Marcus inflicted upon him. With his beloved boyfriend, he’d entered a whole new world of sensuality he’d only dared to dream about before.
And Sam had fantasies up the wazoo, all inspired by Marcus. He was in a constant rut around his boyfriend, and lately all his dreams had focused on one thing: Marcus inside Sam in a most intimate way.
Yet he knew Marcus wasn’t about to do that just because Sam asked. For a rogue and rebel, Marcus could sometimes be an annoying stickler for the rules. While Sam appreciated acknowledgment of age in matters of sex—some people sure as shit weren’t ready at sixteen, eighteen, or even twenty-one—he was ready right the F now.
Or so he thought….
“God, Sam. I can hear your brain spinning again.” Marcus kissed under Sam’s ear, a little ticklish, a lot hot. “I know what you’re thinking. And the answer’s still no fucking way.”
“But—”
“Look, bae, I checked, okay? The legal age of consent in Montana is sixteen, as you said, and you’re already seventeen. But I’m twenty, and Montana doesn’t have a close-in-age exemption—”
“We’re both over sixteen, so it’s legal. And I’ll be eighteen next week. But if you’re worried… no one has to know.” Sam knew he was treading on thin ice even as he spoke.
Marcus gave him a knowing look that left Sam wilted and red in the face. “I love you, Sam, but—”
“We’re having sex already,” Sam argued. “What does one more position matter?”
Marcus opened his mouth, but surprisingly, nothing came out. He blinked and snapped his mouth shut. Frowning deeply, he seemed to ponder both sides of the argument. At least that was what Sam hoped Marcus was doing. With neither of them under the age of consent, they couldn’t go to jail or be registered as sex offenders. Sam really didn’t see what the problem was.
Then Marcus’s glassy gaze lit up again and refocused on Sam. “You sure you want to do this? Now? With me?”
Sam nodded firmly. “Hell yeah.”
“Fine.” Marcus didn’t seem too pleased, though, not if his scrunched brow was any indication. Sam began to doubt the wisdom of pressuring his boyfriend into doing anal. Then Marcus’s expression softened, and he smiled shortly. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
Sam kissed the top of his nose. “You won’t, I promise. C’mon, Marcus. When have you ever known me to stay silent about anything? Why would I say nothing if I thought you did something wrong?”
“Hmm.” Marcus didn’t seem entirely convinced but he nodded and his cock hardened again. Guess they were back on track. Wherever that path led.
Marcus pulled up and unceremoniously flipped Sam onto his stomach. Sam’s lungs emptied with a whoosh at the rough treatment, and his belly knotted with nerves. The pillow and sheets were soft, warm, and rumpled against his skin. His hips refused to stay still, pumping till he practically humped the mattress. Marcus chuckled evilly and stopped his movements with a hand on the small of Sam’s back.
“Nuh-uh. Bad boy.” Marcus’s playful scolding almost had Sam creaming himself.
Marcus rested his body over Sam’s, his front fitting against Sam’s back perfectly, his dick nestled between Sam’s buttcheeks. They both moved their hips on instinct, too horny to think rationally.
“Like this?” Marcus murmured in Sam’s ear. His breath fanned over the sensitive skin, giving Sam goose bumps. “Like how I touch you? Love how close we are? Wanna go further?”
His cock slid over Sam’s most intimate place, driving him mad with the continuous motions, the touch fleeting but ever-present. Marcus’s dick was hot and heavy and smooth, and Sam pictured Marcus shoving his dick inside Sam in his mind’s eye, that plump piece of meat pushing into his ass, deeper and deeper, until Sam was stuffed full.
“Can you feel me, bae? Feel my cock pushing into you, hard and deep?”
It was so much like the numerous hours of gay porn and yaoi porn Sam had watched since they got back. He groaned loud enough to wake the neighbors. Hopefully they were all napping or shopping at the mall. In his head, every dirty word Marcus uttered came to life, every picture Marcus painted with his seductive utterings heightening Sam’s anticipation.
“Come on already,” Sam whispered, his voice raw and hoarse.
“Not yet.” Marcus could be such a cocktease, dammit.
