Maggie waited, making sure he made it inside before turning back to Adam. “What are you doing here anyway? Shouldn’t you still be out at the line shack?”
“Daly sent me to check in with the boss. Neither of us like you two being here on your own. Nothing much is happening up there anyway. Weather’s been mild so far.”
“Pa thinks a storm’s coming in.”
Adam nodded. “Looks like it. Hopefully I can make it back before it hits, but Daly was prepared to wait it out on his own if I don’t.” They headed toward the barn together, but had only walked a few steps when he asked, “What do you know about that man?”
She thought about what William said when she asked him more about his life, and her heart hurt. She didn’t think that’s what Adam wanted to know. “Not a lot. He was hurt, and Pa helped him. He’s been helping around here, at least until he hurt himself again.”
“Maybe there was a reason he was hurt in the first place. Maybe I should stay here and keep an eye on things.”
“Adam, Pa’s perfectly capable of that. Will isn’t going to hurt either of us anyway. You need to relax.”
“I don’t trust him.”
“You don’t have to. You also don’t have to worry about us.”
His fingers brushed against her arm. “I always worry about you, Maggie.”
She barely had time to think about his response before he left her at the door of the barn to go to her father. She remembered she still had chores to finish that she’d set aside while walking with William. She needed to get those done, then she’d go back in to check on him. At least make sure he made it to his bed.
Her face flushed, which was ridiculous. She wanted to make sure he was doing all right. That was all. She turned toward the chicken coop and forced herself to focus on the chores.
Chapter 15
Barnes Ranch, Colorado
December 8, 1887
William stepped out onto the porch. The wind still blew some snow around, but the storm had finally moved on. Two days. They’d been pounded with snow and wind for two days. The skies had looked bad by dinner, and George suggested Adam stay until morning. He hadn’t been able to ride out in the morning through the blinding snow. He’d been stuck there until the storm died down.
Now, two sets of tracks led out to the barn. He must be getting ready to leave. William doubted George would send him off without breakfast. His shoulders tensed as the two men came back out of the barn.
After their initial confrontation, the other man pointedly ignored him. Instead he’d spent the whole time talking to Maggie, leaving William alone.
It wasn’t a problem. He’d sat by the fire and thought about how he could find Thomas again. He wouldn’t be able to get word of him again. He wouldn’t even know who it was safe to ask, who would take Thomas’ side. He didn’t have anyone to reach out to, except George and Maggie, and they didn’t even know who William really was. What if they were on Thomas’ side as well? They didn’t seem the type, but Thomas had fooled good people before.
Asking around hadn’t worked out so well for him the last time. He’d have to be more cautious about it.
Now, with the snow stopped, he could think about going after his brother again. His side still hurt, and a twinge went through his shoulder, but he couldn’t stay here indefinitely. He already felt like he’d used up all of their hospitality, even though both Maggie and George would deny that. He needed to move. They didn’t need his help here, and he hated feeling useless.
Adam and George stepped up onto the porch. He swore he felt the younger man’s hostility. He hadn’t done anything. Adam was the one who kept putting his arm around Maggie. The one who always had his head bent down by hers. Who laughed at everything she said.
He realized he had his fist clenched inside his coat and forced himself to relax.
George clamped his hand down on William’s good shoulder. “What are you doing out here?”
“I was going to head down to the barn to help with the chores.”
“Adam helped me with them. You should be inside resting. I don’t want to have to pick you up off the ground again.”
William’s teeth scraped together. “I’m fine. Sewn up tight this time.”
“You were last time, too. You still pulled it open. There’ll still be chores for you when you’re a bit stronger. Just rest now, Will.”
Adam shifted from one foot to the other on the other side of George, his face still impassive. He only lost that stoic look when he was around Maggie. Any other time William couldn’t tell if he felt anything, or if even one thought went through his head. It was disconcerting.
“I thought I’d ride out in another day or two,” he mentioned as they all headed for the door.
He felt George’s stare on the back of his head, but he didn’t look at the other man. “You’re free to go any time you want, Will. I’m still not thinking it’s a grand idea.”
“I can’t stay here forever, George,” he said as they stepped inside. “I still have to find him.”
George shook his head. “One day you’ll realize there are better things than revenge.”
“I don’t want revenge. I want justice. He’ll never pay if I don’t bring him in. I can’t live with that.”
“If you try to go after him now, you won’t make it a day in the saddle. If you fall in the trail, I won’t be there to pick you up. You may not like who is.”
Maggie gasped, and he turned to face her. “You’re riding out, too, Will?”
His stomach clutched as he looked at her. Her knuckles whitened around the spoon she held in her hand. He wished he couldn’t see the distress in her eyes. “Soon,” he said. It didn’t matter. It couldn’t matter. “I have to find him. He’s gotten away for too long.”
“You’re not healed yet,” she protested.
He hated seeing the tears sheening her eyes. It made his voice rough. “I’ve healed enough. I’ll keep healing while I look for him.”
She turned away from him but not before she bit down on her lip. He wanted to bite his own tongue. He hadn’t wanted to hurt her, but he couldn’t stay here forever. He’d thought she’d be glad to be rid of him. She wouldn’t have to play nurse to him anymore.
“It’s going to be a couple days before the trails are manageable out of here anyway,” George said. He turned to Adam. “The path out to the line shack is sheltered, but it won’t be much better. You could think about staying another day, too.”
Adam shook his head. “Daly’s been out there on his own for three days. I should get back and make sure he’s all right.”
“That old codger has seen worse blizzards than this, Adam. He’ll be fine. If you feel you need to go, I won’t hold you back. You can return if you can’t get through the pass.”
“Of course. I’ve been through worse blizzards than this, too.”
Plates clattered on the table. “Breakfast’s ready,” Maggie said, but she still didn’t make eye contact with any of them.
The four of them ate in silence. When they finished, Maggie gathered plates without saying a word or looking at anyone. William had the urge to reach out and touch her, but he kept his hand at his side. It wouldn’t be right. He still had to find Thomas and make him pay for what he’d done to his family. Until he’d made that right, nothing else mattered.
George offered to go out and saddle Adam’s horse while the younger man finished his coffee. Adam waited until his boss left before looking across the table at William. “I’d like a word with you,” he said after casting a glance at Maggie. She kept her back to them.
“What is it?”
“I don’t know who you are or what you have goin’ on. I don’t want your trouble coming back on them. Maggie and George are good people. They took my pa and me on when no else would hire a man with a half-breed son. I care about them. I don’t want them hurt.”
William’s chest ached at the words. “That’s not what I want, either. Like I said, I should be riding on soon.” He didn’t wa
nt to. As much as he wanted and needed to find Thomas, the thought of riding away pained him. “I wouldn’t pay George back for saving my life by putting either of them in harm’s way.” One more reason he needed to ride on. The longer he stayed, the more he put them there.
Adam nodded at William before turning to Maggie. “I’ll be going,” he said with a brush of fingers over her shoulder. Even that made William clench his hands into fists. There was no reason for him to be jealous.
“Are you sure you can’t stay even one more day?”
“I’m sure. I’ll be back around when the snow melts.”
William watched him leave then closed his eyes. He wouldn’t be able to make any such promises when he rode away.
#
January 1888
William didn’t ride out in a couple days. As he thought it would be safe to, another storm blew in, worse than the first. When the snow stopped, they could barely open the front door. George climbed out the window to get to the door and make a path out to the barn so they could take care of the horses.
No way he could leave now.
A month passed since he said he would leave. There weren’t more blizzards, but the snow kept coming. The trails were impassable. He didn’t have a choice. He couldn’t leave until the snow melted.
“Nothing to do for it, Will,” George said as wind battered the window shutters.
Maggie carried a cup of coffee over and handed it to him. “You shouldn’t have been out there so long,” she told him.. “You’re going to catch your death that way.”
He’d tried striking a path through the snow. His horse struggled through it for nearly a quarter mile, then William couldn’t make him go any farther. He’d finally returned to the barn, defeated. After brushing down the horse, he’d returned to the house. No one had to ask, it was written all over him.
“I’ve failed them,” he whispered.
“You failed no one,” George said. “You survived a shooting that should’ve killed you. Nothing to be ashamed of.”
“I could have joined them.”
Maggie’s hand squeezed on his shoulder over the blanket she’d already draped over him. He looked up to see her face pinched. “Don’t say that.” Her voice came out as little more than a strangled whisper.
He looked back down into his coffee cup without saying a word. Maggie was there every day, talking to him. Asking him questions about Anna and David. He had trouble evading the questions. In his weaker moments, he answered them. Still, he wanted to touch her. It made him feel like the lowest kind of varmint. It had been nearly eight months since he’d buried his wife. Only two since his son died, and he still hadn’t made his brother pay for destroying everything in his life.
He shouldn’t feel anything for this girl. He loved Anna. He’d wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. He would have given his life for her, for either of them. They’d been taken from him because he was too damn honorable to say no to the sheriff. He wasn’t feeling honorable right now.
His thoughts felt like a betrayal to his family. He should have found justice for them by now, should have avenged their deaths. It was a betrayal to George as well. The man had saved his life. The way to show gratitude wasn’t by having lustful thoughts for his daughter.
She constantly touched him. A simple brush of fingers against his shoulder, a hand on his arm. She smiled at him, and something rolled over in his stomach. The dreams were the worst. He couldn’t push them aside like he did the waking thoughts. She tangled up in them, and the feeling of betrayal ate away at him.
She moved away from him, and he could finally breathe again. If he wasn’t able to leave soon, these feelings would either kill him, or he’d end up doing something that would make him an even lower varmint. He needed to get away from here.
“How long until you think the trails will open?”
George shook his head. “It’ll be a while. Couple months at least.” His face softened. “I’m sorry, Will. I know you want to find him, but there’s nothing you can do.”