Sam was drunk on desire. Yet he wasn’t sure how comfortable he was with what was about to take place when he had no prior experience. Sure, there had to be a first time for everything and everyone. But… how could he trust his senses and his body? Would they demand to be filled before he was relaxed enough to feel pleasure rather than pain? His heart and head weren’t quite waging war over it, but it wasn’t a stretch either. His feelings for Marcus cried out for more, more, more, while his rational mind warned him to be careful and cautious.
Marcus moved off. He kneaded Sam’s bunched back muscles, unwinding all the kinks. Sam sighed and relaxed in an instant. This was Marcus, the man who loved him and whom he loved. Sam could trust him.
Marcus massaged Sam’s back, inching slowly lower until he was rubbing his hands along Sam’s plump buttocks. Sam stifled a moan by biting into his bottom lip. His mind was mush. Marcus’s touch felt so good, familiar yet new, strong yet soft. Marcus parted Sam’s asscheeks and licked over Sam’s hole.
“Oh God, oh God, oh God,” Sam moaned repeatedly, clutching the pillow, his dick so hard it hurt as it throbbed along with his heartbeat.
Each sweep of Marcus’s hands sent Sam flying higher. It was sensual, the pure pleasure of being close to the person you loved and wanted. Then Marcus stuck his tongue inside Sam, a wet warmth probing his already fluttering hole and spasming channel.
“Holy shit!” Sam’s exclamation was muffled thanks to the pillow, for which he was grateful.
He was also grateful Marcus kept his hips from jerking, or he might have ended their lovemaking by unintentionally breaking his lover’s nose.
When Marcus pushed his tongue into Sam’s hole, wiggling it past the resistance, Sam thought he couldn’t possibly continue to be so undone. But he was, every damn time. His need and pleasure all centered there, in that hidden place Sam had never himself seen, his own, that was.
Marcus clearly knew what he was doing. He was basically fucking Sam with his tongue instead of his cock. And it was perfect. Sam wanted more. And he was afraid of more. Stupid contradictory body and brain.
Then a moist thumb pressed on Sam
’s vulnerable opening.
Sam’s belly developed a storm of butterflies. And his body clamped up tight.
“I… I’m so sorry,” he murmured, embarrassed at how quickly he’d closed up. “I… I can’t. I thought I could but… I’m not ready. I’m sorry.”
Marcus kissed the curve of his backside and chuckled. “It’s okay. And as it looks like this ain’t happening, that’s okay too. I’m not going anywhere. We can try this later.”
Sam closed his eyes and let out a breath. Sam had lost that thrill of pure excitement and unadulterated need. His dick wilted in seconds. What happened to his groove? He’d dreamed of this, fantasized, anticipated, and assumed he’d treasure the experience. His body had betrayed him. Why? Hadn’t he been imagining doing exactly this for months, if not years? More than anything he wanted to be with his beloved in every sense. And he wanted Marcus to be his first, last, and only one. This should’ve been the best day of his sex life, the culmination of all his expectations. Why was his butt disagreeing with him? Not fair.
“Hey, bae. I promise we’re good.” Marcus left a trail of openmouthed smooches over Sam’s back as he moved up to kiss his nape. “There’s no rush.”
A tender kiss on Sam’s shoulder was followed by a sudden sharp bite that sent Sam’s body reeling—and into sensual overdrive. His dick swelled again, hot and heavy and ready to play.
“Oh yeah…,” Sam moaned, delighted that they hadn’t lost the moment.
“Mm-hmm” came Marcus’s articulate response.
Marcus scooted down again, this time rolling Sam onto his back, and then he swallowed Sam’s dick whole. Sam cried out, thrashing about on the bed while Marcus worked to hold him still with his palms on Sam’s hips. Marcus traced the shape of Sam’s hipbones with his lips and teeth, and then did the same with Sam’s shaft, licking up and down the length, taking his time.
Sam shoved him off. “Stop. No. Too fucking close.”
Marcus merely chuckled, that mischievous streak back in full force. He dipped lower to lick over Sam’s balls and then softly sucked them into his mouth. Sam sobbed and almost popped then and there.