He dropped his head, feeling the weight of everything on his shoulders. This was never going to end. He couldn’t rest until he’d brought Thomas in, but at this rate, he’d never find him. George stood up. “I’m going out to check on the horses.”
“I’ll have dinner ready in a bit, Pa.”
He nodded. “I’ll eat when I get back in.”
William didn’t even move when the door slammed closed again. It stopped snowing, but the wind hadn’t settled down. Maggie’s footsteps came from behind him, but he didn’t move, staring into the dark liquid in his cup. Her hand was on his shoulder again. His body tensed as his breath struggled to release from his chest. “You need to stop touching me,” he said, his voice strangled.
She stumbled back a step, and he cursed in his head. “I-I’m sorry, Will,” she stammered.
He shook his head and finally turned to look her. “No, I am. Your pa isn’t in here, and if you keep putting your hand on me, we’re going to be in a bad position when he returns.”
Her face flushed. Her mouth opened a couple times until his name came out. He set the tin cup to the side as she came around in front of him. His hand came up, and he brushed his thumb along her chin. “You do something to me, Maggie,” he murmured. “I shouldn’t feel these things. I loved my wife.” He finally gave voice to his earlier thoughts.
She settled down on the bench beside him. “I know, Will, but she’s not here. You’ve made me feel something since the day Pa showed up with you in the wagon. Sometimes it makes me want to strangle you,” she added with a smile. “Sometimes I just need to touch you.”
He closed his eyes. “This isn’t right.”
“It’s not wrong either, Will. We’ve done nothing wrong.”
“My thoughts are enough to cast me to Hell.”
Her hand came to his face, turning it to look at him. “We’ve done nothing wrong,” she said again.
“And we won’t.” He pulled back from her. “I won’t do this, Maggie. I’m riding on as soon as I can. I won’t use you just because you’re here.”
Her eyes dimmed, then he touched her. A finger along the curve of her jaw. Her head came up with it, and he couldn’t pull his eyes away from her. “Yes, straight to Hell,” he murmured.
He would have kissed her then. She was right there, and their lips were inches apart. Feet stomped on the porch outside, and he jerked away from her. “We won’t do this,” he said before picking up his cup and turning to stare into the fire.
Chapter 16
Barnes Ranch, Colorado
March 12, 1888
William threw another forkful of soiled straw into the wheelbarrow. At least they hadn’t had to shovel another path to the barn in the last two months. There hadn’t been more snow for the last week, but there was still too much to ride out. Still there wasn’t much to do around the ranch right now other than care for the horses and make sure the supply of firewood stayed full. George was out taking care of the latter right now, while William handled the horses. Lifting an ax was still a little too much for William’s shoulder.
With the last stall mucked out, he tossed the dirty straw outside the barn and spread clean on the floor before going out to let the horses back in. As he let the last one in, another horse approached the front of the barn. He hurried to the door, grabbing the rifle leaning against it as he went. He didn’t recognize the horse trotting into the yard, but he did remember the man on his back. He returned the rifle to its resting place and stepped outside.
Adam reined in the horse. His gaze moved around the yard before focusing on William again. “Everyone okay here?”
William nodded. “George is at the wood stack. Maggie should be in the house. You want me to take care of your horse?”
Adam scowled as he looked back down at William. “What are you still doing here? Thought you were riding out.”
“Can’t get through the trails. Trust me, I tried.”
“Don’t k
now why you’re so eager to get away. George treats guests well. Figured you’d scavenge as much as you could like that last varmint.”
“I told you before, I’m not here to take advantage of them. George saved my life. I don’t want to take more than I can give back.”
Adam stared at him for a moment before swinging down from the saddle. “I’ll take care of my own horse. I don’t need you to do anything for me.”
William shrugged. “Fine.” There was more than distrust in the other man’s attitude, which he understood. He almost seemed to hate him, which he couldn’t. What had he ever done to Adam?
He stepped inside the house, and Maggie turned from the fireplace with a smile for him. “Will. I put some coffee on. I figured you and Pa would want some when you came inside.”
“Adam just rode up.”
Her smile wobbled slightly then came back. “Well, there’s enough for him, too.”
William pulled off his gloves and shed his coat before walking over to the fire. He should have dealt with the cold instead of warming his hands over the flames. Being so close to Maggie ignited another blaze inside of him. He closed his eyes. He couldn’t do this. He’d told her he wouldn’t do it. Why couldn’t he stop thinking about it?
Her hand came down to his arm, and he opened his eyes again. She was right there, and he barely bit back a moan. “Maggie.” His voice sounded strained through his lips.
He’d told her to stop touching him, and she did it more. Like she taunted him, testing his power to resist her. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could do that.
Her mouth brushed over his jaw, and all his past arguments flew out the window. He turned his head until his lips met hers, and she gasped against his mouth. He kept his hands at his sides, afraid of what he would do if he touched her. Only the slamming of the door broke them apart. He dragged in a breath before turning his head. Adam stood there, his face even darker than before. His eyes had gone nearly black.
“Not going to take more than you can give back, huh?”
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